Shadow Walker (13 page)

Dawn rose abruptly and went to the window. She’d spent five years in this isolated cabin, without friends or human contact except Billy and his men. She’d grown to hate this place and what it represented. She looked forward to leaving, but she was not planning to go to any destination Cole had in mind. Their moment of shared bliss had been incredible, but she was astute enough to realize that Cole had bedded her because she was available. He cared about her future because basically he was a good person. His love was reserved for his dead wife.

It wasn’t as if she loved Cole, she told herself. She hardly knew him. He had taught her passion and she was grateful, but she wasn’t sure she’d ever trust a man with her life.

She did wish, however, that after they parted he’d not forget her easily. Cole would be haunting her memories the rest of her life. It seemed only right that he should remember her at least for the space of a single week.

“Dawn, are you listening? Don’t you want to know what I’ve decided?”

Dawn turned from the window to stare at Cole. “Go ahead and have your say. Not that it will matter one way or the other. What I do after you leave
is entirely my decision.” She returned her gaze to the scene outside the window.

Suddenly Dawn was aware of Cole standing behind her, so close she could feel his warmth seeping into her. She wanted to lean back against him, to hear him say she was going to be all right, to feel safe and protected. Instead she stood rigid, shoulders squared, chin high. She refused to accept his pity. Not even when he placed his hands on her shoulders and turned her to face him did she give him the satisfaction of knowing that his nearness affected her in ways that disturbed her. Once Cole left, her life would never be the same.

“I’m leaving tomorrow, Dawn, and you’re coming with me.”

“What! That … that’s ridiculous.”

“No, it makes good sense. I’m taking you where you’ll be safe. Where I won’t have to worry about you once I return to my job.”

Now Dawn was really confused. It sounded as if Cole intended to drop her off somewhere like unwanted baggage. “I don’t want to go to Oregon.”

“I’m not talking about Oregon.”

Dawn hadn’t really expected that Cole would take her to his sister, but she couldn’t conceive of another place he could take her where she’d be safe. “I don’t like this game, Cole. This is my life you’re talking about. Speak your piece, then leave like you planned.”

He led her over to the bed and sat her down. Then he began pacing back and forth in front of her. “I think I’ve mentioned that I was married once to a woman named Morning Mist. She was beautiful, sweet, kind … well, never mind, that’s
not important. Morning Mist was killed in a raid upon her village while I was away. When I returned and learned her fate, I couldn’t bring myself to return to the White world.

“Running Elk, Morning Mist’s brother, asked me to stay with his people. I spent four years with the Sioux, learning to live with my grief. They taught me skills that I would never have learned otherwise. I left when Running Elk decided to move his people to the reservation.”

Dawn was moved by Cole’s story but couldn’t see how it affected her. “What is the point in all this?”

“As I’ve said before, you’re too innocent, too vulnerable to be left on your own.”

Dawn bristled indignantly. “I’m not helpless. I can hunt, fish, plant a garden and glean edible food from the forest. I don’t need a man.”

Cole ignored her protest and continued his explanation. “Running Elk is a good man. He’s like a brother to me. You will fit in with his people and in time learn to adjust to a new way of life. Running Elk will treat you well and find a good husband for you.”

The color drained from Dawn’s face. “I know nothing about Indians, their culture, or the lives they lead. How can you expect me to fit in with people who are foreign to me? Besides, I don’t want a husband.”

“You said you speak the Sioux tongue.”

“Not fluently. My mother taught me what little I know. I don’t want to live with Indians. You can’t make me do something I don’t want to do.”

Cole stopped pacing and sat down beside Dawn. “I’ve thought long and hard about this. It’s the only solution. I believe you’ll feel more secure with Indians than with Whites. Half-breeds are despised by White society. I can’t bear the thought of you being abused and tormented by society because of the color of your skin. You’re coming with me and that’s final. Pack up your belongings, we’ll go into town later today and buy tickets on the first train to Cheyenne. From there we will make our way by horseback to the Red Cloud Agency.”

“I can’t believe you’ve planned all this without my approval. I’m not going anywhere with you.” She started to rise, but he grasped her hands to prevent her from leaving.

“You have no choice. I’ve already accepted responsibility for you and I want a clear conscience where you’re concerned. If I hadn’t bedded you …”

“If you hadn’t bedded me you would have ridden out of here and promptly forgotten me,” Dawn supplied.

