Phantom Eyes (Witch Eyes) (6 page)

“Lucien matched us, and I allowed it, but I
did
love her,” he clarified. For one moment, and one moment only, he looked at me and there was a fierceness in his expression. “I should tell you that Jonathan did, as well. It was hard not to.”

“What was her name?”

“Rose. Rosemarie. She never let anyone outside of the family call her Rose.” Jason chuckled at that, looking away again. “Her family was like ours, although they used their gifts so differently. Not for war, like ours. Your mother didn’t have much in the way of power, but she had fire in so many other ways. Even on your worst day, she had a way of making you smile.” He seemed lost in his thoughts for a moment, fingers reaching absently towards his lips. A muscle in his cheek flexed, and he very nearly smiled before it fell away like the memory that had sparked it. “She had siblings, and they are not … inconsequential. You have an aunt and an uncle.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because they can protect you, Braden.” Jason shook his head, and then added, “If you want. You’ll never have to spend another day worrying about Catherine, or Lucien, or … anything else that weighs on you.” He didn’t say John’s name, but he might as well have. Or maybe he was talking about Trey.

“So you’re going to send me away,” I said. My legs were screaming in pain, and I looked down to see my fingernails clawing into my own skin. “Just throw me away because I’m useless now.” I didn’t bring up that I’d been thinking of leaving all on my own because this was different. Jason was trying to get rid of me.

“I’m going to save your life,” Jason responded gently. “Or at least I would like to. If you’ll let me.”

I looked up in shock, meeting his eyes. “What do you mean?”

“You’re old enough to make your own decision. You’re right in that much, at least. But I … would like you to meet them, at least. I mean it when I say that they can protect you. They stay under the radar, in more ways than one. Unless I’m mistaken, they’re the ones who taught my brother how to disappear.
”

“But you knew where to find him,” I pointed out. Jason had once showed me a spell that allowed him to spy on John and me back at our home in Montana.
To have to watch someone else raise your kid through what was basically a television. Getting no input at all. No wonder Jason was so cold.

“I didn’t say he tried to disappear from
me
,” Jason said. “If he hadn’t been my brother, things might have been different. If I had known … ” But I could only imagine what Jason was thinking. Maybe if he’d known the bargain struck between Lucien and Uncle John, if he’d known what John was really trying to avoid.

The mysterious phone calls that John had always gotten, I didn’t remember them happening when I was younger. Maybe they hadn’t. Maybe Lucien had waited until I was old enough and then he started drawing Jo
hn back in. And John hadn’t run, because how far could you run from something that could predict your every move?

“You can always find family, Braden. It’s more than just the blood you share. It’s a connection. Deeper than anything else, a well that you share between you.”

My mom had a family. A brother and a sister. I’d always wanted a brother or something when I was younger, even though I knew it would never happen. Siblings were for kids that had two parents. I only had John. Besides, I wouldn’t want to be the oldest—I wanted older siblings to follow around and learn from. Growing up seemed like it would have been easier if I was the baby. Maybe I wouldn’t have ended up here at all because I would have had someone else looking out just for me.

“I—I’ll think about it,” I said, pulling my hands away from my skin.

Jason nodded, eyes widening a fraction. It was nice to know I could still surprise him.
You didn’t expect me to agree, did you?
And if I was willing to admit it, it was nice that I cared enough to notice.

“I’ll make some calls. They won’t come into the city itself, not with our … issues. They’re aware of Lucien’s limits. As long as they don’t cross the town line, he can’t touch them.”

Lucien was bound to the city, trapped through a complex spell that Grace had created that used the lines of the town as a binding to keep him here. “But he can still leave. He had to, he came to Montana and put the vision in my head that brought me here.”

Jason nodded. “But had a connection to my brother, acting like a beacon. Even still, he was likely at an incredible disadvantage. In order to even send a projection, he would have had to leave the bulk of what power he had behind. And no one likes to be helpless.” His face blanched as the implication of what he’d just said occurred to him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

“It’s fine.” After that, neither one of us had anything to say, and we sat there, the only sound the ticking of the grandfather clock in the corner. I looked up several times, thinking Jason was looking at me, only to see his eyes vacant and relaxed. Whatever he was seeing made him look … relaxed. And sad.

