Heart's Desire (22 page)

CHAPTER THIRTY

M
ADDIE
WORE
A
lime-green linen sheath to the wedding rehearsal and walked down the aisle on Jerry Mason’s arm. No one had expected Nate to be Luke’s best man after Maddie had broken their engagement. Of all the depressing exercises a person could go through, being the maid of honor in a best friend’s wedding only a few days after one’s own breakup, had to top the list, Maddie thought.

Though Maddie saw Mrs. Beabots sitting in the front pew smiling at her, she was barely able to crook the ends of her lips upward. Father Michael gave instructions as to who was to stand where and at what point they would walk out of the church, but to Maddie the words were muddled, as if she were swimming under water.

All Maddie thought about was Nate. She remembered him as the young boy she’d loved so desperately, and then her mind was filled with visions of him sitting at Cove Beach watching the blood-red sun sink into the dark horizon. Nate, who helped her move furniture and bake cupcakes when she knew he was exhausted and should have been catching up on his sleep. In her mind, they had fit together like fingers in a glove. Before he left, it was almost as if the decade of emptiness and anger had never happened. She had been filled with only love for him.

How am I ever going to live without him?

Her decision to let him go to pursue his dreams didn’t seem so noble anymore. It might have been the right thing to do, but the reality of knowing she’d pushed Nate away for good was killing her.

Maddie wasn’t sure if the sharp, stabbing pains in her heart would subside. They hadn’t dissipated completely during the first decade of their separation. She’d dealt with the loneliness and emptiness by turning to anger. This time, she knew she could never be angry at Nate again. She loved him too much.

Maddie watched Sarah and Luke as they gazed into each other’s eyes, happiness radiating from them. Though she wished Sarah all the best, Maddie was saddened and even a bit jealous that all that love could have been hers.

At that moment, Maddie knew that even at seventeen, her heart had steered her right. She’d been Nate’s girl and she always would be.

At the rehearsal dinner at the lodge, Maddie sat at the far end of the table, next to Luke’s father, Paul, with Sarah on her right. The table was decorated with an arrangement of white roses, variegated pittosporum and silk aquamarine ribbons that Sarah had made the night before. Maddie had brought red velvet cupcakes for dessert and had helped Sarah wrap her bride’s gifts in aqua paper and glittery ribbon. Though the conversations were happy and lively, Maddie felt as if she were standing on a foreign shore, looking at life from a great distance. She was disconnected and adrift and she didn’t know how she would find her way back. Common sense told her that eventually she’d find her way again, and she’d build a life without Nate just as she’d done before. Maddie also knew that everything about her was different this time. Although she was grieving the loss of Nate, she’d learned that she didn’t need to a wear a mask of anger and hate any longer. She wasn’t interested in revenge. She’d learned exactly how much she’d contributed to her first breakup, and that a great deal of the heartbreak and pain she’d suffered had been self-inflicted. Yes, she’d used those negative emotions to spur her desire for achievement in her career, but now that she was reaching her dream and experiencing the inner fulfillment of her successes, she found that none of it equaled being with Nate. Sharing with Nate. Planning a future with Nate.

She was astounded at how much she loved him. It seemed impossible that her love could run so deep. Deep enough to let him go forever.

* * *

L
UKE
SAW
HIM
first and placed his hand on Sarah’s arm to still her conversation. Mrs. Beabots held her breath and slowly turned her head.

“Maddie?” Nate said, approaching the table without a word of apology to anyone else. “Maddie, I need to talk to you.”

Maddie’s heart stood still. She felt wonder and surprise flood her body and no matter what her intentions had been a second ago, she was overjoyed to see him.

“What’s going on? You’re supposed to be in Arizona,” she said, rising quickly and moving toward him.

He reached out his hand. “Let’s go down to the shore.”

“Okay...” Maddie glanced at Sarah, who was smiling at her. “Sarah, will you excuse me?”

Sarah shooed her with a wave of her hand. “Go!”

Maddie gladly put her hand in Nate’s, feeling his gentle but strong hold. Suddenly, she knew. She was no longer drifting. She had found her mooring. She smiled up at him and he smiled back as they headed down to the beach.

