Steampunk Desires: An Erotic Romance (The Complete Collection) (9 page)

Sure enough, it was weighty. It was polished brass, and it looked like a small, heavy tube sock. It was roughly cylindrical with slight bulge in the middle and a rounded end. The opposite end was open, and it was hollow inside. The cord that dangled from it came from the side of it, right next to the opening. Eloise looked at it blankly. “Why do I need this?” she asked.

Edwin frowned. “Were you listening to anything I said, or were you staring at the raven-haired boy?” he asked knowingly.

“I–er, I was–” Eloise stammered.

“His name is Alonso, and if you like, I’ll introduce you,” Edwin said, grinning to himself while maintaining an inscrutable façade. This would be rich.

“Why, yes, I should like very much to be introduced,” Eloise said, ravaging Alonso with her eyes.

“Alonso’s busy at the moment, as you can see,” Edwin said. “While we wait for him to finish, how about paying attention, since if you do this wrong, you won’t get paid. Hmm?”

Eloise sighed, “Yes, fine.”

“Good. Now, then. Placement of your brass sock is important. If you are by yourself, it goes deep inside of you. If you’re with another woman, it goes inside of that person. That person will have his or her own. If you are with somebody and taking it in the rear, -”

“I never do that,” Eloise said hotly.

Edwin continued, nonplussed, “If for some reason you should find yourself wanting to try something else, –”

“I
never
let anyone near there,” Eloise repeated.

Edwin shrugged. “Never say never. Regardless, the one who takes it anally still puts his or her plug deep inside.”

“Fine,” Eloise snorted.

“Always remember to plug it in. Either of the plugs on the floor next to the bed will work.”

Eloise nodded, her temper cooling.

“So, remember: sign in, plug in.”

“Sign in, plug in. Got it.”

“Then have a good time. Above all else, remember: cleanliness is next to godliness. Always bathe yourself after fornicating. If you’re going to do anal,” Edwin said, dismissing Eloise’s attempt at protest with a wave of his hand and a closed-eye nod, “be sure to clean yourself up beforehand, and clean your brass sock, too.”

Eloise nodded, then glanced over at Alonso, who was lying on the bed with the thin blonde, the two of them basking in afterglow. “Looks like they’re done,” Eloise said pointedly. Edwin glanced up.

“So they are,” he said, “but they’re resting and enjoying each other’s company. We don’t need to interrupt that.” Eloise huffed. “How about you take care of these six beds here, and when you’re finished, come get me across the hall. That should give them plenty of time to rest up and part ways.”

Eloise sighed, “Fine,” and began gathering the sheets off the bed they’d been sitting on as Edwin left for his stateroom.

As soon as Edwin was gone, Eloise dropped the stripped sheets on the bed and made a beeline for Alonso. “Hey,” she said, flashing a smile.

Alonso looked up from around the blonde’s arms and said shyly, “Hey.”

So far so good. “How’d you like to ditch this girl and let a real woman show you how it’s done?” Eloise asked boldly. The blonde girl gave him a quizzical look.

Alonso said nothing for a while, forming his words, and then he softy said with a mild Spanish accent, “I suppose you think yourself a real treasure in the sack, but with an attitude like that, I think you’re more of a horny dog than a sexual goddess.”

Eloise’s jaw dropped. Was this guy serious?

Alonso continued, “Mary is a wonderful woman who thinks more of me than she does of herself.” The blonde smiled affectionately. “She is gentle when needed and passionate when desired. What can you claim, ‘real woman,’ who interrupts our conversation, insults my partner, and addresses me as if sex is my only reason for living?”

Eloise gaped. He was serious.

Alonso’s voice chilled. “Cat got your tongue, ‘real woman?’ Such a shame. I have a proposition for you: how’d you like to go make beds, like Edwin told you, and leave us alone, like Edwin told you?”

Eloise moved her lips to say something, but nothing came out.

