dontjudge06242014aRe (2 page)

The distinctive smell of Quorum cologne mixed with his
personal scent was delicious, and the hint of it permeated my nostrils as I
soaked him up.  His curly brown hair brushed my cheek, and I inhaled deeply as
his continued assault on my senses rendered me helpless.  Goosebumps shot down
my spine as his tongue flashed out and left a cool trail up my neck and under
my jaw.  Instinctively I opened myself to him, both physically and emotionally,
and anxiety gave way to excitement as I wanted to feel him merge with me. 
Beads of perspiration formed on my temples, a mere byproduct of fanning the flames
of desire I now held for him.

And just as quickly he released me, shoving another small
blue card into my hand as he disappeared back into the crowd.  It was at that
moment I realized I was panting; rapid shallow breaths that brought no relief. 
I held the card to my nose, checking for remnants of his presence.  My eyes
closed instinctively as I inhaled him once again.

It took several moments to gather myself before I felt the
confidence to cross the bar.  Out the door I made quick steps to my car and slammed
the door, making sure to lock it twice before cranking my car.

I sank my toes into the fuzzy bunny slippers that were well
worn and way past their useful life as I headed to the kitchen for my morning
coffee.  I can already here Melanie’s stupid little laugh and knowing she
couldn’t see me my eyes instinctively roll back in my head.  I know I should be
happy for them, but my jealousy won’t allow it.  Their conversation comes to an
abrupt halt as I enter the room, a sure sign that I’m the topic of
conversation.

“Who’s Doctor Graham?” Melanie taunts as I round the counter
top.

“No one,” I replied, ignoring her attempts to bait me into a
session of ‘let’s pick on the weird girl.’

“C’mon, Elizabeth, give us the dirty details.”  Both she and
David are doing their best to control their giggling, but I’m not buying it.

I wouldn’t waste the energy trying to hide my true
feelings.  “Don’t go through my things!” I snap at them.

“It fell out of your purse, Elizabeth.  Honest.”

Doubtful, but honestly I didn’t care what these two immature
idiots thought.  I snatched the card from Melanie’s hand.  “Don’t you two have
somewhere to be?”

I hated to be a bitch, and most of the time I just didn’t
have the courage to be so, but I feel like I have one nerve left and these two
are leaning all over it.  I stared them both down, daring them to say another
word.

Sliding her own purse noisily across the counter she let out
an audible ‘hmpf,’ but nothing more.  David, on the other hand, was already
tiptoeing in full retreat towards the front door, obviously wanting none of my
ire on a Friday morning.

Once the door closed I picked up the card and held it to my
nose.  I could smell his cologne, immediately flooding my senses as every hair
on my neck seemed to stand up straight.  The memory of last night’s encounter flashed
a sense of awareness, and my nipples hardened to the point of aching.

Flipping the card over I saw his note for the first time.

If you’re really
interested, have dinner with me.  1321 Calendar Road.  Park and meet me at the
front door at 7:30
P.M
.  - Graham

*-*-*-*-*

I’d passed this place a million times, and not once did I
realize it was a club.  In fact, the empty parking lot in front of the old
wooden building had every appearance of abandonment, at least during the day. 
But tonight, well that was a different story.  Embarrassment is the best way to
describe the feeling I have as I pull my broken down little Toyota into the
parking lot amongst all the expensive cars there.  I found a spot, about three
spaces down from the good doctor’s and quickly exited my car trying to put as
much distance between me and my ride.  Graham extended his arm like a
gentleman, and escorted me proudly inside.

The owners of the exclusive club have obviously spared no
expense, and the elegant room looks a lot like a five star restaurant.  I fully
expected to see bodies everywhere, people in various stages of dress, but I
never thought I’d feel woefully underdressed.  The soft jazz music is a far cry
from the local bar, and Graham orders a simple appetizer with champagne as he
guides me to an empty table.

“So Elizabeth, what do you think?” he asked proudly.

“Well… it’s not exactly what I expected.”

“How so?”

“You sure this is a BDSM club?”  I know I should appreciate
the surroundings, but I’m sure my skepticism is showing through.

With a confident grin he leans back into his chair.  “We
like to keep our slaves bound and gagged in the back.  After all, appearances
must be maintained.”

“Bound and gagged?”

“For some.  Really kind of depends on your preference.”  I
feel like he’s mocking me as his head shakes slightly.  “But the beatings are
fairly regular.”  Again he chuckles, and I can’t help but join in his laughter.

