Dangerous Joy (44 page)

Felicity stroked the black fur. "She saved me once...I think."

The maid arrived then, and Beth left. Felicity prepared for bed, feeling she should finally be at peace. Instead, she was tormented by the look in Rupert's eyes when he'd said, "You'll never have Kieran."

What might Rupert do to enforce the statement?

The next morning, however, Felicity's fears seemed irrational, a product of shock and exhaustion. She settled to playing the piano until a footman interrupted to say that Mr-Cavanagh required her presence in the rose reception room.

She accompanied the man, wondering why Miles hadn't just come directly to her. When she entered the room, however, she found him entertaining a solid, middle-aged man with grizzled side-whiskers.

Felicity had to choke back a cry of alarm when she recognized Kathleen's cousin, Michael Craig. So soon, Rupert's prediction had proved true.

She managed to greet the man politely, then took a seat, heart racing with alarm. Miles wore a bland look that she couldn't interpret. Mr. Craig was scowling, but then that was always the case.

"Felicity," said Miles, casually crossing one leg over the other, "Mr. Craig has posted down to London with some extraordinary matters to discuss..."

He knows!

"...and I wanted you to be present."

"Foolishness to involve a woman," snapped Mr. Craig. "But if you insist. Miss Monahan, I recently received a letter from Kathleen's husband, a man I do not hesitate to say that I despise. However, he seemed most sincere in his concern that you plan to steal his child. That you have, in fact, already succeeded in removing the boy from his home."

Felicity summoned up a blank look. "Steal? Why would I want to steal Kieran?"

Could Rupert actually have told him the truth?

The man pushed out his bottom lip. "He says you have an unhealthy obsession with the boy. You can't deny you've spent plenty of time with him. Kathleen remarked on it."

Felicity's heart-rate settled a little. "I liked Kathleen, and I like Kieran. On her deathbed, she asked me to keep an eye on her son. You can't deny, Mr. Craig, that Mr. Dunsmore is not an ideal father."

"True, true. But that is precisely my concern, Miss Monahan. Knowing as I do how little dependence may be placed on Mr. Dunsmore, I have to take an interest myself in the poor lad. What are you up to?"

Felicity flicked a look at Miles, but he was still bland. Was Mr. Craig's concern genuine, or was he mainly interested in a juicy estate?

"I'm not up to anything, Mr. Craig. The honest truth is that Mr. Dunsmore is inclined to take his ill-humor out on his child. Since Kathleen's death, he's fallen into debt, and his attempts to squeeze more money out of his tenants have angered the local people. He's become quite cruel. When Mr. Cavanagh's mother offered to have the boy visit her, I thought it would be a welcome respite."

Michael Craig rubbed his square jaw. "I doubt he is a kind father. But the boy cannot be kept out of his hands forever. I did offer to take the lad into my own household, but he refused."

And what would have happened to a child who stood between you and an inheritance?

"As to that, Mr. Craig, there is a possibility that Kieran will remain in the charge of the Earl of Kilgoran. Mr. Dunsmore has no real interest in his son and has agreed that such an arrangement would be suitable."

Michael Craig flashed a penetrating look between Felicity and Miles. To Miles, he said, "And you, I hear, are the heir to Kilgoran."

"For my sins."

"Humph!" He rose to his feet. "I sense all kinds of goings on," but I'm willing to believe you are trying to do your best for the boy. My children are grown and I've no desire to have a young one about anymore. But I give you fair warning," he said, scowling at both of them, "that I will have an eye on the welfare of my cousin's child. It was I who hired Mrs. Edey, you know."

"No," said Felicity. "I didn't. She's an excellent woman."

"Indeed she is. I checked her references most closely. That Dunsmore was apparently going to leave the boy in the care of servants. I hope you intend to keep her on."

"Oh, yes."

"Good." He scowled even more ferociously. "Tell her to write to me. Regularly! The boy will not be undefended."

The man's concern was genuine! Ashamed of her suspicions, Felicity smiled at him. "Mr. Craig, I think Kieran is most fortunate to have you as his relative."

"Ah, well," the man muttered uneasily, "as to that, I wonder if I should have done more. But a father's rights, you know. A father's rights..."

"I do understand. But since Mr. Dunsmore has willingly given up his rights, we can all be easy about it."

Mr. Craig nodded. "I hope so. And if young Kieran has need of anything...my finances are not at their best just now-a ship gone down and some damned malcontents damaging my manufactory-but I still have enough to help my family. He should not be beholden to strangers."

"We'll remember that."

But as Felicity said farewell to the man, a splinter of unease fretted her.

When Mr. Craig had left, Miles said, "Extraordinary. Behind that grim exterior beats quite a warm heart."

"Kathleen was just like that." Felicity wondered if she should tell Miles about her concern, but she needed to think about it first.

She thought about it throughout the day, and even through a most entertaining visit to Astley's Ampitheatre.

No amount of thinking could change her mind, however, and that night she pulled on her wrap and slipped down the corridor to Miles's room.

He was in bed, but reading by the light of a candle.

He slept naked.

"What is it?" he asked warily. "I'm in no state to get out of bed."

Felicity wanted nothing more than to slip into bed beside him, but she kept her distance. "Don't worry. I've not come to assault your virtue. I have something I need to talk about."

He put his book aside. "Pass me my banjan and I won't have to offend your modesty."

She laughed as she tossed it over. "It'd be no offense, just temptation, as well you know."

He slipped out of bed and into the garment decently enough and directed her to the two chairs on either side of the glowing fire. When they were seated, it was as safe a situation as it could ever be when they were alone together, never mind half-naked in a bedroom...

