Bearing My Soul: A Paranormal Werebear Shifter Romance (2 page)

I heard Tom object loudly from the back room, but couldn’t make out what he said.

“You’ve got more than enough time to help out a neighbor,” the old lady scolded back at him. Then, she gave me an apologetic smile.

She bagged up the meats in a separate sack, when her son burst angrily though the swinging doors. His glare softened. It was displaced entirely by a shocked expression, as he stared unabashedly at me. I fidgeted and pretended not to notice, as his eyes wandered over my face and loose curls. I sifted through my purse and wallet, hurrying to pay the bill and leave. I glanced up at him only once or twice to see his young face and big eyes framed by a shock of dark hair.

“I guess I could run a load of something or other up to the old Hall place, if she needed,” he offered, as casually as he could. His cracking voice betrayed his eagerness.

I tried to smile gratefully, but it came out more of a grimace. “That won’t be necessary,” I assured them both, as I laid out the bills for the food.

Tom helped me out to the car with the groceries. His mother propped herself in the store’s doorway. “Bill, across the street, sells flowers,” Margaret pointed.

I gazed over and a tall bald man waved to us with a friendly smile. His daughter, who was about nine years old, stood beside him and stared intently at me. Her dark brown hair tussled across her face in the breeze.

“And Jim, down the way, is a fantastic butcher, if you ever get a hankering for steaks or roasts.”

“Thank you,” I said, as graciously as I could manage. I felt awkward while her son opened my car door for me. “I really appreciate your help.”

“Anytime,” she shouted, as I started the car and waved farewell.

I watched the store fronts as I left town. I spotted an antique shop, a quaint coffee shop, and a little store that sold wood carvings of forest creatures. In one of the windows, the shop featured a giant carved bear. Its teeth were bared and vicious.

I pulled up at the house and unloaded the groceries. After I put things away, I peered cautiously out of the window and looked at the neighbor’s house. I bit nervously on my lower lip, but resolved to meet him. Bracing myself, I walked over to his porch and knocked. The sound echoed hollow inside. My legs felt incredibly weak. I wondered whether I knew what I was doing.

After a minute, I knocked again. Finally, I heard shuffling steps inside. I straightened my back and smiled, as the door swung open.

My eyes must have grown larger, as he peered out through the opening. His tall form towered over me. I had prepared something to say. It just wasn’t coming to me then. Two incredibly dark brown eyes, almost hidden beneath thick locks of delicious blond hair, stared directly at me.

“Hello?” he impatiently broke the silence.

My face grew hot. I wondered how long I stood there, staring back at him in total silence. “I…I…I’m…” I stammered, nodding my head over to the Hall house. “I’m over there,” I choked the words out. Then, I stopped to swallow back the rising terror that was shutting off my airways.

I glanced down at my clothes. I noticed holes in the knees of my jeans. I had the sudden urge to run and hide. “I mean…” I stopped. What did I mean?

He opened the door a little further. I peered into the dim corridor and saw him standing there, shirtless. His tight abs nestled hard and unashamed beneath a thick, chiseled chest. It, too, was covered in absolute gobs of rich, hazelnut-colored hair. I subdued the urge to sink my fingers into his chest hair. That’s all I could manage. Otherwise, I just stood there and tried not to stare at his chest.

“You’re the girl from next door,” he introduced me before I could. His voice was gruff and a bit condescending.

I was afraid I might have groaned. I did manage a short nod.

“Did you want to come in for a minute?” he begrudgingly offered.

I shook my head, but he didn’t seem to notice. I stepped quickly into the house, as he swung the door open.

It took my eyes a few minutes to adjust. The windows were covered in thick curtains, pulled tight to block the sunlight. The walls were dark. It felt cold and uninviting.

“Are you taking care of the old place?” the young man asked, as he led me into the parlor. He offered me a seat and I tumbled awkwardly into the recliner. I felt painfully out of place.

Again, I nodded and finally cleared my throat. “I’m taking care of the place for Mrs. Hall while she’s away. She’ll be back offering tours again in the spring.”

He grumbled beneath his breath. “Damn tourists,” he spat. “I wish they’d just leave us to ourselves.”

I fidgeted nervously, as I glanced out at the hall.

“Can I get you something to drink?” he offered. He tried to smile, sort of, but the growl in his voice said something else entirely.

“I probably shouldn’t stay,” I suggested. I stole a long glance at his stomach and chest again, in case it was the last chance I had.

“Just a soda, maybe,” he offered. “I’m guessing you’re still too young to drink alcohol.”

