The Stranger She Married (39 page)

"I would appreciate some predictable joy."

"Nicholas. Cole. I should have seen that. At least you don't have to decide where your loyalties lie. You clearly loved them both."

She rubbed her eyes. “I did. And I suffered for it."

"Are you angry at him for lying to you?"

"Yes!” With her eyes fixed upon Cole's motionless form, she heaved a mighty sigh, releasing the last of her frustration, and shook her head. “Not any more. But I look forward to needling him about it for years to come."

But could she trust him?

After checking on Hannah, who was eating and looking noticeably better, she returned to Cole. He remained unconscious all evening, but his fever came down. She lay next to him, trying to offer him comfort with the warmth of her body, and finally fell into an exhausted slumber.

She awoke slowly, aware first that a large, masculine arm was wrapped around her, pulling her in closer. Then she realized that the rhythm of Cole's breathing had changed. His eyes were open and focused.

Her relief left her weak.

"Good morning.” She touched his forehead. The fever had left him.

A tiny smile appeared in the corner of his mouth.

"How do you feel?"

He moistened his lips. “Like a man who wishes he had a whole body."

"To love your wife?"

The smile faded. He closed his eyes. “Do you hate me?"

She caressed his face. “I was hurt. Angry. But no, I do not hate you.” Putting a light-hearted tone in her voice, she added. “It's fortunate you were unconscious or I might have done you bodily harm."

He did not smile. “I married you because I wanted you for my wife. I hated deceiving you.” He coughed, and then winced. “You know my secret, now. And still you stayed with me,” he said in wonder.

"Of course I did. I'm your wife."

"Is Hawthorne dead?"

"Yes. But, he made a full confession.” Alicia related all she had learned about Hawthorne and his mother while Cole listened without expression.

Cole touched her face. “I nearly died when I thought he had hurt you."

"You were there to protect me just as you have been since we met."

A haunted expression flitted over his face. “I tried to do the right thing for you, Alicia, but I don't know if I have."

She tried to bring levity into her voice. “Of course you have. And now I no longer have to be torn between loving Nicholas, my gentle, thoughtful husband, or Cole, the reprehensible scoundrel who could always make me laugh."

Despite her effort to coax a smile from him, he remained grave. “I couldn't stand the thought of you wed to another man, especially someone like that boorish colonel. But you refused when I asked you to marry me. I just didn't know what else to do."

She swallowed, but her throat was still so battered and bruised that it caused pain. “Did you ever mock me behind my back?"

He blinked. “Mock you? Of course not, why would I?"

"Because I was afraid of you in that mask as the baron, but I was tempted by you as Cole."

"I hated deceiving you. But I couldn't tell you until I was sure you no longer hated me."

She sighed. “I was so stubborn."

"You are wonderful, and beautiful, and I'm fortunate, indeed, you are even speaking to me."

"You and Jared must have shared a laugh over me seeing you together,” she groused, still feeling petulant.

"Jared was enchanted. He threatened to steal you away if I don't treat you well. And truly, Alicia, I never laughed at you."

"And if I'd asked for an annulment?"

He stared straight ahead and let his breath out slowly. “I don't know. Since I married you in such a deceitful way—wearing a mask, and pretending to be another—the marriage could have been declared invalid. It still wouldn't have been a clean process, but it could have been done. If you'd wanted it badly enough. But even if I had, I would have pursued you as Cole until you agreed to marry me. Again. I could never truly let you go."

"Then our marriage is legal?” she asked.

"Yes. I stood next to you in front of vicar, used my full name, and spoke my vows, as did you. It is legal, unless you decide to contest it.” He watched her.

"I have no intentions of contesting it, Cole."

As if a terrible burden had been lifted, he drew a deep breath. With his eyes closed, he raised her hand to his lips, kissed it and held it against his cheek. He was silent for so long, she thought he had fallen asleep again. “I hope you will love me someday. As I love you."

She touched his face. “I already do."

His hand tightened on hers. How she loved this man! If only she could truly trust him.

