Learning to Be Little Again (5 page)

We both took our seats as he said, “Let’s hope everything tastes as savory as it looks.”

“I’ll let you know,” I said, cutting a piece of chicken and scooping up some pasta on my fork too. I ate it and it tasted so delicious! I didn’t say anything at first, though, because I wanted Robert to squirm in his seat a little.

“Well, what do you think?” he asked, sounding eager.

“Don’t eat anything. It’s terrible!” I said, taking another bite, trying to keep a straight face. But the look on his face had me laughing so hard.

He took a bite of his food. “You brat! It tastes perfectly fine.”

“I know. I was just teasing you,” I giggled, taking a sip of wine.

“Very funny. Try a piece of your broccoli.”

“Do I have to?”

“Yes. Come on, it isn’t that bad,” he said, popping a piece into his mouth.

“Fine,” I said, doing the same. I chewed it, swallowed it, and I was speechless. It actually didn’t taste like garbage. It still had that nasty taste, but there was also a sweet taste that made it bearable. It was much better than what Mark normally made, or what I’d tasted at a restaurant.

“So, what do you think?”

“It tastes really yummy! Will you tell me what you did to it now?”

When we’d been cooking, he wouldn’t let me see what he was doing to the broccoli. He said that it was an old family recipe, and no matter how much I groaned and pouted, he wouldn’t tell me.

“Nope. Sorry. Like I said, old family recipe.”

“Awww…please!” I begged. I really wanted to know. If I could make broccoli like this, I would eat it much more often.

“Nope. Now come on, eat some more, and why don’t you tell me more about what you do.”

This was one topic I liked talking about. I loved my job. “I’m the secretary for one of the Vice Presidents at Johnson & Miles Co. I’ve been working there ever since I got out of college, so I’ve been there for four years now. It’s a pretty easy job. I know how my boss, Al, likes things done and we get along very well. He always been so nice to me, even more so after… what happened to me.” I ended that last sentence in a whisper. That wasn’t a topic I wanted to discuss on a first date, let alone ever.

“He does sound like a great boss.”

“Yeah. Well, he has three daughters and they’re all around my age. So, I think that helps.” Deciding to change the subject, I said, “Tell me more about your job.”

“Well, I’m doctor as you know. I’ve been at the same practice since I graduated from medical school. My partners and I all get along, which is great. I’m just a general practitioner. Most of my patients are adults, though I do treat some young ones too. Actually, about a year ago, I started to treat some people in the age play scene.”

I took a big gulp of wine when he mentioned that. I tried not to think about what Boyle had wanted me to do.
Deep breath in, and out. He’s gone
, I told myself as I focused back on the conversation. “Really?”

“Yes. Some people like to play more often and more publicly. I make it easier for them to do so.”

“That’s nice of you,” I said, taking a bite of food.

“Is everything okay?”

I nodded curtly, reached for the dish the broccoli was in, and put some more on my plate.

“Alright, now I know something is wrong. Tell me, please.”

I sighed, knowing that I wasn’t going to get out of not explaining. “Boyle wanted to… take me to his… doctor friend,” I said, in a whisper. I didn’t like talking about these memories, let alone actually thinking about them. It had been such a horrible time of my life.
Who wants to revisit their darkest memories?

“You didn’t want to go?” Robert asked, taking my hand in his.

I nodded, feeling the tears forming behind my eyes. They always seemed to come whenever I thought about the past. “That was the f-f-first time that he t-tied me up and l-left me.” I pulled my hand away from Robert’s to try and wipe the tears away from my eyes, but they just kept coming. I hated crying and it felt like that was all I did anymore.

“Hey. It’s okay. He’s not going to hurt you anymore, baby girl.”

“He could c-come back!” I said, feeling my heart start to pound. That was my worst fear. I didn’t know what I would do if he ever came back.

“Come here, sweetie.” Robert said, pulling me into his arms. He wrapped his arms around me and I instantly began to feel safe and my worries subsided.

Why does this feel so good
?

I stayed there for several minutes until I calmed down. “I’m sorry.”

