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Authors: Farrah Abraham

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BOOK: Love Through LimeLight
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The sounds of my moans are muffled by his cock. He keeps me
pushed down even as his dick softens and slips across my tongue.

“Come for me. Hard. Fast. Do it now, coat my fingers in your
sweet, sweet cream.”

His voice, the speed of his hands, the involuntary rock of
my hips against his knee, it all drives me crazy. I can’t keep my body from
going up in flames. The pleasure that laces my mind is dizzying. I come so hard
I see stars. My legs kick out and I vaguely hear the splash of liquid hitting
the surface of our table.

“Shh. Shh, good girl.” Barry strokes my hair as I come and
after a few moments I come back to earth, taking deep breaths through my nose.
Barry lets me up and I sit back on my cushion. I woodenly take another sip of
my drink without tasting it. All I taste is Barry.

He laughs a little bit. “So. How about that food?”

Chapter Four

 

“Fallon, I need you. Excuse us, gentlemen.” A smooth, deep
voice interrupts my conversation, effectively dismissing the wine mogul I’m
talking to.

I spin around and find my friend Johnni standing behind me.
He looks fantastic in a sleek black pinstripe suit and a magenta dress shirt.
Hints of the bright pink color accent the ensemble through the stitching and
his cufflinks. I grin at him. “Looking good, as always.”

He nods before taking my arm and turning, making a beeline
for the double doors in the cozy room. This gathering is filled with the rich
and famous. Dignitaries from New York’s highest echelons of power line each
wall, and several of them are jockeying for my attention.

As we move through the crowd, I signal to Arianna, who is
busy stuffing her face with hors d’oeuvres instead of mingling with the guests.
When she sees me, she busily shoves a plate of crab cakes into her bag and
gives me a thumbs up. It’s hard not to roll my eyes but I manage. Barely.

Johnni pulls me to the side in the crowded room, his dark
skin gleaming in the low light. I had been smiling, happy to see him but the
moment I hear that serious tone of his, the grin drops from my face.

“What’s going on?”

He doesn’t answer me immediately. We move through the
expansive gardens and I congratulate myself again for a job well done on
picking this venue. Parties like this are for networking and bragging. They
aren’t what I’m used to and they’re decisively less fun, but from a business
standpoint, they’re a great opportunity.

“Let me get right to the nit and grit of the situation…eventually.”
Johnni sits me down next to the lavish pool. It’s
mostly for show but right now it’s too cold to swim in even if the guests
wanted to. Still, it would be a nice backdrop to some of the evening activities
Arianna should be preparing for now.

The plastic furniture creaks as it
adjusts to my weight. The sound grates against my eardrums, just as painfully
as the silence that follows. I’ve known Johnni for years. He’s been with me through
some of my darkest times. He is the one person I trust more than anyone.

“Look, honey. You know how I feel
about this. We both benefit by these. But sometimes the things they say are
true.”

I sit up a little straighter,
patting his dark-skinned hand with mine. I get the feeling that whatever he’s
trying to tell me is hurting him as much as it hurts me. In this moment, all I
want to do with comfort my friend, who is obviously struggling with some kind
of secret. “Whatever it is, whatever you’ve learned, don’t worry about the
consequences. I trust you. I trust you more than I’ve ever trusted another
person.”

Johnni runs his hands through his
hair, letting out an exasperated breath. “I know you won’t lie to me or
anything; we learned that lesson the hard way. It’s just…I know that this is
going to be…difficult for you to hear.”

This time I roll my eyes. I’ve
heard so many negative things throughout the years and had so much mud slung my
way that I can’t really think of anything that would shatter me the way Johnni
seems to think his news will. I flash him my brightest smile, really mean it
this time. “Just give it to me straight. I’ll work it out once I know what’s
what.”

Johnni looks down at his hand where
mine is still resting on top of his. Some of the worry melts away from his
face, but his dark eyes are still cloudy with concern. That’s one of my
favorite things about Johnni. He’s always looking out for me, always worried
about my well-being and mental state. It’s one of the reasons he is someone I
can always count on.

“About a week ago, I heard through
the grapevine that there was a biker guy hanging around my sets.”

At the mention of a biker, I perk
up knowing he must be talking about Barry. Johnni is no great fan of Barry. He
thinks Barry is beneath me. But unlike Giulia, he supports my decision to keep
Barry around. “All right, and?”

