Madness (Revenge Series Book 3) (25 page)

BOOK: Madness (Revenge Series Book 3)

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I will not deny that I experienced some kind of mental trauma over the course of my time spent with Nikolai. Yet all I can feel is this incredible sense of loss. The unimaginable pain of his absence and the hurt of not knowing what really would have happened between us is all I can think about on those dark days. And when I first returned to Blythe Harbor, those days existed more than they didn’t. Today, though, it’s rare that I will allow myself to submerge back into missing Nikolai. I’m not sure if that is moving on or simply learning to live with the pain. Either way, I am functioning, and most days, I’m okay.

I’ve come to the conclusion that I will always miss him. I miss his deep voice and the way it would hypnotize me. The way he would internally struggle with what he wanted to do and what he should do. I miss his touch, and I’d be lying to myself if I didn’t admit that I miss the adventure. We were tethered through vengeance, and against all odds, we both came out of it alive.

“You look so tired, Joss.” Gabe says interrupting my thoughts. “Maybe you should go to bed early.”

“That’s probably a good idea.”

I don’t have the energy to argue with him, and I pull my legs from his lap then stand from the couch. My muscles ache, and I can barely keep my eyes open. I lean down and kiss Gabe on the lips. My soul warms, and when I look into his brown irises, all I can feel is his love. He loves me, and I’m starting to love him, too. It wasn’t instantaneous, but like the tall maple trees behind my house, it grows and blooms a little every day. It’s taken me a while, but I can finally understand what Nikolai wanted for me. He told me to live, and for the first time in many, many years, that’s what I intend to do—live.

.*.*.*.

Nikolai

March 18, 2016 5:47 a.m.

The bullets are flying all around us. Cubby and I are pinned down, hidden behind a small barrier to keep from getting shot. The Mirza brothers have caught up with me and are seeking their own revenge for the murder of their brother Zahir. I’m still not sure how they knew it was me, but I suppose it has something to do with my presence at the auction the day Josslyn was taken there.

For the first several months after I parted ways with her, all the underground could talk about was Stravinsky’s murder. The Vory V Zakone’s biggest and most influential leader was killed in his own house in an inexplicable way, and the few remaining members are struggling to find the men responsible for his death. That will eventually blow back on me, but for the time being, I have to deal with the Mirza brothers and get my ass out of another mess.

I pull the clip from my pistol and click a new one in place. Cubby and I are shoulder to shoulder as we hover behind a piece of steel in the broken down building we ran into. I scan my eyes across the room, looking for a place to exit, but there’s isn’t a good exit without getting shot. We are truly pinned.

The sound of their guns silences, and Cubby winks over at me. He swiftly turns his hulking frame around and pulls a small throwing knife from his pocket. As fast and deadly as lightening, Cubby hurls the blade across the room, plunging it into the man’s jugular. I raise my eyebrows and then give him my nod of approval.
Nice shot,
I think to myself. Then, with my eyes, I say,
but watch this.
I pull my small blade from the sheath then place it in the palm of my hand. The other brother screams out his anger, and as he’s about to fire his gun, I wrench my hand back and chuck the knife. The razor sharp blade penetrates his hand, causing him to drop his gun and wail out in agony. Suddenly, he jerks out another gun with his good hand, and before he can react again, I pull another knife from my pocket and hurl it across the room. His hand is pierced and matches the other.

Cubby and I move from behind our shield and slowly walk to the Mirza brother. His hands are bleeding, and he has to know what’s about to happen as we make our way closer to him. We will kill him and then we will move on with the rest of our lives, living in the wind as assassins and criminal opportunists.

I motion with my finger and say, “Now we can have a little fun with this asshole before he ends up like his brother.” I kick the dead body at my feet and crouch down in front of the man balled on the ground. “Did you hear that? It’s time for a little fun.”

“Are you going to show him your specialty?” Cubby asks as he’s restraining the man on the floor.

“Oh, yes. I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t.” I look over at the blubbering man and lean in close. My voice is seething, and my killer persona is fully set in. “Do you want to see what my specialty is?” The man shakes his head, but it makes me smile wickedly. “I hate to disappoint you, my friend, but it will be impossible for you not to see when I take your eye.”

I pull a small scalpel from the pocket of my pants and pull the cover off the blade. The muted light sparkles as I twist the weapon just right and allowing the wilted man to see the deadly side of the blade. I place my hand on his head as Cubby holds it in place. The tip is about to penetrate the watery bulb inside his socket when my phone vibrates inside my pocket. I look down and note the time on my watch, which tells me exactly who’s calling me. The 360 area code comes across the screen every day. I hold my breath, waiting to hear the voice on the other end.

“Really?” Cubby questions, knowing this will have to wait. Whatever we are doing will always wait because this is and will always be the upmost important interaction of my day.

I stand and open my phone. “Black,” I snap into the phone.

“Sir,” Aleksandr Makarova says on the other end. “Detective Stowe has arrived home and appears to be settling in for the night.”

“Thank you. I will speak to you tomorrow.”

“You’re welcome, sir.” The line goes dead, relief washing over me from knowing she’s okay.

I made a promise to Josslyn nearly the moment I met her. I told her I would always protect her, no matter where she was or what she was doing, I would always be watching her. And I meant every word. I haven’t done this world much good since I graced it with my presence thirty-seven years ago, but protecting her life is one thing I have. She awakened an undiscovered part of me, and my dark soul couldn’t help being attracted to her light. If I do anything right in my existence, it will be keeping her walking on this earth. The last words I spoke to her will always reside deep inside my heart. That is where I hold her now: in the quiet of my heart, tucked away from everyone else. Every night when I close my eyes, I reflect on the final words I shared with her. I told Josslyn to live. And that is exactly what I am protecting: a person who deserves to live.

M.S. Brannon
was born and raised in the Midwest. She still resides there today with her wonderful husband and son. When she is not writing or reading, M.S. Brannon spends time with her family, goes to the movies, and discovers new music. She writes romance because she believes love and heartache are the rawest emotions one can experience.