“Oh,” Alonso added, “and you may tell Edwin that there’s no need to introduce us; we’ve met. Run along now, ‘real woman,’ and do ‘real woman’ chores.”

Mary snorted, tears coming to her eyes as she fought back a roar of laughter. For someone so small and innocent-looking, Alonso was not helpless. Snickers came from around the room from others who had stopped to watch, knowing this would happen.

Eloise, her head clouded with an acute sense of humiliation, walked stiffly back to the bed she’d just stripped, picked up the pile of soiled bedding, and put it down the chute. This humiliation was worse even than when Edwin had sent her sprawling. Who did that guy think he was, calling Eloise a horny dog? Was he so stupid that he saw more in that bimbo Mary? She wasn’t even halfway attractive! Eloise contented herself thinking that maybe Alonso was just stupid, an ill-informed Spaniard who didn’t know anything about being attractive. Poor thing, Eloise thought. It must be terrible to live with such ignorance.

Still, the others’ reaction had unnerved her. Were all of the men on this ship that stupid? Not that their being stupid bothered her; although she hadn’t attended Oxford or Harvard or Yale as her parents had offered, she considered herself well-educated, and sometimes sleeping with those inferior to her was something she had to do as a public service. But if they were going to snicker at her, she was not going to afford them the privilege! She’d have to find someone that wasn’t here to see it, someone more deserving of her time. The others eventually left as she continued to work on the beds. She finished hurriedly, and then went to see Edwin.

Edwin was sitting at an oaken roll top desk when Eloise entered, poring over some papers. He looked up.

“Ah, Eloise,” he said, “Did you get the beds made?”

“Yeah,” Eloise said flatly.

“Excellent. Let’s go have a look,” Edwin said, putting the papers down on his desk and going across the hall. He examined the beds closely, and then turned to Eloise.

“Eloise, you know better than this,” he said, puzzled. “Look, it’s got wrinkles all in it, the side’s not even tucked in on that one, and the excess on the pillowcase isn’t turned under. You did well this afternoon; what’s happened?”

Eloise huffed. She didn’t want to admit to the encounter from earlier. “Nothing, sir,” she said.

Edwin frowned and shook his head. “Don’t give me the impression I can’t leave you alone,” he warned. “Now remake the beds, and do it properly this time. I’m not going to introduce you to Alonso until you do.” Eloise said nothing as Edwin left.

Eloise sighed bitterly. She was alone in the room. This had all been such a stupid idea! It had now been — how long — eighteen hours since she’d last had her way with someone? More? She wanted to go home. She was stuck on this blimp, surrounded by idiots. Idiots in first class that couldn’t see that she deserved her own room, boarding pass or not. The idiot masseur that couldn’t see that her womanly, wet flower deserved the same treatment of the rest of her body. The idiot manager that had brought her down here. The idiot Edwin that had her doing this inane work, and the worst of all, that idiot of idiots, Alonso. It made her so mad! In anger, she threw the sheets off the nearest bed, then the next, then the next, sending up a flurry of sheets, pillows, and pillowcases, shouting in frustration.

The door flew open, and Edwin rushed in to see what the racket was. Sheets were strewn everywhere. Some of the mattresses had come off the frames. Some of the contributor logs and inkwells had fallen on the floor, rendering the pages illegible. Ink stained some of the linens. Eloise stood in the middle of it all. Alonso had been right: she looked like a dog that had just gotten into the garbage.

Edwin stared. He had a minimum energy quota he had to maintain, a minimum number of people fornicating at any given time, and that wasn’t some arbitrary number set to make some executive look good; it was a minimum needed to keep the ship in the air. He counted the beds that were still intact. Just over a hundred of the beds had not suffered Eloise’s wrath. He performed some calculations in his head. It was enough, but he would have to get the beds remade promptly. There was likely nothing to be done about the ruined contributor logs, other than to start asking people who was where and at what time. Fortunately, his crew was honest, with very few exceptions. He’d be able to trust them, especially once he’d crosschecked, and hopefully he could piece everything back together. It was easily several days’ worth of work to get everything worked out. He scanned over the mess. Eloise stood, her chest heaving, in the middle of the mess she’d made, incapable of comprehending the magnitude of the work that would be needed to undo it. Edwin was furious, but he had to keep a clear head. He needed Eloise out of the way.

