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Authors: Farrah Abraham

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And I am going to have it.

Chapter Two

 

“I hear the reviews for the prescreening are doing really
well,” says Giulia.

I run my hands through my hair and settle back into the
comfortable chaise in Giulia’s office. She’s been my therapist for the last
year and I have really been able to connect with her. She has wavy hair and
intelligent gray eyes that let me know I can tell her anything without fearing
her judgment. That is exactly what I need, especially now.

“Yeah, that’s what they’re saying.” I kick off my shoes and
let them hit the soft carpet beneath us. Usually I am more careful with things
like that but today I just need to relax. “I guess I should be more excited.”

Giulia unbuttons the top button of her jacket and mimics my
shrug. The pages of her notepad flutter as she looks through what she’s got
written. “Seems to me that you’ve got more on your mind than keeping up
appearances.”

That catches my attention. It’s unlike her to give her opinion
so openly unless I ask for it. “What do you mean?”

She sighs a little and I know she’s about to say something
that she shouldn’t. Sometimes she blurs the line between being my therapist and
being my friend. I know most people would say it is unprofessional but to me,
it’s invaluable honesty. She tells me how she sees things in these moments
instead of spouting off the usual therapist “And how does that make you feel?”

“Well, don’t get me wrong, it’s great to see you up on the
screen. Your face is on billboards and in magazines. And not just those ratty
tabloids, you’re in all sorts of things.”

I nod, waiting for her to continue. She knows I don’t need
my ego stroked so there must be a point coming.

“You worked really hard to get that respect and it’s a huge
accomplishment. Anyone who knows you would say so.”

“But?”

“But it feels like you feel like you’re wasting your time.
Does that make sense?”

I have to take a moment to reflect on her confusing
sentence. I take my time, knowing that Giulia will wait for as long as I need.
There is no rush. “You mean that I have somehow given you the impression that I
feel like I should be doing something else with my time?”

Giulia does something that she has never done before. She
hands me her notepad. I take it with wide eyes, unsure as to whether I want to
see myself the way that she sees me with her discerning gaze. She has flipped
to a page marked “Fallon’s Work”.

In clear, neat handwriting she’s detailed my feelings over
the last couple of months and how they correlate with the projects I’ve been
doing. I don’t know why I expected her notes to be filled with medical jargon.
They look a lot like my day planner. She has smiley faces here and there,
placed near projects I am excited about. On the other hand, she has straight
and sad faces next to various other projects. Modeling appointments, casting
calls, and endorsement deals. I hadn’t even realized how uninterested I was in
these projects until they were presented to me in such neat little lists.

“I’m…satisfied.” I whisper the words as if they were a
sacrilege. I have always wanted to be an actress, to be a world-renowned model.
Haven’t I? Thinking about my struggles with Virginia Ricki and HALE’O, I
thought that had always been the goal.

But now that I have it, it feels…hollow. Small. I think back
to the way I feel every time I’m in my office. Being on the screens was a rung
in the ladder. I’ve reached that threshold but my ambition isn’t satisfied what
do I really want?

“Are you?” Giulia takes her notepad back with a raised
eyebrow. “I don’t think you are.”

I would bristle at her tone but I have to remember that she
is here to help me. Everything she says is geared toward making sure I get what
I want out of life.

I lay my head against the headrest of the chaise. I have
taken a lot of risks to get to where I am now. I launched my career with some
of the hardest earned money imaginable. My time as a Sugar Baby has been
enlightening and fun but it could have easily worked against me. Starting my
own companies has given me the chance to turn the entertainment business on its
ear.

And boy, have I?

The bigwigs who had looked down their noses at me quickly
turned around when it was me buying out corporations and betting on the best
stocks. It helped that I had made so many friends in high places. I had the
right people backing me and everyone else had been forced to either get out of
my way or get in line.

But I hadn’t come out unscathed. It had been a dirty, ugly
year. I had had my name smeared across an impossible number of pages. Previous
lovers and distant relatives had come out of the woodwork, just to hop on the
bandwagon of “bring down Fallon Opal”.

