Forgiven (25 page)

Yet she was traipsing around hidden places, having an affair with Dayne Matthews, who meanwhile still lived with his lead ing lady, Kelly Parker. They’d probably start following Katy around too, hoping to catch her going to church or doing some other such thing. That way they could call her a hypocrite.

The possibilities turned his stomach. He leaned back and searched the front of the room until he found Katy. She was placing kids in a single line, explaining how they each needed to hold on to the shoulders of the person in front of them.

“Once you have your balance, kick one leg up behind you.” She waved someone over—Rhonda, no doubt. “Watch; it’s like this.” Her hands went on Rhonda’s shoulders, she kicked her leg up behind her, and the two of them hopped forward.

“See? You’re supposed to look like a long line of commuters making your way through New York City.”

The kids put their hands on the shoulders of the kids in front of them. But as soon as they balanced on one foot and started 205

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hopping, a boy near the back tripped and fell onto the girl in front of him. The fall started a slow-motion domino effect, and in a matter of seconds, all the kids landed in a heap on the floor.

“Okay.” Katy dusted her hands off and looked at Rhonda. “It needs a little work, but it’ll be great.”

“We can’t do it,” one boy yelled out.

“Yeah, it’s too hard.” Another stood beside him, arms crossed. “Everyone keeps jumping on each other’s feet.”

A chorus of agreement echoed across the stage as the kids untangled themselves and stood up. One little girl was clearly more shaken up than the others. She had her head down, and even from the back of the room, Dayne could hear her crying.

Katy noticed, too, and went to her. “What is it, Maggie?”

“S-S-Sarah Jo.” The girls crying got louder, her sobs more pronounced. “I m-m-miss her.”

The other kids realized what was happening. One of the boys sat down cross-legged and looked at Katy. “Sarah Jo would’ve helped us bring this together. She had really good balance.”

“Yes.” Katy looked at the sad faces around her. “She had good balance; that’s true.” She put her arm around Maggie. “But this number doesn’t need one very balanced person.” She held out her arms, and the kids instinctively drew closer, forming a cluster of standing and sitting kids around her feet. “Everyone has to be balanced together.”

“But Sarah Jo should be here, Katy. She should.” Maggie’s face was stained with tears, and several of the older kids hung their heads.

“Sarah Jo is here.” Katy made a fist and pressed it to her heart. “She’s in our hearts and minds, in our memories. We can’t ever forget that.” She bent down and hugged Maggie. “We’re doing our best on this show for her and little Ben, remember?”

There were a few hushed responses, but most of the kids said nothing.

In the quiet that followed Dayne felt like an intruder, an out 206 2O6

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sider who shouldn’t be privy to this type of private moment. Still, he couldn’t tear himself away from it.

One of the teenage boys offered a suggestion. “Maybe if we stop for a minute and pray. Just so we can focus on what’s really important here.” He looked at Katy and then at the other kids. “This is about a lot more than the show. It’s about coming together.”

Without further prompting, the kids formed a circle and joined hands. Katy looked like one of them as she took her spot between two of the little girls.

Once their heads were bowed, the teenage boy prayed loud and clear. “Things happen for a reason, Lord. We’ve been saying that again and again since the accident. And no, we don’t always see that reason or understand it. But we believe—” his voice broke, and for a few seconds he paused— “we believe You’re here. And that You have Sarah Jo and Ben safely with You.” He exhaled hard. “Now please.., let this show bring You glory. Let it be something we can perform in the memory of the friends we lost.”

When the prayer was over, Dayne watched them get back in line. At the piano, a friendly looking older woman picked up the melody. The kids put their hands on the shoulders of the person in front of them, and like a single body, they each raised their left foot behind them and hopped forward on their right. Not a persen swayed or fell over.

When the number ended, Katy raised her fist in the air and whooped for joy.

“See… you can do this! You can and you will, and it’ll be the best show ever.”

Dayne was awestruck at what he’d just seen. It was more than genuine theater and the brilliance of Katy’s ability with the kids. It was something that had to do with the prayer the boy had spoken. Almost as if the kid was right, and God Himself really was here, working some sort of miracle right in the middle of the rehearsal.

