Dragon Sword and Wind Child (11 page)

“I thought I told you to remember that this was your own choice,” said Torihiko, laughing. Not knowing how to reply to that, she crouched down and looked at him crossly.

“It's all right, Saya. You don't have to do a thing. It's even all right if you love Prince Tsukishiro. You still won't give me away, right?”

She turned away primly. “Don't be so sure. I'm a member of the palace now. Who knows what I will do . . .”

“Are you really happy here, as a handmaiden?” Torihiko asked, his voice suddenly filled with unexpected concern. Once again Saya was unable to reply. Before she could stop them, tears began to flow and she cursed herself, wishing she could do something about this new habit.

Torihiko watched her silently while she struggled to control her weeping, and then said calmly, “Let me speak as a physician, Lady Blue: the primary cause of your melancholy is that for far too long you have lacked contact with the earth, with water, with green and growing plants. You're not the kind of person who can live apart from these things. Like a wild bird in a cage, you will lose the will to live. You have to get outside.”

“Yes.” She nodded like a little child. “You're right. I've been longing to do all the things they've said I mustn't do. Just now I couldn't control my urge to dive into that pond.”

“Then don't try to control it. Go for a swim,” Torihiko suggested simply. “It's sticky and humid tonight. A swim would be perfect. I need one, too. I stink of sweat.”

Saya's eyes grew round. “But it's the palace pond. You wouldn't dare do such an outrageous thing,” she started to protest when suddenly her sense of mischief overcame her. It was the first time in a long while. “But then it's so out of the way that the guards probably wouldn't see us. Maybe no one will ever find out.”

“Of course they won't find out. No one here would ever dream of doing such a thing.”

At Torihiko's lighthearted urging, Saya jumped to the ground in her bare feet. The familiar sensation of earth against the soles of her feet, the pungent fragrance of grass and trees in the dead of night, and, best of all, the summer darkness wrapped her in a close embrace. There could be no sweeter pleasure than to do what was forbidden. Like a nocturnal creature, she stole through the shadows, suppressing her excitement, until she came to the grove of ancient trees in the depths of the garden. Here, blinded by the darkness, the trees dreamed the dream of a deep mountain forest. Enticed by a gentle breeze, the grove was enveloped in the ancient song of the pine, the long-ago tale of the cedar. The moss on the bank of the pond was warm and damp; it felt as if she were standing on the back of a furry creature. Looking at the moon floating on the water's surface, she laughed aloud.

Torihiko was undressed first. He slid into the pond and parted the water with easy graceful strokes.

“You swim like a frog,” Saya commented as she slipped into the water.

The water in the pond was softer than river water and the sensation filled her with exhilaration. She had never swum at night before, but there was no undercurrent and nothing frightening lurked in the water, which seemed to have been cleansed by the moonlight. She swam like a fish, gliding this way and that, forgetting all her cares. She could now laugh at the troubles that she had previously thought would cause her to waste away. Torihiko's appearance seemed another rich joke. Whatever would be would be.

“Wouldn't it be wonderful just to turn into one of the fish in this pond?” she said as she floated on her back. As if in response, a huge carp leaped right beside her. For an instant his scales and fins flashed like silverwork in the moonlight. Saya laughed aloud.

“Did you see that, Torihiko? It was the king of the pond.”

“Why don't you give him our greetings? Tell him we apologize for swimming in his pond without asking his leave,” Torihiko responded from the far bank. Pretending to obey his command, Saya dived neatly underwater. Naturally, it was dark, but, surprisingly, she could see—or rather, she could see the carp. His body seemed to glow with a faint light. He was magnificent—longer than her arm and fit to be called a king. His whiskers were long, too, and his face seemed very ancient.

She could see all this clearly because he had swum up close to her, apparently curious. He seemed to know no fear. Then, waving his fins in front of her nose, he spoke.

“So I'm not the only one who wishes to become a fish on a summer's night. But if that is your wish, why not turn into a carp? Your body is much too awkward to enjoy swimming properly.”

