Read Until the End of Time Online
Authors: Melanie Schuster
Until the End of Time (30 page)
Renee was stricken with guilt for a moment. She had been so caught up in her own world of misery that she’d almost forgotten the complicated case that had kept Andrew in Detroit while she went to Atlanta. She tried not to let her shame show as Andrew went on to explain to her what had occurred during the surgery and after.
“
I’ve been spending most of my time at the hospital monitoring the babies which is why I look so bad. In fact, I just came home to see about the dogs and get some clean clothes. There’s a press conference tomorrow morning and I didn’t think I would have time to come get a shirt and tie or something. But now that you’re home, I think I’ll stay here for a few hours.” He ended this statement with a huge yawn. “Oh baby, I had no idea how tired I am. I’ve just been going non-stop and I think it all just caught up with me.” He excused himself while he yawned again.
I’ve been spending most of my time at the hospital monitoring the babies which is why I look so bad. In fact, I just came home to see about the dogs and get some clean clothes. There’s a press conference tomorrow morning and I didn’t think I would have time to come get a shirt and tie or something. But now that you’re home, I think I’ll stay here for a few hours.” He ended this statement with a huge yawn. “Oh baby, I had no idea how tired I am. I’ve just been going non-stop and I think it all just caught up with me.” He excused himself while he yawned again.
Renee swallowed hard to get past the huge lump in her throat.
Bad timing, bad
timing
. There was no way she was going to bring Andrew down now; she would just have to wait until the time was right. In the meantime, there was something she could do for him.
Bad timing, bad
timing
. There was no way she was going to bring Andrew down now; she would just have to wait until the time was right. In the meantime, there was something she could do for him.
“
Why don’t you go upstairs right now and take a hot bath? I’ll run it for you and I’ll even scrub your back. Then after you have had a nap, we can eat dinner, how does that sound?” she said sweetly.
Why don’t you go upstairs right now and take a hot bath? I’ll run it for you and I’ll even scrub your back. Then after you have had a nap, we can eat dinner, how does that sound?” she said sweetly.
The look of gratitude on Andrew’s face was worth any price to Renee. They disentangled themselves from each other and Renee preceded him up the stairs. She dumped lavish amounts of mineral salts into the tub and filled it with hot water. The clean, green scent of pine and horse chestnut filled the room as Andrew walked in naked as a jaybird with no embarrassment whatsoever. He gave a great sigh of pleasure as the blue-green water surrounded him and Renee adjusted a bath pillow behind his head.
“
I’ll be back in 10 minutes. Don’t fall asleep,” she cautioned.
I’ll be back in 10 minutes. Don’t fall asleep,” she cautioned.
Andrew assured her that he would manage to stay awake. “Just don’t be too long. I seem to remember something about getting my back scrubbed that I liked the sound of very much,” he added.
Renee managed a cheerful little smile before closing the door behind her. She stood in the hallway for a moment with her head down and her hands balled into fists so tight that her nails pierced her skin painfully. She took a deep, shuddering breath as she descended the stairs, with her fingers working in their familiar rhythm,
one, two, three, four…one, two, three, four…
one, two, three, four…one, two, three, four…
***
A week had slipped by and Renee had still not found a way to approach Andrew with her dilemma. She simply could not find the words to tell him that his brother had somehow formed a liaison with the man who had raped her years before in Pittsburgh. How in the hell Donnie had managed to dig up the one person in broadcasting that she had cause to hate above anyone in the world, she would never know. To be honest, she still didn’t know the details of their partnership. All she knew was that it was something involving Clay’s company, The Deveraux Group, and the Cochran family radio conglomerate, Cochran Communications. Under normal circumstances, this would be a really big deal, something to celebrate and rejoice in; after all Donovan Bailey was a name to be reckoned with in broadcasting.
This was quite a coup for Donnie, something akin to getting Bryant Gumbel to be the anchor on a local radio station. Whatever the plans were, they were sure to bring in a ton of money for all concerned.
