Torn - Part 1: The Torn Series (11 page)

The Tyler rock.
He wasn’t the most adventurous eater, to say the least, and I just sort of went along with whatever he wanted.
Story of my life.

I looked across the table at Mallet’s big grin and reminded myself to quit thinking about my stupid ex. I was spending a nice afternoon with a super hot guy - bruised though he was. I ought to enjoy it and quit fretting.

“You guys almost ready for your contest?” he asked. We walked hand in hand down the middle of the street while the fair bustled around us. The sun was hot and high in the sky, and walking on asphalt wasn’t helping matters. I wiped a drop of sweat from my forehead and dodged a pack of children running towards the candy apples booth.

“Battle of the bands? We’re getting there. It isn’t for another couple weeks.” I blew out a breath. “We’re just playing mostly the same covers. A couple of new ones, but still. All covers.”

He chuckled. “Getting bored already?”

“No!” Bored definitely wasn’t the right word.
Frustrated?
“I’m having a great time with the band, I love it. I just want to play something new once in a while.”

“So write something.” He nudged my ribs with his elbow. “Play it for them. See what they say. Not for the contest, I mean, you’re locked into cover songs for that now, right?” I nodded. “No reason not to nudge them in a new direction after, though.”

“You might be right,” I mumbled. I hadn’t written a song in a long while - not since before graduation back in May. What was that, three months ago? Four? Too long. I’d be getting rusty soon, if I wasn’t already. “What about you?” I asked. “Jen said you had a big fight coming up?”

I could feel him tense up next to me. “Yeah. Sort of.”

“A big deal?” I asked. “Is it for like, promoters or something? That’s what you’re doing, right, trying to attract promoters?”

He nodded. “It’s one part getting attention, one part personal.”

“Oh. So you’ve fought this guy before?”

His smile was grim. “Yes.” When he didn’t elaborate, I took that to mean that he didn’t win. He wouldn’t like to admit that out loud, though. I knew that much about him. “Here,” he said, pointing towards one of the little tented booths and dragging me behind him.
Time to change the subject, I guess.

He bought us both lemonade from a booth selling all sorts of smoothies and fruit bowls. I was still full of naan and curry after lunch but the cool drink was definitely welcome on such a hot day.

We stood aside and people-watched. He tugged me close to him despite the heat, tracing little circles on my arm with his rough fingertips. It made me shiver. For once my mind wasn’t racing with doubts. Just little hopes. Silly ones, like “I hope he actually likes hanging out with me,” and “Gee I hope he kisses me soon.” Simple hopes. I realized I was actually having fun - and not a bar or a beer or a drink in sight.

“I like you,” I admitted with a shy smile.

“Yeah?” He leaned down and kissed my forehead. His lips were cool. “I like you, too.” Then he kissed me, softly, sweetly, tasting like sugar and lemons.

Maybe I was being a dumb silly girl but I felt like we were standing on the crest of something big. Something beautiful. God, I really was the biggest dork ever. When I giggled against his kiss and then snorted as he withdrew, I only confirmed that thought for the both of us.

But the amusement in his eyes said that he liked me anyway.

CHAPTER 10

We made a pit stop at the Goodwill store in my neighborhood on our way back to my apartment. I hadn’t planned on stopping at home before my shift but I’d bought a couple t-shirts at the fair and wanted to drop them off. Plus we still had a little time to kill - Mallet didn’t seem to be in any sort of rush to be rid of me.

“Just want to browse the records for Lockett real fast,” he said.
Right. Other roommate.
I shuffled around the dusty old store, checking out the knick-knacks and the chotskies when I stumbled across an old television. It looked like an early model flatscreen, and it wasn’t very large - and it was cheap. Thirty bucks. I could spare thirty dollars to shut Tyler up for a while, for sure.

Mallet found me hovering over it. “No records?” I asked.

“Not what he’s looking for.”

I bit my lip. I knew it was a shitty request but now that I could picture the peace and quiet in my mind, I couldn’t just walk out. “If I bought this, would you help me carry it?”

“Need a new TV? Why not a bigger one?”

“It’s for Tyler.”

His eyes narrowed. “You mean the ex?”

“Yeah.” I spoke quickly, hoping to the get words out before he protested further. “I’m hogging the living room ‘cause I sleep late ‘cause I work late and he’s always bugging me about not being able to watch the TV in the morning. And well, if I give him one to stick in his room, even if he doesn’t use it, he can’t complain anymore, right?” I blew out a breath. “I think it’s a good plan.”

Mallet considered me for a moment, his mouth downturned with displeasure. “He dumped you and he lets you sleep on the couch, when it should have been him out there, and you in the bedroom. The dumper is the one who should move.”

I sighed. “I know.”

“So buying him a gift is what? A peace offering? He’s a jackass and your response is to buy him things?”

He was getting pretty worked up. I rested a hand on his wrist. “It’s just to get him off my back. That’s all. He
is
paying more rent, and its his name on the lease.” I pouted. “You don’t want me to end up homeless, do you? He’ll kick me out if I keep hogging the cable.”

His lips quirked, and he brushed my chin with his thumb. “That pout is going to fucking kill me. Fine. Let’s haul this thing home. You live in an elevator building, right?”