Saya thought it was Torihiko teasing her. In her surprise, she exhaled and had to swim quickly to the surface. When she turned her head, Torihiko was standing on the bank squeezing water from his hair.

“Torihiko!” she screamed without thinking. A sharp stab of fear went through her as she was suddenly pulled under, swallowing a great mouthful of water. If Torihiko had not realized that something was wrong and pulled her out, she would have drowned. When she finally lay clinging to a rock, racked by coughs, a light appeared between the trees. Torihiko started and blinked his eyes in surprise. Two forms stood at the top of the bank: Princess Teruhi, with a torch in her hand, and a manservant carrying a rake.

“I thought I warned you that I would wind a rake in your hair and drag you out,” Princess Teruhi said, her voice charged with anger. “Do you wish to drown yourself so badly that you would risk such humiliation?”

“I was just swimming,” Saya gasped, still coughing. In her close brush with death, she had mislaid all courtesy. “Get out of my way and let me out please. There's an evil spirit in this pond. Let me out of here.”

“Oh-ho! An evil spirit, she says.” Princess Teruhi feigned an exaggerated interest, as if baiting her. “You certainly have some nerve to claim that there is an evil spirit in the Mirror Pond, in the very midst of the Palace of Light.”

Saya, her coughing finally under control, was slipping on her clothes, her hair streaming with water, but she said defensively, “It's true. A carp came and talked to me. He looked straight at me and asked why I didn't become a fish like him. He said, ‘So I'm not the only one who wants to become a fish on a summer's night.' ”

The manservant had his back turned to Saya out of propriety, but his shoulders suddenly began to shake. He seemed to be having difficulty suppressing his mirth.

Princess Teruhi, however, did not laugh. Her eyes narrowed for an instant; then, she said casually, “You never cease to entertain us. If you're going to walk around half-asleep, you could at least do it more quietly.”

“It wasn't a dream. I would never dream such a crazy thing,” Saya said hotly, and then quickly held her tongue as Princess Teruhi's gaze suddenly grew fierce.

“It was a dream. Don't mention it again,” the Princess snapped, her voice shaking with anger.

“
WHAT ON EARTH
could it have been?”

The next morning, Saya still puzzled over it. Her grief and her desire to kill herself seemed unreal now; the evening had ended in farce. Yet, while the longing to die had certainly vanished like a dream, the carp's voice still echoed in her ear. Torihiko, of course, assured her that it had not been he.

“A long time ago, even the trees and the plants could talk, or so they say. But now when there are so few gods left, that's not possible. And I can't imagine that one of the gods could still be alive in the middle of the Palace of Light. This is the last place a god would be.” Torihiko shrugged. “It must have been your imagination, no doubt caused by an empty stomach.”

“Even you don't believe me?” Saya said indignantly. But when she thought about it, she was starving. Her appetite seemed to have returned. Once again her normal self, she hurriedly headed for the morning room.

If I hear that voice again, I'll recognize it,
she thought.

She continued thinking about it while she ate. It was not an evil voice. Rather, it was a young voice: distinctive, guileless, and, considering that she had heard it for the first time, somehow familiar.
Princess
Teruhi behaved strangely. She must have some idea whose voice it was.
She knows something. There must be something there.

chapter
three
C
HIHAYA

I long to fetch water from the mountain brook,

bedecked with Japanese rose,

but alas for me that I know not

the way which I must go.

— Prince Takechi

Chihaya

“T
HE SACRED RITUAL OF
purification is essential for the elimination of the evil and defilement that unavoidably cling to those who live upon this impure earth, and for the attainment of heavenly purity. In particular, the great purification ceremony, held twice a year, is essential to cleanse the entire Palace of Light and preserve its honor.” The senior handmaiden was instructing a group of five or six younger novices, including Saya.