“Okay,” I said. My dry throat struggled with that simple word. I took a deep breath, as he stepped from the room. I cleared my brain and clambered to get control of myself. I managed to settle down before he returned.

“I’m Jonathan,” he grunted, as he handed me a fizzling glass. I was dismayed that he’d pulled on a shirt. His powerful biceps bulged and a pleasant skiff of dark blond hair covered his forearms.

“It is a pleasure to meet you,” I smiled. My heart skipped a beat and I struggled to remain calm. I focused on his dark eyes and his hypnotic gaze. I tried to keep my focus away from the muscles. I knew I could keep my cool, as long as he stayed dressed.

He stepped back and took a long sip of amber liquid from his glass. He watched me intently. I smiled, but twitched under his scrutiny.

“So,” he mused, as I took a long drink. The bubbles burned down my throat. “Is your name a secret or are you going to tell me?” he finally asked.

“Oh,” I blurted with embarrassment. Some soda spilled from my mouth and onto my lap.

Any semblance I had of being cool and in control was gone.

“I’m Andrea,” I said. I felt my face grow hot again, as I wiped uselessly at the wet spot on my leg.

He chuckled. “So what do you do at the Hall house, besides housesit?”

I looked down at my hands. “I just clean the place and do some yard work.”

“That’s quite the task,” he admitted. “I don’t envy you.”

I looked around the small parlor. “I don’t see any photos,” I noticed. “Do you live here with your wife and children?” I cringed in the middle of blurting it out. Even I could hear how nakedly obvious it sounded.

He managed an amused grin. It seemed to be at my expense. “No, I live here alone.”

“I see,” I muttered. “What do you do?”

He shrugged. “I help out in town, when needed. I get by fine, as you can see.”

I nodded. I watched as he sat calmly across from me. “So how is it going for you over there?” he asked. “Are you handling the place okay on your own?”

“It’s great,” I even surprised myself at how exuberant I sounded.

“Really?” he raised an eyebrow. “You seemed to be having a tough time with those trees.”

I blushed hotly. “You were watching me?” I gasped.

He nodded. His face was still serious. “It was hard to miss.”

I gazed at my own feet for a long moment. “Actually, I honestly don’t have any idea what I’m doing. I don’t even know how to build a fire in the fireplace.” I looked up at him. His dark eyes still loomed distant and cool. “I’ve never done anything like this before.”

He shrugged. “You’ll catch on,” he assured me.

I desperately wanted to ask for help, but didn’t have the nerve. After a long, awkward silence, I took a gulp of my soda.

“I should get back,” I said, as I stood clumsily to my feet. “I need to get up early and figure out how to get those trees in the ground.”

He stood up with an indifferent half grin and led me into the hall.

I reached out my hand and had to catch my breath unexpectedly as he grasped it. I held tight a little longer than I should have. My hand was almost lost in his. As if by instinct, I pulled him a little closer. His scent washed over me. I breathed him in eagerly. “Could I maybe ask you to help me out sometimes?” I asked, as I turned away and forced myself out the front door. I even surprised myself that I found the courage to ask. “Not that I’d want to bother you, I mean... just if I really need something?”

He grunted with a nod and I accepted that as a “yes.” I quickly soaked in the image of his luscious hair, his piercing eyes, and the rough stubble on his face. For some reason, it sent excited chills through me. “Goodnight,” I whispered. He waved and shut the door.

CHAPTER TWO

I hurried back home and made a grilled cheese sandwich for dinner. His face lingered in my memory, as did his strong arms, rock-hard chest and abs, and intoxicating aroma. I wondered, as my sandwich toasted in the iron pan, what it would be like to cuddle into him on the sofa. How would his arms feel wrapped around me, pulling me up against his body?

I built a fire before eating. I used the fire starter logs again. He had suddenly become an insistent distraction for me. A longing warmth grew low in my gut. I finished my sandwich and turned down the lights, leaving the room lost in shadows. I ran a warm hand beneath my shirt and over my breasts. I imagined Jonathan was touching me. I tickled the nipples, slowly, softly. I bit at my bottom lip until I knew it was too late for me to turn back.

Covering myself with a blanket, I unfastened my jeans and slipped a hand underneath. I held the memory of him tightly in my mind. My fingers found their mark and I convulsed in swirling pleasures. My eyes closed tightly, as I thought of his face. His arms grasped me with desperate need. I distantly wondered if he were watching me just then, peering in through a window.

I gasped for breath, grateful to have the tension eased. Then, reality forced its way back over me. The solitude still lingered and I still sat alone. I stroked my lips lightly and wiped at a stray tear.

