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Authors: Emma Jane

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Jamie gave
me a funny look but squeezed my hand reassuringly anyway.

“My mum was
a musician too. She played the piano. She wanted to be a piano teacher but she
couldn’t really afford to be, so she worked in a music shop until she had me.
She stayed at home for a few years then when I was about three or four, we
needed extra money. She saw an advert in the paper about a woman in the village
who needed help with childcare and my mum responded. The kid was Jake. His
parents died in a car crash and he was be raised by his gran. She couldn’t cope
very well but wouldn’t give him up. She kept saying that she lost her daughter;
she didn’t want to lose her grandson too. Well, anyway, she made an agreement
with my mum, which wasn’t much but that’s what my mum was like. She was all
heart and smiles. She made you feel warm, you know? Mum was being paid
something petty like a hundred pounds a week to look after Jake whenever his
gran needed a rest, which was most days. He spent ages with us. Sometimes we’d
play but mostly he teased me and wind me up. He’d listen while mum taught me
how to play the piano. He tried it once himself, but Jake’s tone deaf, I swear
even the spiders ran to safety. As Jake got older he spent more and more time
with us. When he was ten and I was nine, my dad went away for the week. He
worked in an insurance company and they had conferences in Dublin. He was a bit
worried about going because the weather was supposed to be bad but mum made him
go anyway. She said a week away would be good and he should treat it like a
holiday. It was bitterly cold out and it snowed heavy over the weekend. My mum
didn’t want to have to worry about Jake so she had him stay at ours. She made
sure his gran had everything she needed then brought him to ours. The neighbour
down the road was pregnant and already had small kids so mum checked in on her
too. We ate fish fingers and chips for tea, and we were allowed to share a
chocolate sponge for pudding. At around seven the power went out. It was dark
outside so mum lit some candles and got blankets and hot water bottles for me
and Jake. She said it’d be warmer if we both stayed in her bed. We played
downstairs with a torch and mum said she needed to check on the neighbour. She
was planning on bringing her and the kids back down to us in case she went into
labour. She told us not to worry if she was a while because she was only down
the road. She said we shouldn’t leave the house unless it was urgent because
the weather was so bad. If she was late back then we should just go climb in
bed and she’d check on us when she got in. Only she never came back.”

I grabbed
some tissue, and mopped up some of the mess that currently sat on face. Jake
went to give me a hug and I pushed him back. If he held me now, I’d break and I
needed to finish.

“When she
wasn’t there the next morning Jake said that she was probably at the hospital
with the neighbour. He made me breakfast. It was just cornflakes but he was
being a proper big brother. He told me to get dressed and he even attempted to
do my hair. You should have seen what I looked like. I wish I had a photo. Then
when mum wasn’t back that night he raided the cupboards for dinner. He couldn’t
cook so we had cheese sandwiches, crisps and some chocolate spread. Don’t ask,
he was only ten and he thought it would taste good. At nine o’clock we went to
bed and then again on the next morning he made breakfast. He said that later if
mum wasn’t back, he’d walk us to his gran’s. I said that mum told us not to go
out and he replied that it was urgent, we were out of chocolate biscuits. I
think he knew something was wrong by then but he didn’t want to tell me. At
lunchtime my dad came home. He was frantic. I’d never seen him like it. He was
crying and he kept holding me and Jake closely saying thank goodness we were
ok. He closed all the curtains in the house and told us to get dressed and put
our coats and shoes on. It turns out he came back a few days early because
although the weather wasn’t that bad in Ireland, he knew it would take ages to
get home because of the trains. Mum never made it to the neighbour. She slipped
and cracked her head two houses down. That house was deserted and the one in between
us had gone on holiday. The neighbour went into labour and she managed to call
someone to take her to the hospital. She’d left a note on her front door, the
first morning mum wasn’t home. It was still early so the street was dark and
she couldn’t see mum lying there. There aren’t any other houses down our road.
Dad was the first person to find her. It was in all the big papers and on the
news channels. They kept saying about how her two kids were only meters from
her body the whole time. We had to move schools and Dad left his job. The
reason Aaron wanted to be my manager was because he was a friend of Mum’s. He
knew that I stopped playing the piano when she died, he was just happy I hadn’t
given up on music altogether. So when he saw the video he came right over and
asked me.”

“You play
the piano now though.” I was surprised that’s all he said, but I was relived.

“When I got
mugged, I didn’t want to lose what was still good. I started to play again
slowly. The last track on the album is the only piano song I’ve ever finished.
Jake cried when he heard it, I cried the whole time I played it at the studio.
I was so happy I had that again.”

“So what’s
up with Jake?”

“A few weeks
ago, this reporter wanted to speak to him and me. It was just after we got found
out so we knew that they must’ve known something if they weren’t asking about
me and you. It freaked him out. He’s always thought that mum’s death was his
fault. That if he’d gone to look for her she would be alive. Just like he
thinks that the mugging was his fault because he said he’d walk me home from school
and he had to go to the dentists instead. The questions mess him up. He thinks
that everyone will blame him because he’s the older one. He doesn’t get that he
was just a kid. The other night he got a voicemail from Diana saying she’d
cracked her head open and she was in the hospital. He lost it. He thinks it’s
all happening again. When Aaron came over he got Jake to the hospital and he
and Dad made him check himself in. When Jake was younger he got treated for
Post-traumatic stress disorder. He’s had a setback. Jake’s had a hard life. He
was in the car with his parents, then he lost my mum and his gran died a few
years later. He thinks everything bad in the world is his fault. He tries to
make up for it by protecting me and he can’t stop the reporters from trying to
ruin me with the story. I can’t stop them either. Aaron managed to get an
injunction because we were just kids but he can’t get that in every country.
They’re already getting ready to print over here. I don’t know how to stop it.
Once this is released the floodgates open. People that do know about my mum are
being respectful, but when that’s a public fact they’ll say about my mugging,
they’ll sell the stories of me fighting with a bimbo because she broke Jake’s
heart. Then my boyfriend from before the mugging will give the details of my
first love and how he couldn’t stand the scars. He’ll probably miss out the
part where Jake beat the shit out of him because he dumped me when I needed him.
I think this will be what Graham refers to as ‘bad for my image’.”

