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Authors: Andy Mulligan

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BOOK: Ribblestrop Forever!
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To the so-called headmaster of Ribblestrop,

So-called ‘school’ for dysfunctional reprobates and vandals.

That was just the opening.

You are ordered, by law, to vacate these premises. You are instructed to pack your bags, as I’ve got a court order now, so I’m changing the locks and hiring a security firm . .
.’

The rest of the letter degenerated into obscenities, so he pushed it to one side, wincing. Beneath it was an altogether more charming communication from the new sports teacher at Ribblestrop
High. Since the sacking of Gary Cuthbertson – brother to the infamous ex-police inspector, Percy Cuthbertson – a closer tie with local schools seemed possible. The new coach there was a
Mr Johnny Jay, and he seemed positively friendly. He was reminding the headmaster about a match they’d confirmed, saying how much he was looking forward to it. The headmaster wrote the date
in his diary and wondered where the football had been stored.

The phone rang again and he ignored it.

He turned back to his song lyrics and was seized by inspiration.


Ribblestrop, Ribblestrop, what a lovely day!

This is where we come to work, and where we come to play.

It was promising. He could imagine the orphans in particular singing it with gusto. He had missed them so much, for a school without children was a forlorn place. The least he could do was have
everything ready for their return, so he stood up with his notes and prepared to try the words out loud. At that moment, the phone rang again, and he swung round, hunting for a missile to throw at
the parrots. This time, however, he noticed that the receiver was visibly vibrating in its cradle. He snatched it up and put on his most responsible voice.

‘Ribblestrop Towers,’ he said. ‘Headmaster speaking.’

‘Oh, Giles. Thank goodness.’

It was Professor Worthington, and the relief in her voice was palpable. She sounded close to tears.

‘Hello, Clarissa. Where are you?’

There was a silence.

‘Giles,’ said the Professor, at last. ‘Where have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you for the last two hours.’

‘I’m so sorry. I didn’t think it was a real call. How are you getting on? By the way, I had a thought about supper. Why don’t we just order a huge load of fish and
chips—’

‘Giles?’

‘And I had a call from Sanchez’s father. Mrs Tack as well, and it all seems fine. They’re on the road at the moment.’

‘Giles, I’ve got something to tell you. Can you listen to me, please?’

‘Yes, of course. You’ve met up with the orphans, I assume?’

‘Are you sitting down?’

‘What’s wrong?’

‘We’ve lost our school.’

The headmaster was silent for a moment. ‘Who has?’ he said.

‘We have. Doonan, Routon and I. We had everyone together, but various accidents have occurred, and—’

‘Are you still at Heathrow?’

‘No! No, we left Heathrow ages ago. We had them all in the bus. And we . . . met up with Sam and Oli and Ruskin. And then we ran into problems.’

‘Where are you, Clarissa?’

‘I’m in a police station, Giles. We’ve all been arrested, pending a full-scale investigation of traffic violations – and that includes air traffic. But the children
aren’t with us. They’re gone.’

‘What? How?’

‘We’ve been arrested for endangering the lives of . . . well, just about everyone, I think. And we’ve caused about a billion pounds’ worth of damage. The thing is, Giles,
the children slipped away and nobody’s looking for them. They just disappeared into the river and the helicopter wouldn’t go after them, so . . . we’ve lost our school!’

There was a silence.

‘Where?’ said the headmaster, at last.

‘On the edge of Ribblemoor. In a river. How soon can you get here?’

The roofless bus had slipped into the river and sunk like a stone. Water filled the vehicle in about five seconds and the bus was soon sucked out into the deepest channel.
Doonan had managed to shout, ‘Swim for it! Everybody – ahh!’ before the deluge had swept him under the seats, filling his lungs in an instant. Captain Routon was a strong swimmer
and grabbed the young man by his belt. He was soon up and out, kicking against the vortex that was swirling around them. They broke the surface together and a fisherman on the shore threw them a
lifebelt. Other heads were popping up one after another, and in an instant Routon and the Professor were diving to look for those who might be trapped. There was zero visibility, however, and the
only way they could do it was by touch. Routon went back in the bus, swimming among the seats, mindful that he only had enough air to search a fraction of the area. When he surfaced for the second
time, he saw Professor Worthington crawling up the bank with the dazed pilot under her arm. A human chain was forming, but now Sam and Oli were nowhere to be seen. He also saw that the long trailer
he’d been pulling had broken free of the bus, and was afloat some way out to midstream. A lot of the children were clinging to it and, as he watched, he saw one child diving back into the
river, presumably to search for the missing.

