Emily's Affair (26 page)

"Emily," Jake said through clenched teeth when she paused to draw in a breath.

"And I don't want children. I have absolutely no maternal instincts and a child would just interfere in—"

"Enough." In one fluid movement, Jake flipped Emily on her back and came up over her. "Let's get a few things straight. We are more than friends. This is more than sex." She started to object and he ignored her. "And for the record, I chose who is right and wrong for me. Not you. Me. Got it?" He didn't give her a chance to respond, but claimed her mouth in a hard, punishing kiss.

Jake tore his mouth away. "And while we're on the subject of marriage and babies, if you find out you're pregnant, then you will tell me." He gave her a hard stare. "And you will marry me."

She opened her mouth.

"End of discussion." Jake stopped her spluttering objections the best way he knew. He gripped the back of her head and fused their mouths together, then rolled over and pulled her onto his chest.

Emily wrenched her mouth from his and pushed herself up to look into his face. "Don't fall for me, Jake."

He gazed into her eyes and saw something which caused some of his irritation to diminish. Fear.

"I'm not as innocent or sweet as you think."

Jake opened his mouth to correct her, but the resigned sadness in her expression stopped him.

"I've done things which… I don't regret, but I'm ashamed I had to do them. You deserve someone better than me." Emily swallowed visibly. "Don't ask for more, because I'm not the one you want."

Jake cupped her face and smoothed a thumb across her cheek. "I wouldn't be here if you weren't the one I wanted."

"That's different."

"Is it?" Jake shook his head as soon as the words were out of his mouth. "No, don't answer. It's late. You need sleep, if you plan on being coherent tomorrow." He urged her down and into his arms and shifted so she could lay her head on his shoulder.

Emily draped her arm over his stomach. "Will you be there tomorrow?"

Jake frowned. What kind of question was that? "Why wouldn't I be there?"

She shrugged and burrowed closer to him. "I don't know. I just thought you might have something more important to do than watch—"

Jake gave her a firm squeeze, which stopped her words. "Nothing is more important."

Emily relaxed against him and Jake wished he could do the same, but he couldn't. An hour ago, he'd had no doubt about where he stood with Emily. But now, there was nothing but questions in his mind. Questions, not about his feelings, but concerns about her hang-ups.

She trusted him, but there was something else holding her back. What was holding her back? What terrible thing from her past did she think made her so unworthy?

Jake had no answers, but he sensed that one problem was that she was worried about tomorrow. He smoothed a hand over her tousled blonde hair and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"There's nothing to be nervous about. Tomorrow will be perfect," he said after a few minutes of contemplative silence. "You'll see."

"As long as you're there," came her sleepy response.

Something clicked and Jake relaxed. He should have seen it sooner—especially after all the hours of psycho-babble he'd endured during his first few months of sobriety.

Emily came from a wholly dysfunctional family. Her father has died when she was two. Her mother was a cocaine addict. Emily had been forced to assume adult responsibilities at a young age. Chances were fairly good that people had assumed that his sweet, innocent, little Emily didn't need certain things.

Certain things, such as, being there and supporting her on one of the most important days of her life. No wonder Emily didn't want him to get close to her. She was probably terrified that he would hurt her. Which explained why she reacted the way she did when he made his earlier blunder.

A blunder which he wouldn't make again.

Emily might be ready for the physical stuff, but she was nowhere near being ready for the emotional price which came with it.

Jake listened to her deep, even breathing and pulled the blanket up, tucking it around them like a cocoon. He brushed a kiss to her hair.

One day she would be ready for the emotional aspects.

Jake only prayed that he was the man she'd fall for.

Jake had, naively, expected things to calm down for Emily after the fashion show—which had been a complete success for both The Brigade and Emily. He'd hoped to be able to spend more time with her, but, as it turned out, being both CEO and President of Stafford & Co. was a role which usurped most of Emily's time and energy.

Not that Jake was complaining.

He was proud of Emily and her accomplishments. One of the traits that had attracted him to her was the fact that she knew what she wanted and how to get it. Jake wasn't exactly pleased with the way Emily had arranged her priorities, but he wouldn't complain.

No, he would definitely not complain.

If Emily wanted to make her company number one in her life, then Jake was learning that he had no choice but to scramble for the number two slot.

Jake glanced at his watch, eight-thirty. Number two slot? Hell, he'd be lucky if he ranked in the top ten.

But he would not complain.

