Shattered Heart (The Hart Series) (5 page)

“Have you
watched the news?  There was a hurricane that hit New York, Arianna!  You know,
the same New York where one of your top employees was located.  One would think
as an
illustrious
leader
, you’d want to know if he was okay.” 
Her brow shoots up as my words reverberate against the windows.  I cool my
temper and try to rein in the urge to reach over and choke her with her own
belt. 

“Just because we
aren’t together, doesn’t mean that I don’t care about him.  I just…there was no
way…I just needed to know he was okay,” I struggle.  This isn’t something I
should have to explain to her.  She doesn’t deserve the right to know why I
went to New York.  Nor does she need to know why I was at the hospital.  But,
because I want the hell out of this car, I continue to placate her.  “And as
far as last night, I didn’t even know he was back.  Did you?”  She contemplates
my explanation.  I sit, trying to pacify my frayed nerves by calmly twirling my
ring around my finger trying to settle myself.  “Besides, as soon as I got
confirmation he was okay, I came home.  And if you saw us last night, you’d
know it wasn’t a lover’s reunion.” 

 “I didn’t want
to do this, but you’re forcing my hand.  It’s clear you love him more than I
initially thought.”  She searches her purse and pulls out her phone; her finger
brush over her screen until she finds what she was looking for.  “You see,
there is this little video I have of Alex.  Let’s just say he’s being
very…naughty,” she giggles.  “See here?  If you look close enough you can
actually see the moment he penetrates her.” 
Did she just say penetrate? 
Don’t look at the screen, Ely…don’t look at the screen.

I can’t help it,
my eyes fall from her face to the phone turned in my direction.  The video
makes my stomach curl.  I can see a clear picture of Alex, naked, pushing into
a blonde whimpering with need.  And even though I’m one hundred percent positive
the man on the screen is Alex, the blonde is moaning a different name. 
“Oh…Calvin…”

I clutch my eyes
tightly and look away, hoping to subside the sobs fighting to break through. 
Arianna made her point.  The damage is done.  Irreversible.  I’ll forever be
haunted by the image of Alex with another woman.  Not only has she made her
point about Alex, she also verified the fact that she’s a sick and sadistic
bitch.  Seriously, why would she even have a video of him with another woman? 
And on her phone of all places.

Questions scrape
the corner of my mind, itching for me to ask, but not wanting to know the
answers. 
How old is the video?  Who is the woman?  Was this before me?

Once she
realizes I’m no longer watching she brings the phone closer and stops the moan
echoing from the speakerphone.

“How do you
think it would make Alex look if that video was released?  Even better, how do
you think the woman’s husband would react?”  A knot builds in my throat.  This
isn’t going to be good.  I knew I didn’t want to know the answers. 
“Considering he’s a prominent politician, I can see the headlines now.  God,
could you imagine the hell her husband would go through, and in return the hell
he would put Alex through?  Oh, and of course, it wouldn’t be good publicity for
SHI.  I would have to terminate him immediately.  Not to mention the fact that
his reputation would be ruined.  He’d be lucky to get the opportunity to ask,
do
you want fries with that,
at the local McDonalds after the senator was
through with him.”

I go to speak
and realize with utter astonishment that she isn’t done.  Damn it, I need to
get out of this car.  If I didn’t think she would make some sort of spectacle
outside of the car, I would leave. 

“What about his
poor grandmother?  All loony, she’d probably have to go into a state home. 
You’d be terrified to hear about some of the stories of what happens to women
in those types of facilities.  This story would not only damn the rest of her
days here on Earth, but you’d break her heart once she found out about his
past.  Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.  What a shame.”  She smiles a crooked smile while she
runs her fingers across her cleavage, stopping to rub the bronze pendant on her
necklace.

“Then again, he
could always return back to his roots.  I’m sure his stamina is as strong as I
remember.  Am I right?”  Arianna’s five seconds away from nudging me with her
elbow and trying to share sexual details.  You can practically see the hormones
radiating off of her at the mere memory of being with Alex.

I cover my face
with my hands hoping to shut out some of the pain being served on a silver
platter.  “I already told you I’m not with him.  What more do you want of me?”
I mumble through my hands.

