Hold Me (7 page)

As I’m about to take a seat at the table, I notice Caleb’s suit jacket is folded on the other chair, so I go closer and slip my hand into the pockets. Caleb has been nothing but wonderful to me, and here I am, trying to violate his privacy. God, what is wrong with me? I shouldn’t be doing this. But my curiosity prevails.

I find a phone, but as I try to turn it on, I see it’s locked and I have to stop myself from groaning in disappointment as I return it to its place. Maybe it’s a good thing. This way when Caleb leaves, I can actually pretend that he’s this perfect man I’ve created in my mind and not yet another wrong guy I’ve been attracted to.

Even so, I check the other pocket and discover a small package of white round pills. I intently stare at the pills, but that doesn’t enable me to figure out what they’re for. Considering his line of work, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s carrying a little something to help him perform, but I haven’t seen him use any of that with me, unless he used it before, when I wasn’t around.

Since the pills are in a small plastic bag without any labels, I wonder if he has a health issue and doesn’t want anyone to know about it. And what if the pills aren’t exactly legal? Okay, so maybe Caleb has a drug problem and that’s why he needs all the money, to pay for his bad habits, but I haven’t gotten that vibe from him, which still doesn’t mean anything. Before I can drive myself crazy with theories, I stuff the pills back into the pocket and wait for Caleb to emerge from the bathroom. Some six or seven minutes later, he enters the kitchen, looking as dashing as ever.

“Am I late?” he asks.

“Nope.” I get to my feet as he retrieves his suit jacket. As he passes me by, I catch a whiff of strawberries and lilacs. A grin spreads across my face. “Do you like my shower gel?”

“Totally.” His lips spread into a smile. One part of me is happy that he’s going to smell like me, although I wish I had some shower gel for men. I just didn’t expect any men would be taking a shower in my bathroom.

“Great,” I say. “Thank you for... everything.”

“It was my pleasure,” he says. I follow him to the door, and I bite my lower lip as he’s about to leave. He hasn’t given me his number or any way to contact him, and I’m not sure if he wants me to, even if it’s just for another paid service. Before closing the door, he turns to look at me. “See you around.”

“Sure.” I nod, offering him a smile. The worst part is that I do want to see him, but I’m not sure if that’s a good idea. I can’t just keep hiring him for sex... or maybe I can. God. The door closes, and I’m left staring at it in silence. I should really hurry if I don’t want to be late for class, but somehow I don’t think I’ll be able to concentrate much on anything.

One part of me wonders why things can’t be easy and why I couldn’t have just met Caleb at some bar, and not like this. Things would’ve been so much different, but I can’t change that. Maybe it’s time for me to move on and forget about Caleb.

I tug down my pink cocktail dress as Katherine and I stroll into one of the stuffy clubs we frequent. It’s so dark for a moment that I can barely see where I’m going, but then I’m almost blinded by flashing, colorful lights. Katherine scans the room and takes hold of my arm, dragging me toward the bar. We sit on the empty high stools and order our drinks.

“Seen anyone interesting?” Katherine yells over the music, then takes a sip of her cocktail, her eyes trained on the crowd. The flashy silver short dress hugging her voluptuous body is catching a lot of attention, but she doesn’t seem to notice. Her bright red lips are pressed into a tight line.

“Not really.” Actually, I haven’t even been looking. “Wanna go dance?”

She shakes her head. “Later.”

“Are you waiting for someone?” Katherine usually doesn’t wait this long to go after some guy who she finds attractive. Surely there are at least two guys here who fit her type, and yet, she’s not moving from her seat.

A dark-haired guy approaches her, leaning onto the bar next to her. “Can I buy you a drink?” he asks.

She waves her hand at him. “No. Go away.”

The guy’s smile disappears and he shoots her a glare, then heads back toward the dance floor, his jaw set.

“What’s wrong?” I ask. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you refuse a drink.”

