The Road To Forgiveness (6 page)

“I’m okay. I have a headache though,” I say
as I see the curtain open in front of me. In walks Sebastian
followed by my mother and Jonathon. Sebastian rushes to my side and
starts to caress my hair.

“Thank God you’re awake. You scared the shit
out of me. One minute we’re talking and the next minute you’re
passed out in my arms on the bed.”

I look into his eyes and see concern pouring
through them. He is worried about me. I glance over to my mother
who is looking adorably at Sebastian and then Jonathon who is
smirking at me. Enjoying every minute of the show, I’m sure.

“I’m okay. I don’t know why I passed out but
I’ll be fine. How long have I been out?” I ask. It feels like I was
just arguing with him a few minutes ago.

“It’s three in the afternoon. We’ve been here
for seven hours,” Sebastian says as he moves his mouth to gently
kiss my forehead before he continues to caress my hair.

“Yeah, baby girl. Sebastian called me from
the ambulance. Scared me half to death. First, you don’t come home
and don’t call, and then I’m getting a call the next morning saying
you past out and are on your way to the hospital. I can’t handle
this kind of drama. You need to take better care of yourself… and
it wouldn’t hurt to give me a call and let me know when you aren’t
coming home.” He lifts his palms in defense to me, “I’m just
saying.”

I laugh at this but the movement causes a
sharp pain in my head. I shoot another look to my mother. She looks
relieved but scared at the same time.

“How are you, Momma? I hope I didn’t scare
you too much.”

“Oh, darling, I wasn’t too scared. I knew you
would be okay. It’s just hard to be here, at this hospital, that’s
all.” She looks defeated. She was fighting some demons, the same
ones I was fighting.

I was lying in County, the only hospital
within a reasonable distance from where we lived. The hospital
where Miles was announced dead.

“I’m sorry. I really am but I’m fine, I
swear. We’ll be out of here as soon as you know it. Isn’t that
right, Doctor?” The old man is writing on my chart and he looks up
sharply as I call for him.

“It’s Doctor Reynolds and that’s half true.
You should be able to leave today but you are not fine. Would you
like to speak in private or is it okay to talk in front of everyone
here?”

Shit. What could be wrong with me? I want to
kick everyone out but I know my mother won’t leave without a fight,
Jonathon will want to stay just to be dramatic, and Sebastian won’t
leave if everyone else gets to stay.

Without thinking, I nod my head in
encouragement for the doctor to continue. The fact that I’m
pregnant doesn’t even cross my mind. It never occurs to me that
this could have anything to do with the pregnancy.

“I ran some tests and did some blood work and
it looks like you are in the early stages of toxemia. Your blood
pressure is high and you are showing high levels of protein in your
urine. It’s still a little early to tell. You’re what, eight or
nine weeks along? We’ll have to continue monitoring you but I am
going to ask you to stay in bed until you see me next. Bed rest is
the best way to get control of this thing before it gets worse.
We’ll monitor you and take you off bed rest if everything goes
well.”

Oh, no. Oh no, Oh no, Oh no.

This has to do with the baby. The baby that
was supposed to be kept a secret. The baby, which my mother and
Sebastian didn’t know about.

Maybe they didn’t catch it. Sebastian won’t
know what toxemia is and my mother is such a mess it could be
possible she didn’t put it together. I look up and see my mother’s
expression. She knows.

Fuck.

I look over to Sebastian and my worst fears
are confirmed. He knows… and he looks pissed.

The doctor continues to speak but I don’t
hear any of it. My eyes are locked on Sebastian’s. The intensity
from his stare is almost too much to take but I can’t turn away.
Its like I am bound by his blue eyes and won’t be released until he
looks away. I don’t know what to say. I’m not sure I could speak
even if I wanted too. This changes everything.

“Do you think you can do that, Ms.
Dechino?”

The trance is broken as Sebastian and I both
look to Dr. Reynolds.

“Huh?” I ask because I didn’t catch what he
said the first time.

“Do you think you can handle being on bed
rest for the next two weeks? I can see you the day after Christmas
but you need to stay in bed until I do. I’ll have a nurse come in
with instructions on your care but I can only release you if you
promise to follow the treatment plan and stay off your feet.”