“What happened the night she died?” I asked, my voice reverently quiet. Ben had brought my mother up the night he’d stolen my blood. I hadn’t forgotten, but there’d never seemed like a good time to ask.

As easily as Jason had opened up moments ago, the gates slammed closed and his posture stiffened. His silence stopped being a thing of feelings and regret, and returned to the constipated, prissy quiet that I’d come to know and loathe.

“I’ll let you know when your aunt and uncle are ready to meet,” Jason said, his voice almost robotic in its monotony. As if only a minute ago we hadn’t been discussing my mother, and Jason had smiled.

Nothing’s ever going to change. Maybe he’s right, and I should just run while I’ve got the chance.

It was a surprise how much that thought hurt.

ten

Trey wasn’t lingering by the door ready to pounce the moment I left Jason’s study. Drew wasn’t lurking around the back waiting to seethe in my general direction, either. It was a little disconcerting. I expected one or both of them to vent about Jason at me, so the unexpected silence was … uncomfortable. It threw my day off a little—I’d hoped getting Drew to kick my ass a bit would soothe the itching in my legs and maybe clear my head a little bit.

What did it say about me that my entire sense of normalcy rested on Trey intruding on me and Drew being a dick?

I wanted to go for a run, but without Drew there, I didn’t feel comfortable going out back into the woods. But there was nothing to stop me from using the treadmill that Jason had in his exercise room. It was more like a suite, full of top-of-the-line equipment that didn’t have a speck of dust on it, but still didn’t look like it had ever been used.

I stopped by my room to pick up a pair of shoes and change into running shorts, and then I headed back, intending on only going for a mile or two. Just enough to take off the edge to this nervous energy. But once I hopped on, and my stride started to lengthen, I found myself falling into a rhythm. It was like the moment I really hit my stride my mind cleared out of all the stress and the tangled thoughts, leaving me with clear canvas.

I had family other than Jason. He’d gone in search of them.
That
was why John had come back to the house that last day. He’d told Jason exactly where to find them. But the knowledge still chafed against the memory of my uncle. John had known all along that they existed, and he’d never even said a word. Never told me there was somewhere else I might be safe, if not for him. Maybe things would have been different.

But I could leave. If not with them, then with Jade. I had options.

Leaving meant that they would all get away with it. Lucien for destroying so many lives. Catherine for what she did to my uncle. Grace, for what she’d done to me. Walking away meant giving up on any of that. Was that cowardly? Or was it a strategic retreat?
I wish you were still here, Uncle John,
I thought.
Because I don’t know what to do.
I zoned out for a bit, staring out the window at the forest behind the house.

It had seemed
like only a few minutes since I’d jumped on the treadmill, but by the time I looked down at the screen, I was supposedly crossing my seventh mile. I looked around, realizing the light in the room was differe
nt. Brighter, since we were on the western side of the house and it was getting to be midafternoon.

There was definitely something wrong with me. I’d never been weak and housebound, but I’d never had the kind of energy I had lately. Last time things had started to get strange, I’d ignored it and it had turned I had a part of Lucien’s … I don’t even know what the winter voice was, but it had been in my head, manipulating me.

But who was I supposed to ask? Jason? He was already half tempted to lock me up where no one would ever find me again. There wasn’t anyone else I thought could help that I would even remotely consider going to.

When I got back to my room (after pushing through and finishing the eighth mile), my phone was blinking.

Catherine knows we want to leave. Lucien told her,
Jade had texted almost an hour ago.

How????
I sent back.

A new pair of sunglasses says it involved entrails.

It was stupid of me to even be surprised. Lucien had the ability to see the future as a series of threaded timelines that split off from each other at the slightest deviation. I’d tapped into his power before and been almost immediately overwhelmed. At any given moment, there are thousands upon thousands of possibilities in play. Our conversation last night must have triggered something, set a particular future into motion or something.

