Revenge of the Girl With the Great Personality (12 page)

As if.

“I don’t know.” He shrugs his shoulders, his magnificent broad shoulders…. “You seem a little different.”

“So is that a good or a bad thing?” I can’t believe I’m being so blunt with him. Never did I think I’d have the confidence to pretty much ask Logan if he thinks I’m hot. I mean, that’s basically what’s going on here, right?

“No, it’s all fine.” He looks straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact with me. “It seems to have come out of nowhere. Like, I wasn’t aware that you had a thing for Taylor, that’s all.”

Hmmm, jealous much?

I shrug. “I wasn’t aware that I needed to give you my diary to read.”

He laughs. “I don’t mean it like that. It’s only … I didn’t realize that you had so many surprises up your sleeve.” He finally meets my eyes. And instead of doing what I usually do, which is melt into a pile of boy-crazy blubber, I decide to do something that I’ve never done before.

I’m going to flirt with Logan Reeves.

I give him a mischievous smirk and raise my left eyebrow. “Oh, Logan, you have no idea of all the surprises I have.”

And I can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, he’ll flirt right back.

“Yeah, well.” He crosses his arms and leans back in his chair. “Taylor’s a good guy, one of my best friends. We should go on a double date sometime.”

On second thought …

I nod in reply. I guess that could be fun. I’ve never been that great watching Logan and Alyssa go all couply in front of me, but if I was with Taylor … I make a mental note to call him later. Between his practices, my work, me being Mac’s personal chauffeur, and this pageant, we haven’t been able to have a third date. But we’ve been talking every day. He’s even sent me a few texts to see how I’m holding up with all the pageant craziness.

Logan and I sit in silence during the crowning. Mackenzie technically got first in her age group (although two girls in her division “pulled out,” which means they got a bigger overall title), so it’ll be a pleasant car ride home.

Logan gives me a little nod good-bye before he walks over to kiss Alyssa.

I’ll just remove that knife sticking through my heart, thank you very much
.

I go over to Mac and Mom, and to my horror see
Texas Beauty Tykes
Tom approach us. I shut my eyes and will him to go speak to someone else, to not mention the things I said to him.

I open my eyes and see him in front of Mom. “Excuse me, Ms. Anderson? I’m with the production team, and we’d love to have a word with you and your family.”

Mom’s eyes widen. “Of course. Come on, Mackenzie.”

Tom gestures toward me. “We’d like Lexi as well.”

“Oh!” Mom looks between the producer and me, although I refuse to make eye contact with either of them. Instead I’m pretending like I’m really interested in the banners on stage. “Of course.”

I feel Mom’s hand on my arm as we head into the room next door where they were doing the interviews. I won’t look at her, or acknowledge that I know exactly why Tom knows my name.

Tom gestures to the three chairs that are lined up for us. “Please have a seat.”

The three of us sit down in front of Tom and a few other people. Introductions are made. Mom and Mackenzie are smiling and being their perfect pageant selves. I feel like I’m about to be interrogated.

Tom smiles. “We have some great news.”
I guess that would depend on who you’re talking to.
“We’d like to talk about featuring your family in an upcoming episode.”

Mom puts her hand up to her heart. “Oh my goodness, this is just the best news
ever
. Isn’t it Mackenzie?”

Mackenzie gives them her pageant smile.

I try not to look like a deer caught in headlights.

This can’t be happening.

He continues, “We think you have a great family story, and we especially like the dynamic between the two sisters. We aren’t used to seeing such a big gap in the age of siblings, and well, to be honest, their opinions on pageants.”

Wow, these lightbulbs are bright. I wonder how many there are in this room? Maybe if I stare at them long enough I’ll go blind and have to leave to go to the hospital. Yes, an injury would be really great right now. Because a self-inflicted wound will be a lot better than the damage that’ll be done if Mom finds out that I talked to any of the
Tykes
people.

Oh, who am I kidding, I
went off
on him.

Mom says in her best sugary-sweet,
everything-is-perfect-in-my-family
voice, “Lexi loves helping her little sister, don’t you, Lex?”

