Own (Command Force Alpha #1) (19 page)

It didn’t feel like she was working toward an orgasm from him. She’d gone down on guys where the sole purpose was to make them come and move on. This…now…

With Evan was different. Even different than the last time they’d been together, when she had been learning her body and his with all the eagerness of someone new to sex. Now she knew about sex, and she knew what a marvel he really was. It wasn’t like this with all men. It would never be like this with anyone else.

She stopped that thought cold.

Instead, she returned to her present self, wrapped in a body made of flesh and skin and the orders that kept her on her knees. Orders given and orders taken. He was going to do more, at his pace. She got to simply
be
.

He wrapped his hands around the back of her head, fingers twining through her hair. “There, Kat. Feel how hard I am. I’m going to fuck your mouth. You might choke on my cock,” he said, as plainly as possible, “but you won’t stop and you won’t back away.”

She shuddered against his blunt statement. Her nipples were so tight that they tingled. Blooming heat spread out from her core. Squeezing her knees together only increased the throbbing pressure…so she did it again and hid her smile against Evan’s so-sensitive skin. She’d have her turn.

He’d all but promised that with his filthy words.

His fingers tensed across her skull when she sucked him deeper. He found a rhythm, holding her head still while his hips rocked. She opened her mouth only wide enough to let that beautiful length stroke in and out of her lips. When he paused with the thick head against her bottom lip, she darted the tip of her tongue across it.

He hissed in a breath. “Such a pretty, dirty girl.”

He filled her mouth up again. His taste spread across her tongue—saltwater that had been cut with regular water until it was a hint of the whole ocean to come.

She opened her eyes and found Evan staring down at her. His lips were parted on a soft expression of wonder. Tucked against his wide chest, his morning stubble chin was sharp with tension. He rubbed his thumb over her cheek where it had hollowed with each suck.

“Right there,” he murmured. “My cock in your mouth. Such a beautiful mouth.”

She hummed her approval, and hummed again when he shook with pleasure. His hips jolted. It might have been a harder thrust than he’d intended, but she loved that. Making him lose control. Making him
take
her.

His prick nudged the back of her throat once. It took four attempts before Kat loosened her throat. She took him all the way in, marveling at the overwhelming feeling. He was controlling her to the point of breath. At his mercy. If he stayed there too long, she really would choke. Nothing existed except the way they were connected.

She shivered when pleasure folded onto pleasure. Her pussy clenched so hard that she thought she could come from this alone. She didn’t want that. She wanted his mouth on her cunt, licking her with entirely more delicacy than the way he was treating her.

She wrapped her hands around the backs of his thighs, where manly hair gave way to slightly softer skin. He was still rough though. All man. Skin over muscle and the barely padded curves of his ass.

“You take me so well.” His words were so quiet that she wasn’t sure she was supposed to hear them. Maybe they were for him alone. Maybe right now she was only a mouth to be used.

She shuddered. Shakes took her from head to toe.

He didn’t slow his rhythm. He was getting close. She could tell by the way he tensed and found a pattern. Two deep strokes that pushed into her throat, then three shallower, piercing thrusts. Over and over.

“Hold still, Katsu.” His voice was gravel over glass, so broken and rough that her skin washed over with goose bumps. “You’re about to take it. Take my come.” He groaned, gasping for air.

The tendons at the backs of his thighs locked. The sloped curve leading to his shoulders pounced into stark relief. His pecs stood out—thick panels of muscle. But she loved his stomach the most. He was cut, all skin and muscle. Not an ounce of fat. She spread her hand across his abs, with her thumb and index finger around his shallow navel. She was touching the most strength she’d ever known, all of it flexing and flexing until he froze.

His orgasm broke free across her tongue, lash after lash. He bathed her tongue with more of that saltiness. She rolled her eyes closed, the better to savor it. To savor him.

“There. Good girl. So good,” he ground out. His hands were folded around the sides of her head, but she wasn’t going anywhere he didn’t want her to.

That meant she stayed on her knees until he reached for her, wrapping his hands under her arms and hauling her up. Unsteady at first, she clung to him as feeling returned to her legs. He pressed her against the wall with his body against hers. She felt it then, his strumming, fast-beating heart where it pounded his rhythm into her chest.

They kissed. His tongue swept over her bottom lip, then delved into her mouth where she still held his taste. He held her for a long minute, breathless. Their gasps wove together in the steamy bathroom.

“Damn, Katsu.” He chuckled, sounding stunned. “You can talk now, by the way.”

She buried her smile against his chest. “Still not fair that you’re allowed to cuss and I’m not.”

“Technically you’re not barred from cussing. There’s just a price. You have to decide what it’s worth for a good old-fashioned ‘fuck’ now and then.” His hands chased over her shoulders and her back, then down to squeeze her ass. Her last orgasm seemed days away, not hours. Or minutes.

She was both greedy and patient. As long as he wanted to hold her, she wanted to stay there. The water of the shower sealed them together. It had darkened his hair, turning it from golden to rich and dramatic.

He thought he was so damn enigmatic, but she could see the moment his thoughts turned back toward finishing his promises. He gripped her ass more tightly, and his breathing hastened. Tendons and muscles locked under her draped body.

“Let go of me,” he ordered in a tone calm enough that her stomach took a funny flip. “Stand here against the wall.”

She swallowed hard against the rock in her throat. Anticipation had her bound and waiting. She could barely blink past the shower mist that clung to her lashes. But she obeyed.

“Spread your legs.”

The insides of her thighs tensed against the pressure of straining to shoulder width. She’d already worked hard, holding herself upright on the bed. She was shaky.

He didn’t care.

“Wider.”