That was the main problem in wanting to work against Lucien. The only way to really get the best of him was to be truly random. I hadn’t planned to shoot him in the head, which was the only reason it must have worked.

She said if I try to leave, she’ll just beat me there and bring me back,
Jade texted.
What are we going to do?

Figure out something else,
I sent back, then tossed my phone onto the bed where it vanished into the messy pile of blankets. But the idea of trying to do anything at all was almost paralyzing. The moment I started, Lucien would know everything I was up to. He’d know exactly where to strike to cut me off at the knees. He’d see through any feint, any attempt at subterfuge.

If I kept stressing about everything, and didn’t actually
do
something, I was going to go insane. What I needed was a change of perspective. A reminder of just what kind of monster I was up against.

The hospital was almost my second home by this point. If I wasn’t a patient myself, I was visiting one. I’d never liked hospitals—it was more than just an ordinary thing, though, like hating the way all hospitals used the same neutral color scheme. Or the way all hospitals seemed to smell identical—like disinfectant, tension, and emptiness.

Mostly, it was because hospitals were chock-full of emotions. All of those feelings, memories, and especially all that pain would build up over the years. Seeing the hospital without my sunglasses on was always a thousand times worse than whatever had landed me into the hospital in the first place.

Riley’s room was almost unrecognizable when I walked in. She was up on one of the top floors, in a private room where she could be monitored better. Her mother couldn’t afford it, but Jason could. There was even a guard at the door, just in case anyone got too interested in her. He’d already had it all taken care of before I’d even thought to ask. Even then, he tried to play dumb when I brought it up later to thank him. For whatever reason, Jason didn’t want any of the credit for making sure Riley was taken care of.

The room normally had an exceptional view of the city through the forest. But ever since her second night, when Riley had had some sort of epic freak-out, the drapes stayed drawn. Every wall socket had at least one night light—most had two, and the overhead lights in the room were never shut off. Even while she slept. Her bed was covered in quilts that smelled faintly of smoke and sadness, worn along the edges and colors a pale imitation of what they’d once been. Fitting for the girl who was a faded impression of who
she’d
once been.

There were pictures taped to the far wall, a collection of them artfully displayed to highlight all the people that Riley had known on a daily basis. I didn’t have any proof, but I had a feeling that was Jade’s contribution. She and Riley didn’t get along, at least that was how it looked on the surface, but I never got the impression that Jade actually hated her. Riley might have seriously disliked her, but Jade was more resigned on the matter. Like there was nothing she could do about the problem, and no easy way to fix it.

There were even copies of the school newspaper were spread out along the bedside table in case Riley ever woke up and wanted to do some light reading. But Riley wouldn’t, because her mind had been shattered. By me. Now she was somewhe
re between schizophrenic and a vegetable, speaking in riddles that sounded like nonsense.

My vision wavered as I crossed the room’s threshold, and the bottom dropped out of my stomach. Suddenly I felt every last one of those miles I’d run, and my legs were like soup. I fumbled towards the wall, holding myself upright through sheer force of will.

What better place to fall apart than the middle of the hospital?
But I didn’t want to through another round of “let’s try and diagnose Braden’s freaky problems.” Nothing certain ever came of them. Medicine couldn’t help me control the witch eyes, and it almost certainly wasn’t going to solve whatever was wrong with me now.

“I know you’re there,” I said, once I realized just how quiet the room was. Too quiet.

Matthias rose from his seat in the corner, where he’d been hidden by one of the big gift baskets that kept accumulating. Likely by someone who thought Jason would be stopping in to check on her personally.

“Hush now, indoor voices,” Matthias murmured, giving me a smile. “We wouldn’t want the little miss to wake early from her slumber, would we?”

I forced myself to stand up straight, ignoring the shiver in my limbs. I’d already showed him enough weakness lately. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m not the one with interesting agendas. And seeing as how some small part of that life you’ve got draped around your shoulders belongs to me, I don’t think I care to answer. You came to see the girl. Why? What do you think you can do for her?”