Before I can even answer him Sebastian is
talking.

“She will do whatever you say, Doctor. I want
to take all precautions when it comes to my baby. I’ll make sure
she follows your orders.”

Sebastian exaggerated the MY, in my baby. I
watch him as he continues to talk with the doctor. To everyone else
in the room he seems like a concerned father. I’m sure he is
concerned but I can also feel the chill in the room. The chill that
is coming from the man beside me.

The doctor leaves the room as the nurse walks
in and starts to remove the IV and tubes from my arm. She hands my
mother paperwork to fill out and Sebastian asks her a few questions
before she dismisses us and leaves the room.

No one has spoken since the doctor left the
room so I am thankful when Jonathon breaks the silence.

“I don’t know about all y’all but I’m
starving. All this drama makes me feel like I’m watching a movie
but forgot to stop at the concession stand before I sat down in my
seat. Who wants to stop at
Krystal
in Hinesville and get
some Kryspers, Pups, and Sliders?”

It’s times like these that make me love
Jonathon even more. I’m actually really hungry so food sounds
perfect right now and I would do anything to keep the conversation
off the news that was just released.

“That sounds great. I haven’t eaten a real
meal since lunch with you, Momma. I know
Krystal
isn’t
exactly healthy but it will hit the spot.”

My mother smiles at me and nods her head,
“Okay,
Kryst
al it is.” She looks over at Sebastian, “Do you
want to come to Krystal with us, Sebastian?”

Sebastian doesn’t say anything at first. My
emotions are everywhere and I’m ready to burst into tears at his
silence. He stopped touching me the minute the doctor told everyone
I was pregnant and he is purposely avoiding eye contact with me
now. In fact, he hasn’t looked at me since the doctor left the
room.

Just as I am convinced he is going to ignore
my momma…

“I think Krystal sounds great. I’ve been with
Mia since last night so I know she needs some food in her stomach,
but I don’t think it is a good idea to dine in. Mia needs to be on
bed rest. Why don’t I take her back to my hotel? You both can pick
up the food and meet me us there.”

Sebastian says this, all the while not
looking at me and acting like I’m a five-year-old child who doesn’t
have a say in what she does. I can’t complain though, I’m agreeing
with him to the fact that I shouldn’t dine in. I want a healthy
baby so I need to follow the doctor’s orders.

Sebastian and me, alone right now, isn’t a
good idea. If it wasn’t for the fact I was carrying his baby, I’m
sure I would be in a body bag on the side of the road by
dinnertime. Ironically, the entire reason he is mad is because of
the baby.

Go figure.

My mother agrees with Sebastian and so does
Jonathon. I can tell Jonathon is worried for me but what can he do?
I did this to myself and now I have to deal with the
consequences.

Everyone waits out in the hallway as I change
back into my clothing. I try to take my time but it will only stall
the inevitable. I have to have an uncomfortable conversation with
Sebastian that I don’t want to have.

When he realizes that he is going to be a
part of the baby’s life, maybe he’ll forgive me. I never intended
for him not to know. I always planned on him playing an active
role.

Once I’m dressed, I meet everyone out in the
hallway and we exit the emergency room of the County Hospital.
Sebastian gives my mother the name of the hotel and room number,
and then we go our separate ways. We make it to the Mercedes and
Sebastian opens my door for me to get in. He still hasn’t said a
word to me or looked at me. I can’t handle the rejection but I mask
my feelings and get in the car. I thank the Lord that I won’t be
alone with him for too long.

The drive to the hotel took fifteen minutes
from the hospital. It seemed like hours. Sebastian still hasn’t
spoken to me and the silence is defining. In this moment I want to
run. I want to do whatever I can to avoid the conversation we are
going to have once he decides to speak to me.

The reality of the situation is, I can’t run.
I’m an adult and I need to start taking responsibility for my
actions. I need to stop running.

I take a few deep breaths and try to figure
out what I’m going to say to him. Where I should start. I want him
to understand where I’m coming from. I want him to understand that
I’m scared shitless and running was the only thing I knew to
do.

