Playing With Fire (Guarded Hearts) (6 page)

He wanted me to cook? With him? At his house for Thanksgiving dinner? I guessed it would be a nice way to say thank you to his dad. "Sure, that sounds fun."

His smile was huge, as he went and got his cell phone. "Hey, dad…we're leaving in about an hour, but we're going to stop at the grocery store first…Maddy and I are going to make dinner tomorrow...okay, great." He hung up the phone and smiled at me. "I think he fell in love with you already."

After breakfast, we cleaned up and then got in the car. I brought a notebook and a pen with me so I could use his phone to look up recipes and make a shopping list. The drive to Carter's house was about three hours. Halfway through the ride, I had the menu all figured out. I was surprisingly excited for all this. He reached over and grabbed my hand. I looked over at him.

"Thank you for coming home with me, and for agreeing to cook dinner. I don't think we've cooked for a holiday since my mom died." I squeezed his hand. He didn't know that I was just as happy about this as he was.

We went to the grocery store and got everything we needed. Carter seemed to always find a way to touch me, and I kind of loved it. We pulled up to his house and my nerves started to kick in. Here goes nothing.

Carter

I wasn't nervous for Maddy to meet my family. As soon as we parked, Anthony came out of the house. He looked over at Maddy and then looked back at me.

"Who's the hottie?"

Maddy and I started to laugh. "Ant, this is Maddy, a friend of mine from school. Maddy, this is my brother, Anthony." She smiled at him. Anthony was a little shorter than me, but he played football for the high school so all the girls loved him. He had a buzz cut and blue eyes like me so he was used to getting attention, but he wasn't going to get it from Maddy.

"Why is she just your friend? Do you not have eyes?"

I laughed again. I was pretty sure when Anthony was made, they forgot to put in the filter that the rest of us had. "Is Holly home?"

He looked at me and laughed. "Who the hell knows where that girl is?"

"Come on. Why don't you help me get the groceries
inside?"

We all went in and my dad was sitting in the living room reading the paper. He stood up when he saw me and gave me a hug. I really missed being home with my family. My dad was about my height, with light brown hair that he refused to accept was going gray. I pulled away and grabbed Maddy's hand, pulling her next to me. "Dad, this is Madison Stevens. Maddy, this is my father, Michael James.
”

She gave my dad one of those smiles, and he was a goner. "It's so nice to meet you, Mr. James. Thank you so much for inviting me this weekend. It really means a lot."

My dad was a hugger so he wrapped his arms around her. When he let go, he looked at me and gave me a look that said he knew I wanted to be more than just friends. "It's very nice to meet you, too. Don't think twice about making yourself at home here." He sat down and went back to reading his paper.

We got everything put away but, unfortunately, my house only had four bedrooms;
one for my dad, and one for each of us kids. Dad didn't believe me on the phone when I said Maddy and I were just friends, so he planned for us to stay in the same room.

Most parents would never allow that, but my dad was realistic and knew if we had wanted to do anything, separate rooms wouldn't have made a difference. I could tell she was uncomfortable. I walked her to my room and shut the door. "I'm sorry about this whole room thing, I'm gonna sleep on the couch." Maybe it was just my imagination or wishful thinking, but I thought she looked disappointed.

"Um…okay."

We spent the rest of the night prepping things for tomorrow. My dad was watching the news so I asked Maddy if she wanted to go watch a movie with me. She thanked my dad again for inviting her and walked off to my bedroom. I was about to follow her, but my dad called me. "Carter, wait a minute; come here."

Maddy looked back at me as if asking what she should do. "I'll be there in a minute, okay?" She nodded her head and went into my room. "What's up, Dad?"

He leaned forward and shut off the TV. This was serious. "What's going on with you and her?"

Well, isn't that the million dollar question.
I decided to be completely honest with him. I really needed some advice. "I don't know, Dad. I think I'm falling in love with her." There, I said it.

"You think? Son, you've already fallen and so has she. So what's the problem?"

He thought Maddy was in love with me? "No, Dad, you're wrong about her
.
She has a boyfriend."

"I see the way she looks at you and that girl is hung up on you, boyfriend or not. Can I ask why she isn't with him and his family? Not that I'm complaining because she's a great girl."

"He didn't want her there. God, I hate him so much and I think he is hurting her. I don't have any proof, but I know something is wrong."

My dad looked at me for a second, then shook his head. "Well, what are you gonna do about it? Your mother always said,
‘the choices we make and the chances we take determine our destiny.'
What do you want your destiny to be, Carter?"

I already knew the answer to this. I'd been thinking about it all day. "I want to tell her how much I love her. I want to be with her, make her laugh, be able to be the one to hold her when she is upset. I want to show her how amazing she is and be the first person in her life to treat her like that. Every time she comes in a room, I can't take my eyes off of her. When she touches me, sometimes I need to remember how to breathe."

He smiled at me. "Well, you have four days with her to show her how it could be. I'd take advantage of that if I were you."

He was right. I needed to show her how it felt to be loved. I knew she hadn't had that since her mom. "Thanks, Dad. You really helped." He sat back in his chair and turned the TV back on.

Tomorrow was going to be day one to make Maddy mine.

Chapter Four

Madison

I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and heard Carter talking to his dad. I knew it was wrong to eavesdrop, but I had to know what he was saying. He loved me? He wanted to be with me? He said more nice things about me in those couple minutes than anyone had my whole life. If I was being honest with myself, I'd fallen for Carter too.

Just then, he walked into the room and I couldn't contain my smile. "So, what do you want to watch? I looked through the channels, but there wasn't much on."

