Cailín (Lass) (Anam Céile Chronicles) (31 page)

Some
years later, I discovered the mountains which had risen from the sea before me
to be those of the Skellig Islands— often believed to actually be the
Otherworld, which is held in legend to be an island off the west coast of
Ireland. 

‘
T
was early morning when at last,
I made it ashore.  As though welcoming me back home, the shore be shrouded in
layers of dense fog.  The familiarity of it I did appreciate.  The waters
streaming from me sleek, blood red coat as I emerged from the sea, I finally
had the opportunity to glory in me new form.  Me hooves beat upon the earth as
I took off running, reveling in the sheer power of each and every muscle.

‘Twas
then I realised how horribly famished I be, having eaten nothing whilst in the
sea.  I lowered the muscular neck toward the ground and took a blade of green
grass between the lips of me muzzle.  After drawing it into me mouth and
grinding it with me molars, I thought ‘twas not as appetizing as I be hoping,
but knew it would have to do fer the time being.

After exerting
the spirit of me total independence fer that first day, I made it to me home
village of Ballyvaughan.  However, immediately disheartened I be as I
remembered that simply go home and make meself visible I could not. 

Not
entirely sure what ‘twas I should do, I wandered about the perimetre of the
village and lands deliberating upon it, remaining aware of any clues as to the
whereabouts of me loved ones.  When I saw the first signs of twilight beginning
to cast its enchanted spectrum of colours across the land, I headed in the
direction of the home of me family.

That
evening, I eavesdropped as the members of me family inside the cottage stirred
about, eating the last meal of the day.  Inhaling the scent of the aromas which
emanated from the modest chimney, me belly started to rumble as thoughts of the
tasty foods me Mama had devotedly prepared fer them seeped into me mind. 

Soft,
warm bread and Potato stew!  Oh, what I wouldn’t give fer the pleasure of
tasting Mama’s grand cookin’ right now!  Nibbling upon this grass, each blade
the same as the last, be fast growing monotonous!

Once I
heard signs that indicated the final settling of all within the cottage, I
pictured what they might be doing inside. 

Me
father kicking his boots off and relaxing with his feet up after a hard day’s
toil on the farm, puffing on a pipe. 

Me Mama
in her nightdress, the sweet scent of her hair as she takes it down and
carefully runs a comb through it before braiding it down her back and retiring
to bed.  Were I there inside, we would take turns with brushing each other’s
hair, one of me fondest memories.
 

I
sighed deeply as the memories pulled at me heartstrings, making me feel more
homesick than I had been since I had ran away from me home four years earlier.

Then a
thought occurred to me which did cheer me a bit. 

Well,
perhaps I can at least greet me old friends in the barn! 
 

Full of
joyful anticipation to be able to interact with
anyone
I had known, I
ambled into the stone barn to greet the beloved friends of me childhood. 

I
cannot wait to see Morrissey!  Oh, surely he’ll be most overjoyed to see me
again!
 

However,
when I came into the barn, I received a very different reception from the
animals than I had anticipated.  When first I did see them, all were already
turned me direction, motionless in full alert as though a wolf had wandered in
seeking his next kill. 

Their
unexpected reaction caused me to pause.  Me eyes wandered over each of them— some
new faces there be amongst the familiar.  I waited fer the ones who knew me to realise
who I be and drop their guard.  But their vigilance remained intact, even
Morrissey’s.

Perhaps
they do not know who I be and I only need to try to speak to them as I used to.
 

I
directed me communicative thoughts to them— as I once had regularly— hoping to
pardon them of their fears.  

Do not
be alarmed.  I will not harm you.  I simply want to visit with you, old
friends.  I do know I appear different, but still you must remember me.  It be
me, Aislinn!

But
alter their stance they did not. 

Then a
thought occurred to me.

What
if, paradoxically, in this new form, we cannot communicate?

I
attempted it again, thinking after all these years, perhaps I only be out of practise. 

This
time, Morrissey did speak back to me.  His tone ‘twas hesitant and suspicious.

Aye.  I
understand it be you, Aislinn.  I do not know what this spell be which has
afflicted you, but we want no part of it.  We feel the threat of the dark
energy coming from you.  If surely we be yer friends as you claim, then do not
bring yer ill fortune here to be cast upon all of us.  Be gone from here!

Morrissey,
friends, trust me, not any ill will do I have fer you, and will bring no
misfortune upon you.  I do not know why this mystical change has happened to
me, but it helped me to escape a most perilous situation and did give me the
strength to sustain meself on me long journey back home.  Please, I wish only
to rekindle our old friendship.  I swear, I mean none of you any harm!

Certain
they would be appeased with me declaration, I stepped toward them again.  As I
moved nearer to them, I felt their caution fortify, the scent of fear among
them grew thick as their fur twitched and Morrissey flattened his ears back. 
Again I be disheartened by their unaffected suspicious reaction to me, confirming
that which already I knew— something indeed be not right about me.

Not
another word exchanged between us, they disseminated well away from me, as I
laid in the straw in the midst of the barn quite dismayed, reminiscing the days
not so long ago when the lambs would crawl all over me as one of them, nibbling
at me hair affectionately . . .  Now I appeared as them, and they wanted naught
to do with me!  Me heart swelled with grief and I longed to relieve the
pressure of it with tears.

