Tracie Peterson - [Heirs of Montana 04] (12 page)

“So what did you think of Mr. Roosevelt?” Morgan asked Zane later as they readied for bed.

“He’s a man with ambition, to be sure.”

“I liked him from the first moment we met. He has a spirit about him that suggests great things.”

Zane sat down on the edge of the bed and yawned. “Did you get him settled in at the hotel?”

Morgan nodded and threw his boots to the corner. “He seemed well enough pleased, as did his traveling companion. He has his ranch foreman coming along with us. The man’s name is Merrifield. Anyway, I told them I’d call for them at five. We need to push on if we’re to get him back to New York by October.”

“I almost forgot,” Zane said, getting up. He went to the dresser and held up a letter. “News from Dianne. She’s not very happy.”

“What’s going on?”

“You can read it for yourself if you like.”

“Nah, just tell me about it. My eyes are nearly crossed as it is. I haven’t been this tired in some time.” Morgan stretched out on the bed, not even bothering to cover up.

“She says Cole’s father has passed away and Cole feels it’s necessary to stay through the winter to help his mother.”

“That can’t set well with Dianne.”

“No. She sounds pretty upset. Not at all happy. She’s worried that winter will pass and then of course it will be time to plant crops and Cole will decide to stay on to help with that. She says the boys are miserable. Cole’s insisted she put them in school, and they hate it.”

“I can well imagine. Remember what it was like for me? I thought I’d never learn to read, and then when I did, it still wasn’t up to the standards of everybody else. School can be hard.”

“She also says Lia isn’t well. Apparently the air is bad for her. Can’t be as bad as Butte,” he said with a laugh. “I feel sorry for them. She wishes I would write to Cole and ask him to return. Tell him how much we need them back here. What do you suppose I should do?”

“Stay out of it,” Morgan said, never even bothering to open his eyes. “Cole’s the man of the house, and Dianne needs to let him make the decisions.”

Zane replaced the letter and came back to the bed. He shook his head at Morgan’s outstretched body. “You’re going to want those covers by morning. I’d suggest you get back up and let me pull them down.”

Morgan groaned and rolled off the bed. “You’ve always enjoyed causing me pain.”

Zane laughed. “Hardly that. You seem to impose that on yourself.”

They crawled back into bed and Zane turned down the lamp. As the darkness engulfed the room, Zane heaved a sigh. “You know Mara Lawrence?”

“Sure. She’s the one living with the family in Virginia City. Her pa is that mean old cuss who Dianne thinks murdered her friends.”

“Right. Well, she’s made it pretty clear that she has feelings for me.”

Zane could feel Morgan shift to his side. Leaning up on his elbow, Morgan asked, “And what about you? Do you have feelings for her?”

“I can’t deny enjoying her company. But I’m twice her age.”

“Age shouldn’t matter. If you like her, why not court her?”

Zane closed his eyes, seeing Mara’s face in his mind. “It doesn’t seem that simple.”

“Why not?”

“It just doesn’t.”

Morgan fell back against the bed, his voice completely sober. “I can tell you from experience, if you like her, you need to act on it.”

“You’re thinking of Angelina, aren’t you?” His brother had been in love with a young woman only to lose her to their older brother, Trenton.

“I try not to think of Angelina.”

“But that’s why you said that, isn’t it?”

Morgan blew out a loud breath. “I should have told her from the get-go that I was in love with her. Maybe if I’d spoken my piece, she wouldn’t be married to our brother now. So if you’re in love with Mara Lawrence, I suggest you forget about the age difference and get to telling her the truth of it.”

“I suppose it couldn’t hurt to at least discuss it,” Zane said. He wasn’t known for being overly cautious, but this was a matter where brawn and brains couldn’t help him. Matters of the heart were not only confusing, they were downright scary.

“Would you do it over?” Zane asked. “If you could turn back time, would you do it differently—knowing what you know now?”

Morgan was quiet for several moments before replying. “I can’t honestly say. I know Trenton loves her and that they’re happy together. How could I deny my own brother that kind of happiness? It would take a pretty selfish man to wish that gone only so he could have it for himself. Now, if you don’t mind, I’d rather not talk about this anymore.”