As long as you don’t mind working
with a rapist
, she thought bitterly. Renee was in her office at Urban Oasis, ostensibly making plans for the annual Christmas party she threw for her employees and patrons. What she was really doing was trying to avoid any and everything that would remind her of Donovan Bailey and the fact that such a creature existed. She made neat stacks of all the pertinent papers on her desk, mostly invoices and holiday greetings. Keeping her hands busy seemed to lull her into a neutral state, but only for a moment or so. She rubbed her temples in small circles, trying to relieve the headache that she suffered with constantly since that horrid night in Atlanta.
As long as you don’t mind working
with a rapist
, she thought bitterly. Renee was in her office at Urban Oasis, ostensibly making plans for the annual Christmas party she threw for her employees and patrons. What she was really doing was trying to avoid any and everything that would remind her of Donovan Bailey and the fact that such a creature existed. She made neat stacks of all the pertinent papers on her desk, mostly invoices and holiday greetings. Keeping her hands busy seemed to lull her into a neutral state, but only for a moment or so. She rubbed her temples in small circles, trying to relieve the headache that she suffered with constantly since that horrid night in Atlanta.
A discreet knock sounded on her office door, and before she could speak, Valerie, her manager entered with a look of concern on her face. She handed Renee a cup of Earl Grey tea and a headache powder saying, “Don’t even pretend like you don’t need this, ‘cause I can tell that you do.” She then stood over Renee like a sentry until the powder was dispatched and a good bit of the tea had been consumed.
“
Renee, I don’t know what’s wrong, but I can tell you feel like hell. Why don’t you take off today and get some rest. I can handle everything here, it’s why you pay me the big bucks, remember?” she added, hoping her lame joke would make Renee smile a little.
Renee, I don’t know what’s wrong, but I can tell you feel like hell. Why don’t you take off today and get some rest. I can handle everything here, it’s why you pay me the big bucks, remember?” she added, hoping her lame joke would make Renee smile a little.
Valerie’s concern wasn’t misplaced because Renee didn’t look well. Her normal vibrant skin color was rather ashen and she was obviously not sleeping well, if at all. She apparently was not eating, either as she had lost enough weight for it to be noticeable. And Valerie’s kind words seemed to push her over the edge—to Val’s horror, Renee’s eyes filled with huge tears. Valerie had never, ever seen Renee in such a fragile state. She immediately went around the desk and put her arms around Renee. Rocking her back and forth, Valerie begged her to share her pain.
“
Renee, what is it? Are you and Andrew having problems? Is something wrong with your family, what? You can tell me anything, honey, you know you can,” she coaxed. “You need to try and talk about this so we can make it go away,” she said persuasively.
Renee, what is it? Are you and Andrew having problems? Is something wrong with your family, what? You can tell me anything, honey, you know you can,” she coaxed. “You need to try and talk about this so we can make it go away,” she said persuasively.
Renee sat up and gently extricated herself from Valerie. “That’s just it, Val. It won’t go away,” she muttered. “Not unless I make it and I don’t know how, not yet.” She took a deep, shuddery sigh and almost laughed at the look on Valerie’s face.
“
I know, I’m not making sense. Nothing makes sense right now. But,” she glanced at her wall clock before continuing, “I’m going to take care of that right now. I hope. I’m taking your advice, I won’t be back today.” Renee stood up and gave the still shocked Valerie a hug. “Thanks for caring about me, kiddo, it means a lot.”
I know, I’m not making sense. Nothing makes sense right now. But,” she glanced at her wall clock before continuing, “I’m going to take care of that right now. I hope. I’m taking your advice, I won’t be back today.” Renee stood up and gave the still shocked Valerie a hug. “Thanks for caring about me, kiddo, it means a lot.”
Renee gladly handed Valerie the list of things that still needed doing for the Christmas party, then put on her Calvin Klein topcoat and left by the back door. If Yolanda couldn’t help her get back on track with this, no one could.