“I’m not in the mood.” She shrugs, then leans her head so her lips almost brush my ear. “How did it go with Caleb? You’ve been awfully quiet about him.”

“It was wonderful. Too perfect, actually.” Except for the weird pills I found, but there could be a reasonable explanation for that.

“Good,” she says. “But that’s over, right? You no longer have to pay anyone for anything.”

“Yeah.” I nod.

“Whatever you do, don’t call Caleb again, okay?” Her eyes meet mine, and I frown.

“What does it matter if I call him again or not?”

“You shouldn’t be around people like him. That’s all.” She focuses her gaze on the crowd again.

“People like him? What do you mean?”

“For Christ’s sake, Lilith. He’s a prostitute. Do you really think he’s perfect and doesn’t have any secrets? Just don’t get dragged into his shit, okay?” She picks up her glass, her hand shaking.

“Do you know him? Or someone who knows him?” I raise an eyebrow at her.

“No.” She refuses to look at me and now she’s gripping the glass with both hands. I’m not sure if I believe her, although why would she lie? Maybe she does know Caleb somehow. But before I can ask her more, she gets to her feet.

“Don’t wait for me.” She disappears into the dancing crowd and I can’t tell who she spotted.

Damn it. As I take a sip of my drink, I watch people having fun. A shiver runs through my body as I notice a dark-haired man in company of some men and women, his back turned to me. He reminds me so much of Caleb that I want to go see if it’s really him, but I can’t force myself to get up. Even if it is him, who’s to say he’ll even want to see me? Maybe he’s here with his friends who aren’t supposed to know anything about his job. I definitely don’t want to ruin his life or make things complicated for him.

A blond guy suddenly nudges the Caleb look-alike with his elbow and says something to him. Shit, the blond guy must have seen me staring for too long. But as the dark-haired man turns around, I realize he’s not Caleb, so I spin around on my stool and face the bar. Great. Now I’ll be seeing Caleb in every man out there.

“Hey,” a male voice next to me startles me so much that I nearly knock my glass over. I glance at the man and realize it’s the same dark-haired man I’ve been staring at. His eyes are gray or blue—I can’t tell because of the flashing lights—and he’s definitely not ugly. Or maybe I just can’t see well enough in the dark. Still, I give him a smile and let him buy me a drink.

“What’s your name, gorgeous?” He hops onto the stool next to me.

“Lilith,” I say. “And you are...?”

“Ryan.” He leans forward. “What are you doing here all alone?”

“Waiting for the right person to take me to the dance floor.” I give him a look under my eyelashes. He immediately offers me his hand and I take it. Once we reach the dance floor, he pulls me into his arms, his hands going for my ass. He’s not even trying to follow the rhythm of the song and keeps groping me. I move out of his embrace and start to dance on my own.

He’s still smiling at me and reaching out, but I twirl and evade him. But then he grabs my arm and grips it so hard that I stop to glare at him.

“Where are you going, baby?” he drawls. “I want you right here.” He tugs on my arm and pulls me toward him, making me stumble. I barely catch myself as he spins me around so he can press himself against my back. I can feel his erection at the small of my back, and when his hands go up to my boobs, I’ve had enough. I push his hands away and shove him off me.

“Hey, come back!” he yells after me, but I stride off to the other end of the dance floor and don’t look back.

Intent on forgetting Ryan ever existed and that he actually put his filthy hands on me, I look around for a decent dance partner. A tall dark-haired guy eyes me from the corner, but he doesn’t make a move toward me. Straightening my shoulders, I saunter toward him and start dancing in his full view. As I look over my shoulder, I wink at him. He finally approaches but doesn’t try to touch me. That’s a good sign.

“You’re a great dancer,” he says. All I can see are his dark eyes, and suddenly, his face melts into another that I actually want to see: Caleb’s.

“What’s your name?” I ask, hoping that talking will help me push Caleb out of my mind. There’s really no reason for me to think about him. None at all. And of course, he’s not here. Why would he be? I’m here to have fun and dance, maybe meet a new friend or a potential boyfriend, and not spend the whole night obsessing over the one I can’t have.