What I hadn’t counted on was that not all of my opponents
had been the sleazy haters I was used to. I wasn’t just challenging the
entertainment business when I stepped into the limelight. I was also
challenging regular businessmen who didn’t want a young, beautiful woman eating
at a table that had been exclusively for old men.

I had muscled my way through the red tape and the
difficulties. I had even gone so far as to get the mayor on my side. Politics
was an ugly, harsh world but I had found that it was just a convoluted as the
mainstream media. Everything was connected and in the end, it all came down to
whose pockets were deeper.

Mine.

Giulia doesn’t say anything, even though I’ve been lost in
my thoughts for a while. The bomb I dropped with my last sentence probably blew
her mind but she leans back and draws in her notepad. After a few minutes, she
pushes a button in her chair arm and music begins to play.

This is one of my favorite parts of therapy with Giulia.
Sometimes it feels as if it’s the only time I really get to relax. I pull my
knees up to my chest and take a few deep breaths. This has been my goal for so
long that thinking about focusing elsewhere almost makes me panicky. But I can
do this. I just have to let myself grow in that direction. “I think I’m done
with the movies. I want to focus on making my corporation an empire.”

The declaration feels like it comes from the pit of my
stomach. Just saying it lifts a weight off my shoulders. But when I look at
Giulia, I can tell she’s still waiting for something. “What is it?” I ask.

She hesitates. “Well, don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that
you’ve come to this conclusion on your own. I know the money isn’t why you’ve
kept up with these endeavors, and I was worried that you were only continuing
them as a giant f-you to the people who doubted you but that’s not work I’m
talking about.”

“Then you’ll have to enlighten me because I’m not sure what
you mean.”

Giulia shifts in her seat. “When you first began therapy,
you spoke of your goals and ambitions. Some of them were professional. And you
have focused a lot of your time and energy on accomplishing those goals. But
what about the things you were looking for in your personal life? Have you
given up on them?”

Her gentle words stop me in my tracks. It’s a good question,
one that I haven’t considered in much too long. It is true that I have been
working hard to make all of my professional dreams come true. I have been in
some big name movies, had the best sponsors, and can have my pick of any
eligible bachelor in New York—maybe even the world. I’ve kissed plenty of
frogs.

But I haven’t found my prince.

I sit back up, the music no longer smoothing my ruffled
feathers. “I’ve done everything I can in that department. It’s just not
something you can just
get
.”

“Oh, I know.” Giulia snorts and I get the impression she’s
speaking from experience. “I just mean that I’m worried you are going to work
yourself into a pit. You know, like you won’t be able to see the forest for the
trees.”

I bite my bottom lip and shift uncomfortably. “It’s not like
I want to be alone. And you know that I’m dating—”

“Barry.” She interrupts me. “Yes, I know. But we both know
that Barry is not going to be a permanent fixture in your life.”

I want to be shocked or offended but I can’t. Barry doesn’t
fit into my life. I can’t take him to places where I might meet clients or
paparazzi. He isn’t respectable, even if I like him more than any of the other
guys I have dated recently. He’s just not the right kind of person for the
social circles that I frequent. But that doesn’t mean that I want to give him
up.

“Maybe he and I can make it work. It would be difficult but
we could make it work if we tried.”

Hearing it in my own ears doesn’t make it any more viable,
but I pull my shoulders back and look Giulia in the eyes. I need her to believe
that this is possible because I want it to be. I haven’t known Barry for very
long but in the two months we’ve been dating, I have grown to at least want to
have a future with him.

Giulia smiles. “You’ve got that look in your eyes again.
That look that says you’ll do whatever you have to, to make your goal a reality.”

I flash her a smile and it feels like the first genuine one
I’ve had in weeks. She’s right. I’m going to try to make it work with Barry,
and the first step is letting him inside my world.

I slide off the chaise and walk back over to my purse where
I left it near the door. My phone chirps as it powers up and I immediately text
Barry:
Babe. Dinner tonite? I’ll make plans.

I don’t know why but I feel like my heart is going to leap
from my chest while I wait for his response. Giulia offers me a cup of chamomile
tea and I drink it to steady my hands.

Almost fifteen minutes go by before an answering chime goes
off.
Place & time.