He smiled at me and went to get something from his bag. "When you went to get the turkey, I snuck a little surprise in the cart." He turned around holding the DVD of "
The Notebook."
He bought this for me so we could watch it together?

There went another little piece of my heart to him. I barely had any of it left. He'd taking it piece by piece ever since we met. I just prayed that, one day, he wouldn't tell me he didn't want it anymore. "If you don't want to watch it
,
that's fine."

Shit, I hadn't said anything. "No
,
Carter, that was so sweet of you to get that for me. I've wanted to see it."

He smirked at me. "Okay, great, on one condition." Uh-oh. "You don't think any less of me if I cry again. I heard this is worse than the other one."

I couldn't stop myself from laughing. He was perfect. "I promise."

Carter put the movie in and then came over to the bed. He stood there, unsure for a minute, then grabbed a backrest and lay down against it. I was sitting Indian style on the bed, but about ten minutes into the movie, I couldn't help myself. I scooted over to where Carter was, lay down next to him and put my head on his chest.

I felt him release a breath I didn't know he was holding.
Should I not have done this? What if he doesn't want me on him?
Just then, he put his arms around me and gave me a squeeze. This was where I wanted to be.

I cried at the movie and as much as Carter would deny it, I felt him reach up to brush a tear away. He grabbed the remote, shut off the TV, and we just lay there together. He began stroking my hair and I let out a sigh of contentment.

"If I lie here any longer, I'm going to fall asleep. I'm going to go out on the couch now." I could hear the reluctance in his voice.

"Carter, you shouldn't have to sleep on the couch."

"Maddy, I'm not going to have you sleeping on the couch. One, I wouldn't be able to fall asleep. Two, my father would probably kick my ass."

I couldn't believe I was about to suggest this. "Maybe you could stay in here." I felt his whole body tense up. I read this situation completely wrong. He didn't want me this close to him. I was crowding him, just like I did with Chris. Shit. I was going to cry. I got up from the bed. I needed to go to the bathroom. I didn't want to cry in front of him.

Carter beat me to the door. "Maddy? Hey, look at me." I just shook my head. I had enough embarrassment for the night. He lowered himself so he could see my face. "Hey, what's wrong? Please talk to me."

I hated how weak I was, and I hated how much I felt like I needed him right now. "I'm sorry, Carter. I guess I made an assumption I shouldn't have. It's okay. I understand that I'm a lot to handle. Chris told me before that I crowd him too
.
I'll give you your space." I felt him tense again.

He started pulling me toward the bed. What was he doing? At this point, I was too tired to care. He lay back down and pulled me with him. The way that he did it, I ended up straddling him. He took my face between his hands. "Listen to me, Maddy. You are
not
crowding me. I love being around you and if you let me, I'd never leave your side. I hate that you are so negative about yourself. Also, that asshole doesn't know what he's talking about. You deserve so much better than him, baby. And I just-"

I crashed my lips into his and he let out a low moan that was by far the sexiest sound I'd ever heard. He dropped his hands to his sides. He was probably afraid to touch me after last time. "Carter, put your arms around me. Please, I need you."

He wrapped me in an embrace so tight, and I'd never felt so wanted. When he kissed me, it was almost like I could feel his love pouring into my veins. I felt him getting hard underneath me and I pulled away.

I wasn't ready for this.

I felt like the walls were closing in on me and I was struggling to catch my breath. I felt like I was spinning in circles. I couldn't believe I was having an anxiety attack right now. When Carter realized what was going on, he laid me down on my side next to him, turned to face me, and I buried my head in his chest.

It took me a few minutes, but I finally calmed down. I pulled my head back and looked up at him. He looked so worried that I was finally starting to understand that he really did care about me.

"Maddy, please talk to me. I'm not mad at you, I promise. I really need you to tell me what's going on, though."

"I don't think I can."

"If this is about Chris, I can handle it. Just, please, don't shut me out. I'm here for you. All you need to do is let me in."

"It isn't about him." This time my problems had nothing to do with Chris. I couldn't believe I was about to tell him this. "The first foster home I went to, my foster father abused me. He used to come into my room at night and make me touch him when he was hard. He used to tell me that once I got a little bit older, he couldn't wait to play with me. It started to get more frequent and I started to get really scared. I told my teacher at school, and they called the state. He denied it, but they relocated me immediately. I'm sorry that I freaked out on you." He didn't say anything. I probably disgusted him now. "I understand if you don't want anything to do with me anymore. I know I'm damaged goods."

"Where do you get this stuff? You know what? Don't answer that. I already know." He grabbed my chin and made me look at him. "Chris is a sad excuse for a man. None of that was your fault. You were a victim. If you want me to stay with you tonight, nothing would make me happier."

"I do."

"Thank God, because I really didn't want to sleep on the couch while you were in here. I wanted to be in here with you." He kissed the top of my head. "What time should I set my alarm for tomorrow?"

"Um…I need to put the turkey in the oven at six, but then I figured I'd go back to sleep for a couple of hours."

"Okay, it's set. Goodnight, Maddy."

"Good night, Carter."

I love you.

Carter

I opened my eyes and looked at the clock. Jesus, it was three in the morning. What the hell was I doing up?

"No, stop, please!"

Shit, Maddy was having a nightmare. Somehow, she ended up on the other side of the bed. I pulled her over to me and rubbed her arm. "Hey, Maddy, wake up."

"No, please, don't hurt him!" Who the hell was she talking about? "Chris, please, just leave him alone!"