Breathe With Me (The Breathe Series Book 3) (10 page)

My brows knit and my heart grips as I watch him, still unable to speak, unable to piece together anything that has happened, unable and absolutely unwilling to believe any of it. Why? I want to say it; I want to, but my lips have cemented closed and I have no doubt if they could open that I would no longer recognize my own voice.

“You…” his voice startles me and I grasp my suit and step back as a strangled sob fills the air.

I look down quickly, tugging the hem of my shirt down more as if I can make it longer, but I soon realize the cry did not come from me. In fact, no tears fall; I’m in shock, stunned and silent.

Trent moves and I snap my head up to see him looking right at my face. Shadows from the outside trees dance across his face, and it’s then that I can make out the pain in his expression. The soft playful happiness he usually carries around is gone. It’s replaced with torment and grief, possibly even shame or remorse. I hate him.

“You passed out I think or fell asleep…”

This confuses me. My brows dip lower and I snarl my lip, a tightness forming over the bridge of my nose as it crinkles with my glare.

“A while ago,” he elaborates as if he can read my thoughts. “You were breathing so heavy and fast and then you just stopped. I thought you were dead. I thought maybe I…”

His hand pulls back up in a stretch to reach for me. I cock my head back and my eyebrows dart up as my eyes widen.

“Don’t touch me,” I hiss out before I can think.

He gasps. “I’m sorry. Please,” his words come out in a raspy plea. “I just thought that maybe,” he pauses, looking down in shame.

He should be ashamed. Venom courses through me and it’s the first time in my life that I’ve felt such a foreign emotion; something so cold and vicious, but it surrounds me, it sinks through my skin and rushes through my veins, filling my heart and mind with one thought. I hate him.

“I thought that maybe it would feel different…” he looks back up at me and my heart stops. The last thing I want to feel is the pain that is in his voice. “I thought with you, it might feel…”

I suck in a startled breath and spin around, not wanting to listen; sickened by what he wants to feel or hoped to feel. Flying to the door, I don’t wait, I don’t even grab for my shorts; I just run, grabbing the ties that brush across my leg into my hand so that my suit doesn’t fall to my ankles.

My hand falls on the door knob and I tug at it before looking back. I stumble forward when I’m met with zero give and quickly see the deadbolt that Dad installed last summer is twisted sideways; locked. My fingers fumble clumsily as if I am trying to escape from a crazed serial killer; escape is absolute. I snap it to the side and fling the door open with such force that it thuds against the wall. I don’t even care if Mom and Dad wake up, as long as I am gone.

“Piper, wait,” Trent whispers as the mattress creaks behind me. “Piper…”

I run out the door, my feet shaky and unstable, my mind a wreck of images and sounds that I cannot shove aside and my body still crawls with the heat of his breaths on my neck and the touch of his hand on my hip.

I want to forget that it ever happened.

Forget how it felt; erase every dirty detail of this night.

Just forget it all.

ONCE BACK INSIDE MY COZY
little hideaway, I drag myself towards my bed with a shiver. My eyes skim over my thick comforter before settling on the small metal radiator between the bed and table. Running my hand a few inches above it, I let out a frustrated breath and drop my hand onto the smooth surface.
Great.
It’s warm, but no doubt it is going out. Squatting down onto the balls of my feet, I turn the heating knob just a couple of notches to high and hope that it starts cranking out some heat soon.
I hate being cold. I may not complain about much, but I am a pansy when it comes to cold weather.

Clasping the fabric of my shirt at the back of my neck, I pull it off in one swift motion and quickly grab the sweatshirt that’s wadded up at the bottom of my bed. After pulling on an old pair of gym pants, I slide under the warmth of my blankets and settle in for the night with the springs in my worn out mattress digging into my back. I’m due for a new one, but this bed holds way too many memories; carefree, adolescent fun along with more intimate moments when I got older.

Reaching behind my head, my stomach tightens as I lift my upper body until I find the only thing I have left from all those memories. I pull out a picture of Piper that I’ve held onto since the second she gave it to me back in the ninth grade. At the time, it seemed like such a small deed, exchanging pictures, but now as I look back, I remember the huge smile she had on her face as she handed it over. I can still see the nervousness in her eyes as I grabbed it and then handed back one of me. Her skipping away with my picture in her hand should have told me right then how much that little gesture did and how she felt about me. Nonetheless, her picture went up beside my bed that night and has remained there, up until earlier today at least.

Flipping my finger along the dog-eared edge that bent one time or another from my excessive obsession of looking at it, I think over everything that was said earlier. Not a damn thing was resolved and nothing was put behind us, but the hostility in her voice dulled; it was drowned out by something else.
Is it even possible that she has missed me too?

Quickly dismissing that thought, I slide the picture back to its normal resting place in a seam on the wall, careful to not bend or damage it any more. I’m sure it’s the last picture I’ll have of her. Reaching up, I turn off the light above my head and twist to get more comfortable, sliding one hand under the pillow and the other resting above it in front of my face. Sliding my eyes closed, I breathe out slowly, releasing any unsettling thoughts and worries until my mind is empty and focused on absolutely nothing.

Tap…Tap.