"But I fear it,” she whispered.

"Fear what?"

"Loving you. Wondering how soon you'll break my heart. Whose bed you will be in."

He opened his eyes and in the depths of the blue hurt mingled with astonishment. “Alicia, I haven't gone near another woman in months. Not since before I married you."

"Why?"

He looked her in the eyes, and, despite his weakened state, spoke with emotion. “Because, for one thing, I spoke truthfully when I said I don't fully deserve my reputation. Remember the harpies? But more importantly, I have no desire to go near another woman. I want only you. And I want to be worthy of you. I love you. And I will be faithful to you all of my days. I vow it.” His eyes pled for understanding.

She remembered the words
Maman
had recorded in her journal about forgiving her husband's past. They gave her the courage to believe Cole now. Her heart assured her he spoke sincerely. Tears formed in her eyes, and the swelling in her heart left no room for doubt.

With a gentle hand, he caressed her face and then he kissed her, tenderly, hungrily.

Mindful of his injury, Alicia snuggled against him and held him until he went back to sleep; a healthy sleep, undisturbed by fever or delirium.

She kissed his brow and tightened her arms around him. She had hoped her husband would one day show her his face when he trusted her, but she never dreamed that it would reveal the other man she loved. Her beloved husband. Cole.

Marveling at the contentment that soaked through her, she held on to Cole—Nicholas—and thanked her Maker for the gift of him, and the healing he brought to her wounded heart. And the fulfillment of her dreams.

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"So it appears I'll be landlocked for the next few months,” Jared said with obvious reluctance.

Alicia walked beside Cole, her fingers twined in his, as they skirted the lake in the Amesbury family estate. Alicia looked up at Jared striding next to her husband, looking more like Cole's twin than his younger brother by fourteen months. Jared pulled at his cravat as if unaccustomed to it.

"Isn't that rather dangerous for you to walk about openly in England?” Alicia asked.

Jared's penetrating gaze swept over her. He and Cole shared the ability to make one think keeping one's thoughts private would be impossible. “Yes, but on land, I'm simply Jared Amesbury, second son of the fifth Earl Tarrington. I never use my real name when I'm at sea. I hated to besmirch the family name while I played pirate.” He quirked a self-depreciating grin and looked so much like Cole that Alicia blinked.

Cole snorted. “Could've done better than a stupid name like Black Jack."

"It was all I could come up with in a pinch,” Jared said easily with a shrug.

"So no more donning a Nicholas disguise when you come on land?” she teased with a smile.

A glint that exceeded Cole's in wickedness glimmered in his eye. “Too bad we couldn't play the part beyond a brotherly embrace."

Alicia put her hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh at his brazen suggestion.

Cole punched him in the arm. “Watch it,
little
brother, I can still thrash you,” he growled, but an affectionate light shone in his face.

Jared grinned in reply. “To answer your question, Sister-in-law, I will wear the disguise whenever I go into London, at least for a while, but in the small town where I've let the house for the summer, no one should know my face. Besides, I've cut my hair, shaved my beard, and with these ridiculously uncomfortable clothes—” he gestured to his finely tailored suit “—I doubt any former foes, or victims, would recognize me as Black Jack. My first mate hardly knows me now.” He pulled again at his cravat until it became quite rumpled.

The first flowers of spring dotted the lawn by the lake. After Cole had sufficiently healed, they had settled a whole and well Hannah in a reputable school for girls where she blissfully made new friends. After seeing to it that repairs on Robert's manor house were underway, they returned home and enjoyed a magical Christmas together. Then she and Cole had spent the rest of the winter and spring in the happiest months of Alicia's life.

This morning, Jared had come for a visit on his way to a country house he would use for the summer. Alicia drew a deep breath, perfectly happy, perfectly at peace. She looked up at her husband, gratified to see him fully recovered. Every time she thought of how close she had come to losing him, she could barely hold back the tears. She squeezed his hand. He released her hand so he could put an arm around her.

Jared shot them a look of reproach. “Perhaps I should leave you two alone?"

