Passing as Elias (7 page)

“Like what things?” she asked after another minute’s silence.

The Captain paused with the teacup to his lips, and lowered it again slowly, “Well … I will admit that I have thought about moments like these for a long while.”

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows, “About us?”

“Indeed.” He gave an embarrassed smile, “I was smitten as soon as I met you.”

“Do you think we are compatible, Captain?” Elizabeth said quickly.

“I should hope so,” he said, taking another sip of tea and setting the cup and saucer down upon the side table.

“What is it that makes two people compatible?” Elizabeth asked.

Captain Greenwood took a deep breath, “Well, I suppose one must have values similar to that of their partner. I believe, … forgive me, sexual attraction plays a rather large role.”

“Lust?” Elizabeth asked.

“Mmh.” The Captain nodded, “There must be some level of attraction in order for things to work. Apart from that, mutual trust and understanding.”

“Many marriages fail, Captain. Do you think people can become incompatible over time?”

“Mayhap.” He gave a shrug, and Elizabeth found herself leaning rather close to him.

“How can you tell when you have found the one?”

The Captain laughed, “I suppose no one knows. Do you not believe in love, Miss Searson? Your questions intrigue me. It is as though you do not believe in soul mates.”

“I cannot believe in something I have never experienced,” she said plainly.

Captain Greenwood had no response to this, though Elizabeth had had a sudden idea.

“Shall I make you an offer Captain?”

“What do you mean?” he asked warily.

“I do not know what love, or lust feels like,” Elizabeth admitted, licking her lips nervously. If she could seduce the Captain, he might propose within the month. “I propose a test.”

“A test?” The Captain frowned, “Miss Searson, please … you are talking of courtship as though it is some experiment you are concocting in your laboratory.  These things take time. You are thinking too logically regarding matters of the heart.”

“You do not wish to hear of the test?” Elizabeth put a hand to the Captain’s knee gently, with an innocent smile.

“Amuse me,” Captain Greenwood sighed, with a small smile on his face. “Please tell me how you plan to conduct an experiment regarding matters of our compatibility. As far as I was aware, courting was the act of a couple getting to know one another in order to decide whether an engagement should follow. Would courtship not be a sufficient experiment?”

“I find that path rather lengthy.” Elizabeth smiled, “Kiss me, Captain. We shall see instantly whether this arrangement shall work or not.” She did not know what had come over her. Was this how you seduced a man? She was not sure.

Captain Greenwood gaped at her, “I cannot.” He shook his head and stood.

Elizabeth tried a different tack, “Do you not want to?” she asked, crestfallen.

Captain Greenwood sighed, “Of course.”

“Do you not think it would simplify matters? Or do you not find me attractive?”

“I would love nothing more than to kiss you, Miss Searson,” he admitted. Elizabeth felt her stomach tighten.

Elizabeth was quite embarrassed at her boldness, however, she had decided to take a logical approach to the issue at hand. If she enjoyed kissing Captain Greenwood, she would, of course, tell him that it had been pleasant. Perhaps then she would be able to marry him. If it repulsed her, on the other hand, she would make it known. She would not pretend to love him for personal gain of Professor de Bard’s properties.

“This was not how I imagined our first kiss,” Captain Greenwood admitted.

“Have you imagined it before now?” Elizabeth wondered aloud.

“Many times.” He smiled slyly.

“Tell me.”

“Oh, I do not think that is such a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“It … it is not something you tell a lady.” His brow furrowed.

“Are you embarrassed?”

“You ask extremely awkward questions, Miss Searson.” They looked at each other for a long while.

“Will you kiss me, Captain?” Elizabeth asked.

George Greenwood’s eyes blazed with determination and concentration. It was extremely clear to Elizabeth that he did not want to make a single mistake in this most important of situations. As the Captain put one hand in her hair, and the other to her waist, Elizabeth wondered vaguely if she was thinking too logically about the process of courting. As if it were an automatic reaction, her eyes closed as he leaned towards her, his lips slightly parted as he pressed them to hers. He was warm, and moist. His breath washed over her as he pulled away by a fraction, only to bring his mouth crashing down upon hers once again. Elizabeth put her fingertips to his cheek, and allowed him to kiss her fully and unashamedly. His tongue swirled through her mouth, hot and wet. As quickly as it had begun, it was over.

Captain Greenwood seemed to be having some kind of internal struggle. His hands were shaking with what appeared to be immense effort and self-restraint. 

“Please tell me you felt something,” he said.

Elizabeth straightened herself and considered this for a moment. She was not repulsed, nor was she aroused. However, she had found it quite nice.

“It was … pleasant.” She said, straightening her dress.

“I should not have done it.”

“Did you not enjoy it?” she asked, feigning an expression of deepest hurt.

Captain Greenwood stared at her, “Of course I enjoyed it! You do not know how long I have waited to do that.”

“So what is the problem, Captain?” Elizabeth stood.

“I had hoped to be a gentleman, and show restraint to some extent.”

“You stopped, did you not?” she asked with raised eyebrows.

Elizabeth was not sure if she was ashamed of herself for wanting Captain Greenwood to propose so he could sign the deed to Professor de Bard’s properties. She did like him, of course, though when he had kissed her she had not felt anything remotely like the feelings often described in books. There was no arousing passion, no butterflies in her stomach, and no pounding of her heart. She had not lied when she had said that it was pleasant though. She found it very enjoyable and wondered if the literature she had read about love had simply exaggerated the sensations felt during kissing. However, Elizabeth was not opposed to trying it again some time. Marriage might have little to do with the emotional entanglement of two young people, for emotions were fickle and not to be trusted. Romantic love was not necessary in most people’s eyes. After their brief intimacy Captain Greenwood bade Elizabeth farewell, and she watched him walk down the street, a slight spring in his step.