The sun had barely set and the moon was full in the east, casting silver-and-gold rays across the water.

Nate stopped by a huge maple tree and pulled Maddie close. “I want you to know that I understand what you did.”

“Which was?”

“Breaking up with me. You thought you were doing me a favor, but it was the worst thing that could have happened to me.”

“But your career...”

“Is just that. My work. It’s not my life. When I first came back here, I admit I thought of it only as a means to an end. A stepping stone to running the clinics out in Arizona. And then I saw you in that wedding gown, and I swear, Maddie...” He wrapped his arms around her. “I thought I would go insane. I felt I lost you. And I can’t take that.”

“Really?” she asked, feeling there was more to the story but knowing he wanted to do the talking right now. She’d made enough mistakes where they were concerned. She was glad he was taking the lead.

“Yeah,” he said, kissing her cheek and then nuzzling into the crook of her neck. “Maddie, you have to know I wanted to stay here for you. You’re all I’ve ever really wanted.”

“Nate, I love you so much. I’ll always want what’s best for you. You sacrificed so much for this opportunity in Arizona.”

“No, Maddie. Don’t you see? It’s not enough. I want
you
. And I’ve thought about this ever since your phone call. I don’t have to move to Arizona at all. There are reservations all around Lake Michigan, not far from here. I’ve already checked into a couple of the hospitals that serve those reservations. Their need is tremendous. We don’t have to move away from your friends or my family at all. We can build a lake house together. Some day, we can get a condo in Chicago, if you want it. We can take trips to Italy for you to study or just drink in the experience. I want to be there. I don’t want to miss a day of exploring all of life with you.” He hugged her excitedly and then released her. “It’s going to be hard work sometimes for both of us, but I think we can make it happen. Neither of us has ever shied from a challenge. And I’m willing if you are.”

“More than willing, Nate,” she replied, touching his cheek.

“When I think of all the fun we’ll have, just the two of us, it fills me with more desire than I’ve ever known. I swear, I’ll jump out of my skin, I’m so on fire with it all.”

“Nate. I haven’t seen you like this since...”

“We were kids?”

“Yeah. And I like it.” She grinned.

“Me, too. So, now will you put my ring back on?”

“Yes. I love you, Nate,” she said as he tightened his embrace.

“I love you, Maddie. Forever and always.”

* * *

S
ARAH
’
S
WEDDING
DRESS
finally found her. It was a strapless, full A-line gown in gossamer-thin organza with a white taffeta underskirt, aqua sash at the waist and a cascade of silk white-and-aqua roses down the back train. Sarah believed the gown had been made for her.

Maddie’s gown was a simple aqua organza over an aqua linen sleeveless sheath. She wore gold, low-heeled sandals and carried a nosegay of white roses with aqua streamers.

Maddie was proud to walk down the aisle on Nate’s arm, and she thought that he and the groom looked especially handsome in their navy blazers, sand-colored slacks, white shirts and aqua-and-white-striped ties. Maddie thought that hers and Nate’s happiness at being together again was equaled only by the joy of the bride and groom.

The ceremony at St. Mark’s was heartfelt and moving as Sarah and Luke spoke their own vows to each other. Mrs. Beabots cried, and Annie and Timmy were filled with so much joy, they could barely stand still.

Cove Beach glittered under the setting sun, and all of Sarah’s well-planned and exquisitely executed decorations added sparkle and festivity to the ambience. The flickering mason jars looked like fat fireflies in the tree limbs. Huge baskets of summer flowers hung from the tent poles and the hundreds of aqua bows and crystal Italian lights streamed throughout the tent’s interior, creating a summer night’s dreamland effect.

The round tables were covered in white linens, as was the buffet table. Sarah’s simple menu of cold salmon, ham, Caesar salad and Italian breads was enjoyed by all their guests.

The steel-drum player added just the right tropical touch to the occasion, and even those who didn’t normally dance got up to twirl around on the sandy beach or on the portable wooden dance floor.