At last, I fastened my pants and went into the kitchen. I rinsed my plate and cinched up the garbage bag. As I hauled it to the outside trash, I stopped in horrified panic.

The garbage can wiggled and churned with something inside. I screamed and raced back into the house, slamming the door behind me.

“Oh my god,” I breathed. “What the hell was that?”

Cautiously, I peered out the window; but, I couldn’t see anything. I made my way back into the main room and looked out into the large backyard. The moonlight swept past the trees and into the yard. I shook as I watched, but nothing moved. The night was quiet and motionless.

I squelched a scream, as a giant bear suddenly lumbered past the window. It was no more than a few feet from where I was. I could hear it snort in ferocious discontent. It stopped. Its back was to me. Then, it stood upright on its hind legs.

The bear towered several feet over my head. It reached with huge claws upward to the night sky. Its low growl filled the wind and I was instantly aware that no more than a thin pane of glass stood between me and the killer animal.

I slumped to the floor in horror and confusion. Then, I slid as quietly and quickly as I could to the stairs. At last, I clambered up to the second floor, too terrified to look back. I locked myself in the master bedroom. Tears streamed down my face and I listened.

I heard nothing. The night was quiet once again. I hurried beneath the bedcovers, hid there, and waited. The night dragged on endlessly. I must have dozed because I awoke to the morning sunlight bewildered and confused.

The curtains were open wide. I crept to the window to peer out. In relief, I realized the bear was likely long gone. It was unaware that I was hiding in the house. I shivered at the chilling recollection, as I stared into the backyard.

I was dumbfounded. The bear was nowhere to be seen, but all three trees were planted. They were carefully set and watered, just as I had been instructed to do. My jaw dropped. I could only stare in amazement.

I noticed Jonathan strolling toward his house. He came from a trail that led deep into the woods. I smiled in spite of myself. He was shirtless. His tan skin glinted in the sunlight with perspiration. As he waded through waist-high grass, his strong arms swayed casually with pure content. I watched breathlessly. I felt slightly ashamed at how eager I was to see his chest and abs as he...

I yelped and dropped immediately to the floor with my hand over my mouth. My face was hot with humiliation. He had strolled casually through the tall grasses and had finally made his way onto his back lawn. He was shirtless, but he didn’t have any pants on either. I had just seen Jonathan wandering outside, completely naked. His tight butt cheeks undulated as he walked. I also caught a brief glimpse of his bulging manhood. His impressive length swayed back and forth with each step. The image of his thick, loose shaft, the round dark tip, and his large gonads was burned into my brain. I was mortified.

In shock, I stumbled down the stairs. I tried to clear my mind of what I had just seen. I popped some bread in the toaster for breakfast and decided not to bother building a fire. The cold felt oddly comforting that morning.

I ate the toast slowly. I wanted to give Jonathan plenty of time to get dressed. Then, I slipped into the bedroom, showered, climbed into clothes without holes in them, and went next door.

I rapped hard on the front door. I tried to steel myself against the memory of seeing him... naked. We were both adults. I knew we could ignore what had just happened.

He didn’t answer, so I knocked again, a little louder. He finally yanked the door open. I disregarded his obvious irritation. I was relieved to see he was fully dressed.

“What?” he groaned.

“Do you have a gun?” I asked. I glanced involuntarily down and up the length of his body. He even looked good in worn canvas cargo pants and a thick pullover sweater. He looked cuddly.

His irritated glare turned into a puzzled stare. “What?” he yelled. “No, I don’t have a gun. What the hell do you want a gun for?”

“Can I come in?” I begged, as I looked around nervously.

“Not really a good time, Andrea. What’s up?”

I groaned anxiously. “I saw a bear,” I whimpered. I held my breath, as I gave him time to let the words sink in. I watched his face. It was expressionless, as he stared back at me.

“And...?”

“What do you mean ‘and?’” I gasped. “There was a huge bear in my backyard last night, Jonathan!” I loved how his name rolled from my tongue. I mentally kicked myself for enjoying it. “It was less than three yards from the house! What if it busts in?”

“For what?” he chuckled. “Do you think it wants to sit and watch television with you?”

I stared at him for a long moment, stunned by his reaction. Then, I went quiet with anger. He was mocking me, making fun of me being hunted by a giant bear. The irritation dredged up an odd excitement.

He swung the door open a bit further and gave me an intense glare. “And what’s the gun for?”

“There is a bear wandering around the house at night!” I yelled. “We need to kill it before it kills me!”

He grumbled and his face turned dark. “You’re just going to kill whatever you don’t want to see in your backyard?” he bit. “You come here from your cozy little house in the city where you’ve run all the wild creatures out and now you want to shoot them?”

