Honoria Ravena (20 page)

“Does the change always hurt wereanimals like that?”

“He’s told me that it hurts, but if he has to heal something, it’s worse. But yes, it always hurts them. They weren’t built for it. While shape-shifters say it feels a lot like orgasm, wereanimals say it’s like torture. And Laedan says it hurts more if it’s not a full moon.”

“It must suck for them.”

“In some ways. But they also gain a lot of power and can survive almost any injury. It’s not all bad.”

I lay down next to Zarek. He wrapped an arm around my waist and smiled at me. “You saved my life.”

I frowned at him. “Well, yes.”

“I didn’t think you would.”

“I thought about letting you die.”

He arched an eyebrow. “Really?”

I shook my head. “No. I’m lying. I didn’t think about that for a second. I thought I might not get to you though. It terrified me. Without your power, I wouldn’t have. I can’t let you die anyway. What’s life without your nagging?”

His lips brushed lightly against mine. “I don’t nag you.”

Someone standing in the door way cleared his throat. We glanced back toward it. Macon leaned heavily against the frame. Blood seeped from a vicious tear in his side.

“When I saw you never made it downstairs, I came up to see if you needed help. I guess you didn’t. The battle has been won, by the way. When the others felt Navarro die, they retreated.” He smirked. “They didn’t get far.”

Zarek grimaced back. “That’s good. Now sit down before you fall down. I hope the troops are in better shape than us.”

“Some are. And they’re procuring willing donors for the ones who aren’t. We had five deaths.”

“Shit. For us that’s a hell of a lot.”

Macon nodded solemnly. “Yes, it is. The toll of this war is going to be bad.”

Epilogue

I clung to Zarek’s hand as my brother slung his duffel bag over his shoulder. I tried to keep the tears from spilling out of my eyes but didn’t quite manage. He was leaving to be one of the King’s Watchers, and I hadn’t been able to keep it together since he’d told me.

“Goddamnit, Regan, will you stop that? I’ll be back. And you have Zarek to keep you occupied.”

I sniffled and silently cursed myself. I wasn’t this weak. “We’ve never been apart for long.”

“I know. But I’ll be saving lives. That’s important to me. As vampire hunters we killed indiscriminately. This way I’ll be killing vamps who deserve it.” He bit his lip. “Besides, seeing how happy you are with Zarek. It just reminds me of what I lost with Liora. She’ll kill me before she accepts me now.”

Zarek made a pained sound. “Jason, if I’d known…”

“You would have turned me anyway. You wanted me to live.” He clapped Zarek on the shoulder. “This isn’t a fate worse than death. I just miss her. I need some time to heal.”

Darius honked the horn, and Natalya smacked him on the back of the head. Faintly, I heard, “He’s saying good-bye to his family. He could die doing this job, don’t be an ass.”

I smiled, but by Jason’s flinch, I could tell it wasn’t a very happy look.

I threw my arms around him. “Be careful, okay?”

He dropped the duffel bag and hugged me back. “I will be. You just be happy.”

I leaned back and swiped at my tears. “You’ll be back for holidays?”

“Every single one. And apparently I get some sort of paid vacation, so I’ll be back for that too.”

I released him and he walked to Darius’ car. I hugged Zarek, but he didn’t hug me back. Strange. Since the fight he had his hands on me constantly, as if afraid of losing me. Laedan said the clinging was starting to gross him out.

I looked up at him. He was staring at me, his eyes filled with pain so intense it wrenched my heart.

“What? What’s wrong?”

He licked his lips and cleared his throat. “You’re free to leave me now. I won’t hold you to me any longer. I frighten you and now I know why you could never be happy with me. I…I love you, and I don’t want to force you to stay with me. I want you happy.”

My arms dropped from around his waist and hung limply at my sides. He was letting me go. I could leave and never set eyes on him again if I pleased. I wouldn’t have to live in the vampire world. The thought thrilled me. I would be free.

But then why did it hurt to breathe? Why did the thought of never seeing Zarek again make my heart sink? Hell, the thought of not hanging out with Laedan anymore made my heart sink. The thought of never being with Zarek again made me want to die.

Zarek turned from me and started to walk away. I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled his back to my front.

“I’m happy where I am.”

He went rigid. “Really? Because if you don’t love me, I want you to go. Just leave now.”

“You couldn’t force me from your side. I do love you, and I intend to spend eternity with you. I think my brother even likes you in his own way. I think we’ll be at peace here.”

He faced me and gripped me in a hug so tight he lifted me off the ground. He pressed his mouth to mine, thrusting his tongue past my lips as I threaded my hands through his hair.

Breaking the kiss, he swept me into his arms. There was no place I’d rather be.

Biography

Multi-published paranormal author Honoria Ravena lives in north Texas. With a cat for a pet who consistently insists on helping her type her stories, she enjoys yoga, belly dancing, a growing addiction to cosmetics, and reading many types of fiction. You may find her on Facebook and Twitter, but do not be surprised if her cat answers you instead, as she never sits still long enough to be found. Visit her at .