Mrs. Beabots toasted the bride with champagne after Maddie and Nate offered their toasts. Timmy recited a poem and Annie sang a heartfelt rendition of “Unforgettable” that brought everyone to their feet in applause. Charmaine Chalmers accepted an invitation to dance from Edgar Clayton, while Isabelle and Scott Abbott held each other and barely moved to the music.

Nate had just pulled Maddie onto the small dance floor when they heard a woman scream.

Nate was instantly on alert. “What the...”

Nate and Luke shot to the edge of the tent and looked toward the poorly lit parking area. A man was outlined by a street lamp.

“Maddie!” the man yelled.

Maddie’s breath froze in her chest and her heart skipped a beat. “Alex.”

Luke ground his jaw. “What’s going on?”

Nate pulled Luke back. “It’s Alex. Let me handle this.”

“I’m here to back you up, bro,” Luke assured him.

Maddie rushed up to Nate. “What’s he doing here?”

Nate shook his head. “Go back with Sarah, Maddie.”

Alex stopped on the shells and gravel ten feet from Nate. “I came for Maddie,” Alex said, slurring his words. “It’s okay, Maddie. You can come with me.”

Maddie was aghast. She boldly took a step toward him.

Nate grabbed her arm, but she shook her head. She kept her eyes locked on Alex. “You’ve been drinking.”

“I came to my senses, is all. I know that a girl like you wouldn’t be happy just living with a guy. I was stupid to offer you so little. You want it all. So, I’m here to give it to you. Your entire dream. The franchises. The city life. Me. Marry me, Maddie.”

A gasp raced through the wedding guests. No one moved.

Maddie was undaunted. “Alex. I thought we had this all out this morning when you called me. I told you that I’m marrying Nate,” Maddie replied, feeling sympathy for Alex.

“Maddie,” Alex said. “Be reasonable.”

She stepped away from Nate and started to move closer to Alex, but Nate held her back. “No, Maddie.”

Nate put Maddie behind him and took two very long strides toward the distraught man. “You need to sober up and go home, Alex.”

Alex clenched his fists, swaying a little. “I wanna talk to Maddie.”

“Okay, let’s go to that picnic table,” Maddie urged. “We’ll talk there.”

Nate cast Maddie a pleading look. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’ll be fine,” she said, taking Alex’s arm to steady him as they walked over to the table.

Luke put his hand on Nate’s shoulder. “Don’t give him more than five minutes.”

“Maddie’s my girl. She could go off with him for two days and I’d trust her.”

“Good for you, man.” Luke slapped his back and then returned to Sarah.

Once they reached the picnic table, Maddie faced Alex angrily. “What in the world were you thinking? You could have killed yourself or someone else driving in a condition like this!”

“Sorry,” he said morosely.

“Alex. For goodness’ sake. You didn’t honestly think I would go away with you, did you?”

“I was hoping you’d see that I was serious.”

“Desperate, you mean.”

“Okay. That. But we’re such a good team, Maddie,” Alex said more soberly. “I think we can do great things together.”

“I know we will. And I’ll always want you for a friend. That’s important to me. Can we do that, Alex? Be friends and business associates?”

He looked up at the stars and paused for a long moment. “Yeah. Yeah, I don’t like it, but maybe that’s the best for us after all.”

“You take care, Alex,” she said and kissed his cheek.

He smiled lovingly and touched her nose. “You, too.”

“If I get one of the guys to drive you over to the motel, will you book a room and sleep this off? I don’t want you driving anywhere right now.”

“Fine. I’ll go wait in my car.”

“In the backseat,” she warned.

“Okay.” Alex rose and walked slowly toward his car. Maddie turned around and found Nate standing with arms crossed over his chest next to the tie-down ropes on the tent.

He smiled as she walked up. “Everything okay?” he asked.

“Could Mica drive him to the Cove Inn and get him a room? He needs to sleep this off.”

“Sure,” Nate said looking over Maddie’s head as Alex flopped into the back seat of his car.

Maddie beamed up at Nate, curled her arms around his neck and kissed him. “Everything is right in the world,” she said. “Especially in my world because I have you.”

Nate folded his arms around her. “Yes, you do, Maddie. You have me always.”

* * * * *

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