Sky Cowboy (4 page)

“Uh,” I stall.  I have no clue what to say.

“Why don’t we talk about how that kiss was the best I’ve ever had and I thought that maybe,
finally
, you were going to give me a fucking chance.  Then, the next thing I know, you’ve flown to bloody Paris without a second fucking thought.”

“Do you think this is really the time and place to have this conversation, Jeremy?” I ask.

That kiss was the best I’ve ever had. That was the best kiss I’ve ever had.
  His words repeat over and over in my mind.

“I’ve tried to do this elsewhere but you never give me a chance. 
You’re always cutting me off or making excuses.  Don’t you think it’s about time we sorted this shit out? You can’t tell me you don’t feel this connection between us, Ava.  I mean, fuck me, it’s been there all our lives!”  He roughly slides his hands through his hair, frustrated.

“I can’t do this right now, Jeremy.  I’m sorry.”  I quickly stand and, after grabbing my handbag, I walk away as fast as possible.  I hear him mutter a string of curses before he slams his fist on the table.

Shit.
  He’s right.  He has made attempts to talk about it before now, but I have always distracted him with something or cut him off.  The truth is, I don’t want to talk about it. 
If
we talk about it, then I will have to tell him that yeah, I feel the connection between us, but nothing will ever happen because he fucked my sister and I don’t ever want to be someone’s second best. 

I want
to be the first choice.  Is that too much to ask for? 

Four years later

“Ava?”  I hear my name being called.  I recognize the voice, but I wish I didn’t. 
Great.
  I sigh and then turn my head.

“Oh, Ava, it
is
you,” the girl chuckles, nervously.

“What do you want, Carrie?” I ask, bluntly.

Carrie McClymont-Banks is the Vice President of the First Class Bitch Association.  My sister is, of course, President.  Carrie’s parents, Joseph and June, own McClymont’s Accounting, here in Pine Creek.  Carrie married her high school sweetheart, Brendon Banks, and they moved to Darwin not long after leaving school.  Carrie and my sister had often made my life a living hell and I, for one, wasn’t sad to see her go.

“I just wanted a moment of your time,” she answers quietly.  She seems nervous and fidgety.  Not like Carrie at all.

“Well, you’ve got it.  I’ve just finished work, so we can sit out front, if you like.”

“Uh, perhaps we could talk somewhere more private.”  She looks around the room and bites her lip before turning her gaze back to me and shrugging her shoulders.

“O-kay.” I’m officially confused.  “Would you like a coffee?”

She nods and I quickly make us a cup each and lead her to a quiet booth in the corner.

“What’s the problem, Carrie?” I ask, hoping she’ll get straight to the point.

She takes a deep breathe. “Right.”  She sighs and then continues, “Firstly, I just want apologize for all I’ve ever said or done to you, Ava.”

I can’t help the scoff that escapes my lips.

“I really am, Ava.  Trust me.  I am
not
that kind of person, but your sister always had a way of being …
convincing.
  Anyways, that’s not why I’m here.”

“Why are you here, Carrie?”

“I want to set the record straight.  I know your sister has taunted you in the past with tales of her sleeping with Jeremy Henley.  I want you to know that it’s not true.  She never slept with him.  She tried. 
Believe me
, she tried.  But he was too drunk to even kiss her, let alone do anything else.  She’d been trying to get him to sleep with her for ages, but he never wanted her, not like that.  So one night when he was drunk, she tried to take advantage of him and it backfired.  You know what your sister is like, she was
pissed off
that he would never try anything on her, and then she was even more pissed off when he couldn’t get it up so she could shag him.”

I look at her with my eyebrows raised.  My head is spinning.  My sister, the conniving little bitch, lied about sleeping with Jeremy. 
Bitch!

“
Why are you telling me this, Carrie? I mean, you don’t really expect me to believe you, do you?  For all I know, this could be some grand scheme of my sister’s.”

“Ava, I’m being totally honest.  It’s no secret that you’ve always held a candle for Jeremy.  Honestly, I think he feels the same way about you.  I think that’s why he’d never sleep with Kennedy.  I know that when she couldn’t actually do the deed with him, she stripped both their
clothes off and climbed into bed beside him, so he probably
thinks
he slept with her – but he didn’t.”