Drawing
what little comfort I could from the familiar surroundings, there I did remain
until morning, sleeping upon the bed of straw.  Afore sunrise, I reluctantly
removed meself from the barn, fer I knew me father would soon be emerging from
the cottage to tend to the animals. 

I did
not look back as I wandered out into the day.  I could not bear to be reminded
of the heartbreaking way in which me old friends had recoiled from me.

To the
backside of the barn I ambled and hovered on the outside.  I had intention of
observing what I could of me family— and I hoped, Donovan— surely amidst their
grief over me mysterious disappearance. 

Momentarily
I detected some rustling about in the cottage, and before long me father
emerged, heading toward the barn.  I remained quietly hidden behind some
shrubbery in the distance.  I don’t know why ‘twas I felt a stab of
disappointment when he did not appear in any way to be troubled.  I solaced
meself with the knowledge that surely me mama would show signs of upset over me
disappearance.

“What
be the matter with you beasts?” he straightaway grumbled at them upon plodding
into the barn.  “You all look as if you’re expectin’ to be slaughtered directly!”

Not
long after, me Mama emerged from the cottage.  Though I did not wish to feel
happy fer it, relieved I be to note the obvious signs of weariness upon her
face. 

I knew
she would lament me disappearance!

So
badly I did wish to relieve her concerns.  It took all me restraint not to jump
out at her and announce, “Here I be!”, but I did not wish to scare her to
death!  And of course, I wouldn’t be able to tell her as I had the animals,
that this
aiteann
that she does not recognise be her own daughter!  Moreover,
I knew I could not besides, at least not just yet; fer never would I endanger
those I loved, even if it meant worrying them with me continued absence.
 

Weeks
passed by and I watched over them as me father, me mama, and me brother
searched diligently fer me.  All the while, I struggled to reason with me
instincts. 

“I do
not know why ‘tis we be wastin’ our time in continuing our search fer that
ungrateful lass!” I heard me father
griping one day.
 
“Why do you
not accept she has only been reclaimed by the faeries to be wed to their
chief?  Obviously, they had to capture her from her mortal wedding, before she
could be ruined fer him!” he adamantly
insisted pragmatically.

Me mama
shot him a contemptuous look.  “You should scoot on home, then!  Yer poisonous
outlook will only serve to bring misfortune upon the rest of us!”  Her head
cocked with her hands placed firm upon her hips, she cast him a daring look.

Father
knew better than to actually heed her suggestion.  Instead, he went on
pretending to search, all the while grumbling to himself, naturally.

At
least Mama has not given up on me!

I began
to come to be downcast, wondering why Donovan never be with them fer the
search. 

Perhaps
he has already given up on me, or only be more than glad to be released of me!
 

Then,
one afternoon, me ears did perk up when I heard me Mama mention him.

“MacAuliffe! 
You need to go find that lad and warn him to curtail his isolated searching out
there in the
Boireann
afore
Whitsuntide
be upon us!” Mama ordered
me father.  “Donovan’s practically kin, and I won’t have us losin’ him, too!”

Of
course, he would be searching fer me there, knowing as only he does the
significance of that place fer me!

I gazed
lingeringly at me mama fer a long moment before dashing toward the
Boireann
. 

‘Tis
alright
, I told meself,
I will reunite with her again soon once
this all be under control!

That
area being so vast and rugged, I feared I would never be able to find Donovan. 
But me heightened senses led me virtually right to him.  At last I located him,
but I be immensely discouraged to discover that, indeed, I did have the same
intense craving fer him that I had experienced in the presence of others— a
craving that be well beyond me usual physical desires fer him.  Distraught at
this discovery, and not knowing what to do, I hovered nigh in contemplation. 

I
observed him in secrecy, gazing upon him, drinking him in with me eyes and me
nostrils, torturing meself with the savouring of his delectable scent upon the
air. 

How
could I ever have thought fer a second to leave him behind?  Donovan be
everything to me!  I would not want a life that did not include him in it! 
Then again, will I ever actually be able to control these overpowering appalling
urges to consume him? 
 

Braver
I became, edging ever closer, ‘til eventually I be within full sight of him. 
Finally, he became aware of me presence.  Thrilled I be that Donovan was quite
mesmerized by the beautiful red
aiteann
which he discovered to be
following him. 

Although
Donovan did think it rather odd that his own mount reacted with great caution
toward me.  And when the light descended at the end of each day, he marveled
again at how that
aiteann
shadowed him as he made the trek back home. 

Just to
be near him— if even in that different form— gave me great solace, just fer his
eyes to look upon me and smile and fer him to chat at me mindlessly in attempt
to pass the time and ward off his loneliness.  His presence eased me heart. 
All felt right with me world once again. 

“So, tell
me lass, what do you think?  Where is it we should be searchin’?” Donovan
queried me.  “I don’t know why I have the outlandish feeling that you know
where she be.  Maybe ‘tis only the striking resemblance of your coat to her red
hair that has me relating you to her.”

I tried
to remind meself not to gaze into his eyes too deeply, fer he wouldn’t
understand, and I feared me sadness would be too easily detected in them.