“Rumor has it, he’s been hanging
around trying to get some action.”

I feel a frown crease my mouth
involuntarily. At first I don’t understand. The way Johnni winced as he choked
out the sentence him confuses me. “Are you talking about drugs? Because I know
for a fact, Barry is not interested in things like that. I don’t date druggies,
and I wouldn’t be with him if he were doing anything like that.”

Johnni’s face twists as if the
next words are painful for him to say. “No, Fallon. I mean that he’s looking
for
action
. Sex.”

I sit back against the chair and
try to keep my breathing even, forcing myself to take the news gracefully. So
there is a possibility that Barry is sleeping around on me. I let that news
sink in and fight against the hurt that bubbles up in my chest. But rumors are
not facts. Johnni must have something else to have come to me about it.

“Is there more to it?” I ask,
unsure if I want the answer.

“I had him followed. It’s true,
hon. He’s been sleeping with one of my models.”

Agony slams into my chest like a
physical blow and I suck in a violent breath, trying to keep a whimper from
escaping. Before I realize what is happening I’m shaking my head, trying to
scramble up so that I can leave. Johnni puts a hand on my shoulder keeping me
still. He knows I need to hear this, even though I don’t want to.

“Fallon, you need to hear it all.”

I shake my head even harder,
trying to dislodge his hand from my shoulder. My vision blurs and it takes me a
moment to realize that I can’t see because of the tears. “No, Johnni. Don’t. “

He pulls me tightly against his
chest and wraps his arms around me. “I didn’t want to tell you. You know that.
All I want is to protect you and make sure that you find your happy ending.
When I told you to kiss a few frogs, I never thought that you would tongue
wrestle a snake.”

I try to speak but the moment I
open my mouth sobs roll across my tongue. It’s not that I am in love with
Barry. Maybe I am but I haven’t had enough time to come to grips with it.
Really, I feel hurt and betrayed. Someone I trusted threw that trust back in my
face. I opened up to him and let him see the most vulnerable part of me. I put
faith in him when everyone around me was telling me that he wasn’t right for
me. For him to do this in the face of that… It’s more than I can take.

Johnni strokes my back for a few
minutes, waiting for me to catch my breath before he continues. “Are you
feeling a little better?”

I begin to calm again, reaching
deep and finding strength in the words of my old cheer coach. “When you need a
pity party, fully indulge for ten, and then you move on.”

It’s comforting to realize that
not all of my past lessons are negative. My ten-minute pity party lasts for
just that, and I wipe my tears away. “All right, tell me the rest.”

Johnni nods after giving me
another hug. I can tell that he’s proud of the way I’m handling the situation,
but he doesn’t let that stop him from telling me all that I need to know. “You
know what kind of projects I work on in the fashion industry. Think about it,
what kind of models do I use?”

I blink, trying to clear the rest
of the tears from my eyes. Johnni is one of the top celebrity sales reps for Peroig
Men’s Wear. I gasp, sucking in more air than I mean to and start coughing
violently. “Wha-what? You can…mean…”

Johnni pounds my back, trying to
get me to breathe easily again. “Yeah. Just…I don’t know what else to say. You
know exactly what I mean.”

My stomach twists but I bite my tongue to keep from bursting
into tears again. That won’t solve anything and I refuse to give Barry the
satisfaction of making my day any worse. I will deal with him later. “Look, let’s
talk about something else.”

Johnni pauses as if he’s unsure about my sudden change of
subject. I see him peer into me, judging if it is wise to let me switch in the
middle of something so emotional. I try to give him a sincere smile but I know
it looks brittle and weak. Like the rest of me.

“Please. Tell me how it’s going with you and Kyle. Didn’t
you say you had some news?”

“Yeah, but…”

“No buts. Spill. I could use some good news now and it’ll
take my mind off things while I sort it out in my head.”

Johnni sighs again. He runs his hands through his hair and I
smile. He is usually very careful about keeping his appearance immaculate. The
fact that he has willingly messed up his hair twice in one sitting is a
testament to his inner turmoil. Again the way he’s taking this news as if it
personally hurts him as well only makes me feel a little better. Like he’s
sharing some of the burden of my sadness. “Well, if you’re sure…”

I gesture for him to continue and he leans back, crossing
his ankles. It takes him a few moments but when he begins talking again, it’s
like nothing else bad has happened. He is his usual cheerful self and I appreciate
the effort he is going through for me. “Things are going great. I can’t even
begin to tell you how happy I am with this guy. I told you we met at a shoot,
right? Well, he’s actually the head of photography for Peroig.”

