No Such Thing as a Lost Cause (34 page)

And with sudden clarity, I knew.

I unwrapped my arms from around his neck and straightened my spine, closed my eyes
and said a silent prayer.
God, give me the strength to get through this without chocolate.
And then I began. “I love you, Nick, and that will never change. But I’m an all or
nothing kind of girl, and I won’t settle for anything less than all of you. So, until
you’re willing to take that leap of faith, and commit to someone, something,
anything,
we don’t have a prayer of making it.” My voice began to crack, betraying the resolve
I’d so carefully constructed. “I’m going to miss you, Nick. Be safe, and have a good
trip.”

His expression was stoic, but there was no mistaking the pain reflected in his eyes.
“Eres el amor de mi vida, Angel. I want to give you what you want. What you deserve.
I just don’t think I’m capable of it. I’m sorry. I don’t want to leave you like this.”

“You’re not. I’m leaving you.”

*****

“Yo, Sunshine. Look alive!”

“I can’t move. I think I twisted my ankle.”

“You can’t move because you’ve been buried under a blanket of TASTYKAKE wrappers for
the past three days, and your nonstop crying has sapped you of all your strength.
Believe me, Bran, no guy is worth that amount of crying.”

“I wasn’t crying over Nick. I was crying because all the cupcakes are gone.”

“Uh huh.” John squinted and pulled his baseball cap down over his eyes. The afternoon
sun cast stubby shadows on the Art Museum steps as we stretched our out-of- shape
bodies in preparation for the long trek up. “You ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.” I knew John was only trying to help, but I longed to climb back
into bed and watch Reality TV until my brain turned to apple sauce.

I’d left Nick’s apartment without a backwards glance and managed to make it all the
way to the elevator before dissolving into a soggy little heap.

I knew he felt awful. But he would never promise something he couldn’t make good on,
and I never would have wanted him to. I just wished he could.

“Race you there.” John took a tentative step up. “Whoo hoo! Only seventy-one more
to go.”

My pocket began to vibrate. “Hang on,” I said. “My phone’s ringing. Hello?”

“Brandy? ”

“Yes?”

“This is Judy Harrison, from Jacob’s Place. How are you?”

Super depressed, actually. Nick has commitment issues and I’m going to die alone.
“Great, thanks. Are you calling about Popeye?”

“I am. When Mr. Santiago came to pick him up, we forgot to give him a copy of the
adoption papers. He said he was going out of town and wouldn’t be reachable. I was
hoping to drop off the papers with you.”

“Nick adopted Popeye? When did this happen?”

“Day before yesterday. I’m sorry. I thought you knew. This has been a real blessing.
He’s the only person Popeye has responded to. I warned Mr. Santiago that it was a
big commitment, but he said he wanted to do it…and he mentioned something about a
leap of faith. Not sure what he meant by that.”

My heart filled with inexpressible joy. “I do, Mrs. Harrison. I do.”

Lifting my eyes to the mountainous stairway, I took off running, taking the steps
two at a time, never stopping until I reached the top.

SHELLY FREDMAN is a native Philadelphian who long dreamed to be Mrs. Illya Kuryakin
from The Man From U.N.C.L.E. Having failed to reach that lofty goal, she switched
her affections to fictional characters and situations that she could control with
the stroke of her keyboard. This quest for power resulted in The No Such Thing As…Brandy
Alexander Mysteries.

Shelly and Brandy share feelings of pride in their hometown, and even though Shelly
has moved to the west coast, she has always been, and forever will be, a Philly girl
at heart.