My Life Without Garlic (7 page)

Only, Tony wasn’t so annoying.

Unless he tried to kill Augustin when they got to wherever they were going. Then, yeah, annoying.

But Tony plopped Augustin down on a soft surface, then Augustin was blinking as the black material was pulled away.

“You must be injured somehow,” Tony muttered.

Augustin turned his head and looked at Tony—and gasped.

“Yeah, yeah, I look gross,” Tony said. “The sun kills us, as I’m sure you’re aware. The material is supposed to block UV rays but it never works as well as advertised.”

Augustin couldn’t speak then, not when he was seeing the huge blisters that had risen up on Tony’s face and body. Guilt hit him like a Mack truck rolling over a Matchbox car. The blisters looked horrible, painful—and they were his fault.

Chapter Thirteen

Tony was
pissed!
And relieved. But mostly
pissed!
He freaking hated sunburns!

No, wait, he was relieved more than anything. Augustin could have died out in the desert.

Tony narrowed his eyes at the sweat-soaked man. “You didn’t even get a goddamned sunburn!”

Augustin threw his hands up. “I’m sorry! I can go back outside and lay in the sand for half an hour, would that make you happy?”

“Maybe!” Tony huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, then hissed and uncrossed them. “Is there anywhere I’m not half cooked?”

“That would work better as half baked—never mind,” Augustin quickly said. “Stop glaring like that. Your eyes are especially red and creepy.”

Tony covered his creepy eyes with his hands. “Jesus, I can’t catch a break. At least I almost staked Chelsea. That’s a plus in this fucked-up day.”

Augustin sat up. “Almost? Can you try again?”

“No, it was a freak accident when we went through the ceiling. One of the beams broke and a spear of it went through her side. She’s already over it.” Tony pointed at Augustin. “Don’t even ask it. No, I will not try ramming her through the ceiling again. If you want to try, have at it. We’re on the second floor, you can rip a hole going down.”

“Are you saying I’m fat?” Augustin asked.

Tony really didn’t like that tone. “I’m saying you can try to kill Chelsea. I’m taking a break from it for a while. I need blood, I need sleep and I need to not have these nasty blisters all over. If there’s one on my balls or…anywhere like that, there’ll be hell to pay.”

“I’d have thought those parts would be covered up extra well.” Augustin pulled his knees up and wrapped an arm around them as he sat. “I’m not giving you blood, but I could maybe put something on those blisters for you.”

Tony raised an eyebrow and even that hurt. “Ow. Man, ow. And also, no, because you’d pop one then scream and get mad because you got blister juice on you.”

Augustin snickered. “I’m not that much of a… I mean, it’d be gross, but I’ve had my niece crap on me more times than I can count. Those babies are just poopin’ machines. And puking, they do that a lot. And the slobber—”

“I just need blood, but barring that, I’ll sleep. I can’t fly out and find a donor, and Chelsea won’t share hers.” Tony shuddered. “I wouldn’t even ask.”

“By donor, do you mean she keeps someone here to…to feed off of?” Augustin asked.

Tony grinned. “Yeah. Several of the vampires do. How do you feel about being a permanent resident?”

Augustin let go of his knees to grab a pillow and chuck it at Tony.

Tony dodged it easily enough, but any movement was very uncomfortable.

“I was feeling bad about the blisters, but screw that!” Augustin grabbed another pillow.

“They’re here voluntarily,” Tony said. “Put the pillow down, Augustin. Stop acting like a child.”

Augustin sputtered.

Tony removed his pants.

“Oh.” Augustin didn’t say anything else, which was a blessing, as far as Tony was concerned.

He had blisters on his hips, and his butt, he could feel those. His legs weren’t looking so studly, either. “Shit.”

“I’m back to feeling bad. But this isn’t about me,” Augustin said, waving a hand at Tony. “If you sleep, will that heal you all up?”

“If, after I sleep, I find someone willing to let me drink a little blood,
that
will heal me up. Unlike Chelsea and the other mated vampires, I don’t have a donor here. Do I?” Tony planted his hands
veeeerrrry
carefully above the blisters on his hips.

Augustin shrugged. “I think you said as much. And you called those other ones mates, the donors—mates, so I guess that means we aren’t. Mates.”

Tony’s head ached too much for this shit. “What are you babbling about now? What does them being mates have to do with us?”