“And there was something in the garbage cans last night, too,” I went on. “There was something hiding in there. But...  probably not the bear.”

He grunted rudely. “Keep the lids on tight or the ‘coons get in there. If they’ve spread trash around, you’d better clean it up. Now, I think it would be best if you simply left.”

He slammed the door hard enough to make the windows rattle. I stood in confusion for a moment. Then, I stomped back to the house, furious at his disdain. I wondered if I could get a gun in town, but I also knew I could never actually shoot one.

Resigned, I spent the morning vacuuming and dusting. Then, I began to scrub the baseboards. Finally, I found some gardening gloves and took a hoe to the weeds still dying in the old flower beds. I hacked mercilessly at them. I half-hoped to see that bear again, so I could hit it with the hoe. The other half of me really hoped I didn’t.

Mrs. Hall had a large load of firewood delivered. Unfortunately, the impatient and ill-tempered driver left it all in the front yard. I started carrying a couple of pieces at a time around back to the wood shed, but it was taking forever. Next, I tried loading up the wheelbarrow, teetering around the house with each load. That helped, but I found if I loaded more than a few logs the thing toppled over on me. When I fell and scraped my knee, I gave up and went in to bandage it.

I made my way back into town. I didn’t notice a gun shop along the main street. At last, I dropped into the coffee house for a hot latte. Hopefully, it would help shake off the mid-autumn chill.

“There was a bear in my yard last night,” I blurted out, as I sipped the steaming hot sweetness. The barista gave me little more than a half-smile and went back to sweeping the floor. “The monster came within a few feet of the house,” I went on, hoping to strike up some useful conversation or possibly some sympathy. The coffee house was empty except for me and the barista, but the young man didn’t seem to want to talk.

I went back to my coffee, frustrated at the apparent lack of concern for my wellbeing. The bell over the door rang out as a middle-aged man barged in from the cold.

“Hey Rick,” he called out. The barista returned a cheerful greeting. The room went deathly still. I turned to see the middle-aged man staring at me, his brow deeply furrowed.

“Hey, you know what, I’ll be back in a bit, okay?” he waved to Rick, as he turned to leave.

I felt the sharp pang of rejection. My jaw fell open in disbelief.

“Hold on, Tom,” Rick grabbed the man’s arm with a friendly grasp. “I think the lady was just on her way out anyway.”

The two of them stared me down. I shrugged weakly. “Actually, I just got here and...” Their glares sharpened. “I suppose I don’t need coffee,” I submitted and slipped quietly from the shop. Confused, I stepped into the general store. I smiled at Margaret as I walked in.

Her face fell as she saw me. I walked quickly down one of the aisles, but couldn’t shake the feel of her gaze on my back. At last, I came up to the counter.

“Yes?” she barked curtly. “What?”

I swallowed back the lump in my throat and shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess. I suppose I was just browsing.”

“If you’re not buying something, you need to get out,” she snapped.

I hurried out the door and into the cold once more. I clambered into my car and sped back to the house. Frustrated, I suddenly realized the entire town was shunning me. I curled up on the sofa and stared at a cold hearth. I was actually contemplating going back home.

I knew I never could. I was stuck where I was. I had left a home full of contempt and anger. Now, I was somewhere else, but I was unwelcome and unwanted. There was nowhere else for me to go.

I buried my face in my knees and let the tears flow. As the sun drifted down along the western sky, I made up a cup of tea and wandered into the backyard.

Jonathan was behind his house, digging in the soil. I felt a tinge of disappointment that he wore a shirt, but despondently watched him work for a while. I noticed how he shoved the shovel blade down with his foot, burying it fully in the ground with each scoop. I grimaced as I realized how stupid I must have looked trying to jab it into the earth like a spear.

“Hey!” I called out to him. I stepped off the porch and over to the fence line. He looked up at me, startled at first, then bitter. He turned back to his work.

“I don’t suppose you know anything about the trees getting planted back here?” I smiled, hoping to at least get him to grumble thoughtfully at me.

“No,” he grunted. “And I’d just as soon keep it that way, lady.”

I stepped back, stunned. “Lady?” I breathed. He didn’t respond. He turned to see me still watching him. The hurt was evident on my face. He grunted, slammed the shovel to the ground, and stormed into his house.

A dull pain filled my stomach. I was surprised to sense a horrid loss, as he turned from me and left me standing alone outside. Stinging tears again filled my eyes and I crept back into my own house.

My cell rang. I pulled it absently from my pocket. “Andrea,” I choked in a half-sob.

“Hey, sis,” Tammy’s voice was tired. “What are you up to today?”