Ring of Fire Book Two of the McKay's (2 page)

Different than
most of the other cowboys, Hank seemed so self-assured and confident of what he was doing. Yet he was no show-off. He'd waited until she went inside to master a ride from Thunder. She didn't doubt for a moment he was a "bad ass" cowboy. He was much too handsome and devilish not to be. But she was silently grateful that he hadn't shown her up on Thunder.

She wondered if she handled that first meeting well or not.

Had she made an impression on him? She doubted it.

Not that it mattered.
He was a hand here, and she shouldn't mix. Telling herself that was one thing, doing it another, for Letty had always been the real rebel of the family, defying rules and regulations her father had set forth. Oddly enough, her father had admired that about her.

Her dad had spent years explaining his daughters would not date a ranch hand.
But Hank was intriguing, and she couldn't deny she reacted to him.

Besides, Dad was gone now and she had to face that and get on with her life.

Intriguing? Hank Silver acted different.

But then what did she know about anyone around here
? She hadn't so much as bothered with a man in a long time. Not that they didn't try to wine and dine her, but since moving home her interests had changed.

She was changing every day.

She didn't understand it any more than anyone else. She'd never been one of her daddy's cowgirl daughters. She did what she did on the ranch with humility. She rode because she enjoyed it, and for no other reason. Her father had come to respect that about her, and there had been an easy banter with him most of her life, because she used no pretense. She was as open with him and he was with her. He had understood her better than anyone. She silently missed him more every day she was home. The ranch didn't feel right without him. Without her father, the ranch was just a puzzle without the last piece.

If it weren't for Julie, she'd feel like an outsider.
Only Julie seemed to know and understand the real Letty McKay.

She ran the tub in the connecting bathroom full of water and stretched out, after locking the doors so she wouldn't be disturbed. She let the water ripple over her as she took a washcloth and soaped it up.

But the moment she touched herself she tingled and that shocked her.

What a new experience. She couldn't ever remember tingling.

She shrugged it off but as the water poured from the rag, it ignited her senses. What was wrong? She hadn't been sexually stimulated since she began law school.

And naturally so, she had to fight tooth and nail to get respect and good grades.
She'd been too busy trying to earn the respect of her male peers to get too deeply involved.

The struggle with managing a job and an education
had been getting to her just before the letter came about her father. Without another thought, she dropped everything and ran home, nothing mattered but getting home. And when she walked into the house she had been born in, her heart sank that her father wasn't there yelling a hello at her from another room. The feel of him was there, as though he had just stepped out for a moment, but he was not there.

She sq
ueezed her eyes shut and quickly blocked out the call she received from Wade about her father. Wade had told her he was contacting all of them personally, as her father would have wanted. After he announced her father's death, Letty remembered nothing of their conversation. In fact, she had dropped the phone and ran to the closet, plopped down in the floor, and curled herself into the fetal position, holding herself in a ball, not crying, not making a sound.

No one would ever know…but herself.

In a few weeks of being home, she found her moods becoming more relaxed and comfortable. The tension from school was lessening. What had happened there on a night that was supposed to be a celebration was burning into her memory, but she had purposely blocked it and tried to forget it. Not into self-pity, she didn't dwell on the negatives of life, but survived despite them, like her father.

It would be a long time before she trusted a man again
though. At least that was what she told herself.

She glanced around her room. S
he was alone, but a shiver ran through her.

Sighing
, a tear escaped down her cheek. Another thing she hadn't done in a long time, cried. A sadness from deep within swelled within her. Now, here, alone, she let the tears roll down her cheeks. It had been weeks since the funeral, but the rawness of it hit her hard.

She knew this moment would come, but she thought it would come with more dignity.
His voice haunted her. She splayed herself with water over her face and washed the tears away, determined to be strong. Everyone thought Letty was the strong one, if only they knew her.

But it wasn't her father, law school, or anything else
except those soulful eyes of Hank Silver that made her shiver now as she soaped her breast. He couldn't be as bad as some she had met in law school, one in particular. She ran the washrag around her body as she forced those thoughts from her.

"Good grief, what's wrong with me
? He's just a plain ranch hand."

Or was he?

Why did a self-assured man like that, work as a ranch hand?

Why didn't he have his own place in life? He had the same kind of command that Wade and Cade exercised every day.

Then she shook her head. "No, he isn't just a ranch hand. There's nothing plain or simple about Hank Silver. He's fascinating. There's something very different and sexy about him, but I'll never let him know I see it." Her voice lowered as though she were keeping a secret. She scrubbed herself hard, as though scrubbing could erase the errors in judgments she had used.

"Who am I kidding, I was lonely at college. Me…who would believe that?"
It's not that she didn't have men interested in her most of the time; it was that she wasn't interested in them. Not since Eric had she seriously dated. She had plenty of male friends, men she loved talking to, learning from, but none of them held any spark for her and she wondered what was wrong with her. Why wasn't she attracted to any of them, some of them law majors like herself, smart, confident, affluent, but there was something lacking and she didn't know what it was. She had secretly searched for what her heart ached for, but never found it. Had Eric ruined her life for the future? Would she allow him to?

No, she was stronger than that and she would never allow it to happen again.

Buck up!

Her father's words echoed in her ears.

