Accepted Fate (4 page)

Mentally trailing down that beautiful, little body, my movements pick up. She had perky, full breasts covered by a turquoise and peach swimsuit. It was strapless revealing narrow shoulders, also covered with the lightest brushing of freckles to match her nose. Her stomach was flat and toned as well as her legs. She had the cutest little feet, toenails painted pink and her ankle wrapped in a small, silver chain holding, a heart maybe. I can't be sure.

The last image running through my mind is her body pressed against mine in the sand, perfectly, as if it was made to be there. The way her body felt so warm, her breasts so full. When our bodies touched and our eyes met, I couldn't look away. I didn't want to. All I wanted to do was pull her closer and kiss her, rub my hands along her body. That thought was all it took and I was done, releasing some of that tension into the shower, watching it seep down the drain.

I'm broken from my thoughts of her body pressed against mine with Ryland beating on the door. "Dude, are you going to stay in there all night or do you plan on getting out soon? I still have to shower too, you know." Crap, how long have I been in here? Standing there, hands against the wall, underneath the shower I look down and realize I'm still aroused. You have got to be kidding me. How can I still have a boner? Great, that's going to hurt all night. I've got to get this chick out of my head, but something tells me it's not going to be that easy.

I cannot believe a girl I just met, has me doing this in my best friends shower. This is a new low for me. "I'll be right out," I yell back, so maybe he will move away from the door. I hurry through the rest of my shower and emerge from the bathroom, towel wrapped around my waist.

Ryland is laying across his bed, flipping through the channels on the television. He looks over, a smile forming on his face, as if he knows my dirty little secret. "If you needed some quality time with your little buddy, all you had to do was say so and I could've used the shower downstairs," he says shaking his head at me as he laughs.

Well this is a tad bit embarrassing. Especially, considering I rarely have to resort to this anymore. "Shut up! That's not what I was doing and there is nothing little about my 'buddy' as you call it. The shower is all yours. “I lie back, as a matter of fact, and head over to my suit case, grabbing my clothes. There is no way I'm admitting what just happened because of a chick I only saw one time.

I'm standing in front of the mirror, spraying some cologne, when I hear Crazy Bitch by Buckcherry playing on my phone. This is the last thing I need right now. Waiting on Ryland still, I grab my phone and walk outside onto the balcony for some privacy. "Hey Nat, what's up?" It's silent as if the call has been disconnected. I look down to see if she hung up, but the timer is still clocking the call. Placing it back to my ear, I hear her sniffle like she's crying. "Natalie? What's wrong?" 

She sighs, "Were you even going to call me while you were there?"

You've got to be kidding me. When did she suddenly turn into the needy, emotional type? We rarely talk on the phone. Usually, it's just text messaging. Now, suddenly, I'm more confused than ever. Scrunching my brows, I begin rubbing my forehead. "Was I supposed to call you Natalie? Because I must have missed that message when I texted you from the airport." From the silence, you would think I had slapped her.       

Finally, she sighs again, sounding hurt this time, "All I'm saying is that it would have been nice to hear from you. We usually see each other at least every other day and now you're gone for a week. You are my boyfriend you know. Is it so wrong to want to hear from you? We used to talk on the phone every day before we started dating and now you only text me." Obviously, she rehearsed this before she called from the sound of it. This is exactly what I was afraid of when I agreed to date her. Girls can't handle emotionless relationships. No matter what they say, it turns into an attachment.

She's always been good with giving me my space. I don't know why she's suddenly being a pain, but it's not going to work out in her favor if she keeps it up. I never should have agreed to date her, because it's probably going to ruin a perfectly good friendship. Starting to feel guilty, I sit down on one of the chairs. Closing my eyes, I try to think of the best way to handle this.

Before I can even say anything, she blurts out, "Breyson, I love you."

My eyes go wide in shock. Surely I didn't hear that right. "Natalie..."

I don't even get the chance to finish before she starts to panic. "I'm sorry. You don't have to say it back, I just thought you should know. I didn't mean for it to happen, it just did. It's true though, Breyson, I love you and I miss you."