And why wouldn't he complain? Because Jake knew that if he did, Emily would use that against him and go find some other schmuck to dance to her tune. He'd discovered that little fact the first night she stood him up.

Jake cursed under his breath and set a rack of freshly washed glasses on the bar.

"What time is Emily supposed to show up?"

Jake looked at Alex. "Seven."

"Did she call?"

"Nope." Jake picked up a towel and started drying glasses. "Just like she didn't call last night."

"Did Marilyn call?"

"Nope."

"That's damned inconsiderate," Alex mumbled.

Jake grunted his agreeance.

"Emily probably got sidetracked in a meeting or something," Alex muttered. "She does have a large company to run."

"You mean, she got sidetracked with her large corporation. Again."

"How many times? Two? Three," Alex asked, stowing the dry glasses under the bar.

"The fourth time this week."

"Jake, man, you've gotta have a talk with her. She can't keep doing this."

Jake handed the last glass to Alex. "And say what?"

"I don't know. Tell her she works too much or something."

Jake picked up the rack and shoved it back into the washer, then wiped down the bar. "I used that line on Monday and she came back with the any-other-man-in-the-world-would-understand-how-important-my-work-is-to-me line. On Tuesday I got the if-you-don't-like-it-then-find-someone-else line. You don't even want to know what was said last night."

"Jake, you're letting her walk all over you. You've gotta stand up and be firm with her. Show her who's boss."

"With any other female, I'd have put an end to this weeks ago. But Emily's different."

"How so," Alex asked.

"She expects me to dump her."

Alex's face rumpled into a mask of confusion. "
What
?"

Jake tossed aside the damp dishtowel. "The closer we get, the harder she tries to push me away."

"That is so backwards."

"I agree." Jake shrugged. "But that's the way it is."

"Why would she do that?"

"She's afraid."

"Afraid of what? That you'll give her exactly what all women want? Commitment?"

Jake heaved a pathetic laugh. "If only it were that simple. Emily has this bizarre notion that I expect her to quit her job and spend the rest of her life waiting on me."

Alex massaged his forehead. "Jake, I shudder to think what kind of losers your girlfriend has tortured in the past. Do you hear me? I shudder."

Jake clapped Alex on the shoulder. "Don't shudder too hard, my friend, because I'm the first."

Alex's hand slowly dropped to his side. "The first?"

"And if I have anything to say about it. The only."

Alex took a minute to digest that bit of information. "You're the first. Oh." A sly grin spread across his face. "Well, that makes all the difference in the world."

"Doesn't it though."

"Especially the only part. Just for the record, I am very jealous." Alex cleared his throat. "So, Jake, how are you plannin' on handling her tonight?"

"Assuming she calls me when she gets home?"

Alex nodded.

"Indifference."

Alex laughed. "She ought to hate that."

Jake smiled. "One can only hope."

Emily yawned and kicked the front door closed. She was exhausted, but she was in a great mood. The catalog was practically finished and, if everything went according to schedule, it would be ready for distribution in a couple of weeks.

The one thorn in her side and what she'd spent the majority of the past four days dealing with was the newest site for Stafford & Co., which wasn't nearly as far along as she'd hoped it would be. It seemed like each time the phone rang it was someone associated with the construction of the new site, calling to tell Emily that Monday's quote didn't include putting a roof on the building, or yesterday's quote didn't cover the cost for plastering the walls.

But, other than that, life was going along splendidly. Mrs. Abergheny was ecstatic over the dress Emily had designed for her daughter's wedding. Emily had been petitioned by three Congressmen's wives to design wardrobes suitable for the Washingtonian circuit. And to top it all off, Emily had spent every night wonderfully, incredibly, and blissfully snuggled up to Jake.

She could barely wait until he showed up tonight and whisked her back to the bedroom, then had his Heavenly, but wholly wicked way with her.

Emily smiled and, dropping her briefcase on the floor, trudged back to her bedroom, then flung herself on the bed. She sighed and wiggled her toes until her shoes plopped to the floor. "Ooh, that feels so good."

She closed her eyes and imagined Jake and his magnificent hands massaging every inch of her tired—

Emily's lashes flew open. "
Jake
." She turned her head to look at the clock on the nightstand and immediately winced. "Oh no. Not again." She rolled over and reached for the phone, then punched in his number.

Jake answered on the second ring.

"I'm sorry," Emily said without preamble. "I didn't get home until a few minutes ago and… oh Jake, I'm so sorry. I should have called to tell you that I was gonna be late, but I didn't have a—"