"Would you mind?” Cole grinned wolfishly and Alicia blushed.

"When the staff gets the house prepared, I'd love to have you both visit,” Jared said. “That is, if you can refrain from indulging in these sickening displays of affection."

Alicia smiled. How easily she smiled these days! A light heart did that to a person. “We would be happy to visit. That is, if the doctor approves."

She touched her stomach and felt the hint of roundness that had recently begun to develop there. Cole placed his hand on her abdomen, infusing her with warmth, and looked at her with such tenderness that tears pricked her eyes.

Self-consciously, she glanced at Jared and then blinked at the unexpected wistfulness in his expression as he watched them share such an intimate moment.

Jared looked away and cleared his throat, tugging at his poor, abused cravat again. Then he brought a careless tone to his voice. “I can't picture you as a father, Cole. That seems to defy reason."

Cole chuckled. “I agree. Alicia deserves your pity for her having me as the father of her children."

"You deserve my pity just for being stuck with this lout,” he whispered to Alicia. “Do you wish to escape? With me? The house I've let is quite fine. You even have the correct name, so no one will ever be the wiser."

"It might be hard for her to ignore the knife sticking out of your heart, you blackguard,” Cole warned.

Alicia glanced at her husband. She sighed blissfully. Her husband. Cole. “I can see your atrocious manners must be a family failing, Husband. He's as incorrigible as you were."

"I, at least, was trying to steal my own wife, not my brother's."

"But you led me to believe that you were trying to steal your cousin's wife,” she reminded him.

"See? He's a cad,” Jared interjected. “You deserve someone better. Someone honest."

Alicia raised her brows. “A pirate is more honest?"

He puffed out his chest. “I'm an honest pirate."

Cole choked and Alicia patted him in consolation. “Poor dear. With this family, it's a wonder you've turned out as well as you have."

Cole and Jared exchanged a look. “She hasn't met Christian, yet,” they said simultaneously, then burst out into laughter.

Cole shook his head. “Not until she's firmly in love with me. It will be several more years before I risk that encounter."

"Why?” Alicia wanted to know. “From everything you've told me about him, he's perfectly respectable."

"Not merely perfectly respectable.
Perfect
,” Cole replied mournfully.

"The perfectly perfect Christian,” Jared added in a sing-song voice as if they'd said that phrase repeatedly, and probably at poor Christian's expense.

"The youngest. Mother's favorite,” Cole explained. “He always does and says everything exactly as he ought. If he wasn't so humble and likeable, I'd hate him."

"I plotted to kill him once,” Jared offered cheerfully.

Alicia gasped. “You didn't!"

Jared blinked as if surprised she'd oppose such a thing. “I didn't carry out my plan. Mother found out.” He let out a slow breath as if he'd been the one who nearly lost his life.

"Oh, dear, what have I gotten myself into?” Alicia fanned herself dramatically.

Cole swept her into his arms and kissed her soundly. “A lifetime of happiness, my dear."

"It certainly won't be dull,” she agreed.

Rudely ignoring Jared, Cole kissed Alicia again. This time his lips lingered. She sighed and leaned against him, counting herself fortunate indeed, and vowed again to love him for all eternity. Then, immersed in his scent, his warmth, his kiss, she thought of nothing at all.

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Donna has had a passion for writing since the age of 8 when she wrote her first short story. During her sophomore year in high school, she wrote her first full-length novel, a science fiction romance. She wrote her second novel during her senior year, a fantasy romance. Needless to say, English and Creative Writing were always her favorite subjects. In between caring for six children, (7 counting her husband) she manages to carve out time to indulge in her writing obsession, with varying degrees of success, although she writes most often late at night instead of sleeping. A native of Arizona, she is currently a member of Desert Rose RWA where she serves as the chapter secretary, and is a member of Beau Monde, a Regency Chapter of RWA. She is the winner of two RWA Chapter contests and has finaled in several others. And yes, all of her heroes are patterned after her husband of 20 years, who continues to prove that there really is a happily ever after.