She shivered with desire but firmly tamped it down.

"Now, a muirnin," he prompted, "what is it?"

She stared at the glowing coals, not sure how to put her disquiet into words. "I can't feel it's right to seek happiness through lies and theft."

"There are such things as white lies, you know. Ones that lead to good, not evil."

"True..."

"Telling the truth about what happened all those years ago would only hurt you and Kieran. It would help no one."

"It would draw Rupert's teeth. He could tell all in spite."

"He'd be mad."

"Sometimes he is mad. But there's another side to this."

"Yes?"

"Michael Craig."

"I thought today's visit would reassure you."

"It did, in a way, but it also disturbed me. Don't you realize? By right, he should have Loughcarrick. That's what I meant by theft. By this deception, we are stealing the property from him, property it's clear he needs. It can't be right."

Miles rested his head back to think, and the firelight glimmered on neck and jaw in a way that could almost distract her from her purpose.

She broke the silence. "I think we have to tell the truth, lance this ancient wound and let the poison run free. That's the only way we can start our life together in honesty."

He lowered his eyes to look at her, smiling slightly. "Our life together. I like the sound of that. But it won't be easy."

"I know."

"You'll be exposed to a great deal of unpleasant attention."

"I know."

"Kieran will be labeled a bastard and a child of scandal."

She gripped her hands together. "I know."

He rose and pulled her to her feet. "The cockeyed honor of a wild patriot-boy. I knew from the first you'd give me trouble."

"You were certainly right."

"How dense of me not to immediately know you'd bring me such joy."

His kiss was almost reverent, but did not lack passion. Felicity returned it in the same spirit. She intended no assault at all, but then-without thought-her hands slipped around him beneath his robe, so he was naked to her, his need apparent...

He held her breathlessly close for a long moment, then moved away, retying his banjan. "Two weeks until your birthday."

She found the strength to match his level tone. "I think I'll quite miss having such a stalwart guardian."

"No, you won't," he said absolutely, leading her to the door. "In fact, I'm setting you free now. It's never sat easy with me to override your will, and since you clearly are not going to give yourself to Dunsmore, there's no more reason to. Whether the truth is told or not is your business, both on your behalf and on Kieran's. I'll help and support you, but I won't force your actions in any way."

Felicity hugged herself. "I feel strangely naked."

He laughed. "Don't put such ideas into my already-weakened brain. You're free. But let's see if we can't think of some way short of public revelation."

Knowing better than to touch him, no matter how much she longed to, Felicity simply said, "I do love you, you know. More than I ever felt it possible to love another adult. It's a disconcerting, weakening kind of emotion, isn't it?"

"Very. Particularly the weakening bit. You are going to marry me on your birthday, aren't you?"

"Do you insist on marriage before giving in to weakness then?"

His eyes were dark with desire. "I'll soon not be in a state to insist upon anything."

"I feel like a mare in heat, and you're behaving very like a stallion." She turned suddenly to hide her face against the cool door. "We're mad!"

He trapped her there with his body, big, hard, hot, his hands over hers. "We should never have let the passion run free that day in the billiard room. There's sense behind chaperoning after all. I'd better remind Beth of it, or one day I'll cover you with as little thought..."

His hips moved against hers, then with a curse, he pushed away to stand at bay on the far side of the room. "No more times alone together, Felicity. None."

She ached for what he wanted but knew he was right.

"I never thought to look forward to a birthday quite this much," she said, and left him in peace.

Miles spent most of the next day safely out of the house arranging for Rupert's money and its manner of payment. The Rogues had put a watch on the weasel, and it seemed he was staying in his hole nursing his wounds.

Felicity enjoyed the sight of the Rogues in less violent action, easing Serena Middlethorpe into the haut ton with hardly a ripple. At the same time, however, she struggled for a way out of her moral dilemma.

She would accept any cost to herself, but she" hesitated to tell the truth when both Miles and Kieran would suffer from it.

On the other hand, she felt deeply that nothing could prosper based on the outright dishonesty of depriving Michael Craig of the estate that was legally his.

All day, Felicity's mind went round and round the problem like a turn-spit dog. Then, it threw up a solution.

Chapter Twenty-five

The next day, she invited Miles to talk with her in the safety of a stroll around Marlborough Square. Relative safety, anyway. She couldn't be sure they wouldn't scandalize the area by making passionate love next to the duck pond in the center.

"I'm not one for absolute morality," she said, pacing along the flagstones beside her beloved. "That simply, the only real injustice is that Michael Craig should have the estate."

"True enough."

"As a Liverpool merchant, he may not want the trouble of an Irish property. What if we were to offer him the value of it if he'll give up any claim in favor of Kieran? Legally speaking, right would not have been done, but in a purely moral sense..."

Miles looked at Felicity. "Clever. But it can't be done without telling Craig everything."

"I know. But he's sufficiently like Kathleen that I trust him. If I'm wrong, well..."

"If you're wrong, he'll make the whole thing public`

Felicity stared rather fixedly at the first yellow blooms on a forsythia poking through the railings around the central garden. "Which could well mean your uncle would forbid our marriage."

"Kilgoran has no power to forbid me anything."

She risked a look at him. "It will make it difficult, though."

He grinned. "With you, I'm used to difficult."

Felicity made a sound of annoyance. "I do wish you'd take this seriously!"

"Why? It seems you can't kill, lie, or steal. It makes you a poor Rogue, but as your future husband, I approve. I hope Mr. Craig is willing to go along with your plan because it will be much more comfortable for you and Kieran. It makes little difference to me, however."