“You can’t be here,” I insisted. “Don’t come here again. Riley’s suffered enough.” I would have to involve Jason, tell him that the demons were starting to circle. That would only make him more interested in Riley, but better him than a closet full of monsters.

“Hasn’t she just,” Matthias said with a small chuckle. “But I’m afraid I can’t abide by your wishes. After all, someone needs to be looking out for the girl’s best interests. Ask yourself if you can protect her?” He waited a moment during which I was uncomfortably silent. “I thought not.”

My eyes moved, involuntary. Since coming into the room, I’d tried not to look. Tried not to see.

Riley lay in her bed, feet and legs pulled up tight against her body. She wasn’t rocking today, so that was an improvement. Wasn’t spitting out a stream of crazy conscious thoughts that resemb
led word salad. Wasn’t screaming, or clawing, or scaring the living crap out of hardened women who thought they’d seen everything.

I hadn’t been here for it, but I heard one of the nurses had never come back to work after dealing with Riley. Riley had grabbed her by the wrist, and started reciting dates. Times, months, years. They didn’t mean anything to the other nurse on duty, but they meant something to the one Riley had grabbed. She’d bolted out of the room shortly after the dates switched from past to future, to things that hadn’t happened yet. Tragedies and triumphs that no one had any right to know yet. Least of all a broken girl tucked away in a town full of darkness.

Riley was another casualty of going up against Lucien. He tried using her as his final sacrifice, wanting to kill her to hurt
me.
I’d killed him once before, only to find out that a creature like Lucien can’t just be
killed.
But I had broken him, cracked the foundation of whatever existence he currently had. The sacrifices were all part of a restoration ritual, but I’d interfered and kept him from taking Riley. Back when I had power. Back when that power had been just as deadly as Lucien.

“Oh good, you’re feeling sorry for yourself,” Matthias grimaced, turning away like the look on my face was somehow offensive. “I thought that would have passed by now.”

“It’s been
three days,
” I snapped.

“Worlds and empires have fallen in less.”

“Easy to say when you’ve still got your creepy demon powers,” I muttered.

“Forgotten hells, aren’t you bored with being the victim by now? Do something new!” Matthias asked, an unusual sharpness cutting at his words. “Be the villain. Be
interesting.
You can’t say Belle
Dam hasn’t earned it.”

“I don’t know how I feel about taking a civics lesson from a demon,” I said stiffly.

“
Someone
needs to remind you of your place. Have you forgotten our friend in the lighthouse?”

“And look where that got me! What do you think I’m going to do, Matthias?
Sarcasm
Lucien to death? He’s right. I’m nothing now.”

“You’re everything you were a week ago,” Matthias said. “Maybe more.”

“You’re insane.”

“You’ve been manipulated since the moment Lucien set his good eye on you,” Matthias replied, his eyes narrow. “There hasn’t been a single decision that you’ve made that someone else hasn’t prompted you into. You don’t act. You react. Try pulling your own strings for once. Better yet, pull someone else’s.”

“With
what?”
I tore off the sunglasses that were just for show. Stared at him with eyes that had once held a curse, but were now a flat, unnatural green.

Matthias took in a slow breath, clearly taking his time and drawing this all out. “In all of this, you never thought to ask the most important of questions. It never occurred to you to wonder.”

I hugged myself, staring down at the floor. “Wonder what?”

“You’ve pitted yourself against a creature of the primordial. They called him the Fateblinder once. Did you know that?” Matthias sighed. “Nearly a demon’s lifetime ago. Regardless, you dance where he tells you because he holds the cards. If there is a string to pull, his fingers will tangle on it at the worst possible moment. So tell me how your friend the Rider doesn’t know who’s hiding in the lighthouse?”

Jade and I had talked about leaving, and suddenly Catherine knew. Even when Lucien was hunting for his sacrifices, using Matthias to find them, he’d sent me out looking in all the wrong places. Lucien always
knew.
“She exists in another world,” I said, because that was the answer, wasn’t it? Grace wasn’t under his purview?