“Perhaps. But that’s a moot point now. What’s done is done. I’ll never marry again, I decided that a long time ago. There will be other women, but none who mean anything to me. I’m telling you this so you’ll know that I’m doing the best I can for you under the restrictions I’ve placed upon myself. What I’m saying, Dawn, is that I can’t marry you, and I want you to understand it’s not because of what or who you are but what and who I’ve become since Morning Mist’s death.”

“I have no desire to marry a man I hardly know.
I’ve tried marriage, it isn’t for me. Taking my virginity is not a valid reason for accepting responsibility for me. It could have happened at any time. I’m grateful it was you and not one of Billy’s men.”

Cole stared at her. At her sweet face, so like Morning Mist’s it took his breath away. Her long black hair, blue eyes and dusky golden skin seduced and enticed him. He didn’t usually take advantage of innocent woman, but just looking at Dawn made him ache to make love to her again. Her red lips were moist and lush and incredibly tantalizing. Despite her slimness, her breasts were full and firm. Her earthy beauty was rare and highly erotic.

“I wholeheartedly agree,” Cole said earnestly. “That fact makes my obligation even more pressing. It will work out, love, you’ll see.”

“Don’t call me that,” Dawn said, refusing to look at him. “I’ve never been anyone’s love in my life. I’m not as innocent as you think. Billy did … things to me that I can’t even talk about. After a while, when he realized he couldn’t perform with me no matter what he did, he resorted to beatings.”

“Forget Cobb,” Cole said angrily. “No man will ever hurt you like that again. I’m going to make sure of that. You’ll be fine with Running Elk. He will treat you like a sister and see that other men respect you.”

Dawn’s eyes grew misty. No one had ever cared about her enough to want her happiness. Yet something inside her resisted Cole’s plans. He had no right to organize her life for her.

“I’m sorry, Cole, I won’t go. I know what you’re doing. You’re salving your conscience where I’m concerned, but I don’t want you to feel guilty about what we did.”

“The hell I am!” Cole cried, leaping to his feet and jerking her up with him. “Conscience has nothing to do with my decision.” Those words were not exactly true, but Cole preferred not to admit that his guilt over bedding Cobb’s widow was enormous. But he wasn’t sorry it had happened. Hell, no! He’d enjoyed their mating, and was glad he’d been the one to initiate her to passion.

“Listen to me, Dawn,” he said more reasonably. “Just try it for a while. If you don’t fit in, or if you hate it, you can leave. I’ll tell Running Elk you’re free to leave whenever you wish. Just give it a chance.”

Cole wanted to say more, but Dawn’s nearness was having its usual effect upon his body. They were standing so close he could feel the tips of her breasts pressing against his chest. The thickness of their clothing did little to protect them from the scorching heat arcing between them. Taking an aggressive step forward, Cole pulled her further into his embrace. He stared at her hard, unblinking. Green eyes flashing. He wanted to kiss her so damn bad he ached.

Dawn went still, the line of her spine rigid. Did Cole think he could use sexual persuasion to bring her around to his way of thinking?

Then all thought fled as his mouth came down hard on hers. His kiss deepened. Her lips softened beneath his for a brief moment as she opened her
mouth and touched his tongue with hers. Then reality returned and she pulled away. In aching silence she watched him drop his arms and step back.

“Your method of persuasion won’t work,” Dawn said. Her breathlessness belied her words.

He searched her face; his intent gaze plumbed the very core of her soul, recognizing something she feared to admit. A reluctant smile turned up the corners of his mouth. “That kiss wasn’t meant as persuasion. I wanted to kiss you. Regardless of what you say, you’re going to accompany me to Running Elk’s village.”

“Cole, this is—”

“… The right thing to do. Pack your personal items. Cobb’s horse is a good one. He can serve as your mount. Does he have a name?”

“Billy called him Wally, don’t ask me why.”

“Wally and Warrior can travel with us on the same train. Old Betsy will find a happy home at the livery. Can you be ready in an hour? Perhaps we can get a train out of here yet today.”