He likes to make me wait but he doesn’t waste time on stupid
questions. That’s just one more thing to like about Barry. I send him a
response and immediately call Arianna. She won’t be happy about actually having
to work for her paycheck but I have just the restaurant in mind. Getting
same-day reservations is going to be a pain but with my clout, it shouldn’t be
a too bad.

Chapter Three

 

“Reservation for two. Opal.”

Barry and I stand up simultaneously when my name is called.
A sharp-dressed woman with classy pearl chopsticks in her dark hair extends a
carefully friendly smile to greet us.

I move toward the hostess with clipping steps, extending my
hand in greeting. “Thank you for having us,” I say as if speaking to a friend
who invited me over for a meal. This is the kind of familiarity afforded to me
by my rank as a celebrity and business owner. “I hope you have my usual table
ready.”

The hostess offers me a warm, easy smile after shaking my
hand. “Of course, Miss Opal. Right this way.”

I move carefully, minding the sexy slit in my dress. I have opted
to dress the part and am wearing a Chinese-style dress that hugs my curves. This
is one of the most expensive Asian bistros in the city. The sushi and prepared
seafood are considered the best in the country.

It is nothing like you would see from a cheap Chinese take-out
place. This restaurant has high-end everything. From the black cherry floors,
to the expensive lighting that casts a purple glow everywhere it touches, this
place screams opulence. At the center of the modest space, there is a sushi bar
where chefs expertly cut slices of wet, pink flesh.

The smell of soy sauce and wasabi assaults my senses in the
best ways. I take a deep breath, my mouth watering.

We walk through the restaurant, heading for the second
floor. There, a mezzanine overlooks the rest of the establishment and is
furnished with low tables and fluffy cushions meant to be used in place of
chairs. It is easily the most coveted section of the expensive restaurant but
there are only four or five tables set up and each of them is reserved for the
biggest names in the business.

New York can be a harsh place if you don’t know the right
people. It just so happens that I am the exact kind of person who can get to anyone
anywhere.

I look back over my shoulder and try not to laugh. Barry’s
eyes are wide and round. He looks down at his rough-and-tumble clothing and I can
practically read the thoughts running through his head.

He might be underdressed for the crowd, but as long as he is
with me, nobody will raise a fuss.

We take our seats and the hostess immediately encloses us
behind several paper walls. The privacy screens block our view, though if we
want, we can pull one of them aside and see everything.

They don’t block the gentle Asian music flowing through the
air or the soft hum of conversation. We might not be seen from the outside of
the screens but if we speak above a whisper, we can be heard.

This is exactly why I picked this place.

As if reading my mind, Barry shifts uncomfortably on his
cushion. “This is a pretty fancy place.”

He mutters it as if he’s unsure of what else to say. I can’t
hold in my laughter this time. He looks so uncomfortable and it’s the first
time I’ve seen him so out of his element. “It’s one of the
fanciest
places.”

He shrugs but before he can respond, there’s a tap at the
screen. “Come in.”

Our waitress is folded on the ground, her head respectfully
bowed when the screen slides to the side. She maintains that position for
several seconds before slowly lifting and presenting us with two menus. “Please
take all of the time you need. There is a buzzer at the end of your table. When
you are ready to order, simply push it and I shall return.”

The exotic lilt of her voice matches the rest of the décor
and I have to give credit where it’s due. She takes our drink orders—I decide
to be adventurous and order several bottles of flavored baijiu—and leaves
without another word.

Barry shudders. “That doesn’t freak you out?”

“Not really.” I glance over the menu and quickly decide what
I want to eat. I don’t need to spend too much time on it. I have other things
in mind. “It’s a form of art. She’s playing a role, which includes serving us.”

Barry shrugs, leaving me to believe that the artistic nature
of our meal has been lost on him. I try not to let it bother me, but it says
something about his ability to take on higher roles with me. For a second I
doubt my plan to mold him into someone comfortable in my world. Maybe it just isn’t
possible.

“Still, you must’ve put a lot of thought into this place. So
I’ll try not to let it weird me out.” Barry rubs a hand over his bald head and
rolls his big shoulders, as if he is getting ready to lift something heavy.
When he picks up the menu I realize what that load is for him. His eyes roll a
little as he takes in the prices.