“I need you to
hold up your end of the bargain!” she erupts, slamming her hands against my
dashboard as she inches closer to me.  “I don’t want to hurt you, but you’re
forcing my hand.  I even went out of my way and brought a perfectly good
replacement for you to fuck and get over your little infatuation with Alex.”

Oliver.
 

I’m so desperate
for this conversation to end and cringe knowing the only way it will is if I
molify the beast.  And just like he’s been the glue that’s held me together,
I’m about to use him some more.  He’s my hail-Mary, my only option to get out
of this situation.  “I’ve already started spending time with Oliver,” I admit
in defeat.

Arianna pauses
her rant and a Cheshire cat like smile spreads across her lips, causing my
teeth to grind.  She clasps her hands together in excitement.  “That is
incredible!  I knew you two would hit it off.  Of course, I’m not surprised at
my matchmaking skills!  Plus I
heard
he’s a stallion in the sack.”  I
really don’t want to stretch the truth any further about Oliver and I really
don’t want to talk about sex with Arianna. 

This has gone
too far.

This
conversation feels like a carnival ride.  Up and down, round and round; one
minute consumed with hatred and spouting off threats, the next relaying words
of hope as if she is Mother Freaking Theresa.  I don’t think my stomach can handle
any more of this ride.  “I really should be getting in.  I don’t want to be
late,” I mutter glumly, avoiding eye contact with her.

She nods
enthusiastically and opens the door and steps out.  “Oh, and Elyssa…”  She pops
her head back inside.  Turning, I look at her with an indifferent stare.  “I’ll
be watching you.”  I shiver.  Her final words hit me like a ton of bricks and I
grab my chest as she slams my door shut.

My nerves are
shot as I rest my forehead against the steering wheel.  I can’t seem to win. 
Even when I’m fighting against my own desires, I still end up on the losing
end.  I’m even more absolute in my decision to push Alex away. 