Date rape wasn't something you talked about. She had so trusted Eric. She never once suspected his true character. He had disguised it so well. But Letty had been brought up strong, and able to go on by the character she missed the most, her father. She would not let Eric ruin her future. She was a McKay and McKay's didn't yield.

D
etermined not to wallow in self-pity she changed her direction of thought.

Awareness sprang forward once more
as the warm water continued to relax her. This was the first sign that maybe she had healed; maybe she could learn to trust again. She would not overlook her sudden fascination with Hank Silver. Although merely a ranch hand, there was something much deeper within Hank that had her paying attention.

Hank
carried himself differently, lazy, relaxed, and sexy as all get out. Her nipples puckered at the thought.

Letty glanced down at herself, realizing this was the first time since Eric that she instantly felt a real attraction.
"This is insane!" she admonished aloud. "Just thinking about the cowboy gives me goose bumps."

She scrubbed herself hard for a minute then leaned back and relaxed.

Big mistake! Thoughts of Hank Silver lying on top of her, kissing her, and touching her sent her blood pressure to boiling points. What was wrong with her, she'd been around many men that were more suave, more attractive even. But Hank Silver pushed her buttons with a mere crooked smile. One look into his warm brown eyed stare captured something within Letty that astounded her.

She thought about his looks, he was dark haired, dark eyed and his body was almost to the point of graceful when he walked. His smile although crooked was sexy. She'd found him oddly attractive ever since she first noticed him the day he hired on to break some wild horses. Like the wild horses himself
, he reeked of rebel. She liked that. He was from the old school of cowboy, she recognized that instantly in him and it attracted her too.

She closed her eyes and let the dream
take hold. It was so pleasant, so much coming together, so much erotic touching. She could feel his hands exploring her, his eyes devouring her, and his lips caressing her.

"Get a grip!" she hollered as her eyes popped open. Good grief, she'd just met the man, and already she was having erotic dreams about him. She'd never indulged in such a thing. And yet, her mind began to wander, what would it hurt. After all, it wasn't reality!

She moved the washrag over her breast and closed her eyes as she felt the warmth of his lips caressing the tips and pulling gently. She sighed aloud!

She indulged in the fantasy for several long moments, feeling the gentle swell of arousal, then her eyes flashed open and she
shook her head. "This is so outrageous. He's a common cowboy, for God's sake!"

She almost
laughed; no one would believe that Letty McKay was still a virgin. Even though Eric had actually tried to rape her, and had deliberately hurt her. He had only physically hurt her. Her soul was still intact; she was still a virgin, as she had never given herself to any man. She deliberately shut out the damage he tried to force upon her. She'd been strong while Eric tried his best to destroy her, but she walked away, untouched.

She never told a soul about the
incident. No one. No one knew why she suddenly quit seeing the infamous law student with such promise. There was no one to confide in. Most of the female law students thought Eric was the only man to have. Most of them would have given in to him willingly. But not Letty McKay. She put a higher price on her own head and heart.

Yet despite
her victory that night, Eric killed something precious within her too…her trust.

Although Letty gave off the appearance to the world that she was worldly and knew so much more about life, she was still just a twenty five year old virgin.
She doubted even her sisters would believe it. But that was the truth and her body seemed to scream it.

My heart has been violated! And it would take a heck
of a man to earn her trust again.

And tha
t's how she had handled that night, silently, with dignity. He hadn't destroyed her heart, only her dignity for the moment.

Deliberately she started scrubbing the rest of her body and ignoring the fantasy, thinking it was gone. But it wasn't. When she touched her private parts, her body reacted violently. Without thinking further, she stood up, rinsed herself and got out.

Letty disciplined herself around men, long ago. She had to. Law students were ruthless in the classroom, and just as ruthless in their lives. They usually drank and partied harder than other students.

Eric Atherton was no exception, other than being the most attractive man in the school. Every girl wanted him. And when Letty finally won his attention, t
he last thing she expected was him forcing himself on her. He didn't have to; Letty was as smitten as the next. Until he'd tried to make love to her and it turned sour. Unable to take no for an answer, Eric became violent, accusing her of being a tease. He'd slapped her around, but he hadn't succeeded in raping her.

Had she been a tease? That question puzzled her for so long. She
'd been very attracted to him, wanted his attention. However, she never once dreamed her own rejection of sex would lead him to violence. His hard slap to her face had jolted her from semi-aroused to completely defensive.

Letty often wondered if she did others a disservice by not reporting him.

But she was angry, angry that she had succumbed to his charms in the first place. Angry that she hadn't been able to see it coming, she blamed herself for a long time afterwards. It took the rest of her junior year to try to forget it, to force it to the recesses of her mind. And she never dated again. She concentrated strictly on her studies, determined to get her degree.

Her girlfriends didn’t understand the extreme change in her, and she wasn
't about to explain it to them.

Letty resolved never again would a man capture her heart. She'd dedicated her
life to starting her own firm. Nothing was going to stand in her way. And yet, even as determined as she seemed, something had gone out of her life that night that Eric hurt her. Like a light being turned off, her passion for justice faded. Her love of man faded, until she met a gracefully shy man, Hank Silver.

Why had Hank changed things?
He hadn't asked her out, or been overly flirtatious, and yet she suspected he didn't dally with many women. Perhaps Hank was the balm she needed to survive and get out of her funk.