***
After refusing Yolanda’s offer of tea, Renee started doing what she normally did when she was trying to avoid an unpleasant topic, she started fidgeting. She meandered around the large, homey room staring at familiar objects as though they were displayed under glass at the Detroit Institute of Arts. She gave quiet, monosyllabic answers to Yolanda’s remarks until even she couldn’t stand it anymore. Suddenly, she turned to Yolanda with her fear etched broadly across her face.
“
Yolanda, that
was
Donovan Bailey that I saw at the airport. I saw him again in Atlanta. And what’s worse, he is going into some kind of business with Andrew’s family and with Clay Deveraux’ company,” she said quietly. Barely pausing for breath, she told Yolanda the whole unpleasant story.
Yolanda, that
was
Donovan Bailey that I saw at the airport. I saw him again in Atlanta. And what’s worse, he is going into some kind of business with Andrew’s family and with Clay Deveraux’ company,” she said quietly. Barely pausing for breath, she told Yolanda the whole unpleasant story.
Yolanda’s reaction was plain to see because she couldn’t keep her dismay from flitting across her expressive face. “My God, Renee! What happened when you told Andrew how you knew this man? I’m surprised that his brother would even consider a business arrangement with a creature like that!”
Renee confessed that she had not yet told Andrew that Donovan was the man who had raped her. “Yolanda, when I got back here I was going to tell him right away. But he was so tired from the surgery and there was all that follow-up and hoopla afterwards that it just didn’t seem fair to dump my troubles on him. Everybody who is anybody has interviewed him, did you know that? Not just Andrew, of course, the whole surgical team. They’re going to be written up in People and Life and they’re going to be on the Discovery Channel and some other things, I can’t remember them all,” she finished. Renee could tell that Yolanda wasn’t buying it, and her first words proved it.
“
Renee, it’s wonderful that the surgery went so well and that Andrew is getting this much deserved admiration and recognition. But you matter, too! You’re making decisions for Andrew about his priorities, and that’s something that you’re not equipped to do. I know that you’re concerned about his time and you appreciate the stress under which he has been operating, but you have to let Andrew decide what he can and can’t deal with; you can’t play God for him,” Yolanda said gently.
Renee, it’s wonderful that the surgery went so well and that Andrew is getting this much deserved admiration and recognition. But you matter, too! You’re making decisions for Andrew about his priorities, and that’s something that you’re not equipped to do. I know that you’re concerned about his time and you appreciate the stress under which he has been operating, but you have to let Andrew decide what he can and can’t deal with; you can’t play God for him,” Yolanda said gently.
Instead of reassuring her, Yolanda’s words had the opposite effect on Renee. She got up from the couch where she had finally perched, and resumed wandering with a vengeance. She was making minute adjustments to every object on every surface she came to, still letting the sound of Yolanda’s voice wash over her.
“
From what you have told me of Andrew, your well-being is of paramount concern to him. The longer you put off discussing this with him, the more confused and hurt he’s liable to be. Besides, it may very well be that if you wait, his brother and Bennie’s husband will find themselves in a business arrangement they cannot get out of.”
From what you have told me of Andrew, your well-being is of paramount concern to him. The longer you put off discussing this with him, the more confused and hurt he’s liable to be. Besides, it may very well be that if you wait, his brother and Bennie’s husband will find themselves in a business arrangement they cannot get out of.”
That got Renee’s full attention, and she swirled around to face Yolanda. “But Yolanda, the only way they wouldn’t go through with this is if they know the whole story of what happened between me and that creature and I don’t know if I could handle them knowing. I know it seems irrational after all this time, but I just don’t know if I could stand for them to know what happened,” she admitted.
Yolanda sighed, and asked Renee to come back and sit down, which she did. After she was seated, Yolanda joined her on the couch and took both Renee's hands in her own.
“
Renee, you know that Bennie’s family feels as though you are a part of them. Her brothers, with the exception of Andrew, view you as another sister. Andrew loves you and wants to marry you. Do you think for a moment that these people would willingly enter into a business agreement with a man who’s harmed a member of their family? Don’t you think that you should at least give the opportunity to decide on their own what their course of action should be?”