Watching Katy with the kids drove Mitch Henry’s point 207

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home, forcing him to make a decision. Never mind what he’d told her earlier when they were on their run. What they’d shared together—the time and laughter, the intimacy of being close enough to kiss—all of it was wonderful. He’d told her the truth; he’d remember every minute forever.

It wasn’t pretend—he’d been right about that. But he was wrong about the rest.

He couldn’t promise that he’d find a way back to her. Not when he had no idea how to start life over, and she had so much to lose. He watched her for the rest of rehearsal, never taking his eyes from her for more than a few seconds.

He noticed Bailey Flanigan looking at him and at the boy who had prayed. It didn’t matter if they knew. This would be his last CKT rehearsal. He could joke about painting sets and being here for opening night, but none of it was ever going to happen. Not if it meant putting Katy Hart’s privacy and reputation and her job with these kids at risk.

The closer the rehearsal came to ending, the worse he felt. He had to tell Katy.

Waiting would only make things harder for both of them. Besides, the media could arrive in town any day. Paparazzi had a way of sniffing out stories, and they might expect Dayne to come in early. Even just for a few days of privacy. It was the photogs’ job to make sure that never happened, that Dayne never had a chance to do anything they didn’t chronicle for all the world to see.

He gritted his teeth and watched as Katy finished with the kids. He moved to the far side of the room so none of them would notice him on their way out. When everyone was gone, even Rhonda, Katy made her way up the aisle, set her bag down, and held her hands out to him. “That was a tough one.”

“I saw.” He stood and gave her a quick hug, nothing too long or lingering. “Hey, Katy, I talked to my director.”

Something changed in her expression, as if she had some idea of what was coming.

“Just now?”

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“A while ago.” He leaned against the pew and slipped his hands into his pockets.

“He wants me to stay away from you.”

“I’m sure.” She nodded, but she couldn’t hide the pain that flashed in her eyes.

“He’s just looking out for you.”

“Not for me.” Dayne wanted her to understand everything he was feeling. ‘“I’m not worried about me, Katy. He isn’t either, not ‘I really.”

“Sure he is.” Katy tried to laugh, but the sound fell short. “You’re about to star in a film with a woman you’-re living with, Dayne. If anyone sees me with you that throws the whole picture into a tailspin.”

He brought his lips together in a thin line. She understood more than he thought. “But it’s more than that.”

“What?” She picked up her bag and held it to her chest. “Don’t tell me he’s worried about what the paparazzi would do to me. I have no skeletons.”

“You will when the press gets finished with you.” He said the words so softly, even he could barely hear them. “Katy, they’ll make it look like we’re sleeping together. They’ll flaunt the fact that you’re a Christian drama teacher and make you look worse than Madonna in the process. I’ve seen them do it.” He took one hand from his pocket and touched her arm. “I can’t watch them do it to you.”

She held her body stiffly, her expression steeled against the emotions he knew must be tearing at her heart. “I have a meeting with the older kids this afternoon, and tomorrow’s church.” She looked into his eyes, and he felt her find the deep places, the places she had found back in California. “So I guess this is it.”

He wanted to laugh at the idea, stand and shout that the thought was ridiculous.

Of course this wasn’t it. Katy Hart was the only woman who had ever touched him this way, the only one he’d cared about because of her inside more than her outside. He didn’t break eye contact with her. “How can you say that?”

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“Because it is. Did you just hear yourself? Your director wants you to stay away from me. You even said that being together could ruin everything for you and me both.” She gave a sad shake of her head. “I get it, Dayne. I’m right. This is it.”

He took his other hand from his pocket and clenched his fists. “I hate this.”

His tone was carefully measured. He was too sad to get very angry. “Let’s get in your car and drive to Canada or Alaska.”

She touched his shoulder. A sad smile played on her lips. “They have movies there too.”

“I’ll see you again before I go.” He worked the muscles in his jaw and took a step closer to her. “The director’s right. I won’t do it if it means you’ll get caught by the paparazzi. But if there’s any way…” He let the sentence die. Who was he kidding? Once filming started, he’d be watched every moment. Even more than in Hollywood, where movie stars were a common sight.