“Come with me,” he said to Eloise brusquely, grabbing her by the shoulder and escorting her forcefully to Eloise’s cabin. “Stay here,” he said bluntly, locking the door from the outside. Let the pest soil herself, he thought angrily. He took a breath and let it out forcefully. Step one, containing the problem, was achieved. Now to get some help. He went to the common room, seeking out several of his better crewmen. He led them to the collection room, where several of the other crewmen had stumbled upon the mess and were staring at it, dumbfounded.

“New recruit needs a lot of training,” Edwin said tersely by way of explanation to the crewmen he’d brought and the ones already there. “I’ve got her contained for now. We need to get this place cleaned up. I need all of the soiled sheets thrown away. Blot the logbooks dry; we can’t afford to have any other damage come to them, then bring them to my cabin. We’ve got to start piecing the missing information back together before Sunday. You three, start remaking the beds. Yes, I know it’s not your job, but I need everybody to pitch in or this ship will go down. Thank you so much.”

The crew scurried to do as instructed. As others found out about the debacle, they rushed to join in helping. They were all good men and women, and Edwin was genuinely appreciative of their willingness to step up. Good subordinates were very hard to find, and he was blessed to have a whole deck of them.

The next two days were very tense for Eloise. Anywhere she went, Edwin escorted her. Anytime Edwin was not with her, she was confined to her cabin. It was boring. There was positively nothing to do. She had no books, no newspapers. Edwin did not permit her to take anything with her from the common area. She ate there, was forbidden to drink alcohol, did her business (Edwin did not, as he’d threatened, make Eloise soil herself), and went back to her cabin, where she laid in bed, sat on her bed, thought about how bored she was on her bed, or slept. She did manage to masturbate. In hindsight, Edwin wished there had been a way to harvest the energy from all the masturbation; when the cleaning crew came in, her sheets from head to foot were crunchy from discharged fluids. Eloise might be a terrible human being, but she’d be excellent as a generator, Edwin mused. He wasn’t entirely convinced that Eloise was terrible as a human being, either. Her behavior had been terrible, there was no question of that. But given her age and her upbringing, Edwin conceded that it was possible that she simply didn’t know any better. Whether she was terrible or not, Eloise’s incarceration had left Edwin short a hand, which put increased burden on the rest of the crew, and he needed everyone to carry his own weight.

Finally, on the third day, Edwin brought Eloise into his stateroom and closed the door behind them.

“I hope your stay has been to your liking,” he said coldly once Eloise was seated. Eloise opened her mouth to retort. “Shut up,” Edwin said harshly. “You have set the crew back by three days, and you’ve set me personally back in keeping the books by five days. The pittance two days you spent out of everybody’s way was a small price to pay.” Eloise said nothing.

“I have good news, though,” Edwin continued grimly. “I’ve found a way for you to make yourself useful.” Eloise gulped. “The cleaning crew showed me your sheets,” Edwin continued, “and I have to say I’m impressed. I have never seen such a thorough coating of sheets by anybody. Frankly, the ship needs the extra power from where you set us behind.” He gave Eloise a hard look as he delivered his decision. “You’re going to have a permanent spot in the collection room,” he said. Eloise’s face brightened. “Don’t get excited,” Edwin said curtly. “You’re not there to screw anybody. From the time you get up until the time you go to sleep, you’ll be masturbating. There will be breaks for light meals and for you to relieve yourself. That is all.” Then, in a loud voice, he barked, “Come in!” The door opened.