“On that day the Prince and the Princess, followed by all those in important positions, will assemble beside the Nakase River at the West Gate and wash all defilement into the river. Therefore you must on no account fail in your task. The handmaidens of Princess Teruhi's hall will also be performing the ceremony at the river, so be careful that you do not disgrace us.” She placed particular emphasis on the final words. There was considerable rivalry between the attendants of the Prince and the Princess. Although Saya sat respectfully, listening with one ear to the lecture, her mind was wandering.

Princess Teruhi will leave for the battlefield in the west after the end of the month,
she thought.
Prince Tsukishiro will be alone. I wonder if his feelings will change once she is far away. Will he be able to turn to me with his whole heart?

She knew it was useless to hope. But unrequited love means just that: the inability to live without hoping even though one knows it is futile. She realized that she was waiting in anxious anticipation.
I wish the ceremony would come sooner
. . .

Having carefully explained the role that the girls must perform in the ceremony, the senior handmaiden changed her tone of voice. “Do you understand what purity really means? Or what defilement is? As handmaidens, you of all people must grasp the meaning of the bounty bestowed upon us by the illustrious God of Light.”

She called on one of the girls to answer. With shining eyes and flushed cheeks, the novice responded readily. “The bounty bestowed by the illustrious God of Light is the transformation of Darkness into Light. Darkness refers to those things which die and decay. The God of Light will descend to purify this earth, which is defiled by Darkness, and to confer eternal life and beauty.”

That's the shrine maidens' creed. Even I could have said that,
Saya thought.
I've heard it so often this last month that I'm sick of it.

“Exactly,” the senior handmaiden said with a satisfied nod. “The Palace of Light is the only place in all the lands of Toyoashihara that mirrors the purity of heaven. You should not be content merely with having the good fortune to be chosen as handmaidens. If you work even harder at your duties and constantly strive to purify yourselves, someday you may even approach the perfection of the Immortal Children of Light.” She placed a hand proudly on her bosom. “Through the blessed bounty of the God of Light, this is my sixty-fourth year of service as a handmaiden.”

At this the girls, who had been sitting with eyes cast down, hoping for the lecture to end, raised their heads simultaneously in astonishment, doubting their ears. Saya was no exception. Although she had heard rumors that the senior handmaiden was older than she looked, she could not believe she was that old. Even if she had entered service at the age of fifteen, she should long since have been stooped with age.

The senior handmaiden looked at the girls' amazed expressions with satisfaction and smiled. “You must offer yourselves, both body and soul, in service to the God of Light. Through this the road will be opened to you. First you must strive to purify yourselves from all defilement.”

She gave no indication of being past her prime as she swept her train elegantly aside and glided from the room. Cold and rigid as she was, her beauty was unrivaled. The girls gazed after her, dumbfounded. But once she had gone they were released from the spell and immediately gathered together to gossip.

“Is it true? Can we really keep our youth through purification?”

“From what I've heard, it's true. They say there's no rite as terrible as the great purification.”

“Terrible?”

“Because of the human sacrifice.”

“No!”

“Shhh!” One of the girls put her finger to her lips. “We aren't supposed to talk about it. But they say that the Nakase River is also called the River of Bones. Because ashes and bones are washed away in the river.”

“Oh! How horrible!”

“In other words . . .”

The girls who were huddled in a corner of the passageway suddenly fell silent. They had remembered that Saya was there.

“Let's go,” one of them said loudly, and, turning cold glances in her direction, they quickly left. Saya was disappointed. She wanted to know the rest of the details. It bothered her that someone was to be sacrificed in the ceremony.

I guess I shouldn't have expected the purification to be a mere ritual like the ceremony at our village festivals. After all, this is the Palace of Light.

While she stood thinking, she heard indignant voices beyond the corner of the passageway. It was the girls who had just left.

“My! Did you see that? The serving boy who just went by?”

“He didn't even bow.”

“Whose servant is he? Imagine! He was walking across the bare ground!”

As Saya expected, Torihiko came running into view. His forelock was neatly trimmed and he was dressed in cool blue linen, but the propriety of his outward appearance was marred by the fact that he was cutting across the garden without using the walkway.