By the time we pull into the hotel parking
lot I still haven’t decided what to say. We get out of the car and
head into the hotel. Sebastian exchanges pleasantries with the
doorman and then whisks us off to the elevators.

The elevator feels like an eight by eight
cell with the tension radiating off Sebastian’s body. We get off on
his floor and go to Sebastian’s room. I’m preparing myself for his
wrath as he closes the door to the room after we walk in. What I
don’t expect is the desire I see in his eyes as he turns toward me.
My eyes meet his and in two steps our mouths are on each other
while our hands grab onto whatever they can reach.

I can’t get close enough to him. It’s not a
sweet, intimate kiss. It’s rough, angry, can’t get enough of each
other, all out battle of a kiss. I’m instantly wet and my body is
quickly reminding me of the orgasm it was denied earlier today.
Sebastian’s lips are hard on mine and I respond to him roughly
back. His lips move down my neck, nipping and licking on their
path. I feel a chill run over my body yet his lips leave a heated
sensation on my skin

My hand moves to the front of his jeans and
gropes his already hard erection. I need him right now. It’s fast…
quick… and messy. One minute we're kissing the next minute I’m
being pushed onto the bed and Sebastian is undoing his jeans. He
drops them to the floor as I pull my own jeans off. Sebastian sits
on the bed, pulls me over to him, and lowers me onto his cock.

I can feel him hit me so deep and it feels
amazing. We are both completely clothed from the waist up, but I
don’t care. I haven’t been with him in weeks and my body will take
whatever it can get.

He grabs hold of my hips and starts moving me
at a fast pace up and down his erection. My eyes close as I start
breathing harder and faster. I’m so turned on right now I might
explode. His lips move down my neck and straight to my breasts. His
mouth starts to suck on my nipple as one of his hands moves up from
my hip to cup my other breast. With every squeeze and lick I feel
my body react. My core starts to pulse and I feel my orgasm take
over. I release hard and fast on Sebastian as he continues to pump
inside of me. I’ve never come so hard in my life. Sebastian lets
out a groan from deep in his chest as I feel him come inside me
seconds later. I’m still coming down from my orgasm as my pussy
milks him dry.

Our breathing starts to slow down as my mind
starts to work again.

We just fucked each other for different
reasons. I took him because I couldn’t hide my desire for him
anymore. He screwed me because he was angry. I’m waiting for him to
get up and walk away, yell at me, or tell me he hates me. Instead
he rolls me over and starts to kiss me slowly, lovingly. Every
caress his lips give to mine express unspoken words. I love you… I
miss you… I need you.

We kiss slowly for a long time, neither one
of us willing to break the moment.

“We need to get,” he kisses my chin,
“dressed,” he kisses my neck, “before your mom and Jonathon get
back.” He kisses back up to my mouth and bites my lip gently.

“Okay,” I breathe as my tongue darts out to
lick his lips.

He brakes contact and moves off the bed. He
quickly pulls his boxer briefs and jeans up. Then he tosses me my
panties and jeans for me to get dressed. Once we are both decent he
walks over to me and kisses my forehead.

I’m sure what we just did would not qualify
as bed rest… but I did at least listen to the doctor and commit to
the bed.

“We need to talk about what happened at the
hospital,” Sebastian’s says calmly, which terrifies me in a
completely different way.

“I know but I don’t want to talk with an
audience around us. Can we talk tonight, when everyone leaves?”

Before he can answer there is a knock at the
door indicating my mother and Jonathan are back. Sebastian nods his
head to me in silent agreement and goes to answer the door.

“Can you believe we had to wait fifteen
minutes for our food? People, it’s called FAST food for a reason.
If I wanted to wait fifteen minutes for food I would have eaten
somewhere that didn’t up my risk of a heart attack by the age of
forty,” Jonathon says as he bursts through the door, carrying bags
from
Krystal.

My mother trails behind him with the drinks
and we sit down at the small table the suite has to offer. Jonathon
starts handing the same order to everyone.

“You all better eat what I give you. No one
gave me their order and we didn’t sit and wait an eternity for you
not to eat your food.” I hold back a laugh at Jonathon’s ridiculous
comments but I see Sebastian smile from the corner of my eye.