Mom’s giving me one of those
don’t-you-dare-mess-this-up
looks.

I know exactly what these producers are looking for. And I’m going to make sure that they get the exact
opposite
of that.

I turn to them and put on a nice, big pageant smile. (I’m pretty sure I look insane.) “Oh yes, I think what the pageants have done for my darling baby sister is priceless. There’s such a sense of community within these young ladies. And they’re learning such important life skills that they’ll be able to carry with them throughout their lives.”

Even without turning, I can tell that both Mom and Mac are about to fall over from shock.

I keep smiling at the producers as they start whispering among themselves.

“I’m sorry, Lexi,” one of the other producers says to me, “we were under the impression that you hated pageants and thought they were a waste of money.”

I feign being stunned. “Goodness gracious, I don’t know what on earth would ever give you such an impression. My word!” I don’t know
why I suddenly find the need to talk as if I’m a character straight out of
Gone with the Wind
.

Tom’s face turns red. “How about your conversation with me?”

“When did you speak to him?” Mom’s pageant face has been erased and her
I’m-going-to-kill-you-Lexi
face has returned.

“When you were in here. Lexi was extremely vocal about her disgust for the pageant world.”

How odd that he didn’t choose to use the word
entrapment
to describe our encounter.

Although is this really considered news to Mom? I know I’ve made comments, but has she really ignored them all? Does my opinion really matter that little to her?

In order to stop a major scene, which is what they’re looking for, I stand up.

I feel my body tremble, but I force myself to look at each of the producers in the eye. I know I get annoyed about pageants and Princess Mackenzie, but at the end of the day, she’s my sister. I will protect her as best I can.

Nobody puts baby sis in a corner.

I take a deep breath. “I’m aware of what I said outside. Although, I
wasn’t
aware that I was speaking to a producer and that
is
my fault. But I do need to make something clear. If you come into our house, you’re only going to encounter Encouraging and Supportive Lexi, the
bestest
big sister in the whole wide world. I will not allow you to humiliate my family or take advantage of my baby sister, who, despite my feelings
about pageants, I love very much. So if you’re looking for some extreme fighting among siblings, you aren’t going to get it here.”

I walk out of the room. Even with my back turned, I can feel every eyeball on me, including a very angry pair.

I try to compose myself for a few minutes before Mom and Mac come back out. I know I’ve ruined this for Mackenzie. But I’ve seen that show, I’ve seen how most of the contestants look like brats and are humiliated after the episode airs. Yes,
I
called Mackenzie a brat, and at times she can be, but I don’t want her to be made fun of.

I remember being seven. I loved that age. Being seven’s awesome. You don’t have that much responsibility or homework. And it’s illegal to work, so you get to play a lot. Being seven rocks. Or it should rock.

Mom and Mac exit the room. Mom walks over to me and grabs my arm, hard.

“They don’t want us now. Are you happy? How could you do this to your sister?”

I refuse to back down. Enough is enough. “How could
you
do this to
your
daughter,
Mom
?”

She leads me over to a corner so we’re away from a large group of gossipy pageant moms, all waiting to make one last plea for their children to be featured on the show. “What are you even talking about? Do you have any idea what a big deal this would’ve been for your sister?”

“Big deal for what? Three of the girls here today have been featured on that show. All it does is shed light on money problems, family
tension … I’ve never seen one person come out of that show who made me think,
Well, they’re not
totally
made of pure evil
.”

“You’re just jealous of your sister. That’s obviously why you’ve been prancing around like a —” Mom closes her mouth quickly.

I get in her face. We’re only inches away from each other. “Like a what? Say it. Because I’m wearing half the makeup you put on your seven-year-old daughter to strut around on stage in a bikini in front of strangers. Yeah, so let’s start judging the sixteen-year-old for
looking her age
. Or are you upset that I’m walking proof that you’re wrong? Because I’m not ugly.”

Mom’s jaw drops. “I never said —”

“Yes, you did.” I try to resist the memory that starts flooding back to me.

“You’re just being silly.” She waves me away like she doesn’t have a clue what I’m talking about.