I laughed, “Yes!” then stood on my toes and kissed him. Because I could. Because he was going to be my boyfriend, I just knew it. Casual hookups didn’t take you to street fairs and carry home television sets.

I practically bounced the whole way back to my building. Walking beside Mallet while he carried the thing made me feel like we looked like a couple. And it was so nice of him to do me the favor. He watched me with a half-grin. “You’re gonna owe me for this one.”

“Yeah? Whatcha want?”

“You on your knees. You naked in my bed.”

I blushed. He always seemed to trot out the dirty talk when I wasn’t expecting it. “Sounds good to me,” I said.

Nice as he was being, I knew it wouldn’t be a pretty scene if Tyler was home. Sure enough when we passed inside, Mallet didn’t even say hello right away when I introduced them. He gave Tyler a long, slow up-and-down glare first, sizing him up like one of his opponents in the ring. “Where do you want this, bro?” he asked, hefting the TV.

Tyler pointed towards the bedroom and said, “On the floor. I’ll place it later.” He gave me a dirty look as I followed Mallet through the apartment.

You could practically see the tension in the air around us. I kept my eyes downcast - there was the teeniest, tiniest part of me that was a little amused by this; a little pleased. I never imagined I’d be the object of attraction for two guys. Sometimes I used to think I was super lucky to have Tyler and that no one else could possibly be interested if he left me. Untrue, I knew, but the feeling was there.

“Let’s put it on the dresser for him,” I said, pointing, ignoring Tyler’s request. It was where it was going to end up, anyway.

“So demanding, my little punk girl,” Mallet said with a wink. I didn’t miss the implication; I didn’t miss the “my” part of his sentence or the way his eyes flickered towards Tyler waiting in the doorway.

Tyler only waited patiently, his eyes slightly narrowed. We had to push past him to leave the room before he followed us towards the front door.

“Got a shift tonight so I’ll be home late,” I told Tyler.

“I’ll walk you to work,” Mallet said, hanging back in the hall. It sounded more like a demand than an offer.
Because Tyler’s listening.

“Yeah, thanks. Let me use the bathroom and we’ll go.”

He eyed Tyler up and down with barely concealed disdain. “I’ll wait downstairs.”

“Okay, see you out front!” I said a little too brightly. If they kept eying each other like that it might come to blows.
Or maybe they’ll get out a ruler and measure their dicks.

I rolled my eyes at myself in the mirror before stepping back out into the apartment. This
was
a bad idea. I’d have to think of a way to make it up to Mallet. He didn’t need to meet my ex-boyfriend or see my crappy living space. He’d been nothing but nice all day. What was wrong with me, was I trying to mess things up on purpose?

I found Tyler by the front door just as he placed my phone down on the side-table. “What are you doing?” I asked.

“The time,” he shrugged. “My battery’s dead.”

“Right.”
Trying to read my texts. Being a jealous jerk.
“Can I go?” I asked, gesturing. He was blocking my path through the open doorway.

“I just want to talk to you. Just one minute.” I gestured again, indicating that he could go on. “I want us to be together again,” he said. “I want you off that futon and back in my bed every night. I want to take you out. Come on, Alexa. We were together for so long. There’s bound to be some bumps along the way, but give us another chance.”

“What?”

“You heard me, Alexa, don’t do that. You don’t buy a television for your ex just to be nice. Come on. You want me back, too. You’ve wanted it this whole time.”

I blinked at him, dumbfounded. Where were all these words a couple months ago, when I actually wanted them, when I
needed
them? He was too late. I was different, now. I was moving on. “Tyler, I-”

He grabbed me with no warning and kissed me. I made a muffled sound of protest but was too shocked to do anything but freeze. His lips pressed so tightly against mine were both familiar and repulsive all at once. I heard something - someone - in the hall. It finally shook me from my state of shock and, with an offended “mmff,” I pushed away from Tyler.

“Fuck this.”
Mallet.
I clapped my hands over my mouth.

“Wait-” I croaked, but he was already turning away, skipping the elevator and heading for the stairs.

“Yeah, you’d better leave. She isn’t yours,
bro,
” Tyler said, emphasizing the word like the patronizing jerk he was. His hand clamped down on my shoulder, holding me back.

I wrenched free and looked to Tyler with disgust. He wore that smug little smirk that I hated so much. I should have chased after Mallet, grabbed him, made him understand, kissed him again. But I was glued there in place, mouth gaping, eyes stuck on the hateful curve of Tyler’s mouth.

“It’s time for us to be together again,” he said with a light shrug. “It’s obviously been what you really want.”

Tyler did this. He used my phone.

Did it even really matter? This was all my own fault. My head spun and my knees shook with the realization. I’d been stringing them both along. I’d led them both on without even knowing it. I’d been completely confused an unsure up until that very afternoon.

But that was no excuse.

I should have told Tyler to bug off that first time he said he missed me; I shouldn’t have tried getting closer to Mallet before getting my shit together; I should have moved out.

After another moment spent blinking dumbly, I finally got my feet moving and stepped into the hall, but Mallet was gone. Jogging down the stairs and out onto the street already, no doubt. I would never catch up.

Shit. Shit! What the hell have I done?!

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Torn Part 2

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