What Happiness Looks Like (Promises) (23 page)

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

JOELY

The police insisted Anna go to the hospital. Dalton had offered to come with them, but Joely told him to tuck Ryan into bed—it was already way past his bedtime, she was sure.

Anna sat on an exam table covered with white paper and swung her legs over the edge.

Joely rubbed a towel against Anna’s blond curls. Adrenaline continued to loop through her. Dropping the towel, she folded her arms around Anna’s lean body and hugged her again.

Anna giggled. “Mom, you can stop worrying now. I’m OK.”

Joely gave a weak smile, tears brimming in her eyes. “I was afraid you’d fallen into the river.” A drop rolled down each cheek.

With her tiny thumbs, Anna wiped Joely’s tears. “Don’t worry. If I had, I would’ve kicked and made big scoops with my arms like Daddy taught me.”

Joely was definitely signing Anna up for swim lessons as soon as possible. “Are you hungry? Thirsty? I can get you something.”

Anna shook her head. “Mommy, did you forget? Uncle Mitch went to the cafeteria to get me French fries.”

Joely
had
forgotten—her mind a jumble of thoughts and emotions. Mitch had come right away when Dalton had called, but Kate was still missing. Joely hoped her sister hadn’t been in an accident. A night like this could cause a lot of misery.

Anna’s eyebrows shot up and she grinned her toothless grin. She pointed past Joely’s shoulder.

Joely turned around to see what Anna was looking at. Jake filled the doorframe with his six foot two frame. He rushed forward and embraced Anna. “Are you OK?”

Anna nodded. “I got lost playing hide-n-seek.”

Joely cleared her throat. “At night. In a thunderstorm.”

“It wasn’t raining when we started playing.” Again, Anna kicked the exam table with her heels. “Daddy’s here. Daddy’s here.” She reached toward him for another hug.

Jake squeezed her then touched her chin. “Has a doctor seen you yet?”

Anna shook her head and Joely spoke up. “We’re a low priority, I guess. With the storm, there have been a lot of car accidents.”

Worry lines etched across his brow. “My daughter is not low-priority. As soon as I get a doctor in here and you’re declared the most awesome little girl in the world, I’m taking you to the gift shop and you can pick out anything you want.”

Anna clapped her hands. “Yippee!”

After she watched him exit, Joely followed him out into the hall. She lowered her voice. “How did you know we were here?”

He ran his hand through his dark blond hair. “Mitch called me.” He checked his watch. “Made it here in record time. I’m lucky I didn’t get a speeding ticket.”

“Or get in an accident yourself.” Joely studied his blue eyes, trying to deny the warmth growing inside her chest. She watched him march toward the nurse’s station, confident he would get what he wanted. Glad that Anna’s well-being was the thing that he wanted.

A little while later, the doctor discharged Anna and explained that the gift shop was closed. Anna started counting by thousands as she walked with Joely, Jake and Mitch down the windowed corridor. When they reached the end, they stood at the hospital’s glass doors watching the rain.

Mitch shook Jake’s hand. “Glad you could make it.” He looked at Joely as if to say, “I knew he’d come through.” Instead, he said, “I’ll see you back at the house.” She nodded and watched him take off through the rain, holding his coat over his head as a shield.

The three of them lingered a moment. What was it about the rain that made people hesitate? Joely squeezed Anna’s hand as a flash of lightning illuminated the parking lot.

Jake pointed toward her car parked in the closest non-handicapped spot. “Is that yours?”

Joely nodded and Anna started counting again, “One-one thousand, two-one thousand. . .”

He peered out the window, squinting. “It looks to me like you have a flat tire.”

Joely released Anna’s fingers. “No-o-o.” She used her hands to block the light from inside the hospital and gazed out the window. Everything outside looked black and shiny—the pavement, her car, her tires. Even though she was parked under a light, it was hard to tell from there.

Anna mumbled to herself. “Five-one thousand, six-one thousand. . .”

“The tire on the passenger’s side looks flat,” he said.