Note to self: Find a new parking
space. 

~~~~~

“Ely?  Hey, are
you okay?”  Janice’s sweet voice stirs me from my pity party.  Wiping away my
tears, I sit upright and plaster the fakest smile possible as I push away from
my keyboard.

“Just having a
rough day.  What’s up?”  Rough day is putting it gently.  I’m screwed.  I
realized that the second Arianna left my car, clutching my chest as if I was
having a heart attack. 

She bites her
cheek as she looks down at her shoes.  “I was going to give you a guilt trip,
but I can see this is probably not a good time.” 

“Guilt trip
about what?”  I look at her with confusion.

“I miss my
friend.”  Janice glares in the opposite direction.  “With your lunches occupied
by Oliver and your evenings filled by Arianna, I haven’t seen much of you.” 
Following her eyes, I see a casually dressed Oliver buried deep in his computer
screen, biting the end of his pen.  I smile.

“I’m sorry,
Janice.  Things have been off lately.” 
I’ve been off lately. 

“I know it
hasn’t been easy since
he
left, but you need to kick this funk you’ve
been in.”

“I know, I
know.  I’m trying.”  And, really I am.  Maybe not the way I should be, but hey,
I’m at work, aren’t I.  Give me some credit; at least I’m trying to function. 
But, she’s right.  And I do miss her and her positive nature.  “How about we
have lunch today?”

The moment the
words escape my lips, Janice beams with excitement.  “Really?” her singsong
voice rises to the highest octave possible.  “I’ve wanted to talk to you about
Kevin and…”  When she starts her happy ramblings, my brain officially checks
out.  I love her, I really do, but I’m broken and can’t bear her sappy words. 
I nod and smile.

“Hey Ely Bean,
we on for lunch?”  Oliver’s deep voice breaks Janice’s sputter of words as he
leans over my cubicle wall.  We both look at him, Janice scowling while I
smile.  He’s adorable with his light green eyes always showing his playfulness.
It’s hard to imagine the stallion Arianna described.  Not to say that he’s
lacking in that department, but then again, it’s just hearsay.  I think.

“
We
were
just discussing lunch,” Janice chimes in.

Just as I’m
about to cut the awkward building tension, I feel the hair on the back of my
neck rise.  “Where are we going for lunch?” Autumn pounces.  She’s been lurking
around Oliver enough the past few weeks, but hasn’t so much as peeped her toe
near me.  Can’t say she isn’t smart.  I’ve put off a “don’t talk to me today”
vibe for some time now.  From what Oliver tells me, she’s just as relentless as
he is.  I’m sure he shared this information in an effort to get a rise out of
me; unfortunately for him, my jealous trigger involves Alex.  Not Autumn.   

Oliver leans
over as he bites his bottom lip; his eyes moving from me to Janice, then to
Autumn, and back.  “Right…so, where
are
we going?” 

Moving her index
finger between the two of us, Janice shows her feisty side, the one she doesn’t
show too often.  “WE are going out to eat.  Sorry Autumn, can we do it another
day?  Elyssa and I need to discuss some personal things.”  Autumn shrugs and
backs away, but not before appreciating Oliver from the back, not really leaving
the group.

Oliver opens his
mouth to plead his case with Janice, but looks at me with pleading eyes.  “Oh
come on, Janice.  Can’t I tag along?  I promise to be on my best behavior.” 
Oliver stands back with a pout.  I giggle at his ridiculous attempt to win
Janice over and at his obvious attempt to ignore Autumn as she stands, batting
her long fake lashes at him.

“You know she
has a boyfriend, right?  You think he would be happy about you making googly
eyes at her all the time.”  My eyes widen at Janice’s forwardness.  Of course
she knows about my relationship with Alex; however, she’s not quite up to date
with the events that have transpired since he left.  She knows nothing about
how I’ve ignored his phone calls and texts or about my impromptu trip to New
York.  Dang.  I really have been neglecting our friendship.  The heaviness in
my heart right now is probably the first sign that I should confide in her,
even if it’s just little bit. 

To prove a
point, Oliver leans towards us with a sly smile, “I guess you’ve been out of
the loop, Janice.  Ely’s…well, she’s not with him anymore.  So no one should be
upset about my googly eyes.”  Oliver stands confidently, straightening his tie
and brushing off imaginary lint from the lapel of his jacket.  He looks handsome
in his business digs, but they don’t suit him.  He’s like a monkey in a suit; I
fight the urge to throw a pair of jeans and a t-shirt at him daily.  

Janice’s mouth
drops in shock as she quickly turns her head in my direction.  I can see it in
the way she’s looking at me, the full weight of what Oliver just spewed. 
Janice puts two and two together and correlates my moods from the past few
weeks with my recent relationship status change. 

“WE are
definitely having lunch
alone
today.”  Janice glowers before huffing in
Oliver’s direction as she strides back to her desk. 

Normally
Oliver’s smugness wouldn’t bother me, but right now I want to slap the smile
right off his face.  It’s irritating as I catch him watching Janice walk away. 
He really had no right to talk about my personal business.  “She doesn’t like
me very much, does she?” 

“She’s just
being my friend and looking out for me.  And, if you were doing the same, you
would’ve kept your mouth shut.”  Turning back to my computer I try to avoid any
further conversations with him.

 “Well, she
might not care for me, but I can see she’s a fan of your ex.”  I turn my head
in disbelief that he hasn’t walked away, and watch his mouth straighten into a
thin line as he glances in Janice’s direction.  “But it doesn’t matter anymore,
right?”  Oliver sighs in exasperation and pushes away from my cubicle wall.

~~~~~

I miss you.

Three
uncomplicated words.  Three words which cause an ache so deep inside me I feel
like I’m having a heart attack.  The last thing I expected to see adhered to my
front door is a bright yellow Post-It note; let alone those seemingly three
simple words written in Alex’s impeccable writing. 

Today has been a
disaster.  After getting nothing accomplished during my lunchtime talk with Janice,
and trying to work through my dull afternoon, I was just starting to think I
couldn’t feel any worse.  But now?  Now, I’m gutted.  I used to be a breathing,
tangible human being.  But with seemingly simple words like I miss you, I’m a
hollow shell of what I once was.  He misses me…even after everything I’ve done
to him, he misses me.