“I understand, but I need to know something. I mean, if Mara is the right woman for me, that’s one thing. But maybe she’s not and I’d be denying her happiness with the right man.”

“Women seem to be pretty clear on letting their heart lead them. If Mara’s heart has chosen you, then you’d probably be better off just giving up.”

Zane stared at the ceiling trying to imagine life with Mara. He thought of her here in this bed, sleeping next to her rather than his brother. He tried to imagine her in his arms … the taste of her lips on his. He even envisioned her holding a baby—his baby. He wanted and needed a family more than anything else he could think of, and he had to admit, Mara Lawrence had wormed her way into his heart. But then so had other girls, and they hadn’t turned out to be the right ones. How could he be sure about this?

“Morgan?”

“Hmm?”

“What if I’m wrong? What if my feelings for her aren’t strong enough?”

“Ma always said that love and marriage were ten percent feelings and ninety percent hard work. I’m thinking you shouldn’t rely too much on what you feel for her. Think instead on whether you can spend the rest of your life with her—if you can work side by side, raise a family, things like that.”

Zane knew that Morgan was right. Feelings would fade. He thought of Dianne and how hurt she’d been by her husband’s decision to stay in Kansas. He’d once thought he’d never seen anyone more in love than Cole and Dianne. But here they were struggling and suffering. They had been having hard times ever since the fire and Cole’s decision to remain in Virginia City. Did he want to endure those kinds of difficulties with Mara Lawrence? Would she willingly follow him no matter where he led?

If I don’t pursue this,
Zane thought,
will there be another chance? Will another woman come along? A better woman?

“Morgan.”

Morgan yawned. “What’s a fellow gotta do to get some sleep around here?”

“Just answer me this, and then I promise to leave you alone.”

“All right. What do you want to know?”

“Has there ever been anyone else—after Angelina? You know, another woman who made you feel as special? A woman who you felt you could spend the rest of your life with?”

Morgan said nothing for several minutes. In fact, Zane thought perhaps he’d fallen asleep. Then without warning, he spoke and the sorrow in his tone made Zane sorry he’d asked.

“No, there’s never been anyone else, and I really don’t expect there will be. Losing Angelina was a very hard thing. Losing her to my brother was even worse. Now she’s in the family, but she’ll never be mine. It kind of makes me glad that Trenton had to leave the area and remain dead to the world.”

Zane thought of their elder brother’s past. Trenton’s outlaw days had never caught up with him, but it had been awfully close, especially when Mara’s stepmother learned of his past deeds. Of course, Trenton had been guilty by association more so than anything he’d actually done by his own hand. Still, he’d broken the law, and now he would have to either give up his life and face the penalties for that or remain in hiding. And with him, Angelina would bear the same sentence.

“I’m sorry if I caused you pain,” Zane said, rolling to his side. “I just needed to know.”

“And now you do. So tomorrow I’d suggest you go back to Virginia City and find your lady, and Mr. Roosevelt and I will move on to the Idaho Territory and find our goat.”

Zane laughed. “The sport will probably be similar in difficulty.”

“Not at all. Your prize wants to be caught.”

CHAPTER 9

“I’
M SO GLAD TO FIND YOU LADIES AT HOME
,” F
AITH
M
ONTGOMERY
said as she joined Ardith and Mara in the front sitting room. “I wanted to bring you this cake and see how you were doing without Dianne and Cole.”

Ardith took the cake and placed it on a side table. “I’m guessing this is one of your special burnt sugar cakes. I’ll be happy to serve it with supper.”

Mara had enjoyed this delicacy before and shook her head. “Oh, we surely don’t have to wait, do we? Couldn’t we have a slice with tea?”

Faith’s round brown face expressed her delight. “I can’t stay all that long. School will be ending for the day and I need to get back home.”

Mara thought the former slave to be one of the most beautiful women she’d ever met. Faith had beautiful dark eyes that seemed filled with joy and laughter. The woman had known horrible times, but her love of God seemed to conquer even those sad memories.

“My brother Joshua will be sorry he missed you, Faith. He tells me you two had quite a discussion after church on Sunday.”

“Indeed we did. He has a strong desire to reach out to all people, even black folk. He wanted to know about my people and some of the life I’d lived prior to the War Between the States.”