“Great.” Joely sighed. How had that happened? Maybe she’d run over a nail on the way in. They were building a new housing development near the hospital.

He gave Joely a sympathetic look. “Why don’t I give you a ride home?”

She shook her head. “Then I’ll have to ask Kate or Mitch to drive me back here tomorrow to pick up my car.” The last thing she wanted to do was ask them for another favor. She was starting to realize that she’d asked them for too much.

Thunder rattled the windows. Anna clapped. “The storm is moving away from us. If you count the number of seconds between the lightning and thunder and compare them, you can tell which direction the storm is going.”

Shoving his hands in his pockets, he looked at Joely. “Do you have AAA?”

She laughed. “Right. I can’t afford that.” She sighed again. “Will you stay here with Anna while I go change it?”

“No way.” He held out his palm. “Give me your keys and I’ll go change the tire. You take AJ over there and wait.” He gestured toward a nearby seating area.

Joely looked at the four chairs placed in a circle, but didn’t move. “Do you even know how to change a tire?”

Apparently insulted, Jake made a face. “Yes. I know how to change a tire. Now give me those keys.”

Joely bit her lip. She didn’t really want to change a tire in the rain. The last time she’d had a flat, she’d stomped on the lug wrench and still could barely get it to turn. But she hated to ask Jake to do it either. “What about the lightning? I don’t want you to get electrocuted.”

Anna tugged on Joely’s sleeve. “Mom, I told you the storm is moving away.”

Raising his eyebrows, Jake wiggled his fingers near Joely’s chin. “It won’t take me long.”

With a shrug, Joely fished the keys out of her purse and placed them in his hand. “Thanks.”

He pulled his coat up over his head just like Mitch had, then made a mad dash for the car. Joely did not take Anna over to sit down. Instead, they stood watching through the streaming windows as Jake jacked up the car and twisted the lug wrench. Fortunately, Anna was right. The lightning had subsided.

Jake, the king of grand gestures and lack of follow-through, changed her tire in the pouring rain. He wasn’t especially fast, but he did get the job done. He’d driven an hour and a half just to give his daughter a hug and make sure she was OK. The old Jake would’ve called the gift shop and had them send Anna a bouquet of “get well soon” balloons.

Anna’s wish had finally come true. Her daddy loved her.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SEVEN

JOELY

Joely woke up early the next morning because Anna woke up early. Anna had begged to sleep in her mom’s double bed, which they sometimes did when Anna had a bad dream. Last night had certainly been a bad dream for Joely. Secretly she was glad for Anna’s request so she could hear her daughter’s steady breathing on the pillow next to her all through the night.

Now Anna kicked off the floral sheets. “Can I go see if Aunt Kate is awake?”

Joely checked her Picasso wall clock. Seven a.m. Her mind filled with fog. She wasn’t sure if it was a workday or a weekend. “Why don’t you go watch PBS Kids for a while?”

Anna bounded out of bed and stopped when she tried to turn the doorknob. Suddenly Joely remembered Lily’s knife and the fight she’d had with Kate.

Usually curious, Anna didn’t bother to ask why the door was locked, she simply opened it and ran barefooted out of the room. Television first thing in the morning was a real treat.

Joely rubbed her tired eyes. Although she loved snuggling with Anna, she hadn’t slept well beside her. When she had managed to actually sleep, she’d had nightmares about finding Anna flat on her back covered in blood, stabbed by the branch of a fallen tree. Obviously her subconscious had merged her two fears.

Remembering the night’s events, anger welled inside of her. She shouldn’t have listened to Dalton when he said it was OK for the kids to play outside alone. She should’ve listened to her gut.

Her hands clenched. She hated herself for letting Anna get lost. Anna could’ve been hurt or even killed. Joely shook her head.

When she got up to close the door and turn on her CD player, it felt like knives stabbing her knees. This was the price she paid for over-exerting herself. She crawled back under the covers. Billy Joel’s fingers danced across the keyboard in the intro to “Piano Man”. The perfect song to listen to while resting in bed.

