Authors: Brenda Stokes Lee

Toy's Story (5 page)

BOOK: Toy's Story

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Apparently,
all
of
those
years
of
doing
everything
for
myself
had
finally
caught
up
with
me,
ran
me
over
and
backed
up.

Sure,
I
had
all
the
wealth
any
one
person
needed
to
have
a
wonderful
life.
Anything
I
wanted
or
desired
I
could
purchase,
even
a
man.
I'll
admit
that
sometimes
I
helped
Jamar
out
financially.
Basically
under
educated
and
over
extended
he
worked
two
jobs
and
still
couldn't
pay
his
child
support
on
time.
I
didn't
mind
contributing,
after
all
he
gave
me
exactly
what
I
needed,
a
hard
dick
on
a
cold
and
lonely
night,
whenever
I
needed
it.
Somehow
I
never
realized
that
my
money
would
not
and
could
not
buy
me
love
and
devotion.

A
bit
late,
but
I
realize
that
now.

Chapter
3

Logic
returned
a
few
minutes
later.
"I'm
sorry.
I
just
needed
a
little
privacy."

"Don't
apologize.

I
understand.

I
probably
should
have
done
the
same.

I'm
sorry
you
had
to
see
my
nuclear
meltdown.
It's
just
been
a
very
long
day."

"Tell
me
about
it.
What
happened
to
your
truck
?"

"Well,
I
was
on
my
way
home..."

"Washington?"

"Yes.

I
had
a
deposition
that
I
had
to
get.
And
it
went
over
a
little
longer
than
I
anticipated."

"You're
an
attorney?"

"Yes.
I'm
a
Public
Defender.

So,
of
course
it
started
to
snow...

And
I
wanted
to
get
home
before
the
roads
got
too
treacherous,
so
I
was
pushing
it.
Out
of
nowhere
this
gigantic
deer
leaps
in
front
of
my
truck
and
just
stands
there.

I
couldn't
believe
it."

"They
say
that
the
headlights
mesmerize
them.
If
you
cut
off
the
lights
he
would
have
just
ran
away."

"Well,
I
didn't
know
that.

Anyway
I
had
nowhere
to
go
and
no
time
to
stop
so
I
hit
him."

"I
saw
the
tow
truck
leave
as
I
pulled
in.

It
looks
pretty
bad."

"Yeah,
it's
probably
totaled.
Sixty
thousand
dollars
worth
of
bent
metal
…
Thank
God
for
insurance.

I
just
got
it
last
month
for
my
birthday."
I
sighed.

"Did
Jamar
give
it
to
you?
He's
your
boyfriend,
right?"

"You're
funny.

No
Jamar
bought
me
the
Motown
Greatest
Hits
CD
Collection
and
I
was
shocked
he
even
remembered
my
birthday.

And
no
he's
not
my
boyfriend."

"That's
right;
your
man
is
the
cop
with
three
damn
guns."

Logic
teased.

The
smirk
on
my
face
indicated
that
he
was
dreading
in
dangerous
water.

"We've
already
established
the
fact
that
I
made
that
up.

So
can
I
please
continue?"

"Just
one
more
question.
You're
not
hurt
right?

I
mean,
I
can
go
with
you
to
the
hospital
if
you
want
to
get
checked
out."

"No,
I'm
fine.

The
airbag
punched
me
in
my
face,
but
I'm
okay.

In
retrospect that
punch
in
the
mouth
from
God
was
just
the
wakeup
call
I
need
to
get
my
life
in
order."

"Haven't
been
to
church
in
awhile,
huh?"
Logic
smiled.

"No,
I
go
to
church
almost
every
Sunday.
I
just
haven't
been
living
right
in
awhile."

I
giggled.

"God
knows
your
heart."
He
chuckled.
"And
he
honors
your
struggle."

"So,
you're
a
Christian."

"Yes,
and
like
you
I
struggle
everyday
to
do
the
right
thing.

It's
not
easy."

"People
sure
don't
make
it
easy.
Sometimes
you
have
to
just
cuss
a
bitch
out."
I
mumbled
beneath
my
breath,
but
of
course
he
heard
me."

"So,
I
guess
I
jinxed
you
with
that
song."
He
pried.

"Not
really.
He
was
never
my
man
and
my
heart
wasn't
even
in
it."

"Just
sex,
huh?"

"Yes,
mind
boggling,
back
cracking,
and
knee
buckling
sex."

"You
know
that
comes
with
love
sometimes,
right?"

"Yeah
I
heard
that.
I
just
haven't
encountered
it."
I
sarcastically
responded.

"You
should
try
it.
Love
makes
the
sex
ten
times
better."

"Really,
are
you
speaking
from
experience
or
reciting
something
you
heard?"

I
challenged.

"I'm
speaking
from
experience
and
talking
about
something
I've
heard."

"Well,
I'm
a
black
woman
if
you
haven't
noticed.

And
apparently,
there's
just
not
enough
single
men
and
good
love
to
go
around.

I'm
sorry Logic, but I’m
a
realist.

I
don't
like
to
pretend
or
play
make
believe
. S
o
I've
just
learned
to
keep
a
tight
rein
on
my
emotions
and
avoid
chasing
fairy
tales,
unicorns,
rainbows
and
Santa's
flying
reindeer."