The Broken (20 page)

Love Blay

The agony
inside me is unbearable. I couldn’t save him, just like, deep down,
he never really saved me. I went from a victim of one predator to
the victim of another. Danny stole my innocence. He stole what
could have been with Sammy. I won’t let him take anything else. He
does love me in his sick, fucked up way, and if I died it would
hurt him. It would end this.

I stand and go
to the boot of my car. I pull the gas can with extra gas in case of
emergencies and carry it through the back yard. I pour it in a
circle around the wooden platform, then throw the empty can down
and go back inside. I pocket Blay's lighter and bend down next to
him. I drag him from his bedroom, falling on my ass a couple of
times in the process. He weighs a ton and his blood is leaving a
trail, making me heave and sob as I drag him through the kitchen
into the back yard. I place him in the centre of the circle and
pause to catch my breath. Dusk has cast a dark shadow over
everything, the sun offering its last soft orange glow in the
horizon. I take my phone from my pocket to ring Sammy’s cell, and
I’m relieved when his answer phone kicks in:

“It’s Sammy,
you know what to do!”

“Hey Sammy,
it’s me, River. I know you’re hurting right now and I’m so sorry
for that. I want you to know I love you. I’ve always loved you,
ever since I watched you break down through the hole in the fence
on the first day you moved here. You fit in, Sammy. You matched me.
I was broken, too. I watched my dad beat my brother while my mom
did nothing to protect him. Blay was my hero. He saved me so many
times from the hands of our dad. On my sixteenth birthday, Blay
killed him to protect me. Our dad had become more touchy-feely the
older I got. He was a sick man, Sammy. He was obsessed with me. My
mom saw it and killed herself instead of taking me and Blaydon away
from him. Danny walked in on us the night of my sixteenth and
helped Blaydon bury him in the garden.” A small laugh rips from my
chest.
“
Blaydon built me the platform so I could dance on
his grave. The thing is, Blay did stop our dad from coming to my
room that night but he didn’t know how to stop Danny coming in his
place. He stole my innocence that night while I cried and thought
of you. He told me I belonged to him. I would have done anything to
protect Blaydon. I wish someone had saved us both. I wished you
would come for me but you left, and I died inside. You own my soul,
Sammy, but Danny will never let me breathe so I’m following my
brother to find peace. Peace we couldn’t find here in the darkness
of our past. I love you always.”

I end the call
and tap out a message to Derek.

Our father’s
in a grave in my back yard. Maria was an accident. Danny dumped her
body. Arrest him and make him pay. For what you find here, I’m
sorry, Derek.

My phone begins
to chirp but I ignore it. I cradle my brother and slip the lighter
from my pocket.

“What are you
doing?”

My breath
stutters. I didn’t see Jasper approach.

“Oh my God.
River, is he dead?”

I hold up my
hand. “Stay back, Jasper.”

That’s when I
see Danny come through the back door. He fists his hand and ploughs
it straight into Jasper’s face, knocking him to the ground.

“Jasper!”

“That stupid
fuck. I can’t believe he killed himself.” Danny laughs with malice,
looking at Blaydon. “Drop him and come here, River. Now.”

I shake my
head. “He couldn’t live with what he did!”

Danny laughs
again. “He was a stupid fuck. He didn’t even kill anybody.”

What is he
talking about? He killed our father. My mind battles; memories from
that night engulf me.

I hear muffled
moans and a low thump, thump, thump. My heart rate spikes and my
eyes fly open. I pull back the covers and tiptoe to my bedroom
door. I push the side of my face flat against the cold wood,
straining to hear. THUMP! My door rattles, vibrating against my
head, pushing me back.

“
No, no,
please don’t!” I hear Blay cry. The door handle pushes down. The
shadow of my father creeps across my bedroom carpet with the light
from the hall way, highlighting him like the boogie man in
nightmares. I step back, shaking; my eyes find a broken and
battered Blaydon lying on the floor, and a small sob cracks from my
chest.

“
Blay.”

My dad’s angry
gaze turns to him so quickly he almost seems inhuman. “You fucking
stay out there!” he warns, and my eyes go wide as he steps into my
room and closes the door. He walks towards me. “Come lay down with
Daddy, my beautiful girl.”