When the harmonica came in, she hummed along with it. In college at last call, the d.j. at one of the bars where she and Jake had hung out, would play this song. Everyone would put their arms around each other’s shoulders and they would sway and sing along. They would point to each other as the characters were named: the wanna-be novelist, the guy who hoped to be a movie star, and the poli-sci major who waited tables. In their youth, they’d all thought it was great fun, confident they’d be the ones to make it big.

Joely started to cry. A soft, nearly silent cry.

All of those people in the song were stuck.

And she knew she was stuck, too. For Anna’s entire life, Joely had been stuck. She’d turned down Dalton based on her role model status and yet what kind of an example was she really setting for her daughter? She didn’t want to someday tell Anna, “I could’ve been an artist”.

Joely heaved a big sigh and wiped her eyes with the sheet.

Seeing her silk robe hanging on the bedpost, she reached for it. She slid into the shimmering, lace-trimmed sleeves, imagining herself a Hollywood starlet. Jake had surprised her with the robe after one of those nights at the bar—even though there hadn’t been any special occasion.

It occurred to her that she’d given Dalton his clothes back, but for some reason, she’d never gotten rid of this reminder of Jake. Tying the belt around her waist, she smiled to herself.

Because of the lupus, she knew she couldn’t make it on her own. But she had a network of friends in Michigan. She’d just have to swallow her pride and be willing to ask for help when she needed it. Plus, Kate would probably come up on weekends just like she used to. And now it looked like maybe she could count on Jake, too.

Joely headed for the nearest phone, ready to ask for her first favor.

KATE

When Kate entered the living room, her breath caught in her throat. Lying on their stomachs, their chins propped up on their elbows, were Anna and Bobby. Anna was in a pink seersucker nightgown and Bobby was in Batman p.j.s. They didn’t even look up when she entered the room, their attention focused on “Dinosaur Train”.

Kate’s hand pressed against her chest. This is what it would be like to have children. Her eyes watered.

She went to the kitchen and started making waffles, just as she had always fantasized about doing for her family.

# # #

“Should a child go to his father’s funeral?” Kate asked Mitch as they stood in front of the bathroom mirror after breakfast.

He squeezed toothpaste onto his electric toothbrush. “Did you go to yours?”

She nodded. “But I was older. Bobby’s only two. I don’t know how much he understands. Death is an abstract concept at that age.” She opened a tiny drawer and pulled out her hairbrush.

“Maybe that’s for the best.” He pushed the “on” button and the toothbrush began to whir.

Kate ran the brush through her hair. She had studied grief counseling a bit in school. She knew about Kubler-Ross’ seven stages of grief, but she didn’t know about how a kid barely out of diapers would deal with it. When he was older, he’d cycle through anger, denial, acceptance etc. Now he’d probably pick up on everyone else’s sadness. He’d be more of a happy distraction for the adults than gain anything beneficial for himself.

She put down her hairbrush. “I won’t take him to the funeral.”

In the end, it didn’t matter. Evan didn’t have a funeral because he didn’t have any family to arrange one. The problem was if Evan didn’t have any family, then Bobby didn’t either.

LILY

Dear Dayna,

Mrs. H stopped by today. She acted hurt that I had moved out without telling her. I think she would’ve been hurt anyway since I decided I didn’t want her to keep you. I thought you and Butch and me could make some kind of a family—not like the fake happy ones you see on TV—but something kind of good. Now I’m not so sure. Butch complains when I ask him to watch you when I go to work at the library. And he got fired from the gas station for stealing cigarettes so I don’t know how we’re going to pay rent this month.

Mrs. H said I’m welcome back anytime. Sometimes I can’t get over how crazy nice she is. She always was, though, even when she was my counselor at Foxworth High. Other teachers eyed me like they thought I might pull a Columbine or something, but she talked to me, asked me what I was reading (always Stephen King) and she told me I was smart. I guess maybe she was right about that last part because she brought over my college acceptance letter. I can’t believe they let me in!

Anyway, I don’t think I’ll go. But I’m taping the acceptance letter here in my notebook so that you can see it. Maybe that will be Plan B.

Your mom,