Breathe With Me (The Breathe Series Book 3) (14 page)

I clear my mind of all thoughts and images of her, then turn and slide down the wall of the shower house. Motioning for Judd to take a seat, I point my thumb to the side and quirk my lips, edgy and uncertain of where to start.

Judd parks himself beside me, quickly typing out something on his phone before slipping it back in his jacket pocket.

“Might as well get comfortable. This could take a while.” I bounce upward on a half-hearted chuckle and stare forward, nearly seeing right back to that day as if it was yesterday. “So, yeah…I was a little peeved this morning and of course, you guessed it probably; it’s Piper. Honestly, I don’t even know what I’ve told you about our situation.” I look over, pondering on whether I’ve ever told him jack.

Judd belts out a smartass laugh that is usually reserved for me. “That’s easy…nothing. You’re like a vault on that topic. All I’ve pieced together is that she hates you…” I cringe at his assessment as he goes on. “…it drives you crazy that she does. Oh and that you must have screwed up somewhere along the way to piss her off. I just figure she can’t stand your jokes.” He laughs, tilting his head back against the wall.

“Yeah, right…” I mumble, “everyone loves my jokes.” I bounce my head back to the hard wall and catch Judd shaking his head from the corner of my eyes. Chuckling, I decide to go back to that day; back to when the drama unfolded, only I plan to keep some of it to myself. I’ve done enough damage. I trust Judd, but her secret is for her to tell, not me.

“Well you know, Piper and I have known each other since we were kids…right around twelve to thirteen?”

“Yeah, I did know that much.”

“Ok…so, the summer I met you…actually the week before you came out here for the first time, that’s basically when my life went from freaking awesome to unbelievably crappy in a matter of minutes. Seriously, one second I am about to spout poetry across the damn campground and the next I’m standing there with my mouth hanging down to the ground with no clue as to what I’ve done.” Judd remains silent, hanging onto every word…or so I hope, because I really do not want to repeat any of this. “All I knew back then and pretty much what I still know for certain is that I was waiting for Piper, but geez, I was about to bounce out of my skin. I had something to tell her and it was about to rip my lips in two.”

“Ha!” Judd chuckles; I look over, putting on my best irritated expression with my mouth and brows drawn into as deep of a frown as I can muster up. “Oh, sorry…I was just imagining you with no lips and unable to amuse us all with all your unsubtle quips and comments.” My face doesn’t budge; I remain unamused or try my best. Judd clears his throat. “So what did you need to say?”

I raise my eyebrows, keeping my facial features blank and unimpressed by his attempt at a joke. “Leave the jokes for me, dude. Just listen…what I needed to say isn’t important.”

Judd’s lips wobble as if he’s holding back a mouthful of laughter. “So you were going to tell her you love her?”

What the hell; maybe I do have a look.
I give in and grin, a bit of heat surfacing across my face that has nothing to do with the newly installed heater. This is a first for me; embarrassment, no way. I flip my head around to face forward.

“I’ll take that as a ye…” I cut him off, unwilling to let him have the satisfaction of being right, although he totally is.

“Ok, ok…that’s enough. Maybe we should forgo story time.”

“Oh come on…” Judd pauses with a snicker that leaves him covering his mouth with one hand. Recomposing himself, he keeps an eye on me, but I flick my sights forward.

Damn I do have a look. Wait, am I pouting?

“Ok, go on.”

Screw this
. Realizing I’m acting like a flipping girl at this point, wanting to give my friend the silent treatment or whine and cry about him having the last laugh, I finish my story, omitting the whole lame ass, my-heart-is-about-to-rupture-if-I-don’t-say-I-love-you-now.

“Sooooooo,” I draw out my words as I look back at him and carry on, “I take off running down the hill toward the shower…ahhh…to here,” I point down to the floor. “All I have in my head is the stupid ramblings of a sixteen-year-old prepared to bear my soul to a girl that knocks my socks off every damn day. But geesh…I round that corner, nearly collide with her Dad yelling, ‘
let’s go now’
and then come eye-to-eye with the most pissed off woman I have ever seen in my life. I mean, seriously…Grandpa warned me about looks that could burrow right through a guy’s willpower and make you do stupid ass shit that you’d deny to every single friend you have, but this look…Ho-Lee Hell.” I shake my head, remembering it so clearly. “That look could turn you to stone, shatter you into a pile of ash, and sweep you into the sewer all in a single second. I have never, ever seen that look on her face before.” I bring my hand to my forehead, haunted by the nostalgic presence of me staring directly into her eyes that day; seeing that cold gaze that said the exact opposite of what I came to say to her.