Yep, I heard that right. Damn. Damn. Damn. We've been friends for three years, good friends, and everything is about to be ruined. This is my fault entirely.

I'm about to be the biggest dick in the universe to someone important to me. What else can I do though, I don't love her. She knew this going in. I exhale the breath I didn't realize I was holding. "You know I can't give you what you want Natalie. I told you this from the beginning. Look, maybe this wasn't the best idea. I care about you, I always will, you were my friend before my lover. You're important to me and I thought you wanted the same things, to have a good time. I can't and won't do love Natalie. I don't partake in cuddles, kisses and romantic gestures. I will never be a member of the sappy love society. The risks outweigh the benefits. This was about two friends that like to hang out, enjoying sex. I thought you needed the title so you didn't feel like a slut. I can be faithful to you physically, but emotionally I have nothing to give. Ever."

I sit, waiting for a string of curses, crying, but something other than silence. I hear a door close in the background. I hope she didn't say all that in front of a friend.

I'm starting to wonder if she is going to speak, when she finally barks out, "Don't you dare break up with me, Breyson. You may not see it now, but we're good together. I can give you what you need. I told you only so you would know how I feel, but I'll never mention it again until you feel the same. I wasn't looking for anything in return. I'll let you go for now, but text me later."

She really doesn't get it. I will never feel that way about her. You can't force yourself to feel that way about someone. It's there or it's not. To be honest, the thought of loving someone kind of freaks me out. With her it's just not there, but I'm mentally spent from this conversation. I'll have to deal with this when I get back home. For now, I need a drink. I need to forget; about this conversation, about Natalie, and about a certain blonde hair and green eyes. "Bye Natalie."

Feeling frustrated, I walk back inside, in search of Ryland. He has to be ready by now. To think, he had something to say about the time I spent in the shower is insane. The boy has changed clothes like ten times in the last thirty minutes. If I didn't know he had something swinging between his legs, I would think he was a girl. I don't even want to know what he does standing in the mirror that long. I've looked in like three different places already, with no Ryland in sight. "Rye, you ready?" I call out across the house. 

I finally find him sitting on the couch, putting on his Puma shoes. Looking up at me, he must sense my sudden change in mood. "Are you alright? You look a little pissed," he says leaning back against the couch, throwing his arms up on the backing.

I lean against the door frame, crossing my arms over my chest, because thinking about it again, I am a little pissed. "It's nothing, just dealing with some of Natalie's shit. I need to have some fun. You ready?"

He stands up and grabs his keys from the coffee table. "Yeah, let's go. I have just what you need."

The ride takes about fifteen minutes before we pull up to this huge house on the beach. We park across the street, because of all the cars already here. The stone driveway leads to a four car garage of a massive brick home. About halfway down, the driveway loops to the left, forming a circle drive that wraps around a large fountain. The steps lead to a high porch, covered in brown wicker furniture, in front of a large front door. Each corner is decorated with tall palms.

It's hard to imagine this is where someone lives, but then again several houses here are enormous. Houses like these put Mississippi mansions to shame. I open the door and step outside, as does Ryland. He starts up the walk and I just stand there staring.

When he notices I'm not right behind him, he turns toward me. "Are you coming? Logan's cool, his parties are usually packed. It shouldn't be hard to find something, or
someone
to get into," he says with a grin. It's only nine o'clock and from the cars parked everywhere I would say the place is already at maximum capacity. Well here goes. I hope I don't regret this.

Walking through the door, the place is packed from wall to wall and we haven't even made it out back. Music is blaring from speakers built into the ceiling corners of the room and a DJ is set up by the door. I'm assuming, that leads to the pool. Ryland said after a while, everyone usually ends up in the pool at the back of the house.

He nudges me in the arm, "You good? We'll go find the bar and then I may take off and find Presley in a little bit." He looks at me, a cocky smile spreading across his face.

Even if I was uncomfortable, I wouldn't admit it. I have never noticed him into a girl like this before. Plus, I've never really had a problem making friends before. I nod at him, "Yeah man. I'm cool. I'll find something to get into. Let's go find that bar."

