Secrets (15 page)

“Ellie?”

She realized she’d spoken the last thought aloud. “Sorry,” she said quickly.

“It’s OK. You probably don’t want to talk about it. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, it’s all right. It would have been strange if you hadn’t, but I don’t want to talk about it any more.”

Joe’s eyes were full of understanding. “Sure. Come on. They’ve cooled down now. Let’s have another canter.” They picked up their reins and let the ponies canter on through the trees.

Chapter Fifteen

LEADING ROCKY TO THE CIRCULAR
ring beside the car park the next morning, Ellie felt excited. Joe was walking beside her, a saddle and bridle slung over his arm. White clouds fluffed out across the pale blue sky.

“You really think I should do it?” Ellie said. She’d seen Joe doing join-up with horses before and putting a saddle and bridle on them for the first time, but she’d never done it herself.

“Definitely. He trusts you. From what you’ve said, he’s had a traumatic time being broken in before. It’s better that it’s you who works with him now.” Joe’s green eyes met hers. “And I know you can do it.”

Ellie bit back her grin. She had to stay calm. Just like when she was connecting with horses, she needed to be steady, focused.

Once in the ring she unclipped Rocky’s leadrope. He gave her an uncertain look and came towards her, nudging her with his nose as if to say
what are you doing?

“It’s OK,” she reassured him. “Trust me.”

“Send him away!” Joe called from the gate. Ellie lifted her arms. With a snort, but not looking too alarmed, Rocky trotted away to the fence and around the ring.

Ellie knew that she had to send him away from her, chase him on, let him run from her for as long as he wanted and then, when he showed with his body language that he was tired of running and wanted to come and be close and stand still, she had to respond and let him. Swinging the leadrope and using her arms, she drove Rocky on, positioning her body square to his. He plunged into a canter and cantered around the school. Ellie watched him like a hawk. She knew join-up worked, but she also knew Rocky and knew they had a special relationship. If he showed any signs of being scared or seriously stressed by what she was doing, she would stop. But he didn’t. He cantered fast, but he didn’t look scared.

“Block his movement, send him the other way!” Joe called. Moving quickly so her body was aimed in front of Rocky’s head, Ellie lifted her arms. The bay bounced to a stop, wheeled around and cantered in the other direction. Several times, Ellie repeated the action. She knew that this part, the sending away, was vital; it mirrored how mares treated young horses in the herd. Sending them away, waiting for signs of submission, and then letting them close.

Rocky didn’t have to canter around long before he was looking to come close to her. First his inside ears seemed to fix on her, then he slowed to a trot, his head reaching down to the ground. Within one more circuit he had started to lick and chew. Ellie knew the signs. They were similar in many ways to the ones a horse gave when healing was working.

“Drop your gaze! Turn away from him!” Joe called.

But Ellie was already doing it. Turning sideways on to the horse, she made her body language as unthreatening as possible, dropping her shoulders, avoiding eye contact. She kept moving on the spot so that her side was always to him. She heard his trot slow to a walk. Hearing him stop and snort, she waited. He only hesitated a second before walking over to her and touching her shoulder with his muzzle.

“That was brilliant,” Joe said as Ellie rubbed Rocky’s neck. “Most horses won’t come in at first; you have to send them away again and again. Work your hands over him.”

Ellie stroked Rocky all over, across his back, down his legs, over his face, and then she walked away. With a snort, he followed her, just like a very large dog. Wherever she went, so did he.

Her heart leaped in her chest as she stopped again and stroked him. He’d joined-up with her. It had been easier than she’d dared to imagine.

“Try sending him away again,” advised Joe.

She did, but within a few circuits Rocky asked to come close, and when she stopped sending him, he trotted in and halted beside her.

“He’s a natural at this,” said Joe, smiling. “You’re a real quick learner, aren’t you, Rocky? I think he’s ready to try some tack,” said Joe as Ellie walked over to the gate with Rocky following.

Given everything Rocky had been through, Ellie was astonished when he let them put on the saddle and bridle without a fuss. He nuzzled her, absolute trust in his eyes. She led him around and then Joe came into the ring and mounted. They had decided it would be best if Ellie could be beside Rocky to soothe and reassure him.