“Okay, but that doesn’t explain why you’re here, now.  This happened years ago, Carrie.  Why are you telling me this now?”

“I owe her nothing.”  Carries spits her words out and clenches her teeth together.

What the hell!

“What’s going on, Carrie?”  I ask tentatively.

“Your sister is a piece of work, you know, Ava.  I’ve been best friends with her my whole life.  I’ve never once let her down.  But now,” she shakes her head, “Now, I’m done.  She slept with my husband.  She knows how much I love Brendon.  We’ve been together for years and she
knew
what he meant to me.  She didn’t care that he was my husband and that I was her best friend.  All she cared about was getting what she wanted, no matter the consequences.”  She starts to cry quietly.

“Oh, Carrie.  I’m sorry.”  I don’t know what else to s
ay.  I place my hand on hers in a gesture of comfort.

“I better go.”  She stands abruptly, and turns to leave.

“Wait.  Thank you.” I smile.

“No problem.  Like I said, I know you’ve got a thing for Jeremy, and I believe he has a thing for you.  Even when we were kids, I could see it.  You two are meant to be together.  Don’t let Kennedy’s lies hold you back, Ava.”  She says in parting.  Then she’s gone and I’m left alone with my thoughts. 
Seriously, does my sister know no boundaries?

I have no idea what to do with this new information.  I mean, what
can
I do?  Jeremy has made more attempts over the last few years to talk about what happened before I went overseas, but I’ve managed to dodge him each time.  Now though, I’m wondering if that was the best thing to do.

“Hello,” I answer my ringing phone in a daze, without looking at the caller ID.

“Ava, how ya doin’?”

“Hey
, Jeremy, I’m fine. Yourself?”

“Yeah, good.  Ah, listen I was just wondering if you would be able to watch Oscar for me tonight.  Something’s come up and I
gotta go out for a few hours.  Mum had him today to take him to speech therapy ‘cause I was out on a muster and I don’t want to bother her again.  You’re the only person I could think of…”

“It’s cool, Jeremy.  You don’t have to tell me your life story.  You know I love that little man.  I’ll look after him any day,” I chuckle.

“Sweet.  Is six okay with you?”

“Sure.  I’ll see you then.”

I press end and decide to go home.  I’m hoping I’ll have time to get a ride in and I’ve got to feed my animals.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.  There’s nothing like feeling the wind rush through your hair as you gallop on a horse.  “Giddy up,” I
give Sampson a tap on the ribs with my heel and he transitions from a trot to a canter.  We fly over the grassy paddock at full speed as I guide him up a hill and across until we reach the end.  “Whoa, boy.”  I pull him to a stop and give him a pat on the neck, ruffling his gorgeous, long mane.  I loosen the reigns and let him have a pick of grass while I gaze out over the land. 

This spot gives the most beautiful view of our Station.  Far off in the distance, if you know where to look, you can spot Sully Falls.  Sully’s is breathtaking.  The water runs all year round and it’s shrouded by thick ferns and luscious trees.  Up close, the noise of the rushing water is almost deafening, but it’s stunning.  Over to the left in the distance you can see giant ant hills and it has almost a desert
-like appearance.  It’s a stark contrast to the right, which is vivid green with pasture and shady native trees and bushes.  The Margaret River winds through our property as well, but because it’s full of crocodiles, it’s beautiful to look at but it’s not so good for swimming in!

My mind wanders to Jeremy as I look in the direction of his Station.  I can’t believe that Kennedy has been lying all this time.  If I take Carrie’s word for it, she’s never slept with Jeremy.  That changes things for me.  It allows
me to think that maybe something can happen between us now – if he still wants me.  I need to put a plan into action to win him over, but first I need to suck it up and ask him about what happened with Kennedy.

“Come on boy, let’s head back.”  I steer Sampson in the direction of home and let him lead us back in a leisurely trot.

By the time we arrive home, the sun is starting to go down.  I unsaddle him and feed him his hay and chaff, and then head inside to have a shower and get ready to go over to Jeremy’s.