He lifts an
empty bottle of whiskey to his lips and shakes it. “Huh,” he huffs.
“Go get Daddy another bottle, beautiful. Then I want to hold you
for a while, and show you how much Daddy loves you.” He walks
closer and strokes a hand down my face. “You look like your Mama
when I first met her. So beautiful.”

I reach for
the empty bottle and slowly walk from the room, shaking with every
step. I walk down the hall into the kitchen.

“
Blay,” I
say to his back. He’s standing, frozen. I step around him and gasp
at the carving knife he’s holding. I put the empty bottle down on
the table and slip my hand into his, taking the knife from
him.

“
I won’t let
him do it, River. I’ve kept him from your room all these years. I
won’t let him I won’t let him, I won’t let him.”

I reach to cup
his face. “I know, Blay. Thank you,” I whisper, bringing his head
down to cradle him.

“
You little
cunt! Go to your room!” our father shouts, grabbing the back of
Blaydon’s shirt and yanking him from me. He kicks him down the hall
then turns back to me, closing the distance in a few short strides.
His hand comes crashing down across my face, my head whips to the
side from the impact and I stumble a few paces.

“
He’s the
reason your mama killed herself and yet you still give him all your
affection.”

He reaches for
me and crushes me to him, his grip tight.

A loud crack
rings out into the quiet of the night, and Dad’s grip loosens. He
falls to the floor. Dark liquid oozes from underneath his head,
forming a puddle, his sin-filled blood leaking in a red river of
Karma. I tear my eyes from the still form of our father to see Blay
standing there, holding the empty whisky bottle. “Oh my God. I
killed him.”

The knuckle
rap on the back door makes us both jump.

“
I called
Danny earlier,” Blay whispers, his eyes widening as the door handle
dips and Danny steps into the kitchen.

“
Hey, you
ready?” he spoke casually, then his eyes take in the scene in front
of him and he runs a hand through his hair. “Oh shit. What the fuck
happened?”

Blay begins to
cough, wincing, and red fluid spatters from his mouth onto his
hand.

“
Blay, shit,
man,” Danny says, going to him.

“
My ribs
again. Fuck, I killed him Dan.”

Danny looks to
the still form on the floor, a sneer turning his handsome face into
a scary grimace.

“
He was
protecting me,” I mutter. Danny strides to me and tips my face to
the side; my cheek is on fire from where my dad had hit me.

“
He fucking
hit you.” His tone is deadly.

“
Yeah,” I
whisper, a small sob escaping my parted lips.

“
Take your
brother to the bathroom, wrap his ribs. I’ll figure out what to do,
come up with a story.”

“
Is he
dead?” Blay’s panicking biting his nails and shaking his
head.

“
Take your
brother, River.”

I rush to
Blaydon and force him down the hall into the bathroom. In his room
I lift his shirt and flinch. His stomach is black and blue with
bruises. I run my hands over old scars. “I’m so sorry, Blaydon.”
Tears fall from my eyes.

“
Hey, don’t,
Riv.”

I shake my
head. “No, Blay! Half of these scars and bruises are from you
protecting me.”

He lowers his
head to look into my eyes. “River you’re my baby sister. You’re the
only person who has ever loved me, and I’ll always protect you. I
love you sister of mine.”

I grab the
bandages from the drawer and wrap his ribs in silence.

“
Why are you
holding shovels?” My voice breaks because I know the
answer.

“
He’s dead,
so we bury him or Blay goes to prison for life.” Danny places the
shovels on the kitchen table and comes over to me, cupping my face.
“Do you want that?”

I shake my
head, furiously. “No! No, I can’t lose him no, no, no!”

Danny pulls me
against his chest. “Shh, it’s okay, Riv. I’ll help him for you.” He
pulls back and stares into my eyes. “For you, okay?”

A sob breaks
free. “Thank you, Danny,” I whisper.

“
Go to your
room, River. I’ll take care of this.”

I step around
Blaydon and run to my room, closing the door and collapsing into my
bed.

“He was
bleeding. There was so much blood,” I murmur.

Danny scoffs.
“Head injuries bleed a lot, he had a strong pulse.”

