Face the Winter Naked (26 page)

Handling
it carefully, she carried it to the front room, leaned it in plain sight in a
corner near Daniel's mandolin shelf, then sat down to wait. What kind of damage
could it do? She had no idea, except that it could kill animals. Of course, she
had no intention of shooting anyone, but she was prepared if it came to
self-defense.

Chapter 21

Traveling
by foot and not eating right for long periods of time had sapped the strength
from Daniel's body. He'd had a decent living at Petrie's farm, but the damage
was already done. Now his heart raced and he gasped for breath as he sat in a
corner of the boxcar, and after a few minutes his overworked body settled down.
He cradled George's banjo lovingly, thinking of the time not so long ago when
the two had shared a boxcar, before the banjo man departed at St. Louis and
Daniel headed south.

The
rocking car lulled him to a half-awake existence, his restless mind slipping
again and again from the present to the past. Night flew by the open door,
occasionally broken by lights in the distance. Dark shadows on darker
backgrounds. The stuff of nightmares that scares kids, and grown men.

...
Gunfire broke out and mortars blasted in the distance. Tracers lit up the sky
and whistled overhead. Light rain fell, and the air was filled with the smell
of gunpowder as Shine crouched in a trench with an inch of water at the bottom.
Rain and fear soaked his shirt. His hands trembled trying to steady the gun. He
listened, not daring to move.

Silence—an
ominous sign of danger on a battlefield. The gunfire ceased for a few minutes
then started up again.

Hearing
a scuffling sound, he jerked his Winchester up just as an enemy soldier
surprised him with a fixed bayonet at the edge of the trench.

No!
Stop!

The
young soldier yelled something in German and screamed as Shine fired at his
chest, then fell into the muddy hole.

"It's
like killing a fox with rabies," his battery commander had said.
"When your life's in danger, you don't think, you shoot."

It
wasn't true. Daniel knew better than anyone about the binding tie between
humans that prevented most from taking a life, even in self-defense.

He
retched repeatedly, racking his body as a dark stain spread through the front
of the soldier's uniform. Wave after wave of dizziness washed over him until he
thought he'd pass out. The soldier raised a hand, but Shine shrank away as life
flowed from the body.

He's
just a kid!

The
soldier's hand fell limply on Shine's knee. His lips parted, but no words came.
He stopped trying to breathe. His jaw dropped, his eyes fixed on his enemy as
life deserted him.

The
sounds of artillery increased in the distance. Voices shouted. Someone
screamed. Rain fell.

"Daniel!"

Someone
touched his shoulder and shined a light in his face. His hands thrashed at the
intruder and he rolled away as screams filled the boxcar.

"Come
on, wake up. You're scaring me. What's wrong? What happened?"

The
voice—young, familiar. He couldn't place it as he struggled to bring his mind
back.

"Who—?"

Sweat
broke over his brow as he tried to sit up and focus his eyes in the darkness.

"Wake
up, Daniel, please. It's me, Chris."

Daniel
reached for the small hand as it touched his shoulder again, and suddenly all
hell broke loose and hot tears spurted from his eyes.

Chris
pulled his hand away.

"I'm
afraid! You were screaming. Screaming that you shot a man."

"Yes,
oh yes." Daniel tried to control his weeping, but found he could not.
"I killed a man. Many men."

"What
are you talking about? What men?"

Daniel
took a deep breath to steady himself, ashamed for a grown man to be caught
crying like a baby.

"Where
did you come from?" he asked Chris. "I couldn't find you and had to
leave without you."

He
sat up, now fully aware of his surroundings, his face wet, still weeping
silently. Grotesque mental images crawled away to the bottom of his mind. He
was on a fast-moving train to Kansas City. It was good to hear the boy's voice.
But he was puzzled that Chris seemed to have materialized from nowhere. Where
had he stolen the flashlight?

"Where
were you?" he asked again. "How did you get here?"

"I
didn't think you'd let me come. So I followed you and sneaked in this boxcar
with you."

Daniel
tried to smile, but it made his face hurt. "So that's it. I thought I
sensed someone lurking around. Where'd you go last night, you sneaky little
rascal?"

"Uh,
what do you mean?"

"You
know what I mean." He wiped his eyes. "Dadgummit, Chris, I left you
to watch my stuff and you cut out on me."

"Aw,
I just walked around by the depot."

"Somebody
could've come along and stole my things. That's what I get for trusting a kid
with a head full of bright ideas."

"Wasn't
nobody there to steal anything except cows."

"So
you decided not to come back at all, right? Just strike out bumming on your own
without a care in the world."

Chris
thought for a minute. "I was coming back, then I got the idea to follow
you. Are you mad?"

"I'm
mad as hell you didn't tell me where you were going," Daniel said.
"But I'm not mad you hopped aboard this train." There was no answer
from the boy. "Life's too short to stay mad at anyone. You can come to my
house with me, Christopher Davis."

"You
know my name."

"Yep,
the man you accused of picking my pocket told me."

"Gee
whiz, Daniel, why'd you ask
him
?"

"I
asked because kidnapping ain't legal, and if you go with me, that's what a
judge would call it."

"Then
I can still go?"

"Looks
like you already decided." He wiped his wet cheeks with the back of his
hand.

"Can
I?"

"Yep.
But only till I get in touch with your family."

"I'm
not going back there."

"Maybe
not. But I'm obligated to let them know where you are. If they don't care,
maybe I can get custody and you can live with my family." He paused.
"But I can't picture them not caring about their own son."

"Trust
me," Chris said, "they don't care a hill of beans. They done told me
that."

"You
might be surprised. People's hearts can change in a minute if a loved one's
threatened."