The look that said
I hate you.

I RUN UP TO THE
shower house door, hoping I will find him, but stop as soon as muffled voices capture my attention. Evan’s deep masculine tone awakens every cell in my body as I close my eyes and remember how just last night I felt that voice against my skin, in my ear and through my hair. Placing my hand on the door, I prepare to open it but wait when his words, ones I know are about me, reach out, grab my heart and take me back to that day. It’s a day that I don’t really care to revisit considering it’s the day I gave up trusting pretty much anyone; however, when I’m around him, that memory burns through me and reminds me why I should keep him at arm’s length or further.

“I don’t know what happened before I got there but she just started laying into me. I’d never seen her so livid and trust me, I’d seen all sorts of emotions from her at that point, but this was unlike anything I’d ever seen. It was like Satan was unleashed from the gates of hell and took over her body…”

His voice fades so I move my head so close to the door that it may seem to anyone else that I’m planning on making out with it. “Actually, I can play it up or down whatever, but she wasn’t pissed…she was hurt…because of me…” The usual always-have-a-comment-for everything sarcasm is drained from his voice, making my heart tug and my eyes mist over as the pain of that day engulfs me.

My feet race over the old dingy gray concrete as I rush to get back to Evan. Was he really going to say it back?

Several showers run, filling the room with steam and making it sound like a rain storm from inside the suffocating building. No sooner than my hand makes contact with the oblong handle of the door, I have it open, my skin chilled by the sudden difference in temperature. The air is hot and muggy outside, but the brisk wind that rises up from the lakeshore offers a sense of relief that isn’t found inside the musty, pathetic excuse for a public restroom.

My heart flies through the doorway, yanking me behind at a nervous and anxious pace. Two steps forward and I see a face I have never been fond of; someone that has always given me the creeps.

“Whoa…where are you racing off to?” Mitch holds up his hand, forcing me to stop in my tracks and take two strides back against the door. “You eager to get back to your mid-afternoon activities?” He smirks, but all I can do is stare.

My mouth goes dry and suddenly I feel violated, spied on during a private moment and very ashamed. I keep my eyes locked on his, looking for any sign of joking or possibly a bullshit grin that says ‘lucky guess’, but I see nothing. His hazel eyes seem amused, as they usually do, and not at all resembling the charisma of his brother’s. The humor is drained of happiness and that ha-ha factor as he puts off more of an aggressive, bullying look that is meant to intimidate. I open my mouth, but he beats me to it as he steps forward and leans closer to me; too close.

“I tell you what…” I turn my head to the side, uncomfortable with the lack of distance between us. “…for someone that I wouldn’t have given a second glance to a couple years back, you sure have turned out to be a regular hottie. I sure hope my brother has been wearing it out properly.”

I cringe and ball my fists at my side, the urge to swing at him pulsing through my veins. He braces his arm to the side of the door with his palm flat on the wall, nearly blocking any escape I may have. My breathing picks up, coming one after the next and I swear I may very well fall into one of my episodes if I don’t find a way to get him to move away from me.

“So I heard this little rumor…I was wondering if you could put it to rest for me…” he pauses as bile rises into the back of my throat and my mouth suddenly fills with saliva, taunting me with a strong desire to throw up.

He knows; Trent told him. Oh God!

“Did you really get it on with your own cousin?”

He says the words that I had already feared and all the blood drains from my face, leaving me light headed, yet a relentless flame in my need to never be treated like shit again still burns inside of me. It dwindles and nears the point of going out, but with every ounce of mortification and humiliation that I currently feel, little-by-little it is revived.

“Did you like it?”

My lip curls into a snarl and my jaw tenses as I turn to stare right into his eyes. He disgusts me. How could anyone be so cold?

“I bet you begged for…”

Without thinking, an adrenaline rush takes over and controls every bit of my body as a crack sound fills the air. My palm burns and Mitch’s eyes widen. Looking down at my hand, I realize I just slapped him across the face. I glance back to him with a soothing sense of confidence and pride. He wobbles his jaw before locking eyes with me.

“You little bitch!”

The door behind me pushes me forward.

“That is enough!” Dad’s voice booms as he steps out; my mouth drops open.

What did he hear? Oh no, what did he hear?

“What the hell is going on?”

I’m stunned, frozen as Dad speaks. This is something I’ve shoved down so deep into the pit of my soul and I never, ever wanted my parents to find out; especially my dad. He stares me down then flings his glare to Mitch, who stands there with a pleased smirk. The only comfort I take in this whole situation is the fact that a flared up red hand print lies perfectly outlined and centered across his cheek. Good!