His demeanor takes on a more serious look as he sits up
straight and lifts his glass of champagne.  “Why are you so interested in this
lifestyle?”

“Hmmm, I don’t know.  I guess I’m just looking for
something, you know, different.”

“And you thought you’d find your answers at the meet and
greet?”

Sampling the champagne I feel myself relaxing at the bubbles
tickle my nose.  “I don’t know, maybe.  But I have to say they seem rather…”

“Amatuerish?”

“Right.  But who am I to say?  I mean they kept talking
about how it wasn’t about sexual gratification, but let’s face it, isn’t that what
it should be about?”

“I think the group spends a lot of time about the pure
mechanics of it, not the emotions.  For some of those people, I think they
appreciate and celebrate the pain more than the pleasure.”

“And this place is different?”

“Our approach is different.”

He finishes his glass of champagne, and before he can return
it to the table a young woman refills it without being asked.  I appreciate the
attentive staff, and it doesn’t escape me the provocative but simple dress
she’s wearing:  Tight, low cut, and plain.  Graham looks as if he’s sitting on
a big surprise, and my inquisitive nature can’t help but want to know more.

“How exactly is it different?”

With a deep breath his eyes cut away from me, and turn
towards our waitress.  “Let’s just say this is more about having your needs
met.  It’s not as much about power and control as it is about exploring and
fulfilling your desires.”

“My desires?  I’m not even sure what my desires are?”

“Well, it’s a journey of sorts.  Some people know exactly what
they want.  Others, well let’s just say they have to be exposed to many things
before they get it.”

“What sort of things?”

His thick fingers twist the bottom of the fluted glass in
front of me.  “Some people want to serve, some want to be used, some want to be
controlled.  For some it’s completely about giving up responsibility for their
pleasure.”

“Interesting concept, but I’m not sure I want to be used.”

“Careful, Elizabeth, the one thing that crazy group at the
meet and greet really understand is that you shouldn’t judge.  Patience and
understanding are just a part of acceptance.”

“And for you?”

“Well, let’s just say I enjoy dominating.”

“So you’re a dom?  You spank and tie up your victims, force
them to…”

“Hold on!” He says sharply, “Not so fast.  I like to think
my approach is much different than that.”

“How so?”

He drains his glass once again, and just like before the
young lady steps in and fills his glass.  With a heavy sigh he stares directly
into my eyes.  I feel I’m open, vulnerable, and my anxiety is difficult to
hide.  Yet somewhere in his sparking eyes I feel comfort.  His tone is
soothing, but his question is very direct.  “Have you ever been bound?”

I laughed audibly in an effort to mask my inexperience. 
“No.”

“Spanked?”

“No.”

“Forced to bare your true desires?”

“True desires?” I chuckled again.

“Yes.  What you really fantasize about.”

“I don’t really fantasize?”

“You don’t?  Hmm, odd.”

“You don’t believe me?” I asked, showing the most confident
smile I can muster.

“No I don’t.  In fact, I believe everyone fantasizes,
especially when they masturbate.”

I feel my face flush just hearing the word, and as if my
only friend at the table is my glass of champagne I swallow the last drops,
holding the glass to my lips for as long as I can.  As I place my glass on the
table in front of me the young woman leans over and refills.  Her ample
cleavage is now squarely in my field of view, and I admit openly I stared at
them.  Her nipples were straining against the thin fabric, and as I licked my
lips I feel the heat rising up my neck.

“Don’t you?”

“What?  Fantasize?”

His eyes are locked on mine, and as much as I want to turn
away I just can’t.  I can’t avoid it.  Inside I want to feel strong, confident,
but even as the words escape my lips they seem shaky at best.  “Sometimes.” 
All of a sudden a rush of joy swells up through my chest, and I’m proud that I
said it.

“So what is it?” he asked coolly.

“What?”

“Your fantasy?”

“I don’t know.”

“I see,” he says as he leans back into his chair.  I feel
I’ve disappointed him, and I don’t even know why that would matter anyway.

Perhaps I wanted to feel the experienced hand of guidance. 
Perhaps I really just don’t know.  I sense he feels bringing me here was a
mistake, and the thought of sexual journey flashes through my head.  I perk up,
trying once again to gain his attention.  “Why did you approach me?”

“Beg your pardon?” he asked with a quizzical look on his
face.