“Finn.”

“Lilith,” I say, offering him my hand. “Dance with me, Finn.”

He smiles at me, then slips his hand into mine. I pull him toward me and he awkwardly places his arms around my waist. I’m really glad a slow song is playing, but after some time of slow dancing, I can’t stop my mind from wandering back to Caleb. Where is he now? What is he doing? Maybe he’s with another client. Maybe he’s making some woman writhe and moan underneath him. A thrill surges through my body and I press myself closer to Finn, who tenses, so I look up at him.

“What’s wrong? Don’t like slow songs?” I try to sound cheerful.

“No, I just... I’m not a good dancer.” He swallows.

“You’re doing pretty fine.”

“Are you sure?” he asks, but a smile is tugging at his lips.

I nod, and we dance for a while until my feet start killing me.

“Care to join me for a drink?” I ask as we pull apart.

“Sure.” He follows me to the bar, and we take a seat at the end where no one will bother us. When the waiter places our drinks in front of us, I take the glass and gulp a big sip of my vodka-orange juice, which is a small relief for my dry throat.

“Um, do you come here often? I haven’t seen you around here before,” I say, breaking the awkward silence between us.

“It’s my first time here, actually. I just moved into the area.” He fumbles with his drink, nearly spilling it.

“Oh, that’s nice.”

“What about you? Do you come here regularly?”

“Yeah, my friend loves this place.”

“Your friend?”

“Yeah, she’s around here somewhere.” My gaze immediately searches the crowd. Where is Katherine? I haven’t seen her anywhere. Usually, I catch a glimpse of her at the bar or on the dance floor, but tonight it’s like she’s disappeared. That’s weird.

“Oh, okay.” The guy wipes his palms on his jeans, and I find it amusing that he’s nervous around me, but it’s also kind of cute.

“Are you a student or do you have a job?” I can’t tell how old he is. He looks around my age, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he was slightly older.

“I... I’m looking for a job, actually.” He shrugs. “College wasn’t for me.”

“Good luck with that, then.” I offer him a smile.

He cocks his head at me, worrying at his lower lip. “You said your name was Lilith. Lilith Barrons?”

“Yeah.” I blink rapidly, surprised that he knows who I am. Sure, I’ve appeared in the press with my father, but people usually don’t recognize me in clubs or on the street unless they’re paying special attention.

“You’re very lucky,” he says, and my eyebrows shoot upward. “I mean, you’re an heiress. You can do and have whatever you want. Must be nice.”

“It is.” I take a sip of my drink. Geez, this is getting awkward.

“Look, I wouldn’t ask... but...” He looks away, licking his lips.

“Ask what?”

“I really need a job... and your father... maybe he needs someone.”

I frown, unsure if the only reason he agreed to dance with me was because he recognized me and thought it was a perfect opportunity to score a job offer. Unfortunately for him, I don’t know if my father is hiring at the moment because that’s not something he talks to me about anyway. “I can talk to my father, but I can’t promise you anything.” I cover his hand with mine, and a smile spreads his lips as he lifts his eyes.

“You’d do that for me? Thank you.”

“Sure. Just give me your contact info.”

He immediately takes out a small card with a name and number on it, and I slip it into my small purse. “Thank you. Really.”

“No problem.” I suddenly don’t feel like talking to him anymore. The relief on his face is too big and I’m sure he isn’t really interested in me. “I’m going to look for my friend now. See you around.”

“Yeah, see you.”

I down the rest of my drink and head toward the dance floor. A couple of guys try to drag me into their arms, but I push them away. I circle around the room, but Katherine is nowhere to be found. I briefly consider calling her, but she told me not to wait for her, so she probably doesn’t want to be bothered, or she’d be somewhere I could see her. Finally, I give up and leave. Maybe I’ll have better luck with guys next time. Or maybe not.