It kills me that she doesn’t even remember what happened. That one moment, one that was so inconsequential for her, molded the person that I am today.

It comes back to me like it was just yesterday, even though it was five years ago; Mac was about to turn three and I was eleven. We, of course, were at a pageant. I was jealous of all the attention Mac was getting from Mom. So I went up to my mother and said, “Mama, I want to do pageants, too.”

I know.
What was I thinking?

I thought this would make Mom happy. Dad had been gone for over a year and it was clear he wasn’t coming back. I figured it was something we all could do as a family. Plus, I wanted my mom to look at me the same way she looked at Mac. For her to be proud of me, like she was of her youngest child.

Mom looked me right in the eye and said, “Sweetie, pageants are for girls like your sister. You see how pretty those girls are. You’d be much better off concentrating on something you’re good at, like telling jokes. Everybody thinks you’re so funny. You’ve got a great personality, Lex. There’s no need for you to try to be pretty.” And then to add insult to injury, she looked me up and down and said, “You’ve got my genes, so no decent pageant gown would fit over your hips.”

I went on a diet right then and there. Although I knew that losing a few pounds would never make me the pretty one. What was the point? Her rejection made me want to do the
opposite
of being in a pageant. So that meant no fancy hair, no makeup, no flashy clothes, nothing overly girly. And no pink, ever.

I’ve been confined by my mom’s idea of me for so long, I almost forgot that I had the power to change myself. That I didn’t have to be what my mom thought of me. I could be whatever I wanted to be.

But all of that is lost on Mom, because she’s only concerned about Mac’s happiness.

Even now as she looks at me, it’s clear that she doesn’t have a clue at how much her words had hurt me. How those words continue to haunt
me. “You’re being incredibly selfish, Lexi. All of your sister’s hard work, and for what?”

And that’s the million dollar question:
What’s this all for?

I look over and see Mackenzie in tears. I don’t feel bad about preventing the show from filming us, but I do feel bad about making Mac cry. I kneel down to her. “Look, Mackenzie, I’m really sorry if you wanted to be on that show, but honestly, it would’ve been bad for you. I know I say things sometimes and I do think these pageants are a joke, but you’re my little sister. I’m trying to look out for you.”

She starts sobbing and I hold her. A wave of guilt encompasses my body. Maybe I should’ve kept my big mouth shut.

I hear Mac say something, but her mouth is up against my shoulder so I can’t hear her.

I pull away. “What did you say?”

“It’s okay, I didn’t want to do it anyways. Madison still gets made fun of for the tantrum she threw on her show.”

“Oh …”

I look up to see if this has changed Mom’s attitude. But alas, she still looks like she’s about to punch a hole through the wall.

Mackenzie goes over to her and puts her hand in Mom’s. “Mama, I’m sorry you’re mad, but I didn’t want to do it.”

Mom keeps looking at me in disgust. “You’re not saying that to protect your sister, are you?”

Protect me from
what
exactly? Or I guess it’s more of a
whom
.

Mac shakes her head. “I told you when you started filling out the application.”

Mom starts walking. Both Mac and I follow behind her, not sure what else to do. For a brief moment, I’m hoping, wishing that Mac’s admission might mean that Mom will drop it. That it is possible for her to listen to what her children are saying and realize that she’s in the wrong.

Mom stops for a second and turns around to address me. “We’re going. But let me make it clear that we are
not
finished with this.”

I
haven’t yet decided if I like being given the silent treatment.

On the one hand, I get to come and go as I please. Mom barely acknowledges me. Which is weird because Mackenzie has made it clear she didn’t want to be on the show. But I’m starting to think that for Mom the pageants aren’t really about Mac.

On the other hand, I feel like a visitor in my own home. Every time I open the door, I brace myself for some sort of confrontation, but usually it’s quiet. Mom has even stopped asking me to take Mac places. There’s a pageant this weekend, and for the first time ever, I don’t have to go. I’ve been hoping to get out of being the little errand girl for years,
but now I feel like I truly don’t belong here. I no longer have a place in my own home.