We get to the bar and there is a guy running the keg. Ryland slaps his hand and looks back at me. "Logan, this is my boy Breyson. Show him a good time, yeah? He needs to see how Cali people party."

I look toward the guy and he extends his hand. "I'm Logan and this is my crib. I'll show you around and introduce you to some people. What's your beverage of choice?"

I shake his hand. Usually, I stick to beer, but today I need something stronger. "Have any whiskey?" I really hope he has something worth drinking. I can't do girly drinks.

A smirk lifts on one side of his face. "Ah, finally, someone ready for some real fun." He turns and places his hands around his mouth, to enhance the loudness of his voice and yells. "Who's ready for some games?" The crowd goes wild with excitement. What have I gotten myself into?

I turn to Ryland, who is looking around the room. I guess he's hunting that Presley girl. The boy has it bad. "Rye, what you want to drink?" He must spot her because he starts to move in the other direction.

"Just give me a Miller lite. Actually make it two." He reaches in his pocket and pulls out his keys handing them to me. "If you get ready to go, just head to the house. I doubt I'll be home tonight. I think Presley's parents are out of town for the weekend. I think I'm just going to crash there and I'll get a ride home in the morning. You cool with that?"

"Yeah man, I'm good. Just give me a call if you need a ride." He bumps his fist with mine and takes off in the direction of the pool. I turn back around and Logan has a table set up, pouring shots.

After three rounds of quarters, I'm slightly past the point of intoxication. I get up, cutting myself off, because I have to drive home. Quarters' is my favorite drinking game and I'm good at it so I never get very drunk. I walk into the living room, transformed into a dance floor. Upon entry, I see the back of a head covered in platinum blonde hair, grinding on some guy. Jealousy and rage course through my body. Before I can stop myself, I rush across the room and grab the girl's arm. When she looks at me with a look of disgust, I realize my mistake. I'm staring at a pair of hazel eyes. Meaning, it's not Kinzleigh. I don't even get the chance to apologize, when a fist connects with my jaw.

Stunned, I come to and realize everyone has stopped dancing. 
What in the hell is wrong with me?
This is completely out of character for my normal behavior. I've got to get out of here. If I can't control myself, I may be cutting this trip short as well. I stand and look at the girl, wide eyed, hidden behind the guy. Rubbing my hands over my face, I look at them. "Look, I'm really sorry. I'm a little drunk and thought she was someone else. I meant no disrespect."

The guy almost looks like he feels bad and the anger fades from his face. "It's cool man, but you may want to think twice before doing some shit like that again. You'll get yourself killed pulling something like that around here."

I nod my head in understanding. I deserved that hit, but I got to get out of here and clear my head. Only one place comes to mind. The one place that started it all...the beach, but I can't drive just yet. I'm not one of those idiots that get behind the wheel drunk. Too many people get killed over self-absorbed idiocy. My older cousin Beau was one of them. He went off to college and joined a fraternity. One night he got drunk and got a call from another frat brother that his girl was out with another guy. He was drunk and not thinking, so he took off after her and was speeding on a curvy road. He came around a curve going about sixty and wrapped his mustang around a tree. He was killed on impact and that was three years ago.

I take off not saying anything else. I head outside towards the pool to sober up a bit. There are several people in and around the pool. I'm not sure what I want to do until I can drive, but I'd rather be alone. I turn to head towards the front when I feel a tug on the band of my jeans, then a body plastered to my back, rubbing her arms up my torso. "Hey gorgeous. I remember you from earlier today at the beach."

I turn around and see a petite girl with short black hair and a tan. Apparently this girl lives in the tanning bed. She's cute, but not my type. She has now stuck herself against my front side wrapping her arms around my neck. I grab her hands, pulling them from around me. "I'm sorry, who are you?"

"You're too cute. I'm Lexi. I was with Presley and Kinzleigh at the beach this morning." Ah, Kinzleigh, exactly who I would rather be stuck to right now. "We could go upstairs. I can show you a good time, California style." She licks her lips and brushes her fingers down my stomach, stopping on my buckle, trying to unfasten my belt.
Whoa, not happening sweetie
, I think grabbing her hands and removing them.