She leaned in and kissed his cheek. “Goodbye, Dayne.” She motioned toward the front of the sanctuary. “I’m going to go over the script.” She searched his eyes one last time. “I enjoyed every minute of being with you.”

“Katy…” He caught her arm before she could turn away. “Don’t give up, please.

I’ll find a way.”

“Goodbye.” Her voice was a whisper, and already he could see tears welling in her eyes. She pulled away, turned, and headed back down the aisle.

He wanted to run after her, grab her, and tell her it was all a crazy joke. Of course they could spend time together. No one would ever tell them what they could or couldn’t do, right? They were two adults, after all.

But his feet wouldn’t let him go. His feet and his heart. Because no matter what he wanted to tell himself, Mitch Henry was right. He cared too much for Katy Hart to let the media swallow her whole. And as he walked through the back doors of the sanc

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tuary, through the lobby, and out to the parking lot toward car, he hurt worse than ever before.

By the time he got back to his hotel, he realized why it was so hard to walk away from her. It was because he not only cared about Katy Hart.

He loved her.

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KATY HAD LIED TO DAYNE.

She had no intention of going over the script. All she knew was that if she followed him out to his car, she might follow him anywhere he asked her to go.

And since the film crew was still two days from arriving, they might both be able to talk themselves into spending another afternoon or evening together.

But all of it was pointless. And so she pretended to have work, pretended she might be able to study the script after he left, when all she could do was close her eyes and let the tears come. Guys weren’t supposed to be this difficult, were they? But Dayne wasn’t just any other guy, and she’d known that from the beginning.

After a few minutes she pulled herself together, dried her eyes, and drove home to the Flanigans’. Jenny saw her as she walked in through the second front entrance, the one that led straight up to her little apartment.

“Katy!” She was at her side instantly, taking hold of her shoulders and trying to read the reason for her red, swollen eyes. “What’s wrong, honey?”

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It took a few seconds for Katy to find her voice. “I won’t.., see Dayne again.”

“Why?” Jenny didn’t look completely upset by the thought, but her concern was deep all the same. “Did something happen?”

Katy sniffed and clutched her bag a little more tightly. “Life happened. The world of make-believe ended today.”

Jenny hugged her, and they stayed that way for a while. When Katy pulled back, Jenny brushed away a stray tear on her cheek. “God has a plan for you, Katy. You believe that, right?”

“I do.” She dragged her fingertips across her cheeks. “But why did Dayne have to come here? Why did we have to find each other at all?”

Jenny thought for a moment. “I don’t know. But God does. Maybe you need to talk to Him.”

“I will.” Katy turned toward the stairs. “Thanks, Jenny. Hey .. I invited the older kids over at four o’clock for a Bible study.” She frowned. Her sadness over Dayne made even talking about this almost too difficult. “They’re still so angry?Jenny. We need to pray about that too.” She blinked back the hint of fresh tears. “At least they’re willing to meet with me.”

“I’m so glad. Every time Bailey talks about the drunk driver, it’s like she becomes somebody different. Someone cold and set on revenge. Jim and I can be in on the study if you want.”

“I would.” She managed a laugh. “After today, I’m not sure I can lead a prayer let alone a study.”

The time in her room was brief. She fixed her hair and makeup and stayed in constant prayer. It was right, what she’d done by releasing Dayne. Maybe she would see him again sometime over the next couple weeks. Or maybe not. Maybe never again. Either way she was glad they’d spent time together. She still wanted to research Kabbalah, because she’d said she would and she wanted to keep her word.

Her time alone with Dayne was over. With every passing min 213

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ute, she hurt a little more about the fact, but she knew it was the right thing.

Why risk having the story blow up in the gossip rags? For what, when he was going to return to Hollywood and Kelly Parker when the two weeks in Bloomington were over?

She forced all thoughts of Dayne and the last two days so deep they wouldn’t surface. At least not for the rest of the afternoon. Out her window she watched the first car pull into the Flanigans’ driveway.