I raise an eyebrow. Peroig is one of the key photo studios
in the city. They have offices all over the world and anyone working there has
to be better than good. They have to be genius. “Whoa. You really know how to
land a big catch.”

Johnni laughs. “I wasn’t even fishing. In fact, he chased
me. Wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

I groan in sympathy for the Kyle. When Johnni sets his mind
to something, he can be pretty stubborn. And that includes when he says no to
something. I realize that Johnni has been dating this guy for almost a year and
I didn’t even know how they hooked up in the first place. Another frown creases
my mouth.

I’ve been so busy setting up my businesses and shaking off
the last of my old life that I’ve neglected my oldest and truest friend.

That’s unacceptable.

I brush my hair from my shoulder, sitting up so that I can
give Johnni my entire focus. My drama can wait. I want to give all of my
attention to this man. “So do you think you guys are ready for the next level?”

Johnni lets out a huff of air. “That’s just the thing. Kyle
wants to do it the way he does everything—decisively.”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, we’ve been talking about moving in together for a
while but he wants to do more than that.” He sucks in a deep breath as if
bracing himself for what he is about to say. I immediately tense up, knowing
that anything he has to fortify this much for will be mind-blowing.

“The suspense is killing me. Just spit it out!”

“He wants to get married and start the adoption process.”

“What?!” I jump out of my seat, nearly tackling Johnni in my
excitement. Johnni has always wanted a big family and if he’s serious about
this guy, this is huge news. I’m so happy for him I think my chest is going to
burst. “That’s fantastic!”

“F-Fallon! I can’t breathe.” I release my strangle hold on
my friend but only by a little bit. I give him a little room to breathe but
make sure he realizes that I absolutely want every single detail.

“Breathing is optional, unless you’re going to use that
precious time to tell me everything. And I mean everything.”

Johnni laughs and wraps me back up in his big arms. I feel
like a kid when he squeezes me back. “Okay. I’m going to tell you all of it.
But you better get comfortable, this may take a while.”

 

Several hours later I let myself back into my apartment and immediately
collapse onto my sofa. The modern decor of my place is soothing in the same way
as my office. Both of these places are built just for me to relax in. They’re
my safe zones.

In the silence of this place, I can let my guard down. I can
relax the walls I have built up to keep me safe.

I roll over onto my stomach, looking down at the hardwood
floors. Tears burn in my eyes again but I fight them off this time. Rub some
dirt in it, that’s what I always think when I get overwhelmed with pain. You
combat emotional attacks with action and the only way I can get through this is
by confronting what is causing me pain.

I’ve spent the last couple of hours talking to Johnni about
his plans and expectations with Kyle. I’m happy for him and not really jealous…but
I want that. I want the kind of security and trust he has with Kyle. At the end
of the day, that’s all that I’ve ever wanted. But I know I can’t get it with
Barry. Not after what I had learned today.

I dig my cellphone out of my purse and gather my thoughts. I
know exactly what I want to ask and if I don’t get the answers I want, I’m
done.

I dial Barry’s number and my heart rate kicks up with every
ring of the tone.

“Hey, sexy. Whatcha up to tonight?”

Barry’s voice strokes over my ears like a lullaby. In that
moment I realize how much of my hopes I have placed on him. I wanted something
that would last forever and I put myself out there, thinking that maybe he
could be that for me. But he isn’t.

“Are you gay?” I blurt out the question and from the stunned
silence on the other end of the line, I get my answer. Barry stammers for a
moment and even though my heart is breaking, I wait for him to recover so that
he can tell me whatever lie he’s got up his sleeve to explain this away. “W-what
are you talking about? You know that I’m not.”

I roll onto my back and stare up at my ceiling. “Fine. Bi,
then. Whatever. Are you sleeping with guys and then coming back to me?”

Pregnant silence. Barry’s sweating so much I can practically
hear the droplets landing on the receiver. “I don’t know what you’re talking
about.”

BOOK: Love Through LimeLight
10.72Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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