He took a great lungful of air and plunged again.

Ruskin was in difficulties. He had rushed gallantly into the water, determined to save his friends, and only when he was completely out of his depth and sinking fast did he remember that he
couldn’t swim. He hadn’t even taken his blazer off and it was waterlogged at once. His school shoes were soon deep in mud and, as he flailed blindly, it was a stroke of luck that he
caught Imagio’s elbow as he swam by. Imagio grabbed his wrists and towed him to the trailer. Then he too jumped back in for another search.

The two smallest orphans, Kenji and Ron, did a head-count. Amazingly, once Anjoli, Miles and Millie had been called in from a splashing fight, everyone was accounted for. The trailer they were
on, however, was drifting fast. It was caught in a strong current and was already more than a hundred metres from the bank. They could see policemen in the distance, struggling through the
undergrowth in pursuit – but they were disappearing behind a line of trees. The policemen were shouting and whistles were blowing but they had little chance of keeping up, because the craft
was so buoyant and the river so fast. The adults watched in disbelief as the children floated behind an island, out of sight. The boys and Millie sat clutching each other, gazing back – they
were helpless to steer or paddle, and in another half-minute the blue flashing lights, the bridge and all the spectators had simply been erased from the landscape.

A strange silence fell.

‘We’re on our own,’ said Sam, quietly.

‘Totally,’ said Ruskin.

‘I didn’t say goodbye to my dad. He drove us all this way and I didn’t even say thank you.’

‘What about Captain Routon?’ said Oli. ‘We didn’t get a chance to thank him.’

‘What if we swim for it?’ said Miles. ‘We could probably make it.’

‘No way,’ said Sanjay.

‘I could swim that,’ said Anjoli. ‘I could swim back there.’

‘You want a race?’ said Vijay, pulling his shirt off. ‘First one back to the road and you’ve got to touch—’

‘No!’ shouted Asilah, grabbing hold of him. ‘No way. You just sit down – all of you – and you stay sat down. All right?’

‘We’re lucky to be alive,’ said Sanchez. ‘That was the most amazing bit of flying I’ve ever seen, Millie. That was a miracle.’

‘It was Oli’s plan,’ said Millie. ‘He’s the genius.’

‘How did it happen?’ said Imagio. ‘We’re just on our way back to school and . . . it was like a disaster movie. And what do we do now?’

‘What can we do?’ said Tomaz. ‘We just have to wait, I guess. They’ll follow us, won’t they? They’ll send that helicopter.’

‘Stay together, that’s for sure,’ said Sanchez. ‘I suppose everyone’s phones are ruined?’

Miles, Millie and Oli pulled them out of their pockets and water streamed from the cases.

‘I might be able to clean Sam’s,’ said Oli. ‘The circuitry’s pretty basic, but it won’t be a quick job.’

‘Do your best,’ said Sanchez. ‘We need to get back to civilisation – Captain Routon’s going to be worried sick about us.’ He turned to Asilah. ‘Why is
it that getting to school always involves these . . . diversions? Whenever we split up, that’s when the trouble happens. If we stay together, we’ll be safe.’

‘I say we just go with the flow,’ said Eric. ‘They’ll find us soon enough.’

‘They’ll be round the next bend,’ said Miles. He laughed. ‘This is our last few minutes of freedom, guys, we might as well enjoy it. I’ve been here before, by the
way. I’m sure of it.’

‘What do you mean?’ said Millie. ‘When?’

‘I don’t know. It’s just familiar.’

‘We can’t be that far from school,’ said Asilah. ‘We’d driven for hours and I saw a sign to Ribblemoor.’

‘Did you see the faces of those policemen?’ said Vijay, grinning.

Eric laughed. ‘The ones by the river? They were not happy getting their shoes wet.’

‘There’s going to be a lot of angry people back there,’ said Millie, and there were murmurs of agreement. ‘We’ll be on the news again. I think we’re best off
getting as far away as possible – hiding out, even. I mean, how much does a plane cost? We smashed it to bits.’

‘And a bus. And two police cars. You think we killed anyone?’

‘I don’t think so,’ said Sanchez.

‘Fine,’ said Imagio. ‘Let’s just keep going and see where we end up. If we see a house or a bridge or something, we can stop and make a phonecall.’