~

As Elizabeth had no job to go to she made herself useful around the house, and helped her mother by running errands. The work of a homemaker did not thrill Elizabeth, but she was a hard worker and was always seeking things to do.

Elizabeth’s mother was absolutely delighted that she had taken to Captain Greenwood’s courtship. Mary Searson would tell anyone who would listen that George Greenwood of the Royal Navy was courting her daughter, and so it seemed, was Captain Greenwood. One evening whilst visiting Elizabeth in her home, he told her how he could not help but boast about their courtship to his colleagues.

Two weeks after Professor de Bard’s funeral, Elizabeth’s mother suggested something that took her by surprise.

“I was thinking about asking Captain Greenwood his opinion on bundling.”

“I beg your pardon, Mother?” Elizabeth had said, thunderstruck.

Bundling was a term used to describe the act of bed courting, something that took place more commonly among the middle-class, and poorer families. Bundling couples were expected to talk to one another through the night with a plank of foot-high wood placed between them, to ensure that no sexual conduct would take place. The couple would remain mostly clothed, though Elizabeth was not sure suggesting bundling to Captain Greenwood was a very wise idea, for Elizabeth knew that he was no stranger to the company of a woman.

“Your father and I shared a bed once a fortnight when we were courting,” her mother recalled, a glazed look forming over her eyes as she reminisced.

“Yes, and I am sure all you did was
talk,
” Elizabeth said sarcastically.

Her mother looked sternly at Elizabeth, “We were very good. Although … your father did sneak into my bedroom on many occasions. But all we did was
cuddle,
” she insisted, “Bundling is a courtship
ritual
, many courting couples do it. Besides, I know you would not do anything to be ashamed of.”

Elizabeth considered this for a moment, “For how long were you and Father courting, before he proposed?” she asked.

“We courted for a month before your father sent a letter to my parents, expressing his desire to marry me.” Her mother sighed, a far-away look in her eyes.

“Did you marry right away?” Elizabeth wondered.

“Aye, we were wed within a fortnight of his proposal.”

“Did … did you love him?”

Mary Searson focused her eyes upon Elizabeth, who tried to fashion her expression into one of polite curiosity.

“Very much,” her mother replied, “from the very first day.”

Elizabeth nodded in understanding and did not ask any more questions.

“You seem troubled,” her mother noted.

Elizabeth sat in silence for a long while, “I am fine … really,” she assured her.

As it turned out, Elizabeth’s mother did not need to concern herself with badgering Captain Greenwood with regards to his opinions of bundling up with Elizabeth. On Saturday night as the tower clock chimed ten, Elizabeth was putting on her nightdress, and washing her face in the basin. Her mother had retired an hour previously, and Elizabeth could hear light snores issuing from her room adjacent. Walking over to her bed, and putting out the candle, Elizabeth drew back the covers and slipped between the sheets. It was a cold night, and she curled up into the foetal position. Barely a minute had passed since putting out her light when there came a strange tap at her window. Elizabeth raised her head slightly from the pillow and listened hard for the sound again.

Tap.

Sliding out of bed, Elizabeth made her way to her bedroom window, and pulled the lace curtains aside. The moon was lighting up the street, and standing below her second storey window was George Greenwood.

His face lit up when he saw her standing there, and he dropped the handful of pebbles he had been intending to throw at the glass.

Elizabeth opened the window noiselessly and leaned out, her hair falling past her shoulders in curtains around her face, “Captain, what are you doing here?” she hissed down at him, unable to suppress a small smile playing across her lips.

“I had to see you,” he said in a hushed voice that carried clearly up to her.

“You saw me only yesterday,” she pointed out. They had seen each other several times over the last two weeks, however, they had not shared any more intimate moments since that kiss that had taken place after the funeral.

She saw him grin as he removed his hat, and held it to his chest. “I could not stay away,” he confessed. “I have thought of nothing else all day, except coming to visit you. I could not stop myself.”

Elizabeth smiled, and her mother’s voice echoed in her head
; I was thinking about asking Captain Greenwood his opinion on bundling. We courted for a month before your father sent a letter to my parents, expressing his desire to marry me.
Could she really have the Professor’s apothecary in a little over a month?

“Captain,” Elizabeth whispered, “would you dare climb the wall and enter through my window?”

Captain Greenwood seemed momentarily shocked, before composing himself, “I would dare,” he admitted with a nod. “But only if I was invited.”

Elizabeth tried to steady her breathing, “You are invited, sir.” And without another word she stepped away from the window and back to her bed, where she sat, waiting.

It did not take long for Captain Greenwood to scale the side of the house. The brickwork was clumsy, and there were many holes, allowing for an easy climb. He was rather silent as he climbed through the open window. His shoulders were a little too wide, but he managed to slip inside noiselessly.

Straightening up, he gazed around the moonlit room, before his eyes fell on Elizabeth in her nightdress, sitting on the bed. She realised she had never been so bare in front of a man before, and twisted her hands together nervously as he looked at her.

“I have never seen you in this light before,” he whispered, stepping towards her.

Elizabeth avoided his penetrating gaze and stared at her bare feet upon the floorboards.

“You seem nervous.” His voice was warm, and husky.

Elizabeth looked up at the Captain and saw that his expression was hard and blazing.

“I have never had a man in my bedroom before,” she admitted.

Captain Greenwood sat next to Elizabeth, causing the mattress to sink several inches, “I had to see you.” He heaved a dramatic sigh, “I was going mad, sitting at home and thinking of nothing else. Before I knew it I was halfway down the street. I shall be sad when I have to leave.” He leant backwards and rested on his palms.