“Where you off to, love?”  Dad asks as I grab a drink from the fridge. 

“Just over to Jeremy’s.  He’s got something on tonight so I’m minding Oscar.”

“Right.  Well, maybe you can take a little
something over and give it to Champ for me?”

“Sure.”  Dad has called Oscar, Champ, since he was born.

“Hang on a tic and I’ll grab it.”  Dad disappears off down the hall while I take a sip of my water.  “Here it is.”  He hands me a Thomas the Tank Engine train before continuing, “Tell him, if he presses the chimney, it’ll make the train scoot along the ground.  I picked it up when I was in Darwin the other day.”

“Dad, you went to Darwin to get chemicals,” I remind him.

He looks away guiltily.

“So, how did you end up in a toy store?”
I press.

“It was next door.  I had to wait around a bit and I thought I’d kill some time,” he explains quickly.

“I’ve been to Darwin before, dad.  I’ve been there to buy the chemicals, and I’ve even been to the toy store, so I know where they’re located,” I smile huge because I know I’ve got him.

“Alright!  Alright.  You got me.  Jeez, Ava, I spent most of my life dreaming that one of my girls would marry one of those boys and give me a grandbaby just like Champ.  I can’t help wishing he was my grandkid
.  So if I’m in Darwin and I want to buy him a damn Thomas train, then I bloody well will,” he admits, indignantly.

“You mean Kennedy,” I correct.

“Kennedy?”

“Yeah, you’ve spent most of your life dreaming that
Kennedy
would marry one of the Henley boys.”

“Where did you get that idea from,” he frowns at me.

“Uh, dad, in case you haven’t noticed, I’ve sat at that table and watched you and mum practically force Kennedy down their throats.”

“Ava, love, that wasn’t our idea.  Kennedy told us all about how you didn’t like them.  We didn’t want to make you uncomfortable, is
all.  She thought it would be a good idea if we just let you be, didn’t try and push you into anything.”

“Wow.”  I don’t have a clue what else to say.  Fuck, my sister is a piece of work.  Perhaps she needs an exorcism or something…

“We only want you to be happy, sweetie.  We want you to find someone
you
want to be with.  Not someone your mother and I want you to be with.  Not big on the whole arranged marriages thing, you know?”

“Yeah, daddy.  I know.” I say quietly.

“Saying that though, I know you’ve recently had a thing for Jeremy, and I know that he’s had a thing for you.  Probably for longer than you’ve had a thing for him.”

Guess nothing escapes my father.  “Yeah.”

“I’m guessing, because I know what kind of girl I raised, you’ll have no problem taking that boy on as your own.”

I nod in agreement.  “I love Oscar as if he were my own anyways, daddy.”

“I know you do,” my father whispers gently.  “I know you do.”  Pulling me into his arms, he hugs me tight.  Then he lets me go and says gruffly, “Love you, Ava.  Now go.  And don’t forget the train.”

Picking up the train, I grab my handbag and make my way over to Jeremy’s.  Oscar was diagnosed with Autism when he was four.
  It was a difficult few years for Jeremy before he was diagnosed, but now that he’s had speech and occupational therapy, things are becoming a little easier. 

Jeremy or his mum usually take him t
o a special Autism and Asperger workshop in Darwin once a month as well, which has helped tremendously.  I’m not entirely sure what they do there, but Jeremy has told me that they give him tools to help Oscar and show Jeremy different remedies that may help Oscar overcome a meltdown when he has them.  They also do sensory play with Oscar.  He’s come such a long way in the last year. 

Thomas the Tank Engine is Oscar’s
special interest of choice.  He
loves
Thomas.  I mean really
loves
Thomas.  So much so, you could almost say his life
revolves
around Thomas.  He has other little quirks as well.  He likes to put his trains in lines and they must be the same way each time, and they’re colour coordinated, as well.  He lines up all the red ones, and then all the green ones and so on.  He can’t have the different colours mixed together, otherwise it upsets him too much. Oscar likes to spell words out – names, items, places. He also doesn’t like crowded spaces, which is fine out in these parts because it’s never over populated!