“Why’d you stop me in bar?  What is it that you want me to
see?”

“I wanted you to know that there is a real choice in this
lifestyle, and we’re all not a bunch of perverts who can’t seem to separate the
real world from fantasy.”

“And that’s what they do at the meet and greet?”

He shakes his head no, but I sense he does believe it. 
“It’s just that the majority of those people dive into the lifestyle
twenty-four/seven, and quite frankly that’s not reality.  I believe for most of
them it’s about shock and awe, and diving into something that’s not a temporary
escape, but a true path of avoidance.”

His words seem very clinical, and I suppose from a doctor I
should expect that, but he is beginning to make a lot of sense.  I also got the
feeling that some of the people at the meet and greet were not completely in
touch with reality.  “And your approach is different… how?”

As he places both hands on the table I feel he’s about to
let me in on the ‘big secret’ of this place, and I’m listening intently.  “This
is a place where people experience their fantasies, and for some it’s a
liberating experience.  For a lot of people they simply sit on the sidelines
and enjoy the show, but for some it’s about the power of release.”

“Release?”

“Letting go.  Trusting in someone else.  Being able to set
aside the demands of daily responsibilities and immerse themselves into a few
hours of pleasure.”

“Sounds wonderful, but how does being tied and spanked
accomplish that?”

“You’ll have to experience it before you can determine that
for yourself.”  He stood abruptly, extending his hand out to me.  “Let me show
you.”  I’m not sure where this is heading, but without much thought I took his
hand, and he once again escorted me to the rear of the building.

Approaching the door I could hear the faint sounds of
cheering and laughter.  Graham pulled me aside and wrapped his hand around my
waist.  “Before we go in, I simply ask that you do one thing.  Don’t judge.” 
With that said he opened the door.

The large back room was decorated like some kind of English
manor, and fine furniture was meticulously placed around the room creating
several different spaces for people to gather and chat.  Graham seems to be in
his element, and several couples greeted us as he paraded me around the room,
all dressed to the nines.

“Elizabeth, this is Don and his lovely wife Amanda.”

Don nodded his head as his wife extended her hand, covered
in diamonds, to greet me.  “Nice to meet you, Elizabeth.”  Before I could even
respond a waitress approached us carrying a tray with more champagne.  She was
completely nude, except for a thick leather choker with two tiny chains that
connected the metal ring under her chin to each nipple.  It looked somewhat
painful, but from the permanent smile plastered upon her face I gathered she
rather enjoyed it.  I was confounded that the couple in front of me didn’t even
seem to notice her presence past the point of supplying fresh drinks.  “First
time?”

I nodded, still unable to speak as I tore my eyes away from
the waitress back to Amanda.

Amanda’s hand drifted to my elbow, and a gentle but
reassuring squeeze seems to calm me immediately.  She leans over into me and
whispers.  “You’re in for a treat tonight.  I hope you enjoy yourself.”

I look around the room and see exactly what I thought I’d
see.  Couples and groups engaged in various forms of sex and submission.  To
the right I saw a woman on her hands and knees, with a gorgeous young man
standing over her with a whip.  Her ass was already bright red, yet the sounds
of sweet of satisfaction flowed from her lips as he continued to strike her. 
On the couch just behind Amanda was a woman with her wrists and ankles bound
and high in the air while another woman greedily licked between her legs. 
Behind her was a man buried deep within her.  All the while Amanda, Don and Graham
acted as if it wasn’t taking place.

I have that deer in the headlights look plastered upon my
face, and I think the three of them took a tremendous amount of pride in my
naivety.

“See something you like?” Graham asked.

Wow.  Talk about information overload.  I squeezed his arm
tightly, and stared into his eyes searching for some kind of handle to grab
hold of.  “I…”

“It’s a little overwhelming… right?”  He turned to Don and
Amanda, “Excuse us, please.”

I followed him blindly, still scanning the room with
amazement as I watched full blown acts of sex playing out right in front of me
as he guided me to a secluded corner of the room.  There he helped me down onto
a couch for me to gather my bearings.  He took my drink and placed it on the
coffee table with his.  “You okay?”

“Yeah… just a lot to process.  I can’t believe all these
people.”

“Remember, don’t judge.  For most it’s about a journey of
sexual exploration.”

I laughed, shaking my head from side to side.  I could never
do all that in front of other people.  I feel like they’re all staring at me.”

“Tell you what.  Why don’t we start with something simple.”