Jamie moved
right next to me and held me close. I leant into him and closed my eyes. He
wiped away a few of my tears.

“I know you
can’t stop it Kaitlyn, but you could control it.”

“How?”

“Don’t let
them have the exclusive. Tell everyone first.”

“Somebody
always has the exclusive. It’s what sells the papers.”

“What sold
your first single? A record company or you on Youtube.”

“You think I
should air my secrets on Youtube?”

“I didn’t
mean that exactly, but I suppose that’s one way. Tell everyone your way. Tell
them why you’re doing it that way as well. Stick your finger up at every paper
out there, who’s tried to put you down. If you tell the world first then you
have the exclusive. No one knows your life better than you. They can’t up that.
Then if it gets too much I’ll strip in the middle of Oxford Street and do
Gangnam style so it’ll distract them from you.”

That’s
exactly why I loved Jamie. Even when I was sobbing my eyes out and a complete
mess telling him what a screw up my life was, he still made me laugh.

***

Jamie made
his speciality for lunch; Chinese takeaway. We started listing ideas and he
told me about two kids he met at a high school fate yesterday. He wanted me to
meet them because he thought I’d be able to help them somewhat. He also
suggested speaking to the girl from the audience of the Howard Collins show. I
made a list of people of other people and added Howard Collins to the list. He
might have creeped me out and Jamie even more, but the reason I went to his
show first was because I was comfortable there and Aaron knew I would be. Aaron
must have had a good reason if he trusted them. I added to find out why on the
to-do list I was making on the table.

“Why is your
guitar called Oliver?”

“Where did
that come from?”

Jamie held
up the piece of paper where he’d added Oliver to the potential guest list.

“My mum was
called Olivier. I played because of her, but my guitar is a man.”

“A man huh?”

“A very
manly man.”

We sorted
through the list and made annotations all over it.

“In a few
months, when I’ve finished filming, I’m going to take a few months off. Graham
had scheduled a break and although I’m going to do a few things here and there.
I want to do some youth work. The principle at the high school asked if I was
interesting in doing some workshops and mentoring. I said yes.”

“That’s
brilliant. What will you do in your workshops?”

“I have no
idea. There will obviously have to be some drama but I want to include some
life skills, things that people will use every day.”

“Like
cooking?” I teased him.

“I could
learn with them but to be honest, I think I’d rather get obese and eat
Chinese.”

“I second
that only I’d eat Pizza.”

“Traitor. I
told the principle I’d ask you if you’d do some workshops.”

“I think I’d
like to do that. If I survive this, I’d like to share my music. My mum used to
say that music is for everyone. You make it to fix yourself but you play it to
fix everyone else. Tell him I’ll do a couple, but remind him that I live in
England.” Jamie smiled.

“Ok, I’ll
tell him that. Your mum sounds like a very wise woman.”

“She was.”

 

Jamie

“Welcome
to the Howard Collins Show. We’ve got a special for you tonight. For the first
time ever we have a celebrity take over! Our favourite newest couple Jalyn have
taken over the show. Yes that’s Jamie and Kaitlyn! So all the way from
Hollywood, and from the top of the charts let’s give a warm welcome to Jamie
Stark and Kaitlyn Fox”

I took
Kaitlyn’s hand and together we walked out of the green room. She hadn’t dared
eat anything all day in case she ended up being sick on the show. She looked
pale and it wasn’t helped by the fact we’d banned anyone (other than Howard
Collins) from wearing make-up. We wanted to show everyone that we were real and
this was real. There was a round of applause as we came out and we held our
joined hands up and gave them all a wave. A lot of the usual crew were in the
audience tonight because they weren’t needed much since we’d brought a lot of
people with us. The rest of the audience were probably quite surprised that
Howard’s listed guests were nowhere in sight but they all signed a secrecy
contract anyway. Anyone that wouldn’t sign wasn’t allowed in, so they had to
put up and shut up or go home.

“So Jamie, I
was quite surprised to hear from you the other day. I was especially surprised
to hear you wanted to steal my show!” Howard played up the dramatics, causing
the audience to be worked up. “So why don’t you explain what’s going on?”

“Well first
of all we’d like to thank you for letting us on but I’m not running the show
tonight Kaitlyn is. You see we’ve been having a few issues.” Howard winked at
the audience and everyone cracked up. “So once again, I might have to strip on
your show. Only this time it’ll be Kaitlyn’s clothes I’ll be taking off.”

The audience
oohed and Kaitlyn laughed. Howard pretended to blush. We’d told him parts of
what we were doing and he knew we were going to show off Kaitlyn’s scars.

Howard put
on a serious face for a moment and looked directly at the audience and cameras.

“I would
like to put forward now that there will be no profit made from tonight’s show.
And money which is made will automatically be donated to Great Ormand Street
Hospital. We will also be dealing with some sensitive issues and support
information will be given at the end of the show.” Howard turned to Kaitlyn and
brought a smile back to his face. “So you’re wearing the trousers Kaitlyn, why
don’t you tell us of your issues.”

I took
Kaitlyn’s hand and she took a deep breath.

“Not many
people know much about me, Howard and it’s about time they did. You see, I’m
guilty of the super injunction and we all know how that turned out for Ryan
Giggs. So backstage I have a few people who I’d like to bring out.”

BOOK: Uncovering Kaitlyn
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