“Exactly!” Augustin said with what really sounded like false enthusiasm.

Tony was so confused.

“If you vampires have mates, then we aren’t mates, me and you.” Augustin nodded.

Tony settled in for a discussion when he really just wanted to sleep, but… “This I gotta hear. Explain your logic to me.”

Augustin scowled at him. “It’s not complicated. You met me, didn’t look in my eyes and fall head over heels in love with me. You didn’t look at me and see your other half, didn’t have that— Why in the hell are you laughing at me?”

Tony wished he wasn’t laughing, because—
pain.
He got his amusement under control. “Where the hell did you come up with that idea of how mates work?”

“Don’t be an ass. It’s like that in the movies. And books. Some books. There’s the destined mates, soul mates, fated mates, whatever. Stop laughing!” Augustin hoisted the pillow up.

Tony shook his head. “Don’t, or I won’t show you where the bathroom is. You can smell yourself and, well, deal with no bathroom until I get up when it’s dark.”

Augustin put the pillow down. “Wow, that’s as mean as something I’d do. I’m impressed.”

“That’s only a peek at my fierce temper.” Not exactly the truth, but Tony would lie until his tongue fell out if it got Augustin to just stay put instead of running out in that desert again. “And as for mates, no. It’s the same as if you’d met someone. Two people meet, they date, hang out, fall in love, decide to be together forever. Of course, once that happens and there’s a blood exchange, then there’s a bond. It’s all voluntary up until then.”

“What happens after that?” Augustin asked. “It sounds ominous.”

“I don’t even know what that means, but the mates are happy with each other and live alongside each other. If one dies, the other does, too. They’re bound together and they love each other, so stop with the whole destiny thing, and stop thinking we keep blood donors here for only that purpose.” Tony yawned. “That’s why we have the dating site. Easier to meet people open to our kind that way.”

“So you were looking for someone to date?” Augustin asked. “I’m assuming you had a profile there, right?”

Tony stopped himself from shrugging. The yawn had been uncomfortable enough. “Sure. All the single vamps here, and from most other covens register on there. Who doesn’t want to be loved and love in return?”

Augustin sniffled. “Wow. I didn’t think you had a heart. I mean, I didn’t feel it beating when we were, um, messing around. Not that I listened, but that’s beside the point.”

“What
is
your point?” Tony asked.

Augustin didn’t answer right away. “I need to think about that.”

“Well, you think while I sleep. The bathroom is right there.” He pointed at a door to the left. “You could have found it on your own if you’d have gotten up and walked over there.”

Tony left Augustin there on the bed, scowling, and looking entirely too tempting. It was early still but sleep was better than staying up and getting insulted. He left the room then headed downstairs, pondering his fascination with Augustin. He really needed to do something about his attraction to difficult, moody men. Tony had a weak spot for them.

“I take it that was a no go on the feeding?” Claude asked, hovering at the base of the stairs.

“Funny, I was just thinking about you,” Tony said. He’d been hung up on Claude for a while, but was over him now.

“Good thoughts?” Claude wiggled his eyebrows.

Tony gave him a blank look. “I was thinking I needed to get over liking difficult men. Take that however you want to.”

“Oh, ouch,” Claude said, slapping a hand over his heart. “And here I stayed up just in case I was right, and Augustin was a heartless little, er, big shit who wouldn’t help heal you from those painful blisters you got rescuing him.”

“He wouldn’t have needed rescuing if we hadn’t fucked up at his place.” Tony started for the stairs.

Claude stopped him, holding out a wrist. “Go ahead. I’m the only one who can do this for you. Barring, of course, that difficult human you seem to be attracted to.”

Since Claude had made him, it was true that he could also heal Tony. And with a lot less blood. “Thank you, sire.” Tony hardly ever used the respectful title, so when he did, Claude knew how sincere he was.

“Gentle, you know I detest pain,” Claude said right before Tony bit down.

Tony let his fangs just pierce the skin, then sink in a little deeper. Claude’s blood hit him like the strongest whiskey, making his head spin, his body heal, and his dick hard.

That knowing smile Claude wore only made Tony ache more for a lover’s touch.

“But not mine,” Claude said. “Even on a blood rush, it isn’t me you want.”

Tony lapped at the bite but it healed before his tongue touched it.