I cradle Blay’s
limp, cold body into my chest. “Did you bury him alive?”

He rolls his
eyes. “No, when you went to wrap Blay’s ribs, I smothered him.
Thing with intoxication, Riv, it can leave you defenceless, ask
Maria. Oh wait, you can’t.”

My breath
hitches. “Did you kill her too, Danny?”

“She wasn’t
worth the fucking air she was breathing. Do you know she dropped
her panties to try and get me to fuck her?” He sneers. “She was a
disgusting whore who spoke trash about you, and she used your
brother and tried to fuck your man.”

A tear escapes
to my cheek. “You’re not my man, Danny. You’re a murderer.”

“Tsk tsk, tsk.
Be careful, River. I heard you with Blaydon, talking about me not
being able to hold your father’s death over you, so I decided to
give you another incentive. Playing Blay was easy. He was always so
out of his face on sleeping pills, he didn’t even feel me smother
his girlfriend while she thrashed next to him.” He raises his leg
and swings it forward into Jasper’s stomach. “I’ll always be your
man. You think I’ll ever let you go, or let some pretty boy take
you from me? I’ll fucking kill him. I’ll kill him, River! You
belong to me!” He bellows, and I vibrate with fear.

“I have nothing
now, Danny. Blaydon was the only reason I was with you and he’s
gone.”

He paces,
pulling tufts of his hair he reaches into the back of his jeans
pulling a gun and tapping the end of a gun to his head. Oh God, he
has a gun. “What about him? I’ll let him go if you come with me.”
He points the gun at Jasper.

I shake my
head. “I don’t care about him, Danny,” I bluff, hoping I sound
confident.

He grins and
points the gun at Jasper. “You sure about that?”

I flip the
lighter open. I raise it up and a gunshot rings out; a high pitched
noise pierces my ears. It’s my scream.

“It’s a stomach
wound, you have time to get him help, River.”

I flip the
lighter down and the flame sparks. I throw the lighter, engulfing a
circle of flames around me and Blaydon on the raised platform.

“River!
River!”

I hear Sammy’s
voice bleed through my sobs. I watch in horror as he rushes through
the gate, and runs up the steps. He stills as Danny points the gun
at his face.

“Sorry you had
to see this, bro,” Danny tells him. Sammy’s eyes fall to Jasper, he
blanches then turns to me, and then Blaydon.

“River,” his
voice is small and choked with agony.

“Sammy, you
weren’t meant to be back until tomorrow!”

I can’t compose
myself. My heart and head are broken. Blaydon lays dead in my arms,
Jasper beaten and shot, and Danny holds a gun at the only man I’ve
ever loved.

“Danny, don’t
hurt her. Please let me get to her.”

My heart sinks
further at Sammy’s words. I know Danny won’t take that well and the
cracking sound that follows proves me right. Sammy’s grunting, and
then his knees hit the floor, making me panic.

“No, Danny!
Please! I’ll go with you.”

His face
contorts into pure hatred, and he hits himself in the head with the
handle of the gun. “It’s fucking Sammy, isn’t it? I should have
known you always had a thing for him, but I thought this pretty boy
turned your head!”

“Danny, no! No,
please I’ll be with you. I love you!”

He looks at me
through the growing flames. “Move away from the fire, River, or
you’ll kill more than just yourself.”

I look at
Sammy. “Promise me you won’t hurt them anymore,” I beg.

He sneers.
“Fine, if you won’t come to me.” He raises the gun and shoots
Sammy.

“No!” I drop
Blaydon; the fire is becoming too intense. I feel the heat all over
my body; it’s a hot, deadly wall keeping me from getting to Sammy.
I feel like I moved outside my own life, I’m a spectator on the
side lines watching in. my mind trying to refuses any more trauma.
If someone could die from heartache the bullet fired at Sammy would
have made me ash floating away on the wind. Danny disappears, and
then reappears with Blaydon’s mattress. He throws it down in front
of me, quashing the flames. He grabs me and drags me away from the
fire and through the house.

“Did you pack a
bag?”

“No!” I shriek,
trying to get free from his hold. He raises the gun, bringing it
down heavily against my head, submerging me in darkness.