A line has been drawn. It’s them versus me.

I pick up the phone. I’ve wanted to do this for years, but it seems like now is as good a time as any.

He answers after the second ring. “Hello?”

Hearing his voice instantly make me feel better. “Hey, Dad.”

“Alexis! How’s my little princess?”

I smile at the nickname Dad’s had for me since I was little — a nickname that was given to me out of love, not a meaningless pageant title.

“I’m good. I was wondering if you wanted to come up this weekend. Mac and Mom have a pageant to go to and I’ll have the house to myself on Saturday. Or I could come to you?”

A red envelope on the end table catches my eye. I pick it up and see FINAL NOTICE written on it.

“Lexi?”

I didn’t hear anything that he just said. I place the overdue bill back where it was. “Um, sorry, what did you say?”

“I was just saying that I can’t believe you’d rather see your old man than throw a big raging party while you’re home alone!”

Yeah, well, I’m lame. And I don’t want people to see where I live. So I guess that makes me double lame.

“Of course I’d rather see you. Plus, I got my fake ID taken away after a bar fight last weekend, so no way to get a keg.”

I hear his laughter on the other end. “Oh, I’ve missed you, princess. Why don’t we meet halfway?”

A parent with some sense.

About time.

It has finally happened.

I’m on a date with Logan Reeves. It’s what I always dreamed of.

Okay, to be honest, in my dreams, his girlfriend wasn’t there. And I wasn’t with someone else, either.

But really, that’s just petty semantics.

I can’t help but smile to myself as the four of us sit at Mario’s Pizza.

Alyssa puts down her menu. “You guys get whatever you want. I’m only having a salad.”

I know that I can be annoying about food, but I’m the type of person who likes to splurge on special occasions. And this is definitely a special occasion. So unlike Sprouts Queen, I will be having pizza with the boys. A guy has got to like a girl who doesn’t eat like a rabbit.

At least I hope Logan does.

And Taylor.

Who I’m here with.

As if he can sense my thoughts, Taylor puts his arm around me. “Anything special you want on the pizza?”

“Nope, whatever you guys want.” I smile back at him. I wonder if seeing us together is making Logan jealous.

“So let’s get pepperoni —”

“Oh, wait, I don’t eat meat on pizza.” So much for being the low-maintenance one.

“Are you a vegetarian?” Alyssa asks.

“No, I just don’t like meat on pizza. It’s weird, I know. I … It’s no big deal, I can pick it off.”

Taylor shakes his head. “We can order half without meat.”

“Thanks.”

I study Taylor’s profile. He really is hot. And sweet. And kinda perfect.

So why exactly can’t I stop thinking about Logan, who now has his hand on Alyssa’s knee? And why does Alyssa look bored by all of this? Does she not realize how lucky she is?

Alyssa’s bag starts to vibrate. “Sorry!” she says as she digs through her large red purse. “It’s my pageant coach, be right back!”

Alyssa excuses herself, leaving me with Logan. And Taylor. Yes, Taylor.

“I hope it’s good news.” Logan stares out the window to where Alyssa is talking animatedly into her phone. “She’s been really stressed-out lately and not acting like herself. Everybody says she’s a shoo-in for Miss Teen Dallas this year, which means the Miss Teen Texas pageant this summer.” He crosses his fingers.

I burst out laughing.

He gives me a confused look. “What?”

I purse my lips and shake my head.

“C’mon!” He smiles at me. And I know it shouldn’t. I know I’m here with Taylor (I really do), but my heart still melts.

“Nothing. You sound exactly like a proud pageant mom.”

Logan looks at me in horror. “You did
not
just say that to me.”

“I only speak the truth. I mean,
maybe
I’ve caught you lip-synching to Alyssa’s talent song once … or forty times. Somewhere in that range — I’m not a hundred percent sure.”

Logan throws his napkin as me. “Like you don’t have your sister’s routine memorized. Unless you can’t booty pop like a seven-year-old.”

“Oh, I can booty pop. Trust me, Mackenzie learns
all
her moves from me.”