“Sweet boy,” Claude told him. “Go snuggle with your human. Maybe he’ll be struck into submission, or at least be nice, once he gets an eye on this.” Claude fisted Tony’s dick. “Or a mouth. I bet he’d love to suck you.”

Tony was vibrating inside on the blood high. It made his nerves sing with the promise of pleasure, and his skin, his hearing, his vision—all of his senses became very acute.

He could hear Augustin closing the shower door.

Tony grinned. When Augustin got out, he was going to have two hundred pounds of naked, horny and persuasive man in his bed.

It was going to be fun or dangerous—or both. Tony rubbed his dick in anticipation, then went into the room to wait.

Chapter Fourteen

Augustin scrubbed himself from head to toe twice while he thought over everything that had happened. Really, if the vampires had wanted him dead, he’d have been offed at the start, right? When he’d had that embarrassing fainting spell, for example. They could have drained him then, torched his apartment…

“Ick, stop it.” Sometimes having a vivid imagination sucked ass. Seeing himself in the throes of death wasn’t what Augustin wanted to be thinking about.

He rinsed the last of the soap off his body. He really hadn’t even gotten pink. There for a short while outside, he’d believed he was baking, but it must have been a flush from the heat.

Tony, however, had suffered. For him. Oh sure, maybe Tony hadn’t wanted him to get away and blab— But Augustin wasn’t an idiot. He wouldn’t have survived in the desert for long. No one would believe him if he did ever tell of this…adventure. There were probably groups of weirdo vampire hunters—haters were everywhere nowadays—and he wouldn’t trust them. They’d probably stake him in some warped ‘associating with the bad guys’ way.

“I like rooting for the underdog anyway,” he muttered. Hell, most of the time,
he
was the underdog. Being overweight and too close to middle age didn’t exactly make him popular.

He rolled his eyes. And fine, okay. Sometimes…often…his mouth got him in trouble. Being born a natural smartass was a gift and a curse.

Augustin toweled off and grumbled when he didn’t find a new toothbrush. He’d be damned if he used the dingy, yellow-bristled one in the cup by the sink. He’d probably get hepatitis or something like that from blood residue on it.

“Gross, gross, gross!” He opened the medicine cabinet and found mouthwash. It hadn’t been opened, so he considered it a double win. That way he could swig from the cup it came with and not worry about cooties.

His stomach growled while he was finishing up in the bathroom. He tilted his head, certain that he had heard the bedroom door, but when no other noise occurred, he went back to brushing his hair.

Then he tried looking over his shoulder at his butt. He knew he had more than a handful, as one ex had said. It hadn’t been a complaint, either.

In fact, none of his lovers had bitched about his butt. His mouth, and the snark that came out of it, now, that was another matter.

Augustin reached behind and jiggled each cheek. “She’s just jealous because she’s got pancake ass.” He gave one side a slap. “Yeah, this is hot, baby.”

He nodded. He wasn’t perfect looking, but he wasn’t awful, either.

Tony was seriously sexy, though.
Not with the blisters. That was disturbing. And my fault, damn it. Ugh!

All right, he owed Tony. He could be nice to the man. Not nice as in, sure, suck my blood.

But he could agree to let Tony suck something else.

“Perv,” he muttered to himself as he opened the door, his dick just starting to perk up.

Then it did a complete salute when he stepped out and saw a very naked, wholly healed up and completely predatory man on the bed. “T-Tony—” Oh no. He did not just stutter like a nervous virgin.

Tony gave him a wicked, wicked grin. “Come here, Auggie.”

“Auggie?” Augustin had flayed lesser men for shortening his name, but Tony was naked and perfect and—
Look at that long, fat, curved dick!
There was an almost audible sound in Augustin’s head of his libido murdering his snarky brain cells.

“Gus, then,” Tony said. “Come here,” he repeated. “I won’t bite.”

“That’s a no on Gus, too.” Augustin narrowed his eyes at Tony. “Vampire jokes aren’t a turn-on, either.”

Tony nodded at him. “Your dick is so hard I bet it aches. Mine does.” He began to stroke his shaft. “Just from thinking about you, naked. Horny. Quiet except for moans.”

“Hey.” Augustin blinked. “Was that an insult? Where’d the blisters go?” He got a little jealous, not that he was going to admit it out loud. “Who’d you suck? I mean—”