“There is nothing to be sorry about. As much as I’m sure you hate crying and thinking about what happened in the past, I think it’ll help you get past everything that happened. That’s why I think that you should see a therapist or just talk to someone you can trust.”

I nodded, knowing deep down he was right. I just didn’t get how I could sit down, meet someone for the first time, and spill my guts to him about how I felt and about past experiences.

“You also have to know that if Boyle ever shows his ugly face around here again, he’ll have to deal with me and Mark.”

I pictured the three of them in a fight and knew that Boyle wouldn’t stand a chance in the least. Heck, even if Boyle tried to fight Mark or Robert alone, he would get crushed. I giggled at the thought of him getting crushed within seconds.

“I love your laugh, Juliana. It’s so soft and carefree.”

I blushed at his compliment. “Thanks,” I shyly said, hiding my gaze from his.

“Here, I want you to eat some more food,” Robert said, forking a piece of chicken and pasta from my plate and bringing the food to my mouth. I ate the bite he offered me.

“You don’t have to do this,” I said, trying to get off of his lap as another fork filled with food came towards me.

“I know that I don’t have to, but I want to. Besides, I like you sitting in my lap,” he said, a big smile on his face.

“Okay,” I said, leaning my head against his shoulder and accepting the food.

I had to admit that this was the oddest first date I’d ever been on. Most guys would have been itching to get the date over with after the woman started crying over her ex-boyfriend. But instead, Robert pulled me onto his lap and began feeding me like I was his little girl.

Why a little part of me got excited about being treated as his little girl, I didn’t want to even think about.

Chapter Six

The rest of the meal with Juliana went great. She kept letting me feed her, until finally she turned her head away and I knew she was truly full. Then I let her off of my lap and she helped me put away the leftovers and clean up.

Once we finished that, we walked into her living room and sat down on the couch, deciding to watch TV. As I was flipping through the channels, Juliana placed her head on my shoulder and yawned. I glanced over at her and she looked so cute. Wrapping my arm around her, I continued to flip through the channels, but stopped when she laughed at an infomercial.

“What’s so funny sweetie?”

“That hairbrush!” she said, pointing to the brush on TV. The advertisement said that the brush would be able to get the tangles out of any type of hair. “I bet a million bucks that hairbrush couldn’t get all the tangles out of my hair.”

“Juliana, I’m sure that any hairbrush could get the tangles out of your hair. You just have to brush your hair slowly and be patient if you encounter a tangle.”

“Nope,” she said, picking her head up from my shoulder and shaking it. “The hairbrush I have didn’t even work to get all of the tangles out of my hair tonight!”

“I bet it will if you take your time.”

“I know it won’t.”

“Why don’t you go and get it? I’ll brush your hair and show you that I can get the tangles out by taking my time.”

“Fine, but I’m only doing this to prove that I’m right,” she said, getting up and racing to her bedroom.

I continued flipping through the stations until I landed on one for a rerun of a
Dragon Tales
episode. I decided this would be a good children’s program to watch. I hoped that while watching TV and brushing her hair, I could slowly coax Juliana’s little girl self out. I wanted to show her that along with being a great boyfriend, I would also make a great daddy.

She came racing back into the living room, but stopped when she saw what was on TV. “I don’t like this show. It’s for little kids,” she said, crossing her arms against her chest.

This was going to be harder than I’d thought. I didn’t want to push her too far tonight, but I didn’t want to give up yet. “I don’t think so. Personally, I always thought it was fun to visit a new place that had nice dragons.”

She looked at me like I was crazy, which I might have been. But, if being crazy was what I had to be to get her little girl self to come out, then so be it.

“Now, can you please sit down on the ground with your back pressed up against the couch so I can show you that with patience, this hairbrush can get all the tangles out of your hair?” I asked and held my hand out for her hairbrush.

“Fine, but I’m warning you, you’re going to be proven wrong,” she said, handing me the brush.

“We’ll see,” I said as she sat down on the ground in between my legs and I began to slowly brush her hair. Juliana was right; her curly hair did have plenty of tangles in it. But, like I told her, with patience I would get them all out.

