The Prince of Punk Rock (65 page)

“Go back to Chateau Marmont and
talk to Angel and Tommy.
 
It’s not like
they were cheating on you,” Alyssa pointed out.

“I know it’s not the same thing,
but is it much different?
 
They have a
life that I’m not part of.
 
I’ve
sacrificed a lot so that Tommy and Angel could be together.
 
I’m not complaining. I don’t have any regrets
and I wouldn’t change anything, but they share a fetish that doesn’t include
me.”

Alyssa’s mouth softened under the
harsh ruby red lipstick.
 
“What are you
going to do?”

“I don’t know.
 
I’m angrier at Angel than I’ve ever been at
anyone in my life.
 
I resent him, Alyssa,
for offering Tommy something I can’t.”
 
She leaned forward for emphasis.
 
“And if I can’t get past that, I don’t know what’s going to happen to
us.”

“Don’t you still love him?”

She covered her eyes with her
hands. She had a pounding headache. Too many conflicting thoughts were
hammering inside her head and ripping her heart apart.
 
She let out a deep sigh.
 
“Of course, I still love Angel, but I don’t
like him very much right now.
 
He made me
feel threatened.
 
And he hurt Tommy,
physically.
 
It was awful, and I don’t
know if I can forgive him for that.”

 
“Wait a minute.”
 
Alyssa flipped her long black hair back. “Are
they into BDSM?
 
Is that what this is
about?”

Jessi half shrugged. “Maybe.
 
I’m not sure what you call it.”

“Pain can be very exciting.
 
The rush of endorphins are a real turn
on.
 
What did he do?”

Jessi was hesitant about explaining
what she saw on the DVD and didn’t answer.

“Did he shove a urethral sound in
his dick?”

Jessi jerked back.
 
“What? No!”

“Did he use a ball vice?”

“No! I don’t even know what that
is.”

“What are you getting all worked up
about then, anal beads?”

Alyssa’s knowledge of hardcore sex
toys caught Jessi by surprise. Even though her friend walked around dressed
like a dominatrix on a daily basis, she never envisioned that Alyssa’s aesthetic
transcended into the bedroom.

Alyssa laughed. “You should see
your face.
 
I never knew that Jessi Blade,
involved in a steady ménage à trois with two of the hottest guys in rock and
roll, was so vanilla.”

“I just never heard of those things
before and I didn’t know my best friend was such an expert.
 
These last few days have been very
enlightening.
 
I didn’t know I was
sexually uneducated.”

“So what exactly did you see on
this DVD that was so bad, if it wasn’t anything hardcore?”

Compared to the things Alyssa just
described – nothing. “Angel hit Tommy.”

“You mean like, punched him and
beat him up?”

“No!
 
Nothing like that.
 
He was using that thing.”
 
She made a whipping motion with her wrist.

“A flogger?”

“Yeah.
 
A flogger.
 
Angel hit Tommy with a flogger.”

“That’s it?”

“Well . . . yeah, but it was
difficult to watch.
 
There were bright
red marks on Tommy’s back.”
 
The memory
made her cringe.
 
“He has such beautiful
cream colored skin and it’s velvety soft.
 
I wanted to jump through the computer screen and pull that thing out of
Angel’s hand.
 
And hit
him
with
it.
 
See how
he
liked it.”

“He might have liked it a lot. I’m
a piercer, Jessi.
 
I pierce a lotta
dicks.
 
Do you know what a
Prince Albert
is?”

Jessi heard of it, but she wasn’t
really sure what it was.
 
She gave an
unconvincing nod.

“It’s a piercing on the tip of the
penis, through the urethra and the sensitive underside of the head.
 
Sounds really painful, right? Well, every
once in a while a guy has an orgasm when I pierce it.
 
Damien did, practically the second the needle
hit his flesh.”

“Damien has his dick pierced?”

“Yeah.
 
And his scrotum and his nipples.
 
Damien likes pain.”
 
An evil smile spread across her blood red
lips. “And I like to give it to him.”

Jessi wondered how the hell they
got on the subject of Damien’s dick and balls.
 
She covered her ears with her hands. “I don’t want to hear any more
about Damien’s penis.”

Alyssa crossed her legs and played
with the zipper on her leather boot.
 
“Watch the video one more time.
 
I
bet you’ll find it’s not so bad after all, now that the initial shock has worn
off.”