His ears flickered as Joe got on and for a moment he tensed, but as Ellie stroked him and murmured to him, his head lowered and he relaxed. She led Joe around the ring and then he dismounted and legged her up into the saddle. Like any young horse, Rocky was slightly unbalanced by having a rider on his back, but he walked out willingly, halting when she applied the gentlest pressure on his mouth and walking on when she touched him gently with her heels.

“It’s amazing!” she said to Joe, beaming from ear to ear and patting Rocky. “If you’d seen what he did with Uncle Len, you wouldn’t believe it was the same horse.”

“Shows what can be done if you work with the horse,” said Joe. “And not try and force them.”

They heard the sound of a car’s engine coming down the lane. It was Anna Hallett. She drove into the car park and stepped out of the sports car.

“Is that Rocky?” she said, coming to the gate.

Ellie nodded. “We’ve just got on him for the first time.” Stuart had decided it would be best not to mention to the Halletts that Rocky was the horse responsible for Len’s fall.

“Oh.” Anna turned away. “Where’s Luke?”

Ellie didn’t need to answer—having heard the car, Luke appeared. “Hey,” he said, spotting Ellie on Rocky. “You’re riding him!”

“Yeah, look!” Ellie rode Rocky around the school, halted him and then walked him on again, patting him a lot. He walked with his ears pricked as if wondering what all the fuss was about. Ellie looked at Luke, the atmosphere between them forgotten in her delight. “Isn’t it great?”

“It’s amazing!” Luke grinned. “My theory has to be right. That is no way the same horse.”

They smiled at the shared joke and Ellie felt her heart flip.

“I don’t actually see what’s
that
amazing,” said Anna, flicking her ponytail. “I mean, he’s just walking and halting.”

“But if you’d seen what he was like when Len … when someone first got on him,” said Luke. “He was mad. Ellie’s done an incredible job.” He smiled at her again.

“Joe as well,” Ellie said, not wanting to take all the credit. “He helped me do the join-up.”

“It’s nothing really to do with me. You did everything with him. I’ve just been watching. You’ll have him trotting tomorrow by the looks of things.”

“Awesome!” said Luke.

“It’s not that big a deal!” snapped Anna

Luke turned to her. “It
is
that big a deal. Surely even you can see that?”

“What do you mean, even
I
can see that?”

“What I said!”

Anna glared at him and marched away up the yard.

“Oh, for heaven’s sake.” Luke groaned and rolled his eyes, then went after her.

Joe chuckled. “Look’s as if Luke’s got his hands full.” Ellie nodded and tried not to think about it. She dismounted. “Rocky’s done enough for today. Let’s take him in.”

In the afternoon, Joe and Luke went to see Len. In the evening, just Ellie and Joe were in the house. Luke had gone off to meet Anna, although Ellie had picked up a feeling he wasn’t that happy about it. Still, she was glad. It was lovely being on her own with Joe.

“So what did you think when you saw your dad?” she asked as they ate jacket potatoes loaded with butter and cheese in front of the TV.

“Well, Luke was right. He’s in a foul mood. He’s going to be unbearable when he comes home.”

“When will that be?” Ellie wished she could feel happier at the thought of her uncle leaving hospital, but it was hard.

“Tomorrow, I think. So how’s he been generally? I mean, before the accident?”

“Worse than ever,” replied Ellie. “He was OK at Hickstead, but the rest of the time …” She shook her head. “I don’t know, it’s as if the horses are machines to him now.” She looked at Joe to see if he understood. “He just calls them ‘it’ or ‘that bay’, or sometimes even ‘that animal’.”

“I know. He was becoming more like that before I left,” Joe admitted. “I suppose I didn’t really notice it until I went to Canada and stayed with Ray. He’s so not like that. He strokes all the horses, calls them by name, spends time with them. He still seems to like riding as well. Whereas Dad … yeah, you’re right, it’s as if they’re machines. He didn’t used to be like this.” He sighed. “I wish I could get him to change.”

He looked so downcast that Ellie changed the subject. “Come on, tell me more about Canada and your friends there.” She took a mouthful of jacket potato. “Lucy seems to text you quite a lot.” She shot him a sideways look. From the photos she’d seen on his phone, Lucy looked pretty. She had lots of curly hair and green eyes, very like Joe’s.

“Oh, Lucy’s just Lucy.” Joe shrugged, but Ellie saw the faint telltale blush on his cheekbones and noticed how he was avoiding her gaze.