He raises his eyebrow. “I’m sure she does.”

“See, it seems like you’re mocking me, but at least
I’m
not a seventeen-year-old boy spending my weekends at beauty pageants, watching underage girls perform scandalous routines. I believe there are words for someone like you.”

“I think the word you’re looking for is
stud
.”

“Oh, that’s interesting, I was thinking more along the lines of a
pedophile
.”

“Do not compare me to Mr. Norman.”

“Eww!” I scream.

Logan covers his face up. “Can you believe that no one says anything when he sits back and records the toddlers?”

“And what deranged ‘talent agency’ would have someone like that represent them?”

“Does anybody fall for that?”

Now it’s time for me to cover my face. “
My mom
took his business card.”

Logan slams his hand on the table. “No, she did not! And by ‘business card,’ do you mean an old receipt with his number on it?”

“Wait, is that not how legitimate businessmen behave? So that guy who had this really cool van in the parking lot isn’t going to put me in his movie?
He said I had potential!
”

“What did I miss?” Alyssa sits back down.

Suddenly, reality comes crashing down around me.

Alyssa looks around the restaurant. “Where’s Taylor?”

Taylor’s not here?
When did he leave the table?

“He’s, um …” I look at Logan, who simply shrugs his shoulders. I excuse myself from the table and head toward the restroom, hoping to see Taylor on my way. I find him sitting on a bench near the entrance.

“Hey,” I say, “I was wondering where you went off to.”

He looks up at me and the warmness that was on his face just a few minutes ago is gone. “Oh, so you realized that I was at the table.”

“Of course, I knew —”

He cuts me off. “What was that with Logan?”

I sit down next to him. “I’m really sorry, it’s silly inside pageant stuff. I didn’t mean to exclude you — it’s what we do to get through those agonizing weekends.”

“Yeah, looks like
torture
.”

I don’t know what to say. Of course I had to mess this up.
Of course
. I mean, yeah, for a split second I thought I was on a date with Logan, but what I did wasn’t fair to Taylor. I should’ve known better. He deserves better.

And maybe I do, too. Maybe I should stop pining after someone who (a) isn’t available and (b) clearly isn’t interested. Especially when I have someone right here in front of me who’s pretty great.

“Listen.” I place my hand on his knee. “If you want, we can go back to my house and I can make my sister perform her entire pageant routine. You really haven’t lived until you’ve seen a seven-year-old dance to ‘It’s Raining Men’ with an umbrella and glitter. It really is spectacular.”

I see the corner of his mouth turn up.

“And I’m sure if we ask really nicely, she can lend you one of her crowns so you can experience what it’s like to be superior. I think you’d look great with a faux diamond tiara on your forehead.”

I’ve got a full smile from him now. He shakes his head. “Sorry about that. It was weird, I felt like I was the third wheel. I guess maybe I should’ve thought of something else for us to do on our second
real
date since I’m clearly not ready to share you yet.”

“We’ll make up an excuse after pizza and go somewhere, just the two of us.”

He leans in. “That sounds like a plan.”

Butterflies start circling my stomach as Taylor doesn’t drop his gaze. And I don’t want to turn away. He takes my chin in the palm of his hand and draws me closer to him. Our lips touch and I close my eyes.
The fact that we’re in the middle of a restaurant doesn’t bother me because all I can feel is his warm lips on mine.

When we finally part, the fact that we
are
in public causes my cheeks to burn.

“Oh, hey, man.” I follow Taylor’s gaze to find Logan staring at us with wide eyes.

He scratches his head and motions toward the table. “Yeah, um, wanted you to know the pizza’s here.”

“Cool.” Taylor nods at Logan. Logan pauses for a minute before he heads back to Alyssa.

Taylor turns to me with a crooked smile. “Sorry.” He tucks a stray piece of hair behind my ear. “I couldn’t help myself. Next time, I’ll make sure we’re totally alone. Sound good?”

I nod, but can’t hide a ridiculous smile that’s spreading across my face.

I finally had my first kiss. And it was good. Very, very good.

And the fact that Logan walked in on it?

Even better.