Jessi told herself she wasn’t going
to play the video again, but she found herself popping it into her laptop as
soon as Alyssa left.

The sight of Tommy shackled to the
bed made her heart sink.
 
He looked
helpless, but maybe that was the point.
 
Enter Angel, the man who made her life hell . . . and heaven.
 
She felt each stroke of the sharp leather
against Tommy’s perfect skin and winced as each welt rose on his flesh.
 
His beautiful long blond hair, yanked back harshly
in Angel’s fist, made her angry and she yearned to protect him.
 
She couldn’t watch anymore and hit pause.

She wiped the tears that streamed
down her cheeks, and wondered how she was supposed to get past the brutality.
She advanced the video, past the flogging.
 
That damn ball gag was no longer in his mouth.
 
She didn’t notice that the first time.
 
Nor did she realize that Tommy was on his
back now, so he and Angel could make eye contact and watch each other. He was
still handcuffed and his arms, spread wide apart, accentuated his muscular
chest.

Angel had his fingers inside Tommy.
 
First one, then two.
 
He squeezed more lube and twisted his fingers
in a circular motion.
 
She envisioned
Angel’s fingers finding the spot that made Tommy weaken – the spot she knew
intimately.
 
A third finger tried to make
its entrance, but Tommy jerked.
 
Angel
was watching him and paused.
 
He waited
for Tommy to take a few deep breaths and nod, before he continued.
 
Angel’s hand was on the move again, plunging
deep into Tommy’s body.
 
His face had the
glow of ecstasy that she knew so well.
 
His gorgeous hair was fanned out on the pillow around him like a
magnificent halo.
 
That was the scene her
fantasies were made of – Angel pleasing Tommy.
 
This part of the video wasn’t violent.
 
It was the first part that she couldn’t erase from her mind.
 
Rough sex was OK, pain wasn’t.

She closed her laptop and stared at
the painting on the wall.
 
It was a
landscape.
 
An English garden.
 
It looked like it was under water, blurry and
distorted.
 
Then the tears rolled down
her cheeks and they wouldn’t stop.

Jessi woke early the next
morning.
 
It was going to be a busy
day.
 
The band was performing at the
Pacific Amphitheater in
Costa Mesa
, about an
hour south of
L.A.
 
It was a big show and everything went wrong,
which was probably a good thing.
 
It
meant she was busy and didn’t have time to hang around sound check or in the
dressing room.
 
She was purposely
avoiding Tommy and Angel.

Not only was she 30 minutes late
because she had to wait for the cleaners to find the dancers’ costumes, but the
tour bus driver had a case of food poisoning and she needed to get a
replacement at the last minute to drive the band to the venue.
 
By the time she got there and checked in with
Marissa and the production manager to firm up any loose ends, there was only
about an hour left before the show started.

The dressing room was busy with
people, so she kept herself occupied by having unnecessary conversations with
the stage hands and the production crew.
 
She felt Tommy’s presence bearing down on her, but refused to look in
his direction.

His hand on her arm made the hair
on the back of her neck stand up. “I missed you, hon.
 
Why didn’t you take my calls?”

The piece of lint on the carpet
held her attention.
 
“I’m sorry. I . . .
I didn’t know what to say to you.”

“How about, I love you, or, I miss
you?”

She finally looked up at him.
 
The day old razor stubble on his chin made
its first public appearance.
 
It was a
shade darker than his fair blond locks and sexy as hell.
 
Her fingertips grazed the soft tidbits of
hair on his face.
 
Tommy pressed his lips
into the palm of her hand and left them there.
 
She swallowed and tried to control the tremor in her lower lip.

Tommy took her hand from his cheek
and held it.
 
He caressed it in both his
hands.
 
He stared down at it and was
quiet for a long time.
 
“Did you get to
go to the fair at all today?”

That was the plan before the last
few days were shattered by the sordid content of the DVD.
 
They were supposed to spend the morning at
the Orange County Fair, known for its deep fried aberrations and bacon-covered
everything. “No. I was too busy.
 
Did
you?”

“Just for a little bit.”

Their conversation was contrived
and strained, but their eyes were glued on their interlocking hands.

“Are you all set for the show?
 
Do you have your guitar straps?” He was
always changing them and always misplacing them.

“Yeah. I just need one more
thing.
 
I need my wife back.”

She looked up at him.
 
His powerful gaze held her motionless.

“I want you to come back to Chateau
Marmont with us after the show.”