‘It’s a very pretty river,’ said Sam. ‘I just saw a kingfisher.’

Chapter Six

After another half-hour, the river divided for the third time.

‘How far do you think we’ve come?’ said Sanchez.

‘A long way,’ said Tomaz. ‘It’s a maze, isn’t it? They’re never going to find us – and there’s still no one about.’

‘Hold on, that’s not a field,’ said Ruskin. ‘Look to the right – look how flat the grass is.’

‘That’s a cricket pitch,’ said Asilah.

‘There’s one on the left, as well.’

Miles was staring, screwing up his eyes. ‘I have been here before!’ he said. ‘I thought I recognised it, way back. I know this place, I’m sure of it.’

‘You are such an attention-seeker,’ said Millie. ‘When have you been floating on a river?’

‘It’s The Priory,’ said Miles. ‘On the edge of the moor – The Priory School. These are the playing fields.’ He stood up and went to the prow.

Sanjay said, ‘There’s a sign coming up.’


Private property
,’ read Israel. ‘How can you make a river private?’

‘There’s something written under it.’

They came closer and peered at a line of smaller letters.

‘Miles is right,’ said Vijay. ‘It’s just what he says:
Property of The Priory
. I guess they mean the land’s private and they don’t want trespassers.
Oh, and look at that.’ He read carefully. ‘
These premises are patrolled by Stillwater Security Sytems. SSS.

‘You think they’re guarding the fish?’ said Anjoli.

‘You think they’re watching us?’ said Sam.

Miles was still gazing around him. ‘It’s my old school,’ he said, quietly.

‘Which one?’ said Millie.

Miles ignored her. ‘You can see the pavilion. And the chapel, on the other side of those trees – can you see the spire? This is the worst school in the world.’

‘It looks quite grand,’ said Ruskin. ‘Do you think they’d help us?’

Sure enough, some formidably grey school buildings were emerging, the windows blank and black. The river bent to the right and took the children closer, under a line of willows. There
wasn’t a pupil or teacher in sight, and still nothing but birdsong.

‘You really went here?’ said Israel. ‘You must be loaded.’

‘When was it?’ said Tomaz.

‘Two years ago. I was eleven.’

‘Is it as posh as it looks?’ said Sam.

‘Oh yes,’ said Miles. ‘The poshest, snobbiest place I’ve ever been. I got kicked out and went up to some dump in Scotland. Then I went to Canada.’

‘It certainly has character,’ said Ruskin. ‘The facilities look excellent. Oh, and there’s another sign—’

‘It was a prison camp,’ said Miles. ‘Look! You can see some of the kids in the distance.’

Everyone strained their eyes and, sure enough, a line of blue-clad figures jogged out of the trees. They kept in strict formation, trotted round the pavilion, and disappeared again.

‘I could tell you some stories,’ Miles whispered. ‘And I’ll tell you something else: we don’t want to get caught here. I want to get back to Ribblestrop.’

‘We’re being filmed,’ said Vijay. ‘Everyone smile.’

They were floating slowly under a spread of tree branches, and the next sign was right overhead, bigger than ever.
Stillwater Security Systems,
it read.
We are watching you!
A
small black camera sat at the centre of the sign and Miles made an obscene gesture at it.

‘How do we get home?’ said Asilah. ‘That’s the question, isn’t it? Does the river lead anywhere?’

‘I can’t remember,’ said Miles. ‘There was a whole maze of rivers, all round the grounds – and we weren’t allowed to go near them. If you were caught playing
by the river, you got a Sunday detention. Or worse. I think we just need to keep going.’

‘Why did they kick you out?’ said Eric.

Miles shook his head. ‘You won’t believe me if I tell you. Let’s go left here – it might take us away from the place. All we did was work and do cross-country running and
tests the whole time . . . I hated it. Go left – please!’

The children on the right side of the trailer paddled as best they could, for the river was dividing again. Vijay leapt onto the bank and found a couple of long branches. He re-joined the craft
and he and Asilah punted them in the direction Miles had suggested. The river narrowed at once and took them past yet another cricket field and a row of huts. After some time, the land turned to
fields again, but their way was suddenly blocked. There was an iron bar stretched right across the water, wrapped in barbed wire.

Strictly private
, said a sign.
The Priory School – Rector’s House. No admittance to pupils or public.

BOOK: Ribblestrop Forever!
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