“Don’t worry about ordering too much, “I say trying to get
him to relax. “This is my treat.”

Even though I said it before, I can tell he’s not completely
comfortable with the idea. I’m strangely pleased by his level of discomfort. I
never have to worry about Barry wanting me for my money. He wants to take care
of me, not the other way around.

After a few minutes, he closes his menu and looks up at me.
The smooth confidence in his expression lets me know that his moment of
uncertainty is over. He shifts back on his cushion, his long legs crowding me
in and taking up more room than they should.

For the first time this evening, his hot gaze roams over my
body. “I didn’t even realize how good you look tonight. Shame on me.”

He runs his tongue over his lips suggestively, never one to
waste words. His dark blue eyes touch the low neckline of my dress stroking my
breasts. My stomach does a turn and I suck in a heated breath. “I guess you’re
just going to have to make it up to me, aren’t you?”

Barry smiles and his straight white teeth seem almost like a
threat to me in the enclosed space. This is what I like the most about him. His
primal energy, his aggressive nature. Before I can even think of it, he reaches
across the short table and drags me up on the smooth surface. My breasts come
in contact with cold, hard wood and he continues to pull me until my mouth is
pressed up against his.

He kisses me until I am breathless, those sharp teeth
dragging against the sensitive skin of my bottom lip. He pays no mind to the
carefully mounted chopsticks in my hair, knocking them askew with his meaty
hands.

When there is a knock at the screen separating us from the
general population, he releases me with a rough yank and hisses. His husky
voice drops to a whisper. “I’ll do more than make it up to you.”

With shaky hands, I let my hair down and make sure my dress
is not revealing any more skin than it should be. My voice is weak and thready
when I finally give permission for the waitress to enter. I hadn’t even
realized that Barry pushed the button before he began kissing me. It seems he is
as turned on by the potential of an audience as I am.

“Hello again, Miss Opal.” The waitress says as another
server unloads a tray with our drinks, giving no indication that she had heard
our exchange. It’s “I am glad to take your order at any time.”

I have to clear my throat several times before I can tell
her what I want to eat. I select a noodle bowl as well as several lines of
sushi, which I no longer think will satisfy my hunger.

Barry orders steak, his voice smooth and steady as if he is
unaffected by what has just transpired.

Our drinks are spread out in front of us, bottles along with
tiny cups that hold a mouthful of liquid. The waitress and server leave quickly
and I barely manage to thank them because my focus is centered on Barry. He had
flashed his cocky smile at the woman when she entered but when she leaves, his
attention is focused solely on me. Just the way I like it.

“Take a drink, Fallon. Have you ever had baijiu before?”

I reach for the decorative bottle with shaky fingers and try
to take a breath to steady myself. I’m highly aware of the fact that there are
people surrounding our little room of privacy. If anything happens, we will
have indirect witnesses—one of my sexual weaknesses.

“I haven’t.” I respond as I pour the clear liquid into a
small glass. I wince at the smell alone. It smells like it’s going to taste
harsh but I try not to jump to any conclusions. I tip the glass to my lips and
immediately regret it.

The stark, cold taste makes me feel like I bit my tongue. I
immediately set the glass down and Barry laughs deeply.

“Not your cup of tea, huh?” I raise an eyebrow when he reaches
over and takes the cup. He pours it down his throat with one smooth motion,
smacking his lips. “Looks like this is just my kind of drink. Reminds me of
moonshine.”

I must have been making a face because Barry scoots closer
to me. “Moonshine is a little harsh for you, isn’t it? My delicate flower.”

The tiniest bit of annoyance flits through my system and I
shove at his shoulder. “Don’t call me that.”

Barry has the habit of treating me as if I’m some porcelain
doll. He doesn’t believe that I can handle the rougher stuff. It is funny when
you think about it. I have done kinky things that he wouldn’t even begin to
believe.

“Aww,” he whispers. He moves closer again, crowding me in
the small space. “Don’t be like that, baby. I’m sorry. Here, I’ll help you get
a taste for it.”