She gulped and still did it, so far that she felt slightly off balance. He liked her that way, it seemed, because he sank to his knees. The position didn’t diminish him, not when he flashed her a wolfish smile. A muscle bounced in front of his ear.

“Touch yourself. Two fingers. Stroke your pretty pussy.”

Her skin was slick with want. She petted her plump lower folds. Under his burning gaze, the touch amplified into tingles and surges of pleasure.

“Spread your lips. Use both hands. Hold yourself open for me.”

She swallowed against so much dryness in her mouth that a noise clicked in her throat. The air in their small shower was wet and hot, but it still had nothing on her. She wanted him. Every bit of her wanted him.

He purred his approval…and licked.

Oh God, how he licked.

Kat’s head dropped back against the shower tiles. Other times, other places, other men—they all faded. He sucked her clit between his teeth and pressed it with the flat of his tongue. But it wasn’t just mechanics. It was the transported pleasure on his face and the way he stared intently up at her. Only moments ago she’d been on her knees following his every order and he’d been exhilarated. There’d been no missing that. But this…now…

She had no words. He was
erotic
. He…clenched. Pushed. Tensed. Motions drew his body into divots and shadows and pools where moisture collected, all so he could pull an extra fraction of sensation from her helpless body.

“Show me how much you appreciate my muscles.”

She gasped on a laugh. “That’s not arrogant at all.” But she dug her fingers into taut, resilient flesh. He flexed against her pinches and grasping squeezes.

“Run your fingers through my hair.”

More orders. Always more orders.
Yes.

His hair felt like wet silk. It clung to her fingers. She had to calm herself to keep from tugging.

He rubbed her clit with two fingers, a side-to-side motion she’d never used on herself. At first she thought it wouldn’t work. Those words rose to her tongue, ready to tell him. But pleasure caught her by the back of the neck and rocked through her, twisting her into someone she hardly knew. Her chest refused to allow a gasping, begging breath as she sought the moment of promise—a moment of pleasure she’d never imagined.

“It’s time, Katsu. Time to come.”

She screamed when he speared his tongue into her gate. She sobbed when she came. She buried her face against his chest when he stood, and hid her tears among the spray of the shower.

The tears weren’t for him. They were for her, in mourning over how easily he was going to break her heart again.

Chapter Eighteen

Evan led Katsu up the private elevator and down the corridor at Mass General until they reached the secured ICU. Shower sex hadn’t been strong enough to put their awkward morning to rest, no matter how fantastic. They were tiptoeing around each other and the thorny subjects that kept them apart. This business with the colonel wasn’t over. Someone knew Kat’s identity. Though he was the unofficial second-in-command of their ad hoc unit, Evan was tied up guarding her rather than chasing down leads.

And, on an intensely personal level, Evan had no idea what to do about his relationship with Kat.

They had great sex. They even had fun together. But they’d had that four years ago.

Quit lying to yourself.

This wasn’t the same. This was more intense and hit more raw places within his psyche. If he forced the issue, he could admit to himself that he wanted to dominate a woman. It was fetish-level deep. He’d enjoyed a few brief flings with willing partners, but they’d either made a joke of “yes, Master” and “yes, Sir,” or they’d wanted him to intensify domination to ownership when he wasn’t ready.

He wanted to own a woman.

He wanted to own
Katsu
.

No way. That was as impossible as settling down on his little farm. She was the colonel’s daughter, first of all, and he wouldn’t risk their respective relationships for anything. Second, he could be sent to God-knew-where by the end of the day. Katsu might try to convince herself that she could hack it, but how could they make such a deeply intimate connection work across thousands of miles and months of silence?

She seemed more than willing, though, which blew his rationality to bits he constantly had to tape back together. He had remained in control during their shower because the entire time she hadn’t moved except when he told her to.

Run your fingers through my hair.

Show me how much you appreciate my muscles.

Spread your lips.

It’s time now, Katsu. Time to come.

Evan had only needed to pump his fingers a few more times before her sweet, hot juices spilled over his tongue. He drank her like he would the finest champagne, but with no grace. Only greed.

He’d picked her outfit afterwards, because she seemed determined to walk around the safe house naked until he did. Her open suitcase on his bed was more like a mallet to the head than a hint.

They hadn’t talked about it, but they were playing a dangerous D/s game, one that, by painful definition, would need to end. There would be no dating Katsu, no falling for her, no owning her. Period.

For now, it was danger and sex, and the tenuous connection that intertwined their lives for years—Colonel Nicky Stafford.

Evan was probably too curt with everyone when they arrived at the ICU. His head was preoccupied, and his dick was eager for more. When the fuck had he lost focus so badly?

Snow was waiting in the miniature waiting room, as was one of Fletch’s assistants and Dr. Bascombe. The large man with the reassuring baritone smiled as the double doors closed behind them. His voice could be as booming as thunder and as soft as cotton. His bedside manner was as legendary as his skill. “Evan, Kat, it’s good you’re here. He’s just waking up again.”

“I can’t stay,” Evan said, as much to Kat as to the doctor. “I’m needed at HQ.”

“Great,” Kat mumbled.

Snow smirked. She never showed her teeth, instead smiling with the most taunting lips in the world. She had no soul behind her eyes, which was one of her greatest assets. Aside from Alex, she was the best assassin Command Force Alpha had. No one would ever suspect. She was as short and thin as Kat, wearing a stylish coat, a frilly scarf the colors of autumn to match her hair, and a modest wool skirt, tights and flats. “Evan’s in trouble. Gotta go report to Fletch. Poor you.”

Kat shot Evan a questioning frown. He leaned near enough that only she would hear his words. “I think we might have been observed last night. I might be wrong, but there was a man by himself at a table in the corner.”