My eyes spring open at the unexpected disruption and my heart slams in my chest with a windstorm of nostalgia. Up on my sock feet, I trip over my shoes and stumble to catch myself with one thing in my head, as if I shut my eyes and slipped into a time warp; it’s her. Her presence screams my name.
Maybe she wants to talk some more.

My head flips through images of her the first time she ever set foot on the other side of this door; one time of many following that night. Once she nervously came inside, I noticed her scraped up knees and puffy eyes, and knew something was off about her visit; not only because it was the middle of the night either. The need to ask her what was wrong burned through me, but something about her frightened eyes told me to leave it alone. Instead, I chose to try and make her laugh. I know that’s always what I need when I get in a fight with Dad and brother, so I figured it was worth a try.

My legs fly to the door and my hand falls to the knob with an urgent force as I fling it open, but as soon as I look up, all my hopes fade and all thoughts of revisiting one of those sacred memories we shared are shattered.

“Hey you,” Skylar’s voice hums in a flirty tone.

Unfortunately, with my head and heart in a different place, this visit comes as an unexpected surprise that borders on annoying and nearly intrusive, at no fault of hers at all.

“Hey,” I draw out then look around inside my camper, suddenly feeling awkward at having her here. The same feeling crept over me earlier, but I forced it from the surface of my mind and shoved it down deep to where it may never haunt me again. I was wrong; Piper will always be with me. “What’s up?” I ask nonchalantly, still blocking the doorway like a jackass.

She huffs out a laugh and looks around me with her eyebrows arched. “Well, can I come in?”

I instantly look at my wrist like I actually have a watch wrapped around it; hell I don’t even think I own one.

“You know what…”
What the hell are you doing? Just invite her in.
My heart and head wage a war that simply should not even be happening. In the end, my head gives up. “It’s late.”
Lame excuse for turning down a booty call. What am I doing?

Skylar’s hands instantly shoot to her hips like she has them on autopilot for when idiots like me piss her off.

“Late?” she says innocently with a hint of hurt. “I just thought you might want some company, so I…”

Panicked, I bounce down the stairs and let the door slip shut behind me. “Company sounds good. I was actually feeling a bit antsy and thought I’d go for a little stroll. Hang on.” In two seconds flat, I spin on my feet, fly inside and throw my phone into my back pocket and hastily shove my feet into my sneakers without untying them before rushing back out to finish up damage control. “I have an early start in the morning, working on those heaters and all, but how about I walk you back to the cabin?”

In the darkness, I can barely make out the skepticism in her glare, but then she relaxes with a soft laugh. For all I know she may think I have some mystery chick shacked up inside.

Her hands fall and she hops over to my side, bumping her shoulder against mine playfully.

“Ok…I guess you talked me into it. Rain check on the visit I suppose?”

I nod, lazily shoving my hands into my side pockets with a shiver.
I hate this cold ass weather.
Clearly reading my mind, Skylar nuzzles to my side with the heat of her hand burning clear through my thick sweatshirt.

“Rain check sounds good. I figured everyone would be passed out over your way.” I nudge my head towards Piper’s cabin. “Couldn’t sleep? Or are you just so needy for all this?” I shift my hips forward with a smirk and she busts out in a laugh.

“Well, of course, I’m always needy for that, but no…they were just getting a little too rowdy and noisy so I said screw this.”

Knitting my eyebrows in concern, I snap my head over to look at her. “Rowdy? Did someone get in a fight?”

Breaking into a cough sort of laugh, she pulls closer to my side. “Ahhh, I wouldn’t call that a fight, unless it’s the making up after one.”

My eyes widen as we draw nearer to the cabin and a spark of anger and fury bolts through my veins.

“Who?!” I snap.

“What do you mean who? Everyone except me of course. Single girl here…” She holds her ring finger up, twirling it in the air. “Remember? Kind of an awkward situation staying in a cabin with couples. I mean, who wants to listen to a whole bunch of huffing and puffing from another room and not have…”

“Wait! You mean Piper is…” my voice elevates right as my phone rings.
Who the hell is calling me at this hour?

Skylar remains quiet as I jerk it out with a frown cemented across my face. Right about now I feel like saying to hell with being out here. I do not need to know when she is so carelessly getting it on with someone else. I know it’s jealousy, but damn it pisses me off to know how scarred she was back when we were together and how much effort it was to just hold hands with her. Now, I guess she just hops in bed with whoever.

“Hello,” I spit out, not even bothering to look at the screen before answering.

“Evan…” Abby’s frightened voice immediately has me on alert and quickening my pace to the door of their cabin.

“What’s wrong?”

Skylar follows beside me, saying something, but I’m too focused in on Abby on the other end of the phone.

“It’s Piper. She had one of her spells. I know you know what I’m talking about because she told me a long time ago that you always knew how she got and you knew how to pull her out of it when she would…”

Adrenaline races through my body and has me kicking up gravel as my feet pound the ground to get to her side. I cannot even say anything as Abby rambles on. Any amount of thought processing halts, my heart pumps frantically in my chest and the moisture in my mouth dries up, leaving a lump lodged in my throat.

The grip I have on the phone increases to a constricting hold of anger, rage, pain and dread. My hand lands on the handle to the cabin and I fling it open without so much as an invitation to come inside. I immediately search the room, a collage of sounds meeting my ears in an array of confusion.