Renee, you know that Bennie’s family feels as though you are a part of them. Her brothers, with the exception of Andrew, view you as another sister. Andrew loves you and wants to marry you. Do you think for a moment that these people would willingly enter into a business agreement with a man who’s harmed a member of their family? Don’t you think that you should at least give the opportunity to decide on their own what their course of action should be?”
Renee had to take back her hands to dash away the hot tears she felt forming. Yolanda made it all seem so simple, and maybe it was…but maybe it wasn’t. She knew, though, there would be no peace for her until she confided everything in Andrew.
“
I know you’re right, Yolanda, I know you are,” she murmured. “I just haven’t been able to find the words to say to him. I know that every day I hesitate is making it harder, but I just haven’t been able to find the way to tell him,” she sighed. “God, I am such a coward! After all this time, you would think that I wouldn’t be such a ninny, and look at me. I’m the one who was going to try and kill him, remember? I can’t even
tell
on the bastard, much less seek revenge,” she snorted.
I know you’re right, Yolanda, I know you are,” she murmured. “I just haven’t been able to find the words to say to him. I know that every day I hesitate is making it harder, but I just haven’t been able to find the way to tell him,” she sighed. “God, I am such a coward! After all this time, you would think that I wouldn’t be such a ninny, and look at me. I’m the one who was going to try and kill him, remember? I can’t even
tell
on the bastard, much less seek revenge,” she snorted.
Yolanda reached over and took her hand again. “And as long as you can’t articulate it, he has power over you. Remember how old folks used to say, “tell the truth and shame the devil”? That’s what you’ve got to do, Renee. Take the power away from him. You have me and Andrew and Ceylon and everyone else on your side. You may not believe it right now, but you do. Take the power away from him,
now
.”
now
.”
Yolanda’s words continued to pound through Renee’s aching head the rest of the day. She knew that Yolanda was absolutely right, that by not exposing Donovan Bailey for the creep that he was, she was giving him power over her life. The same power that he had taken away from her so many years ago was being stripped away again. There was only one way that she could free herself from this trap, and that was to tell Andrew that Donovan Bailey was her rapist and that through some bizarre twist of fate he was about to begin a business enterprise with his family’s business.
Logically, this was the only way that she could regain the ground she was losing, but logic wasn’t known for having a pretty sound or taste. The words wouldn’t be easy to say or pleasant to hear, but they were necessary. By the time she reached home, she was steely with resolution. She and Andrew were going to have that much-needed talk tonight, as soon as he got to her house. She glanced at the clock on her dashboard as she pulled into the garage. She had time enough for a hot shower and a change of attire, something that was akin to donning the armor of a Samurai in her estimation.
After tending to the little dogs she ran upstairs to prepare for the evening. Her phone started ringing as soon as she got into her sitting room, but her irritation turned to happiness as she realized it was Andrew.
“
Listen, sweetheart, I want to take you out for dinner tonight. I’m at the station taping an interview, so why don’t you come by and we will leave from here. Unless you’d rather I picked you up,” he added.
Listen, sweetheart, I want to take you out for dinner tonight. I’m at the station taping an interview, so why don’t you come by and we will leave from here. Unless you’d rather I picked you up,” he added.
Renee agreed that meeting him was more expeditious and they set a time to meet. “Andy? I love you,” she whispered. She could actually hear his answering smile over the telephone.
“
Baby, every time you say that I get…well, I’ll show you tonight,” he promised. “And I love you, too, more than you know,” he said softly before ending the call.
Baby, every time you say that I get…well, I’ll show you tonight,” he promised. “And I love you, too, more than you know,” he said softly before ending the call.
***
By the time Renee had showered, perfumed and pampered her way into a red cashmere sweater that was one of Andrew’s favorites, she was feeling much better. She noticed that her black leather jeans were much looser than they should have been, something that ordinarily would have elated her but now was rather depressing.
Just another service of that bastard Donovan Bailey—loss of appetite.
The brief observation just fueled her determination to tell Andrew everything.
Just another service of that bastard Donovan Bailey—loss of appetite.
The brief observation just fueled her determination to tell Andrew everything.
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