“That’s what he told me. He said you were quite informative. He truly has a passion for service. He doesn’t intend to stay here in the West, however. I believe he hopes to settle in a larger city, perhaps have a church with all types of people.”

“It won’t be well accepted on either side,” Faith said. “He’ll have much to overcome.”

“The city seems more forgiving than the small towns of the West,” Ardith interjected. “Folks out here aren’t too happy with people whose skin is colored other than white. The Chinese have suffered terribly, as have the Mexicans who’ve ventured this far north, and of course anyone of Indian blood.”

“Has Winona suffered because of her heritage?” Faith asked.

“She looks Indian—how can she not suffer? Children are cruel. They don’t care that Winona had no choice in her father. People don’t care that I had no choice. It’s simply a matter of prejudice.”

“And fear,” Faith added. “People don’t understand, and so they’re afraid. People see folks who are different and fear that those differences might somehow harm them.”

“But how can they take it out on a little girl?” Mara asked. “Winona is completely defenseless. It isn’t right.”

“It would be better if we were back on the ranch,” Ardith admitted. “Or at least if Winona were back on the ranch.”

Faith looked puzzled. “What are you saying?”

“Christopher Stromgren has written to me again. He’s the gentleman who wants me to go to New York. This time he’s included a train ticket.”

Neither Faith nor Mara could hold back their surprise.

“When did this arrive?” Faith asked.

“What do you plan to do?” Mara asked enthusiastically. She had heard Ardith speak about the offer to play piano in New York for some time. It was hard to imagine that she would actually take up the suggestion, but Mara couldn’t help but notice a certain look in Ardith’s expression. It was a look Mara had never seen before.

“The letter came two days ago. I’ve been thinking about nothing else since it arrived,” Ardith admitted. “It would be a wonderful change of life for me.”

“But what of Winona? If the people are cruel here, how will they be in the city?” Faith questioned. “You can hardly believe they would simply overlook her heritage.”

“I wouldn’t take Winona with me.”

Mara could scarcely believe her ears. “You’d leave your child behind? But who would care for her?”

“Dianne would give her a home. Winona needs to be back on the ranch. She misses Koko and Susannah. Koko is someone Winona can relate to … someone who understands what Winona is enduring.”

“But Dianne isn’t here and Koko is on the ranch, twenty-five miles away. How would you get Winona there?” Mara asked.

Ardith shrugged. “There are ways. My brother-in-law owns the freighting company, after all. I could always ask them to take us on the next delivery to the ranch. I could arrange with Koko to watch her until Dianne is able to return.”

“But Dianne has already stated that it will be spring before Cole even considers coming back. That’s a long time,” Faith said, her expression grave. “I hope you’ll put this to prayer and consider what you’re doing before you act on it.”

Ardith was obviously upset with the turn of the conversation. She got up quickly, the gray wool skirt swirling around her feet as she turned abruptly and began to pace. “Neither of you understand what I am bearing. I cannot remain here.”

Mara felt sorry for the older woman. She had seen Ardith deal with the sad loss of her husband and knew the widow was often overwhelmed with her child’s questions.

“Music has been a solace for me. It has helped me to overcome my sorrows in ways I never thought possible,” Ardith said in defense of her earlier comments. “I’ve been gifted with a musical talent that Mr. Stromgren believes should be shared with the world. I can’t help but think of how much this might bless both me and Winona.”

“And how would that be?” Mara asked softly.

Ardith stopped and stared at Mara for a moment. “I think it would be a blessing to be rid of this place for a time. Coming west has only served to harm me. First by nearly drowning in the river, then by being taken by Indians. I could write a long list of the wrongs done me, but it wouldn’t change a thing. But now I can change where I live … and my future.”

“But won’t your sorrows and memories simply follow you?” Faith questioned.

“You think you have all the answers,” Ardith retorted. “You think you know what’s best for me. Dianne always thinks so too, but she doesn’t know me … none of you do. I’m not at all the woman you think I am.”

“Maybe we don’t know your heart completely,” Faith said softly, “but we know pain when we see it, and I’ve never known a pain you could outdistance yourself from. Pain is something that you’ll take right along with your bags. Not only that, but by leaving Winona behind, you’ll add guilt.”