“Are you going out with her?” she asked directly.

“No …” There was a slight hesitation in his voice.

“Not yet?” prompted Ellie, filling in the gaps.

“Not yet,” admitted Joe.

Ellie paused, wondering how she felt about Joe going out with someone else, but she was relieved that she didn’t really mind. She’d mind if Joe went out with someone not nice, someone who didn’t treat him well, but that was it. He was her friend now, nothing more. Joe ran a hand through his hair. “I dunno. She might not like me anyway—not in that way.”

“I’d say, judging by the number of texts she sends, she does,” said Ellie wryly.

Joe looked at her. “Do you mind?”

“No,” she said honestly, hearing the worry in his voice. “So what’s she like?”

“Nice. Like you in a way, but not as mad.”

“So boring then?” Ellie raised her eyebrows teasingly.

“Not boring. Just a bit … a bit safer.” He rushed on, seeing her expression. “I love you, Els. You know that, but even if we weren’t cousins, it would never have worked. You’re amazing—the coolest person I know—you’re so unstoppable, but I can’t be like that. We wouldn’t be right for each other. You need someone who’s more like you—someone else.”

A picture of Luke came into Ellie’s head. She pushed it angrily away. “I wish people would stop telling me I need someone else,” she muttered.

Joe looked puzzled. “What?”

Ellie shook her head. “It doesn’t matter,” she sighed.

“No, what did you mean?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

Joe nodded. “Sure.” He turned back to his jacket potato.

She inwardly shook her head. It was so Joe. He’d never push anything, he’d always back off. He was right. They were the best of friends, but they would never have been right for each other. “So,” she said, forcing lightness into her voice as she added more butter to her potato, “tell me more about Lucy. How old is she? Why else do you like her so much?”

Joe smiled and began to talk.

They didn’t stay up late that night. Ellie had just gone to bed when she heard Luke return unusually early. He wasn’t in the best of the moods by the sound of it. He slammed the back door and then his bedroom door.

Maybe his date with Anna hadn’t gone that well then. Trying not to feel too pleased at the thought, Ellie rolled over and shut her eyes.

Luke was still in a bad mood the next morning. Ellie went down to the kitchen to find him banging a carton of milk down on the side because the tab on the foil top under the cap had broken off, leaving him unable to pour the milk.

“What’s the matter with you?” Ellie asked, fetching some scissors and cutting open the foil as he leaned back against the sink, arms folded across his chest.

Luke took a breath and for a moment she thought he would tell her, but then he shook his head and walked out of the kitchen.

“Do you want a coffee?” she called, seeing the mug on the side with coffee granules in it.

He didn’t answer as the back door slammed behind him.

“Temper, temper,” Ellie muttered, but she felt surprised. Luke was hardly ever in a bad mood.

Later that morning she found out why. Grooming Rocky, she heard Helen go into the stall next door, where Sasha was brushing Lexi over. “Have you heard the latest?” Helen said.

“What?”

“Luke and Miss I’ve-Got-A-Rich-Daddy have split up.”

Ellie paused in her grooming.

“She dumped him!” Sasha’s voice was incredulous.

“No,
he
dumped her.”

“Why?”

“Her personality bypass maybe?” Helen chuckled.

Ellie realized that she had paused with the body brush in mid-air. So Luke and Anna had split up! She cursed herself as she felt her hopes leap. He wasn’t interested in her. She knew that.

“Hang on, if Luke dumped her, why’s he in such a bad mood this morning?” said Sasha, repeating exactly Ellie’s next thought.

“Who knows? Maybe he doesn’t have a replacement or three lined up yet. He might have a day or two without a girlfriend.”

Both grooms giggled.

Ellie carried on grooming, but inside her heart was jumping up and down. Determined to ignore it, she swept the brush over Rocky’s coat with such force that he turned and gave her a very puzzled look.

Luke seemed just as determined as ever to avoid Ellie that day and for once she had absolutely no idea what was going on his head, but at least she had Joe to hang around with. Together, they rode the horses, groomed and cleaned tack, and then she showed him the progress—or lack of it—that she was making with Hope. He watched as the foal jumped around her in the school, barging her, ignoring the stick, butting Ellie in the back and almost making her fall over.