I twist away but he grabs me easily and holds me still as he
takes another long drag of the alcohol, straight from the bottle. Before I can
figure out what he’s planning, he runs his free hand along the silky material
of my dress. The warmth from his hands seeps through the fabric and sinks into
my breasts. I tilt my head back, the tiniest moan slipping free of my lips.

“Mmm.” He responds, sealing his mouth over mine. My
annoyance is forgotten as he presses against me, kneading my flesh with his
strong fingers. I part my lips and some of the alcohol trickles into my mouth,
warmed by his tongue.

The taste explodes in the back of my mouth and I arch my
back. It’s so much better this way and I’m not sure if that’s because of him or
because the alcohol needed to be heated up. Either way, I want more and I climb
into Barry’s lap, waiting impatiently while he takes another drink.

“More,” I command. He chuckles and hurries to obey my
command. The split in my dress lets me spread my legs wide and I feel his
erection pressing through the rough fabric of his jeans.

He pours more alcohol into my throat from his lips and I
grow lightheaded much more quickly than I expect. Baijiu is stronger than what
I’m used to and it makes me bolder than I usually would be.

I slide down his lap under the weight of his hands on my
shoulders. The friction as I move rubs against my panties, making my breathing
fast. The small space we’re in heats up and I feel sweat bead at my brow.

I straddle his knee and Barry releases my shoulders,
smoothing his hands down my back and up my neck. I bend so that my face is
inches from his crotch and the thick outline of his cock makes me lick my lips.

It would be so easy…

I press my mouth against the fabric of his jeans and blow a
hot breath into the area, bathing him in my breath. He groans and I pull back,
casting him a playful smile.

“You like that, huh?” My voice is husky and tight with my
arousal.

Barry pulls me back just a little and unbuttons his fly. The
sound of the teeth of his zipper separating makes my whole body jerk. “You know
that I like it.”

His cock springs away from his body and points at me. It is
almost as if his dick has a mind of its own and it wants me just as badly as
Barry does. I run my tongue over my bottom lip again, delighted by the evidence
of his need for me.

“Do it, darlin’.” His big hand pushes against the back of my
neck, bringing my face closer to his crotch. My heart pounds in my chest and I
open my lips wide taking in his girth. This sweet taste of him explodes in the
back of my throat, washing away the bitter harshness of the alcohol. I moan,
momentarily forgetting where we are.

“That’s right, do it just like I taught you.” His hands fist
in my hair even harder and I rock against his knee, trying to find relief for
the ache between my legs. I bob my head expertly, twisting the all of the right
places and he lets out a groan that tells me he doesn’t care who hears us.

Fear adds a dangerous edge to my arousal and I try to pull
back and away from him. Immediately, he grabs one of my breasts, tweaking the
nipple painfully. “I didn’t say you could stop.”

He whispers it, the hot reprimand sending shivers down my
body. Even though he could have been loud, he wasn’t. He keeps his hold on me,
preventing me from moving but he is gentle and respectful.

He is asking me to trust him.

For just a moment my mind blanks and I remember my time with
Giulia. She accused me of not being able to open up to people once before. And
earlier she had accused me of wasting my time with Barry. But I don’t want to
do that. I want to trust him, to give him whatever he wants.

I let him have this power over me, closing my eyes and
continuing to work his thick dick in my throat. I twist my head to the side
when I come up, delighting in the way his balls tighten under my chin when I
sink downward.

“Oh shit.” Barry hisses while he pumps his hips, fucking my
mouth. “I’m going to come.”

At hearing that, I pick up my pace slamming my nose against
his stomach in an effort to get him off. He tries to control my pace but I
shake off his hand, wanting to enjoy the end of my conquest.

Hot ropes of cum slam into the back of my throat as Barry
lets out a subdued pant-roar. His hand fists in my hair and he pulls me down as
deep as I can go.

Surprise makes me open even farther when Barry reaches down
with one of his hands and rips through the barrier of my panties. Those thick
digits are stuffed into my pussy before I can even pull up from his cock. He
keeps me wrapped around his dick while he pounds his fingers deep inside me. I’m
so close that he doesn’t even need to touch my clit before I’m shaking.

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