"You
didn't threaten me."

"I
whipped your thieving little hide, didn't I?"

"That
don't count. Did you mean it about me going home with you?"

"Certainly."

"I
don't believe it. Really?"

"Yes,
really."

"Are
you mad at me for hiding? What were you dreaming? You didn't really kill
someone, did you?"

"Hey,
one question at a time." Daniel could see the boy's outline with the
flashlight on again and his eyes more accustomed to the dark. "How could I
be mad? You're my friend, little buddy. I tried to find you but you were
gone." He paused. "Matter of fact, if I had my choice of traveling
companions, I'd pick you." He reached out and patted Chris's head.
"When a man comes out from a—a nightmare like I just had, he needs a good
friend to lean on."

"What
was it about? The nightmare. You scared the shit out of me."

"Don't
cuss!" Daniel said, his voice stern. "I don't know if I'd tell a
young squirt your age what the nightmare was. It's too scary."

"I'm
not a innocent little kid. I seen things most kids never would. So come on. Was
it about the man—or
men
you said you killed? You didn't really do it,
did you?"

"I
did, and I'm sorry." Daniel's tears started again, and he was glad it was
dark. "In the war. I killed men in the war. I didn't want to, but they
said I had to."

Chris
listened as Daniel explained about the war. Finally he said, "You had to
kill your enemies or they'd kill you."

"That's
right. But it tore my heart out to shoot another human being." He paused a
minute. "My best friends died in the war, Chris—Milt, Leonard, Frank, Big
Woody. They were good boys, each with his own family. Moms, dads, and wives.
Now they're gone, and ol' Shine's still alive. It ain't fair."

"Who's
Shine?"

"That's
me, it's a nickname they gave me." He sighed. "The good ones died,
but the worthless one survived."

"You
ain't worthless," Chris said. "Don't say that again. You want
worthless? My—my dad, he's worthless. All he knows is how to make more kids he
don't want." His voice broke. "I even thought about stabbing him
once."

"But
you couldn't," Daniel said, shocked by the confession. "Just like I
couldn't. Thank the Lord most people are civilized. There's so much good in
this life, but when I have one of those nightmares, I forget what it is."

They
rode in silence for a few minutes, feeling the car sway on the tracks.

"You
don't understand, do you?" Daniel said. "I can't expect a boy to know
what I'm talking about."

"It
scares me. I'm not afraid of most things, but this scares me."

"I'm
sorry. I shouldn't have told you."

"It's
okay."

"No,
it ain't okay, Mr. Christopher. War is hell."

"Yeah."
Chris paused then asked again, "Did you mean it about taking me
home?"

"Sure
did."

A
banjo note floated through the boxcar. Then another, the same one over and
over.

"This
thing needs some new strings," Chris said. "It's only got one
left." He plucked the single string again.
Plink. Plink. Plink.

"I'll
fix it for you someday."

The
note stopped.

"Daniel?"

"What?"

"I'm
glad you're not mad."

"I
couldn't stay mad at you if my life depended on it," Daniel said.
"You remind me of myself in a lot of ways. Better get some rest before we
get to the city."

"What
are we going to do there?"

"Going
to eat first thing. Then I need to see some folks about work. I can't go home
till I have a job. I wouldn't dare face my wife after running out on her,
unless I found work to support my family with."

"What's
her name, your wife?"

"Her
name's LaDaisy." The name rolled off Daniel's tongue as smooth as silk.
"Prettiest little woman on earth."

Neither
spoke for a few minutes, then Chris said, "Daniel? You awake? You're not
having another nightmare, are you?"

"I'm
awake, and I'm all right."

"I
just remembered what somebody told me about dreams," Chris said. "I
don't know if this works, cause I never tried it. "

Daniel
straightened up and tried to see the boy. "What's this about, Chris? I'll
try most anything to make these bad dreams stop."

Chris
plucked the string again. "It sounds dumb. But you can chase your
nightmares away. Then they won't be scary anymore."

"Is
that right?"

"I
don't know how you can do it, Daniel. Maybe you can figure it out."

Daniel
became thoughtful. "Well, you'd have to know you're dreaming while you're
dreaming. How the heck could you do that?"

"Don't
ask me."

"I'll
give it some thought ... before the next nightmare happens."

The
train rolled northwesterly from Springfield, sometimes with as much as a
half-hour layover at some small town before moving on again.

Daniel
couldn't sleep and lay awake making plans. He couldn't jump off the train just
any old place now. There was Chris to think of. He had to consider what effect
his decisions would have on this boy.

Though
it was still dark, he knew they were on the eastern edge of the metropolis
after passing through Swope Park. Lights popped on in houses and streetlights
twinkled in the distance. Familiar scenery rolled by as he counted city blocks.
After the freight crossed the Blue River, before the tracks looped back into
the city proper, he shook Chris awake.

"Come
on, son, it's time to go."

"Wh—where
are we?"

"Kan'
City. Come on, it's about time to get off. We'll be slowing down soon."

He
helped the boy up, steadied him, led him to the door.

"Watch
your step here ... can you still jump?"

"Yeah,
I think so."

The
freight announced its presence with a loud blast and blowing smoke, chugging
slowly through the outskirts of the city before slowing to a snail's pace.
Daniel felt the familiar surroundings enclose him as he helped a sleepy Chris
to the ground.

They
stood a good distance from the tracks, watching freight cars roll by in the
near darkness, wheels clacking as each car bumped and swayed on the rails. The
train was long, and they couldn't see the engine or coal car up ahead. A cloud
of smoke filled the air as Daniel picked up his gunnysack and likewise Chris
the banjo.