Dawn glanced around the ramshackle cabin, seeing nothing she cared to take with her as a reminder of her former life. Except for the clothing Cole had bought her and a small memento from her mother, she had no personal effects. She could flee this place with no regrets if it wasn’t for the way Cole was bullying her into leaving. He’d made it perfectly clear he didn’t want her for himself, so why wouldn’t he just leave? He complicated her life and disordered her thoughts.

When Dawn stared at him mutinously, Cole said, “I mean it, Dawn. You have one hour to
gather your belongings.” Then he strode out the door without waiting for an answer.

One hour later Dawn and Cole rode away from the cabin. Dawn didn’t look back once. She was leaving behind no fond memories, nothing she’d miss or regret. But that didn’t mean she’d meekly follow Cole. She didn’t want to live with Indians. She might look like an Indian, but in her heart she didn’t feel like one. It was disheartening to realize that she belonged to no particular race or culture. She was a product of two cultures, despised by both Indians and Whites. Billy had been right when he’d said she was worthless to anyone.

“Try not to worry, Dawn. Trust me.”

Dawn trusted no man. Let Cole think what he wanted. She might get on the train with him, but that didn’t mean she’d get off with him. Somewhere between Dodge and Cheyenne lay open country. It would take little effort to escape Cole, and that was exactly what she intended to do.

They left the mule at the livery when they arrived in Dodge and continued on to the railroad station. The Union Pacific wasn’t due to arrive until noon the next day. Cole bought tickets and arranged for their horses to be transported with them on the same train.

“What do we do now?” Dawn wanted to know. She wasn’t accustomed to living in town, and people made her nervous.

“I’m going to check in with the sheriff and see if he’s had any luck finding Lewis and Pickens. Then I’m going to find out if Sandy has left town
yet. Why don’t you go to the Dodge House and get us a couple of rooms? I’ll meet you there later.”

Dawn jerked hard on the reins. Wally danced to a stop. Cole reined in beside her. “What’s wrong?”

“You want me to get rooms at the hotel?”

“That’s right. I won’t be long. When I return we’ll take supper at the hotel. If Sandy is still in town maybe he’ll join us.”

“Cole, I don’t think you realize …”

Her words were lost to the wind. Cole had already kneed his horse toward the sheriff’s office. Dawn watched him move away with trepidation. Didn’t he realize the position in which he had just placed her? Apparently he had forgotten who and what she was. Unwilling to succumb to her fears, Dawn turned Wally toward the Dodge House.

Cole’s thoughts had already turned in another direction. He was still worried about Pickens and Lewis. Had they heard yet that the train loot had been recovered? Were they still in the vicinity?

As luck would have it, Cole ran into Sandy outside of the sheriff’s office.

“Sheriff Tayler is not here,” Sandy said after greeting Cole.

“I’d hoped you hadn’t left yet,” Cole replied, angling Sandy back inside the sheriff’s office where they could talk. “Do you know if Tayler’s seen anything of Lewis or Pickens?”

“The deputy told me Tayler formed a posse early this morning. A rancher spotted them on his land just east of town.”

Cole grinned, somewhat relieved by the news.
“That’s welcome news. After you left, I worried that they might trail you to Wichita and ambush you along the way. They’re in desperate need of that money.”

“I already thought of that and took care of it. I sent the money to Wichita on this morning’s train. There’s an armed guard on board just in case. I’m leaving tomorrow morning. If I’m ambushed they won’t find a damn thing.”

“I have a much safer idea. Spread the word tomorrow that you’ve sent the money on ahead by train. By then it will be too late for them to do anything about it and there will be no reason to ambush you.”

Sandy laughed. “You always were smarter than me. What are your plans? Did you talk Cobb’s widow into going to your Indian friend’s village?”

“More or less,” Cole said, heaving a sigh that was full of misgivings. “We leave for Cheyenne at noon tomorrow.”

“Are you sure you’re doing the right thing? You really haven’t given this much thought.” He slapped Cole on the back. “Come on over to the Longbranch, I’ll buy you a drink. You look as if you could use one.”

“I reckon a stiff drink wouldn’t hurt me,” Cole admitted. “I sent Dawn over to the Dodge House to get a couple of rooms for us. Maybe I ought to check in on her first. I’ll meet you at the saloon in a few minutes.” They parted at the door, Sandy heading for the saloon while Cole made his way toward the Dodge House.