At first, she sat up straight and I could tell by the angle of her head she wasn’t watching TV. But within ten minutes, she had her head leaning against one of my knees and I knew she was watching it.

A few minutes later, her right thumb popped into her mouth. I couldn’t help the smile that crossed my face. I knew that watching the children’s program would coax her little side out, and I doubted she knew she was sucking her thumb right now. It made me happy that she felt comfortable enough to allow me to see her like this. It showed me just how much she needed to act like a little girl, even if she wanted to deny it.

I finished getting all the tangles out of her hair within half an hour. But I kept brushing her hair because I was sure it felt pleasant to her and I wanted her to relax and get used to my touch.

After another five minutes, I knew she was sound asleep. Her breathing evened out when the third episode of
Dragon Tales
began, and so I just sat there, still brushing her long, curly locks and wondering how someone could harm someone so innocent and beautiful. I’d told Juliana the truth tonight—that if Boyle ever showed his face around here again, he would have to answer to me.

Even though we had only been on one date, I cared for Juliana greatly. I knew that it was going to take some time to convince her that I would never hurt her, but she was worth it. Putting the hairbrush down, I thought about how I could show her that being my little girl was a good thing. It was going to be a hard task to do, but I knew I was up to the challenge.

Before I knew it, two hours had passed. Sadly, I had to go and that meant that I would have to wake Juliana up. I leaned down and whispered in her ear, “Baby girl, you have to wake up now. It’s time for me to go.”

She jumped a little and then looked up at me with sleepy eyes. “W-what?” she asked, rubbing her eyes with her two little fists. She looked absolutely adorable.

“It’s about ten. I have an early morning tomorrow, and you need to get your sleep.”

“Did I fall asleep?” she asked, scrunching her eyebrows together as she tried to think about it.

“Yes. After the third episode of
Dragon Tales,
you fell asleep against my knee. By the way, I got all of the tangles out of your hair.”

She ran her fingers through her curls and looked surprised that I was telling the truth. Then she looked up at me with sad eyes and said, “I’m so sorry! I wrecked this entire night.”

Wrecked this night? Doesn’t she know that she made my night?
“No, you didn’t. You looked so cute when you were sleeping. Besides, I can say as a doctor that the prescription to fix those dark circles under your eyes is lots of and lots of sleep.”

“But—” she began, but I cut her off.

“No buts. It was a perfect night. I wouldn’t have changed a single thing.”

“Okay,” she said, getting up and walking toward the door.

I slowly followed, not wanting to leave yet even though I had to.

“Thank you for a wonderful night,” she said, opening the door.

“You’re welcome. Thank you too.”

“You’re welcome.”

We stood there, like two fools. I didn’t want to leave and I could tell that she didn’t want me to leave yet either. So I decided now was as good a time as any to follow my instincts. I gently grabbed her face in my hands and brought my lips down to hers. Her lips were so soft. She tasted like the sweetest thing I’d ever tasted and all I wanted was more. My tongue licked across her bottom lip, and when she hesitantly opened her mouth, my tongue dove in.

I felt her hands slide up into my hair and tighten. This was perfect. I pulled her closer to me, wanting to deepen the kiss.

I wanted to stay like that forever, connected to this beautiful woman, but I knew we couldn’t… tonight. I pulled away, both of us panting for air.

“W-wow,” she whispered, touching her swollen lips.

Just like that, my pride swelled as I knew I’d been the one to put that look on her face. “Yeah, wow.”

“Do you want to do this again tomorrow?” she blurted and then I watched as her face turned bright red.

I couldn’t help the smile that crossed my face. She was just too adorable for her own good. “Absolutely. I’ll be here at six again, if that’s okay with you.”

“That works great for me.”

“Alright. Now I want you to lock this door right after I leave and go straight to bed. You need your sleep, doctor’s orders.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Goodnight, Juliana,” I said, opening the door and stepping out of it.

“Goodnight, Robert,” she said as she closed the door.

I waited to make sure I heard the click of the lock. When I did, I walked to the elevator. As I waited for it, I couldn’t help but think once again how perfect Juliana was for me. She was shy at first, but once I got her to open up, I could tell she was someone who was adventurous and full of life.